FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Us ladies have a tough time too
Us ladies have a tough time too
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I constantly see posts on here from lads basically stating how hard it is to get meets etc.
I was hoping to get a meet this weekend no joy given up.
Been chatting to a fella seemed nice verified etc.
Making arrangements etc then he bolted his excuse was my swinging scene back ground.
That’s his opinion at the end of the day not worried about his opinion.
It has however seriously put me off trying to set up a meet with a man not on the scene ever again.
The time waisting their refusal to meet for a quick coffee. Surely it would make sense to meet someone not only to see if there’s a vibe there but also for safety reasons.
Plus I think it’s fair to say the majority of women on fab who use it regularly are also on the scene.
I dunno what he’s doing on fab tbh. |
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By *ingpot!Man
over a year ago
West Cork |
AMEN
It can be so difficult for women and couples as well.. and of course the desperate moaning doesn't help a lad's chances.
Cannot understand for the life of me the slut shaming that some people go on about. Just go away if you can't handle swinging/non-monogamy/non-traditional relationships.
Sorry to hear you struggled with an uptight chancer OP.. you're awesome and gorgeous.. his fucking loss.
Respect xx
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His loss. Sure it's 'difficult' for a lad to get a reply on here but I'd rather get no reply immediately than to be stood up or dragged along.
You really wonder what goes on in some people's mind on here after a while |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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His loss sure ya were prob better off, he probably lacked in the personality department so presumed if he had a coffee with ya you'd be like thanks but no thanks  |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
So a man starts a thread about how difficult it is to get meets ...he gets abuse
A woman starts a thread on the same subject and the man she was going to meet gets the abuse
Thats fab for ya
Thats not a dig at the op by the way |
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"So a man starts a thread about how difficult it is to get meets ...he gets abuse
A woman starts a thread on the same subject and the man she was going to meet gets the abuse
Thats fab for ya
Thats not a dig at the op by the way "
I get what you're saying but I know Bob, she's a good woman. The guys who do the thread sometimes get constructive criticism and never return. |
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"So a man starts a thread about how difficult it is to get meets ...he gets abuse
A woman starts a thread on the same subject and the man she was going to meet gets the abuse
Thats fab for ya
Thats not a dig at the op by the way
I get what you're saying but I know Bob, she's a good woman. The guys who do the thread sometimes get constructive criticism and never return. "
come on now there's a difference between constructive criticism and down right abuse and we all have read the posts and said to ourselves that's not on . |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"So a man starts a thread about how difficult it is to get meets ...he gets abuse
A woman starts a thread on the same subject and the man she was going to meet gets the abuse
Thats fab for ya
Thats not a dig at the op by the way
I get what you're saying but I know Bob, she's a good woman. The guys who do the thread sometimes get constructive criticism and never return. "
As I said its not a dig at the op |
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"So a man starts a thread about how difficult it is to get meets ...he gets abuse
A woman starts a thread on the same subject and the man she was going to meet gets the abuse
Thats fab for ya
Thats not a dig at the op by the way
I get what you're saying but I know Bob, she's a good woman. The guys who do the thread sometimes get constructive criticism and never return. come on now there's a difference between constructive criticism and down right abuse and we all have read the posts and said to ourselves that's not on ."
A bit from column A, a bit from column B. I know i could definitely sound like a cunt on here sometimes but id be happy to help most on fab if they asked. And yes I know it's still double standards. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yes I know the posts where some lads ask for help.
Sometimes some of the answers are bloody horrific tbf.
All I wanted to do was high light here that ladies don’t have it as easy as everyone thanks we have it.
Quite a few ladies have private messaged me to say they have experienced situations by absolute time wasters and unfortunately this leaves a bad taste in our mouths. Which is a pity for genuine people just tryna have some sex.
Craic has seriously gone from fab not only on the page itself but swinging has changed too.
Fun and fuckig is not the main goals anymore.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"They don't always get constructive criticism either. The last guy got absolutely annihilated.
Sorry for your troubles OP.
Let's do shots at RVC"
See ya next week  |
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"Yes I know the posts where some lads ask for help.
Sometimes some of the answers are bloody horrific tbf.
All I wanted to do was high light here that ladies don’t have it as easy as everyone thanks we have it.
Quite a few ladies have private messaged me to say they have experienced situations by absolute time wasters and unfortunately this leaves a bad taste in our mouths. Which is a pity for genuine people just tryna have some sex.
Craic has seriously gone from fab not only on the page itself but swinging has changed too.
Fun and fuckig is not the main goals anymore.
"
ah in fairness there's still a bit of craic on here from time to time. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"Yes I know the posts where some lads ask for help.
Sometimes some of the answers are bloody horrific tbf.
All I wanted to do was high light here that ladies don’t have it as easy as everyone thanks we have it.
Quite a few ladies have private messaged me to say they have experienced situations by absolute time wasters and unfortunately this leaves a bad taste in our mouths. Which is a pity for genuine people just tryna have some sex.
Craic has seriously gone from fab not only on the page itself but swinging has changed too.
Fun and fuckig is not the main goals anymore.
