FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Married/relationship/child life v single life
Married/relationship/child life v single life
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"Being single your life is all about yourself. Having a partner and kids and you mostly have to think about somebody else.
"
exactly. Single life you don’t have to answer to anybody or think about anybody else etc |
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Bonuses of being single:
*You seem to have lots of free time for hobbies, travelling etc.
*you're generally slimmer as singles don't usually bother cooking
*chores are minimal - it's very easy not to mess up your living space hence its also easy to clean it.
*sex is great
Negatives of being single:
*sometimes you want to share how your day went with someone without bothering friends.
*you're always broke (renting a home and supporting yourself on a single income is brutally expensive)
Benefits of being in a relationship:
*you have your best friend always by your side to share the good and the bad with
*sex is great
*you have stability and that special person to come home to
*dual income provides a better financial security for both
Negatives of being in a relationship:
*you put on weight
*you fall into a routine
*you have to consider your other halfs feelings
*extra chores at home
Positives of being child free:
*extra sleep
*extra money
*general happiness
*better mental health
*extra free time
*no stupid questions
*no added stress
*no babysitters to worry about
*holidays abroad at any time of the year
*no added responsibilities
*no never ending chores
*clean home
I could genuinely go on forever and ever...
Negatives of being child free:
*workmates who have kids assume that they're entitled to your free time when it comes to covering their shifts that fall into anti social/off school hours. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Responsibilities...easy tbh..those who live a single life have less responsibilities than those in a relationship or have kids ..NB.please note there are those that are in a relationship or have kids BUT they still think they are single... assholes. |
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"Responsibilities...easy tbh..those who live a single life have less responsibilities than those in a relationship or have kids ..NB.please note there are those that are in a relationship or have kids BUT they still think they are single... assholes."
I have a friend who got married at Xmas. He was with his gf for 8 years or more. Since he’s gotten married his life has totally changed. We have a lads group chat and he gets slagged, all good banter but how his life has changed from been in a relationship to married is crazy.
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By *oudicaWoman
over a year ago
Kilkenny |
Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story. |
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story. "
deffo true but I think the point been made is without a gf/wife/kids, you can think of just yourself a lot more. Some do have aging parents living with serious ailments at home who need looking after. You’re blessed in that regard if there’s a few brothers/ sisters there who might take turns in the workload. I’m kinda just thinking out loud on the basic life difference of a single person to one who’s attached/has kids. |
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story. "
True, but don't forget that people with families have the same additional responsibilities you're talking about, PLUS the responsibility for kids and normal family life on top. I've ageing parents with health issues PLUS 5 kids and a business to run. Time for me is nearly zero. |
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story. "
I would agree. My sister isn't married and doesn't have kids. She lives at home with my elderly parents to help them as needed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story.
True, but don't forget that people with families have the same additional responsibilities you're talking about, PLUS the responsibility for kids and normal family life on top. I've ageing parents with health issues PLUS 5 kids and a business to run. Time for me is nearly zero. "
Yup, I got to single parent my 3 kids, work full-time and look after both my parents while my childfree only sibling did nothing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story. "
Totally agree with this, as a full time dad to two kids and running a business I hate to think where I'd be without my sisters and my parents, I never have to ask they are just always there, and my kids are the better of it , I'm lucky though we all live close together and in the countryside |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not a competition though, everyone has challenges in their life.
I have to wonder OP, you've started threads like this more than once. Are you doubting your life choices? Every situation has positives and negatives. |
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"Bonuses of being single:
*You seem to have lots of free time for hobbies, travelling etc.
*you're generally slimmer as singles don't usually bother cooking
*chores are minimal - it's very easy not to mess up your living space hence its also easy to clean it.
*sex is great
Negatives of being single:
*sometimes you want to share how your day went with someone without bothering friends.
