FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Male and female toilet attendance
Male and female toilet attendance
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I'm seeing many public toilets (shopping centres/airport)with signs up saying male or female attendants could be cleaning/servicing this toilet.
I have (Mr) on several occasions, walked in while a lady is cleaning or caught short in mid flow as a female attendant comes in .
Just wondering what's the lads options on this and lady's, would you be happy to see a male attendance walk in when you are using the facilities?
Sometimes the toilets are closed off while cleaning is done but I've found it's more of the above.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I'm seeing many public toilets (shopping centres/airport)with signs up saying male or female attendants could be cleaning/servicing this toilet.
I have (Mr) on several occasions, walked in while a lady is cleaning or caught short in mid flow as a female attendant comes in .
Just wondering what's the lads options on this and lady's, would you be happy to see a male attendance walk in when you are using the facilities?
Sometimes the toilets are closed off while cleaning is done but I've found it's more of the above.
"
No issue often happens in applegreen- we need to go gender neutral and move with the times |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
They don't seem to mind abroad when you're standing at a single urinal and they mop around your feet
I once had a female cleaner in Disneyland Paris stand beside until I finished and shake  so she could clean up |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So all positive feedback so far.
Thing is when I walked in ,the female attendant was chatting to a male attendance at the urinals.
So I waited for a cubicle to be free.
As I was waiting 5 more guys walked in, stopped,looked and joined me waiting for a free cubicle.
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"They don't seem to mind abroad when you're standing at a single urinal and they mop around your feet
I once had a female cleaner in Disneyland Paris stand beside until I finished and shake so she could clean up "
Clean up? Did you spill a bit?  |
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By *0emMan
over a year ago
My Town |
Seems to be the norm especially in Dublin airport they just drift in do their thing and leave same abroad it’s the attendants I don’t like I mean I can wash my own hands and no I don’t want a squirt of cheap cologne or lynx thanks |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"They don't seem to mind abroad when you're standing at a single urinal and they mop around your feet
I once had a female cleaner in Disneyland Paris stand beside until I finished and shake so she could clean up
Clean up? Did you spill a bit? "
Ha ha ....only when I sent it did I realise what I wrote |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
So has anyone been in the male toilets in croke park at a gig
The women running in to get the cubicles because the queues in the ladies are around the block
Its a bit like fab....most men just finish their pee but there's already a few that turn around and wave |
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"So has anyone been in the male toilets in croke park at a gig
The women running in to get the cubicles because the queues in the ladies are around the block
Its a bit like fab....most men just finish their pee but there's already a few that turn around and wave "
Not in Croke park but saw that a few times at Ulster finals in Clones.
One guy asked a guard what would happen if he was to run into the ladies and was told to try it if he didn't want to see the match because he would be locked up. |
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"So has anyone been in the male toilets in croke park at a gig
The women running in to get the cubicles because the queues in the ladies are around the block
Its a bit like fab....most men just finish their pee but there's already a few that turn around and wave "
If I was a female it wouldn’t be a place I’d be rushing into  |
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Never use the public toilets in Applegreen! They have a sign on the door saying "Only toilet paper may be flushed down the toilet!"
I spent ages wandering around the store holding my turd, looking for somewhere to bin it. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"Never use the public toilets in Applegreen! They have a sign on the door saying "Only toilet paper may be flushed down the toilet!"
I spent ages wandering around the store holding my turd, looking for somewhere to bin it."
Did you not stomp it down in a truckers shower |
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Last Sunday we went out for a few pints.
I went to the bathroom and the only stall that was free had throw up all over it. I just went to gents, done my business and went back out.
Let the staff know about the bathroom disaster and carried on with my night.
Gents didn't mind, I didn't mind, staff... well... poor staff had to deal with the mess someone created and didn't bother cleaning after themselves.
Missus |
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"It's a wonder the anti woke mob haven't expressed outrage about it yet .."
Well call me anti woke then... don't bother me, but an attendant is working, same as a nurse or doctor or carer & thats their job.. & u are somewhat giving them consent to be in your personal space if you want to use their facilities..
Someone caught, as another poster put where their toilet was unusable, then as long as they are respectful then that's fine too..
A gender neutral bathroom then I would expect both men & women to use it & being aware of that makes it OK because Of the awareness & I would naturally be on guard for myself same as I wouldn't walk down the street alone at night because I'm a woman.
But I don't feel comfortable with (especially a man) being in a woman's private space where they can easily over power her.. for me I'd like to think I'd be fine but wouldn't want my young daughter in that situation.
As a woman we have to naturally be on guard for our safety all the time.. its not cool but its the way of the world..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t care more or less about anybodys gender, but it’s hard to know if that person is genuine or not and that what is most important for me, just imagine what a male ( who call himself a lady) go into a female toilet where could be no one else only unattended chid…….( I think I no need to explain what can happen)So for a safety and privacy of our kids and women I say I do care who go into ladies bathroom. Suggestion is easy build nonebio toilets , so everyone happy and safe . You can agree or disagree with me but kids and there safety will come first for me anything else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a wonder the anti woke mob haven't expressed outrage about it yet ..