"
I used to think that women and couples had it easy on here when I first started
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"I can't even get people to message me back not a mind cancel on me
Same as  your doing a lot better than me
I always say as I see it .. your a true gent great fun on the forum..
I agree."
aww thanks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"His loss hun, I get couples doing the same once I ask them both to verify.
Frustrating!
If you need a girls night out hit me up x"
Just a question?
You ask for them to verify yet you keep your veris hidden.
Verifications mean nothing to us unless we see where they come from.
What way do you look for couples to verify themselves?
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"His loss hun, I get couples doing the same once I ask them both to verify.
Frustrating!
If you need a girls night out hit me up x
Just a question?
You ask for them to verify yet you keep your veris hidden.
Verifications mean nothing to us unless we see where they come from.
What way do you look for couples to verify themselves?
"
When we DM I ask them to send a pic of them both to see if they are both there and I'll do the same, I usually never hear back |
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"Fair enough.
But we'd never send a pic to a profile like yours .
Not being smart but hidden veris mean nothing.
Hope the wedding is going well "
Turned on veris, never thought people would not get in touch over them.
Wedding is going shite but back in room now so fingers crossed, he likes to talk can I just say |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I know the posts where some lads ask for help.
Sometimes some of the answers are bloody horrific tbf.
All I wanted to do was high light here that ladies don’t have it as easy as everyone thanks we have it.
Quite a few ladies have private messaged me to say they have experienced situations by absolute time wasters and unfortunately this leaves a bad taste in our mouths. Which is a pity for genuine people just tryna have some sex.
Craic has seriously gone from fab not only on the page itself but swinging has changed too.
Fun and fuckig is not the main goals anymore.
"
Sorry about that, well women I message don’t even bother answer back! And engage in chat to see where can go |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fair enough.
But we'd never send a pic to a profile like yours .
Not being smart but hidden veris mean nothing.
Hope the wedding is going well
Turned on veris, never thought people would not get in touch over them.
Wedding is going shite but back in room now so fingers crossed, he likes to talk can I just say"
Weddings are usually shit . 
Read your verifications and tbh still wouldn't send a face pic based on them.
One veri hidden and the other meh.
But that's just us. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Surely it's not time wasting if he told you he changed his mind.Everyone is allowed to change their mind and shouldn't be seen as time wasters because they do. At least he has the decency to do that rather than agreeing to meet then not showing up.He did the right thing especially if he knew he didn't want it to go anywhere, why would be still want to meet for coffee it would be pointless for both of ye and that would definitely be time wasted.
And yes I agree it can be difficult to find people you get on with to meet and both want the same things regardless of gender . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Surely it's not time wasting if he told you he changed his mind.Everyone is allowed to change their mind and shouldn't be seen as time wasters because they do. At least he has the decency to do that rather than agreeing to meet then not showing up.He did the right thing especially if he knew he didn't want it to go anywhere, why would be still want to meet for coffee it would be pointless for both of ye and that would definitely be time wasted.
And yes I agree it can be difficult to find people you get on with to meet and both want the same things regardless of gender ."
Agree he is entitled to change his mind. My point is he was well up for it texting back and forth.
Had no issues asking for images videos etc (very intimate stuff btw) not talking my boobs now which I have no issues sharing but not with someone I haven’t met yet and once I put up the boundary about the content that’s when he started to taper off.
Now I’m not against content sharing I do my own thing. It’s now obvious this man was only photo hunting he got annoyed when I said no which I’m entitled to do as well so I do think he just waste my time.
It’s becoming more and more obvious that all sexes are having issues with meets right across the board now.
I don’t think that issue will ever disappear.
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By *1CorkCouple
over a year ago
Cork |
We don’t find it easy to get meets with local couples or single men (impossible with single women) that we’re attracted to, but guess we don’t have a right to find it easy either. We’re sure that by other’s standards/ expectations, we’re not easy to deal with (understatement perhaps) on organising meets.
Honesty in declining to meet at any juncture, regardless of the reason (we’ve heard some beauts), is infinitely better than being stood up.
Hope you bounce back and keep in mind the good when taking (/dealing with) the bad OP. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"Surely it's not time wasting if he told you he changed his mind.Everyone is allowed to change their mind and shouldn't be seen as time wasters because they do. At least he has the decency to do that rather than agreeing to meet then not showing up.He did the right thing especially if he knew he didn't want it to go anywhere, why would be still want to meet for coffee it would be pointless for both of ye and that would definitely be time wasted.
And yes I agree it can be difficult to find people you get on with to meet and both want the same things regardless of gender .
Agree he is entitled to change his mind. My point is he was well up for it texting back and forth.
Had no issues asking for images videos etc (very intimate stuff btw) not talking my boobs now which I have no issues sharing but not with someone I haven’t met yet and once I put up the boundary about the content that’s when he started to taper off.
Now I’m not against content sharing I do my own thing. It’s now obvious this man was only photo hunting he got annoyed when I said no which I’m entitled to do as well so I do think he just waste my time.
It’s becoming more and more obvious that all sexes are having issues with meets right across the board now.
I don’t think that issue will ever disappear.