*you're always broke (renting a home and supporting yourself on a single income is brutally expensive)
Benefits of being in a relationship:
*you have your best friend always by your side to share the good and the bad with
*sex is great
*you have stability and that special person to come home to
*dual income provides a better financial security for both
Negatives of being in a relationship:
*you put on weight
*you fall into a routine
*you have to consider your other halfs feelings
*extra chores at home
Positives of being child free:
*extra sleep
*extra money
*general happiness
*better mental health
*extra free time
*no stupid questions
*no added stress
*no babysitters to worry about
*holidays abroad at any time of the year
*no added responsibilities
*no never ending chores
*clean home
I could genuinely go on forever and ever...
Negatives of being child free:
*workmates who have kids assume that they're entitled to your free time when it comes to covering their shifts that fall into anti social/off school hours. "
I laughed so hard on your positives of being child free section. Especially when it came to “general happiness” lol!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A positive of having children, one that I think people may underestimate -
It gives you a much greater level of connection in your local community and makes it much easier to meet new people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Also, it's not a guarantee, but you're much more likely to have people who give a shit about you when you're elderly and vulnerable yourself. As we live longer lives with greater disconnect from other humans, this is going to be crucial to quality of life in old age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe there's positives and negatives in every situation that we all look at differently and there's no ideal solution
So its up to us to work through everything that life throws at us anyway
"
Absolutely, we make our choices and as responsible individuals, we accept the consequences.  |
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"It's not a competition though, everyone has challenges in their life.
I have to wonder OP, you've started threads like this more than once. Are you doubting your life choices? Every situation has positives and negatives."
thankfully not. It’s like I said in the OP, you choose the life you have in most situations. I’m single, work and have involvements out of work in a voluntary style. I wouldn’t change any of it. I could change eventually but very happy for now. Besides work, I can do as I please. I love having the life where I have no full on commitments. |
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Definatly a negative of been married , going by the situations I see at times, is some women eventually get to wear the trousers lol 
Positivity of kids? Keep you grounded, has you involved in stuff as they get older etc
Negativity? Your life is consumed, constantly on the go. Lots has to be pre arranged/ planned in advance |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"Responsibilities...easy tbh..those who live a single life have less responsibilities than those in a relationship or have kids ..NB.please note there are those that are in a relationship or have kids BUT they still think they are single... assholes.I have a friend who got married at Xmas. He was with his gf for 8 years or more. Since he’s gotten married his life has totally changed. We have a lads group chat and he gets slagged, all good banter but how his life has changed from been in a relationship to married is crazy. "
It's the curse called 'marriage',the devil must have had his own twist on it when it was invented.  It's bizarre really the wedding is labelled as 'best day of my life', yet it seems a portal to misery or why would people go mad on hen and stag parties like there's no tomorrow?  |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
On this note, maybe someone knows this on here, something that I find mind-boggling unless I got that wrong...
I've noticed that there's no civil partnership possibility anymore for hetero couples. The Irish government got rid of it in 2016 I think.
So if as hetero couple you want to avail of the financial securities/advantages a state provides you've to be married. While homosexual couples have both possibilities, civil partnership and marriage |
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"On this note, maybe someone knows this on here, something that I find mind-boggling unless I got that wrong...
I've noticed that there's no civil partnership possibility anymore for hetero couples. The Irish government got rid of it in 2016 I think.
So if as hetero couple you want to avail of the financial securities/advantages a state provides you've to be married. While homosexual couples have both possibilities, civil partnership and marriage "
Following the commencement of the Marriage Act 2015 on 16 November 2015, you can no longer register a civil partnership in Ireland. Couples already in a civil partnership can apply to marry or remain as they are. If you decide to marry, your civil partnership is automatically dissolved.
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"On this note, maybe someone knows this on here, something that I find mind-boggling unless I got that wrong...
I've noticed that there's no civil partnership possibility anymore for hetero couples. The Irish government got rid of it in 2016 I think.
So if as hetero couple you want to avail of the financial securities/advantages a state provides you've to be married. While homosexual couples have both possibilities, civil partnership and marriage
Following the commencement of the Marriage Act 2015 on 16 November 2015, you can no longer register a civil partnership in Ireland. Couples already in a civil partnership can apply to marry or remain as they are. If you decide to marry, your civil partnership is automatically dissolved.
"
Thank you OP, I know how to Google myself and I've came across that a while ago.
