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The Secret to Relationships is..
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By *rRiosMan 46 weeks ago
dublin |
"Compromise is definitely needed, what if the person has a traumatic past?"
Then perhaps therapy, but this is way too broad and there are way too many variables to get into the s on specifics… Best of luck op  |
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That the partners in the relationship fought and bled for each other.
Weird one, I imagine for most of the posters here, but serious philosophers think everything else is wishy washy and I tend to agree. |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Friendship
What about being in the 'friend zone'?
You need a balance, like you love laughing and fucking about with them but also want to jump on them"
Yes, I like this answer - maybe you're doing 'something' naturally you don't realise? |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Awareness of who is most suited to you and willingness to make a go of it "
That's tricky lol, ask a man about another guy and he'll know where the dude is coming from.
Men should ask women about this one or that one because again just like men, women are experts on other women.
But it can be tricky figuring out the opposite sex.. |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Kindness"
Ok, so we got a man who is kind, but a bit too kind..
He opens doors for you, he cooks and cleans for you, respects you and listens to every word you say, is that what you'd want??
eek! |
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By *rRiosMan 46 weeks ago
dublin |
"Kindness
Ok, so we got a man who is kind, but a bit too kind..
He opens doors for you, he cooks and cleans for you, respects you and listens to every word you say, is that what you'd want??
eek!"
Dude, I feel you are reaching for answers that a forum can’t give you in this instance. Best of luck  |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Communication, compromise, connection, and commitment."
Sure, there's communication, compromise, connection, commitment, respect, being spontaneous, laughing and playing like children, love, forgiveness, on the same wavelength, similar interests, kindness, etc etc etc etc.
All these are wonderful, but they are many ingredients.
What if there was past trauma or a tough life, a good person had a cruel past, where all all these things now?
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Kindness
Ok, so we got a man who is kind, but a bit too kind..
He opens doors for you, he cooks and cleans for you, respects you and listens to every word you say, is that what you'd want??
eek!
Dude, I feel you are reaching for answers that a forum can’t give you in this instance. Best of luck "
Thank you sir, but I'm not LOOKING for the answer! |
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By (user no longer on site) 46 weeks ago
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"Awareness of who is most suited to you and willingness to make a go of it
That's tricky lol, ask a man about another guy and he'll know where the dude is coming from.
Men should ask women about this one or that one because again just like men, women are experts on other women.
But it can be tricky figuring out the opposite sex.."
That is precisely the reason I talk about awareness/self awareness. Its hugely lacking in many.
But there's loads of different things needed for a good relationship and I just didn't want to write an essay  |
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"Communication, compromise, connection, and commitment.
Sure, there's communication, compromise, connection, commitment, respect, being spontaneous, laughing and playing like children, love, forgiveness, on the same wavelength, similar interests, kindness, etc etc etc etc.
All these are wonderful, but they are many ingredients.
What if there was past trauma or a tough life, a good person had a cruel past, where all all these things now?
"
Sure you can 'what if' or second guess any answers.
The fact is there is no secret. A relationship is an evolving thing. |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Communication, compromise, connection, and commitment.
Sure, there's communication, compromise, connection, commitment, respect, being spontaneous, laughing and playing like children, love, forgiveness, on the same wavelength, similar interests, kindness, etc etc etc etc.
All these are wonderful, but they are many ingredients.
What if there was past trauma or a tough life, a good person had a cruel past, where all all these things now?
Sure you can 'what if' or second guess any answers.
The fact is there is no secret. A relationship is an evolving thing."
I disagree.
But that's ok. |
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By *anUTV/TS 46 weeks ago
Rural |
Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there 
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there
"
"I'm here becuse I'm not all there" very interesting statement but for amazing reasons and a clue to the key of your heart. |
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By *anUTV/TS 46 weeks ago
Rural |
"Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there
"I'm here becuse I'm not all there" very interesting statement but for amazing reasons and a clue to the key of your heart."
That key is well and truly in the dark, like that old Sufi parable, a holy man seen a guy looking around a lamp light, he's looking for his key under the lamp. Why look there he said, because it's bright...
Not everything that glitters is gold, or if you're buying a second hand fridge always go for the rusty ones
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there
"I'm here becuse I'm not all there" very interesting statement but for amazing reasons and a clue to the key of your heart.
That key is well and truly in the dark, like that old Sufi parable, a holy man seen a guy looking around a lamp light, he's looking for his key under the lamp. Why look there he said, because it's bright...
Not everything that glitters is gold, or if you're buying a second hand fridge always go for the rusty ones
"
Words of wisdom no doubt, it is what is it
Interesting that the key was there all the time and not so difficult to find after all.. |
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By *anUTV/TS 46 weeks ago
Rural |
"Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there
"I'm here becuse I'm not all there" very interesting statement but for amazing reasons and a clue to the key of your heart.
That key is well and truly in the dark, like that old Sufi parable, a holy man seen a guy looking around a lamp light, he's looking for his key under the lamp. Why look there he said, because it's bright...
