I’m a single guy, new to this space and absolutely fascinated by the dynamics. Couples and women seem completely absolutely overwhelmed by all the messages they get from single guys. Whereas I imagine many single guys get little or no contact, especially if not verified etc. It’s seems all very pressured and frustrating for both sides.
I get the sense that everyone would benefit if newbie single guys could be given a quick lay of the land and some simple, basic rules to follow.
Beyond reading the profile (which no one seems to do) what would these be? |
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By *anUTV/TS
over a year ago
Rural |
Try post more on the forums, people might get a feel for you then if there's a gathering you could try to get an invitation by politely asking the organisers.
Your profile looks good and you have one verification already that's more than 99% of single guys.
You're off to a good start.
Being a paid up member always helps too |
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Most women and couples use filters to stop single men from messaging them and look for the men they want instead
So if someone has hundreds of unread messages then they want to have that many in the first place
Apart from that be yourself and don't change something to suit someone else |
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"Try post more on the forums, people might get a feel for you then if there's a gathering you could try to get an invitation by politely asking the organisers.
Your profile looks good and you have one verification already that's more than 99% of single guys.
You're off to a good start.
Being a paid up member always helps too"
Thanks, that’s all great advice. I should be clear I’m not bombarding folks with messages. All slow and respectful here, promise  Just very interested in the general dynamics and general advice that people would offer so as all could be better off |
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There have been numerous threads asking for or offering advice but the general consensus is that only a tiny percentage read or use the forums and even if those who did were to take the advice given all it does is help some people cover their tracks and avoid red flags.
Profile advice just creates carbon copy profiles full of boxticking lists that don't give a true impression of the person behind them.
Most people offering advice give a list of things to do and then add the line "just be yourself" which is ironic given they've just told them how to be anything but themselves. |
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I think it’s best that single men figure it out by themselves.
(It’s really not that complicated)
Writing a cheatsheet for single fellas will not stop the avalanche of DMs that women/couples get, furthermore it’ll make filtering the undesirables more difficult as the eijits will word their messages the same as decent fellas so you can’t tell what’s what. |
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Nothing wrong with asking for advice.
There is a difference between answering questions for genuine new members who don't understand how things work and just teaching people how to fake it.
Either way, guys who are faking it aren't going to get very far because if you start out thinking that seven pics of your cock and a one liner is the way to get a woman's attention then there's no help for you. I could shoot your photos and write your bio and you'd still turn up for a meet and behave just like the person you are and be none the richer, or wiser for it.
So in the final analysis I think I might as well try to help anyone who asks and the ones with enough cop on to make the most of it will and the ones who don't were never going to.
And make no mistake, there are plenty of guys on fab with blurry photos and badly written bio's that are still meeting people because their strengths lie in knowing how to approach people.
There's lots of ways to skin the cat on fab. If you can't even figure out one of them then even Aphrodite herself can't help you.
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Be a decent human being.
Be patient and resilient.
Understand that no reply is a reply. Only reach out to those who actually pique your interest.
Socials can be a great way to get to know people.
Fab can be a slow burn.
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Nothing wrong with asking for help, at all. 
(These AREN'T meant to be implied towards the OP. They're just some general help tips)
Have a verity of pictures on your profile(more than just cock pics or the likes).
Fill out your bio.
In other words, put an effort into your profile, in general.
Interact on the forum. If you want to & when you can.
Try to get to a social, even a pop up coffee social. It'll help you aswell. As nothing beats meeting new people & getting your name/face out there.
Ease off or even stop messaging other profiles, in general, unless it's something to do with the forum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't get many messages now because of my filters and my extensive block list. But my favourite messages are the ones are a bit of mischief or flirting rather than opening messages where I'm just a set of holes. For me personally the biggest organ I'm attracted to in a man is his brain but I won't complain if something else is large |
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My advice to anyone starting out is go to one or two socials and start meeting people there. Doesn't immediately have to involve sex but if you build up a good reputation it can't hurt your chances. The more people you know and get on with the more fun your likely to have.
If you pressure or pester people you will get shot down. An awful lot of the people here will be talking to each other and a reputation whether good or bad will follow you.
At the end of it all, treat people decently and if something happens, happy days. If not so be it  |
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