Still find it hard to believe that same sex couples have now two options while opposite sex couples have only the one. Where's the equality in that? |
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"On this note, maybe someone knows this on here, something that I find mind-boggling unless I got that wrong...
I've noticed that there's no civil partnership possibility anymore for hetero couples. The Irish government got rid of it in 2016 I think.
So if as hetero couple you want to avail of the financial securities/advantages a state provides you've to be married. While homosexual couples have both possibilities, civil partnership and marriage
Following the commencement of the Marriage Act 2015 on 16 November 2015, you can no longer register a civil partnership in Ireland. Couples already in a civil partnership can apply to marry or remain as they are. If you decide to marry, your civil partnership is automatically dissolved.
Thank you OP, I know how to Google myself and I've came across that a while ago.
Still find it hard to believe that same sex couples have now two options while opposite sex couples have only the one. Where's the equality in that? "
it says somewhere that marriage was always available to opposite sex couples so didn’t need the civil partnership. |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"On this note, maybe someone knows this on here, something that I find mind-boggling unless I got that wrong...
I've noticed that there's no civil partnership possibility anymore for hetero couples. The Irish government got rid of it in 2016 I think.
So if as hetero couple you want to avail of the financial securities/advantages a state provides you've to be married. While homosexual couples have both possibilities, civil partnership and marriage
Following the commencement of the Marriage Act 2015 on 16 November 2015, you can no longer register a civil partnership in Ireland. Couples already in a civil partnership can apply to marry or remain as they are. If you decide to marry, your civil partnership is automatically dissolved.
Thank you OP, I know how to Google myself and I've came across that a while ago.
Still find it hard to believe that same sex couples have now two options while opposite sex couples have only the one. Where's the equality in that? it says somewhere that marriage was always available to opposite sex couples so didn’t need the civil partnership. "
There's a fair difference between the two and I don't think people should be forced into marriage just to avoid ie huge tax implications when owning a house together and one of them dies. |
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"Bonuses of being single:
*You seem to have lots of free time for hobbies, travelling etc.
*you're generally slimmer as singles don't usually bother cooking
*chores are minimal - it's very easy not to mess up your living space hence its also easy to clean it.
*sex is great
Negatives of being single:
*sometimes you want to share how your day went with someone without bothering friends.
*you're always broke (renting a home and supporting yourself on a single income is brutally expensive)
Benefits of being in a relationship:
*you have your best friend always by your side to share the good and the bad with
*sex is great
*you have stability and that special person to come home to
*dual income provides a better financial security for both
Negatives of being in a relationship:
*you put on weight
*you fall into a routine
*you have to consider your other halfs feelings
*extra chores at home
Positives of being child free:
*extra sleep
*extra money
*general happiness
*better mental health
*extra free time
*no stupid questions
*no added stress
*no babysitters to worry about
*holidays abroad at any time of the year
*no added responsibilities
*no never ending chores
*clean home
I could genuinely go on forever and ever...
Negatives of being child free:
*workmates who have kids assume that they're entitled to your free time when it comes to covering their shifts that fall into anti social/off school hours. "
Sweeping generalisations, many hilariously inaccurate... clean home LOL |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"What’s the biggest diff between civil partnership and marriage? "
Biggest difference is no vows or religious entanglement in civil partnership, you're not becoming wife and husband. It's a registered commitment to your partner that gives you financially the same advantages as a married couple.
The process of ending it is different, don't ask me about details, I'm not a lawyer. |
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"What’s the biggest diff between civil partnership and marriage?
Biggest difference is no vows or religious entanglement in civil partnership, you're not becoming wife and husband. It's a registered commitment to your partner that gives you financially the same advantages as a married couple.
The process of ending it is different, don't ask me about details, I'm not a lawyer. "
|
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"Bonuses of being single:
*You seem to have lots of free time for hobbies, travelling etc.
*you're generally slimmer as singles don't usually bother cooking
*chores are minimal - it's very easy not to mess up your living space hence its also easy to clean it.
*sex is great
Negatives of being single:
*sometimes you want to share how your day went with someone without bothering friends.