Not everything that glitters is gold, or if you're buying a second hand fridge always go for the rusty ones
Words of wisdom no doubt, it is what is it
Interesting that the key was there all the time and not so difficult to find after all.."
Yeah it was in the dark corner, sometimes the cure or treasure is in the dark or the sickness.
A bad relationship has strengthened many a man and woman who had the wisdom of knowing the difference and walked away and found their freedom and it's the simplest things in life that are most precious.
A relationship with myself through the dark nights of the soul is what got me out of the delusional that a relationship with someone else is the be all and end all
It's only the beginning if it happens, the end lol  |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Trust is paramount, but there's so much distraction in this day and age and admittedly if I was looking for a fulfilling relationship I wouldn't be on Fab.
I'm here because I'm not all there
"I'm here becuse I'm not all there" very interesting statement but for amazing reasons and a clue to the key of your heart.
That key is well and truly in the dark, like that old Sufi parable, a holy man seen a guy looking around a lamp light, he's looking for his key under the lamp. Why look there he said, because it's bright...
Not everything that glitters is gold, or if you're buying a second hand fridge always go for the rusty ones
Words of wisdom no doubt, it is what is it
Interesting that the key was there all the time and not so difficult to find after all..
Yeah it was in the dark corner, sometimes the cure or treasure is in the dark or the sickness.
A bad relationship has strengthened many a man and woman who had the wisdom of knowing the difference and walked away and found their freedom and it's the simplest things in life that are most precious.
A relationship with myself through the dark nights of the soul is what got me out of the delusional that a relationship with someone else is the be all and end all
It's only the beginning if it happens, the end lol "
"the simplest things in life that are most precious"
Another interesting statement! But are you looking around the lamp?
Anyway, nature putrefies and thank God it does or there'd be lots of plants and animals lying around not putrifiing.
Instead there is rebirth.
I could call it 'deepening one's humanity'
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"What do you think the key to relationships is - try to have only one answer.."
One thing isn’t enough of an answer….
There are 3 things paramount to every relationship…
Truth
Loyalty
Security
In that order….
If you put loyalty first, you will never know if they are disloyal without knowing if they’ve been truthful to you .
If you have full trust and are loyal then security comes free…
Also in the fab world, it only works for couples if there is full honesty and no matter who they are fucking, that their mind is loyal to you, and you have the security of knowing that experiences won’t come between you
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I don't think it's possible to reduce it to a single answer. Relationships - any relationships - are complex. People are complex. "A successful relationship" can look very different to different people. |
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By *eijaWoman 46 weeks ago
City Centre |
Communication, connection, consideration, respect, loyalty, kindness but also laughter and fun.
Emotional intelligence is super important.
I'm a huge advocate of making time for each other /date nights no matter how busy you both are.
B x
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By *aseylee324Couple 46 weeks ago
Valley of Squinting Windows |
"I don't think it's possible to reduce it to a single answer. Relationships - any relationships - are complex. People are complex. "A successful relationship" can look very different to different people."
This is the truth of it, also, define "success" - both partners happy and satisfied? Or "didn't leave"? |
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Compatibility
It makes things so much easier I learned. Trying to shoe horn yourself into a relationship to make it work just doesn't. Not every relationship is meant to last forever as we change and grow. We do grow out of relationships and move on. |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"I don't think it's possible to reduce it to a single answer. Relationships - any relationships - are complex. People are complex. "A successful relationship" can look very different to different people."
From one thing, everything else flows.. |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Respect
Honesty
Trust
Consideration
Loads of sex is the most important. If you have the first 4 the sex will be amazing. "
Think about it, if there is no sex - may as well be squabbling siblings.
I wondered for a long time why some call it 'making love' but that's what happens - not for all of course but there is definitely deeper emotions towards each other if there is lots of sex. Ironically, sex leads to loving the other.. |
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"Respect
Honesty
Trust
Consideration
Loads of sex is the most important. If you have the first 4 the sex will be amazing.
Think about it, if there is no sex - may as well be squabbling siblings.
I wondered for a long time why some call it 'making love' but that's what happens - not for all of course but there is definitely deeper emotions towards each other if there is lots of sex. Ironically, sex leads to loving the other.."
Are you saying two people can't have sex regularly without feelings evolving? As in fuck buddies (hate that term btw) |
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By *ARTEN OP Man 46 weeks ago
Rostrevor |
"Respect
Honesty
Trust
Consideration
Loads of sex is the most important. If you have the first 4 the sex will be amazing.
Think about it, if there is no sex - may as well be squabbling siblings.
I wondered for a long time why some call it 'making love' but that's what happens - not for all of course but there is definitely deeper emotions towards each other if there is lots of sex. Ironically, sex leads to loving the other..
Are you saying two people can't have sex regularly without feelings evolving? As in fuck buddies (hate that term btw) "
Of course one can have fuck buddies if that's what they want.
But there's more pleasure when there are feelings. |
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"I don't think it's possible to reduce it to a single answer. Relationships - any relationships - are complex. People are complex. "A successful relationship" can look very different to different people.
From one thing, everything else flows.."
I don't agree at all |
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