"
Ah well if he was one of those pic hunters who pretend they want to meet but in truth are just looking for wank material then yes they are just wasting your time. I've had a few over the years like that and it's why I don't share pics in messages or do sex chat it tends to get rid of them quickly.
Ye I don't think fab will ever change but luckily there are people on here who do look for the sames things and it's what makes all the other crap worthwhile when you meet people who are on the same wavelength. |
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"We are always her for a social and more if we all click.
We to know how hard it is at times.
We are very easy going.
Fuck those wasters xxx
Contact us if you are interested x"
We highly recommend this couple   |
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By *ickin2Man
over a year ago
Kilkenny |
"I constantly see posts on here from lads basically stating how hard it is to get meets etc.
I was hoping to get a meet this weekend no joy given up.
Been chatting to a fella seemed nice verified etc.
Making arrangements etc then he bolted his excuse was my swinging scene back ground.
That’s his opinion at the end of the day not worried about his opinion.
It has however seriously put me off trying to set up a meet with a man not on the scene ever again.
The time waisting their refusal to meet for a quick coffee. Surely it would make sense to meet someone not only to see if there’s a vibe there but also for safety reasons.
Plus I think it’s fair to say the majority of women on fab who use it regularly are also on the scene.
I dunno what he’s doing on fab tbh. "
Hi. Absolutely and totally his loss. Also he judged you. Total lack of respect
Right now 300+ men online
1. Those that can not get verified
2. Coffee meet verified and get no
further
3. Verified after fun meet ups and still not happy
Right now 48 Ladies online
1. Drowning in messages good & bad
2. Not getting any messages
3. Being judged for whatever reason.
Not on here for years so I will say that I am a newbie in that sense.
Have made mistakes. Held my hand up and apologised.
Can totally understand a couple or the Ladies frustration. Hair , makeup, nails and clothing all in preparation and the build up of excitement for the meet up. Then a no show or last minute excuse or in this case to be judged. That is really nasty. I thought that Respect and good manners were the norm.
Been posting for awhile with 1 response.
Met just for dinner, further meetings followed and we ended up in the bedroom which was amazing. Outside of the we think completely different and don't always agree which is good and bad.
I can understand the frustration for everyone looking at a blank screen all night with no mail in the inbox. But to be judged is really rude and i think it shows the lack of respect he has for you and the lack of respect he has for himself. Maybe I am in your area sometime and we can meet for a coffee and a chat. Have a laugh and make you smile again. Will keep my Coffee Cup thread updated. We never know
Happy Fabbing everyone |
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Making photo verification mandatory would already go a long way towards keeping the numbers of zombie accounts down
As would making permanent bans actually permanent.
It's not difficult to do these things in a way that still protects privacy. Face pics can be removed automatically on request (this is bio metric data). And it's not hard to identify repeat accounts with a bit of effort.
I imagine the ad revenue from the tens of thousands of single male accounts far outways any projected income from paid subscriptions. Given the very reasonable membership rates I'd say the zombie ad views are already subsidizing the membership rates. |
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"Making photo verification mandatory would already go a long way towards keeping the numbers of zombie accounts down
As would making permanent bans actually permanent.
It's not difficult to do these things in a way that still protects privacy. Face pics can be removed automatically on request (this is bio metric data). And it's not hard to identify repeat accounts with a bit of effort.
I imagine the ad revenue from the tens of thousands of single male accounts far outways any projected income from paid subscriptions. Given the very reasonable membership rates I'd say the zombie ad views are already subsidizing the membership rates."
I think the zombie accounts will eventually kill the site and removing them in whatever way feasible makes good business sense in the long run. |
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"Making photo verification mandatory would already go a long way towards keeping the numbers of zombie accounts down
As would making permanent bans actually permanent.
It's not difficult to do these things in a way that still protects privacy. Face pics can be removed automatically on request (this is bio metric data). And it's not hard to identify repeat accounts with a bit of effort.
I imagine the ad revenue from the tens of thousands of single male accounts far outways any projected income from paid subscriptions. Given the very reasonable membership rates I'd say the zombie ad views are already subsidizing the membership rates.
I think the zombie accounts will eventually kill the site and removing them in whatever way feasible makes good business sense in the long run."
I agree with you there. |
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We've been let down by single males more than any other type of profiles. We even had a guy initiate all contacts and messages then when it came to the day if the meet we were ghosted. We've also heard every last minute excuse there is. Anyway... we will keep on going |
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By *ind PaddyMan
over a year ago
South County Dublin |
"I constantly see posts on here from lads basically stating how hard it is to get meets etc.
I was hoping to get a meet this weekend no joy given up.
Been chatting to a fella seemed nice verified etc.
Making arrangements etc then he bolted his excuse was my swinging scene back ground.
That’s his opinion at the end of the day not worried about his opinion.
It has however seriously put me off trying to set up a meet with a man not on the scene ever again.
The time waisting their refusal to meet for a quick coffee. Surely it would make sense to meet someone not only to see if there’s a vibe there but also for safety reasons.
Plus I think it’s fair to say the majority of women on fab who use it regularly are also on the scene.
I dunno what he’s doing on fab tbh. "
Well if you were to arrange a coffee date with me sometime I would turn up |
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