Well call me anti woke then... don't bother me, but an attendant is working, same as a nurse or doctor or carer & thats their job.. & u are somewhat giving them consent to be in your personal space if you want to use their facilities..
Someone caught, as another poster put where their toilet was unusable, then as long as they are respectful then that's fine too..
A gender neutral bathroom then I would expect both men & women to use it & being aware of that makes it OK because Of the awareness & I would naturally be on guard for myself same as I wouldn't walk down the street alone at night because I'm a woman.
But I don't feel comfortable with (especially a man) being in a woman's private space where they can easily over power her.. for me I'd like to think I'd be fine but wouldn't want my young daughter in that situation.
As a woman we have to naturally be on guard for our safety all the time.. its not cool but its the way of the world..
"
Completely agree with you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Gender neutral toilets are a great idea until someone’s kid is assaulted by somebody… women should be at the very least going to the bathroom with females only I know everyone wants to be on the equality train but let’s be real |
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"I'm surprised about the gender separation of toilets in general, though I find it quite ingrained in our society. Gender neutral conveniences make more sense to me personally."
I think it's ingrained in every society. It's not just an Irish / European thing.
As a man I don't worry about this stuff AT ALL. But I do understand that that's part of male privilege and that women have to be more aware of their safety. I wonder if there are safeguards that can be put in place to make women more comfortable in unified toilets.
We were at a festival earlier in the year and spent 4 nights sharing toilet facilities and 200,000 people didn't seem to have any issues using the same loos. Maybe they did and just didn't complain. Laura coped fine. I don't know |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Gender neutral toilets are a great idea until someone’s kid is assaulted by somebody… women should be at the very least going to the bathroom with females only I know everyone wants to be on the equality train but let’s be real "
This days some people far away from the reality  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Gender neutral toilets are a great idea until someone’s kid is assaulted by somebody… women should be at the very least going to the bathroom with females only I know everyone wants to be on the equality train but let’s be real
This days some people far away from the reality "
Well this is it everything is all Rosie in the garden until sexual assaults occur in a regular basis and it becomes a growing statistic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Gender neutral toilets are a great idea until someone’s kid is assaulted by somebody… women should be at the very least going to the bathroom with females only I know everyone wants to be on the equality train but let’s be real
This days some people far away from the reality
Well this is it everything is all Rosie in the garden until sexual assaults occur in a regular basis and it becomes a growing statistic "
Then it would be too late as many kids and women’s mental health will be destroyed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Gender neutral toilets are a great idea until someone’s kid is assaulted by somebody… women should be at the very least going to the bathroom with females only I know everyone wants to be on the equality train but let’s be real
This days some people far away from the reality
Without a shadow of a doubt
Well this is it everything is all Rosie in the garden until sexual assaults occur in a regular basis and it becomes a growing statistic
Then it would be too late as many kids and women’s mental health will be destroyed "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent. |
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent."
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
"
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers. |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers. "
Many a good time was had in loos specially at the round O enniskillen , Never seen Attended on working there |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers. "
One thing is to wear a dress and completely another use it as an excuse to get to women bathroom where is the balance now . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers.
One thing is to wear a dress and completely another use it as an excuse to get to women bathroom where is the balance now . "
Does this happen often? I mean, beyond isolated incidents, is there a precedent? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Guys.this has clearly strayed from the question I asked lol.
But it clear the lady's and guys on fab don't have a problem with the opposite sex attendance being in the restroom when they are using them.
But most vanilla lady's I spoke with would have a problem with a male attendance and obviously vanilla guys also as they all queued up for the cubicles.
One bar in Dublin (can remember the name) is unisex and Mrs doesn't like going in alone without a side kick.
Then again that's all women need a girl pal when using the loo don't they
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers.
One thing is to wear a dress and completely another use it as an excuse to get to women bathroom where is the balance now .
Does this happen often? I mean, beyond isolated incidents, is there a precedent?"
One assaulted child or a woman it is enough to be “often” . I don’t care who wears what it’s none of my business, but any potential danger to kids or women any age is an issue for me. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
I think we can all agree that the safety of children and women comes first
However I definitely disagree with the idea of a random bloke in a dress using it as an excuse to attack children and women in ladies toilets ...In my job of over 15 years dealing with millions of customers at gigs its never happened
In fact women in the main are very polite and encouraging when at gigs with a lots of men transitioning and chat to them in the Queue as normal
It wasn't too long ago that men in dresses were R*ping children left right and centre under the guise of religion and even now the far right are making up shite to attack liberies and books to help go back to that way of living
No thanks
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that those who say transwomen shouldn't be using female toilets don't seem to have the same issue with male attendants cleaning female toilets.
Which leads me to believe that their concern is not to do with safety for women at all and more to do with demonising a minority.
Like at least be consistent.
Absolutely not in my case. Attendants are working for a company & can be traced. A random bloke wearing a dress is a different story.
Sweet jesus. Someone transitioning is not a random bloke wearing a dress. Or, for balance, a random woman wearing trousers.
One thing is to wear a dress and completely another use it as an excuse to get to women bathroom where is the balance now .
Does this happen often? I mean, beyond isolated incidents, is there a precedent?
One assaulted child or a woman it is enough to be “often” . I don’t care who wears what it’s none of my business, but any potential danger to kids or women any age is an issue for me. "
Do we demonise an entire demographic for that though? Because I can't think of any other situation where we do that |
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I was in the changing rooms at the local swimming pool 20 years ago. It was just an open room with no cubicles and a single swing door access from the reception.
A woman walked in with her son who was about 8 or 9 and proceeded to get him changed.
Everyone there shouted at her to get out and she refused saying she was within her rights.
Some men went to reception to complain dressed in just a towel and the staff said there was nothing they could do as it was a child protection issue.
One man said his young daughter was in the womens changing room and he was going in to check on her.
The staff told him they would call the police if he carried out his threat and that kicked off big time with others asking what was the difference if it was a child protection issue?
Police were eventually called to calm everyone down but when they opened new facilities with a communal changing area and all cubicles a few years later there was a protest from some a womens rights group demanding separate facilities.
You'll never keep everyone happy no matter what you do.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I was in the changing rooms at the local swimming pool 20 years ago. It was just an open room with no cubicles and a single swing door access from the reception.
A woman walked in with her son who was about 8 or 9 and proceeded to get him changed.
Everyone there shouted at her to get out and she refused saying she was within her rights.
Some men went to reception to complain dressed in just a towel and the staff said there was nothing they could do as it was a child protection issue.
One man said his young daughter was in the womens changing room and he was going in to check on her.
The staff told him they would call the police if he carried out his threat and that kicked off big time with others asking what was the difference if it was a child protection issue?
Police were eventually called to calm everyone down but when they opened new facilities with a communal changing area and all cubicles a few years later there was a protest from some a womens rights group demanding separate facilities.
You'll never keep everyone happy no matter what you do.
"
I've been in the men's changing rooms at the gym when a father had his daughters in getting undressed or dressed after the pool.girls maybe up to 8/10 years old.
I'm sorry but hell no for all concerned |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If pears going to assault they are going to assault and there’s actually very little anyone can do about it. The fact is we should not be going around infantilising women as the weaker sex or demonising guys as all being threats to society.
Gender neutral toilets are actually safer because they have more footfall with ‘everyone’ going in and really if we are worried about a child getting hurt/going missing then they shouldn’t be going into a toilet alone anyway. They could be groomed away from any toilet male/female when it comes to child trafficking.
Gender neutral toilet’s don’t need urinals so they can have a safe private space for all concerned to do their business. What’s more it allows families / parents to be together without discrimination from Karen’s offended by fathers changing the nappies of kids in sexist bathrooms that assume it is only ‘women’s’ work to look after the toileting needs of kids.
Gender neutral toilets also make it safer for transitioning people giving them a safe space to just be.
What’s more we are cutting down walls between cubicles in ladies so they can go together- the idea that women aren’t comfortable to go to a gender neutral toilet on their own is an excuse for many tbh - the needs must creation of double / twin toilets in pubs / clubs is proof of this.
We are all human - there’s my schpeak for the day - now pass me the good coffee till I waken up properly lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Toilets and changing rooms are two different things so I would agree here. We have cubicle only changing room so it caters for everyone these are the kinds of changes needed to make things work. By having one large changing area more cubicles can be accommodated do it works out better for everyone. |
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"If pears going to assault they are going to assault and there’s actually very little anyone can do about it. The fact is we should not be going around infantilising women as the weaker sex or demonising guys as all being threats to society.
Gender neutral toilets are actually safer because they have more footfall with ‘everyone’ going in and really if we are worried about a child getting hurt/going missing then they shouldn’t be going into a toilet alone anyway. They could be groomed away from any toilet male/female when it comes to child trafficking.
Gender neutral toilet’s don’t need urinals so they can have a safe private space for all concerned to do their business. What’s more it allows families / parents to be together without discrimination from Karen’s offended by fathers changing the nappies of kids in sexist bathrooms that assume it is only ‘women’s’ work to look after the toileting needs of kids.
Gender neutral toilets also make it safer for transitioning people giving them a safe space to just be.
What’s more we are cutting down walls between cubicles in ladies so they can go together- the idea that women aren’t comfortable to go to a gender neutral toilet on their own is an excuse for many tbh - the needs must creation of double / twin toilets in pubs / clubs is proof of this.
We are all human - there’s my schpeak for the day - now pass me the good coffee till I waken up properly lol"
Well said. I hope the sanity in this post reaches when the most blinkered of contributers to this thread |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And I cannot wait for the next time I bleed through my clothes & have to rince my blood soaked clothes in front of male privileged audience. But my feelings as a woman are irrelevant..
"
In a gender neutral toilet there would be more room for toilets with disability access that include sinks. I have endo so this happens me regularly. My feelings as a women are that I am already accessing gender neutral accessible toilets to accommodate the so don’t see the problem really.
Less division creates more space for everyone. |
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"And I cannot wait for the next time I bleed through my clothes & have to rince my blood soaked clothes in front of male privileged audience. But my feelings as a woman are irrelevant..
"
I can't wait for the next time I need to scutter up a toilet bowl with a female privileged audience listening/smelling next to me.
But my feelings as a man are irrelevant. |
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The move towards gender neutral bathrooms isn't being driven by men or coming from a place of any kind of privilege.
It's a complicated and triggering subject that requires lot of sensitivity and learning particular in the case of youth/trans/women's health and their security. Those are real life issues.
Taking pop shots a men in general and transphobic alarmism only serve to enflame an already tricky dialogue.
Statistical information on rates of incidents in areas such as public toilets are readily available.
It's going to be a another ten or twenty years before any really substantive data exists to review the large scale effects of moving towards gender neutrality in public spaces are known but there are plenty of interesting studies already available
Education is always the answer in cases where culture, religion and institutionalised social social norms are being challenged for better or worse.
Heres some light reading for anyone interested in educating themselves on the subject.
Published studies:
Gender-Neutral Toilets: A Qualitative Exploration of Inclusive School Environments for Sexuality and Gender Diverse Youth in Western Australia
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Transgender teens with restricted bathroom access at higher risk of sexual assault
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The ‘Online Othering’ of Transgender People in Relation to ‘Gender Neutral Toilets’
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The move towards gender neutral bathrooms isn't being driven by men or coming from a place of any kind of privilege.
It's a complicated and triggering subject that requires lot of sensitivity and learning particular in the case of youth/trans/women's health and their security. Those are real life issues.
Taking pop shots a men in general and transphobic alarmism only serve to enflame an already tricky dialogue.
Statistical information on rates of incidents in areas such as public toilets are readily available.
It's going to be a another ten or twenty years before any really substantive data exists to review the large scale effects of moving towards gender neutrality in public spaces are known but there are plenty of interesting studies already available
Education is always the answer in cases where culture, religion and institutionalised social social norms are being challenged for better or worse.
Heres some light reading for anyone interested in educating themselves on the subject.
Published studies:
Gender-Neutral Toilets: A Qualitative Exploration of Inclusive School Environments for Sexuality and Gender Diverse Youth in Western Australia
---
Transgender teens with restricted bathroom access at higher risk of sexual assault
---
The ‘Online Othering’ of Transgender People in Relation to ‘Gender Neutral Toilets’
"
Agree - and thanks for the research based information x |
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"The move towards gender neutral bathrooms isn't being driven by men or coming from a place of any kind of privilege.
It's a complicated and triggering subject that requires lot of sensitivity and learning particular in the case of youth/trans/women's health and their security. Those are real life issues.
Taking pop shots a men in general and transphobic alarmism only serve to enflame an already tricky dialogue.
Statistical information on rates of incidents in areas such as public toilets are readily available.
It's going to be a another ten or twenty years before any really substantive data exists to review the large scale effects of moving towards gender neutrality in public spaces are known but there are plenty of interesting studies already available
Education is always the answer in cases where culture, religion and institutionalised social social norms are being challenged for better or worse.
Heres some light reading for anyone interested in educating themselves on the subject.
Published studies:
Gender-Neutral Toilets: A Qualitative Exploration of Inclusive School Environments for Sexuality and Gender Diverse Youth in Western Australia
---
Transgender teens with restricted bathroom access at higher risk of sexual assault
---
The ‘Online Othering’ of Transgender People in Relation to ‘Gender Neutral Toilets’
"
Completely agree! |
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A friend of mine who passed away 3 weeks ago used to laugh 30 years ago when he went to a particular GAA club as part of his job and the cleaner was there to let him in.
If he used the gents when he was there she always seemed to follow him in with the mop bucket and continue her conversation as he was at the urinal.
He was in his 50s at that stage and she was late 60s.
He went in one day and there was a new cleaner and when he asked if she had retired he was told no that the club had to get rid of her following so many complaints about following workmen and even young players into the toilets and changing rooms.
He thought it funny at the time because of his experiences but when he heard she did it deliberately to so many young people he didn't see the funny side anymore. |
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