*you're always broke (renting a home and supporting yourself on a single income is brutally expensive)
Benefits of being in a relationship:
*you have your best friend always by your side to share the good and the bad with
*sex is great
*you have stability and that special person to come home to
*dual income provides a better financial security for both
Negatives of being in a relationship:
*you put on weight
*you fall into a routine
*you have to consider your other halfs feelings
*extra chores at home
Positives of being child free:
*extra sleep
*extra money
*general happiness
*better mental health
*extra free time
*no stupid questions
*no added stress
*no babysitters to worry about
*holidays abroad at any time of the year
*no added responsibilities
*no never ending chores
*clean home
I could genuinely go on forever and ever...
Negatives of being child free:
*workmates who have kids assume that they're entitled to your free time when it comes to covering their shifts that fall into anti social/off school hours.
Sweeping generalisations, many hilariously inaccurate... clean home LOL"
We would agree |
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"Bonuses of being single:
*You seem to have lots of free time for hobbies, travelling etc.
*you're generally slimmer as singles don't usually bother cooking
*chores are minimal - it's very easy not to mess up your living space hence its also easy to clean it.
*sex is great
Negatives of being single:
*sometimes you want to share how your day went with someone without bothering friends.
*you're always broke (renting a home and supporting yourself on a single income is brutally expensive)
Benefits of being in a relationship:
*you have your best friend always by your side to share the good and the bad with
*sex is great
*you have stability and that special person to come home to
*dual income provides a better financial security for both
Negatives of being in a relationship:
*you put on weight
*you fall into a routine
*you have to consider your other halfs feelings
*extra chores at home
Positives of being child free:
*extra sleep
*extra money
*general happiness
*better mental health
*extra free time
*no stupid questions
*no added stress
*no babysitters to worry about
*holidays abroad at any time of the year
*no added responsibilities
*no never ending chores
*clean home
I could genuinely go on forever and ever...
Negatives of being child free:
*workmates who have kids assume that they're entitled to your free time when it comes to covering their shifts that fall into anti social/off school hours.
Sweeping generalisations, many hilariously inaccurate... clean home LOL"
What's relevant to me personally doesn't have to apply to you.
And yes, kids are messy creatures who create a mess just by breathing, so yeah clean home does apply to me. Doesn't have to apply to you, not sure what's your problem with that lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Saying that because someone is single and child free that they don’t have responsibilities or don’t have to think of anyone else is quite offensive to be honest.
Many of us have to take on additional wider family responsibilities/expectations just because we are single without children, particularly with regards to aging parents/relatives. You’ll find that quite often it’s those siblings who are expected to do a lot of that heavy lifting because “sure what else do you have to do”.
So while it’s very easy to assume that we’re all living carefree lives without a thought for another soul, in reality it can be a very, very different story.
True, but don't forget that people with families have the same additional responsibilities you're talking about, PLUS the responsibility for kids and normal family life on top. I've ageing parents with health issues PLUS 5 kids and a business to run. Time for me is nearly zero.
Yup, I got to single parent my 3 kids, work full-time and look after both my parents while my childfree only sibling did nothing. "
Yup , l know what you're saying , sometimes all the work as regards looking after parents etc is left to the one person ..l know ..and even if the work involved was shared it would make things a lot easier but unfortunately that very rarely happens.. their attitude is " ah you're doing a great job " ..  |
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Shout out to all the single parents.
I'm really lucky I get to coparent. It's something I don't take for granted at all and I'm so keenly aware that there's so many who never get a break or never get to see their kids. Being single is a different ball game in so many cases.
I have the benefits of a clean house, when I clean it, and a destroyed house, when I don't.
I can see whoever I want whenever I want. Unless I can't.
I have a single income to finance my single life. And my house and family.
Shout out to all the folks who would trade all the benefits of their marital status to have the opposite.
We all have those days.
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"Shout out to all the single parents.
I'm really lucky I get to coparent. It's something I don't take for granted at all and I'm so keenly aware that there's so many who never get a break or never get to see their kids. Being single is a different ball game in so many cases.
I have the benefits of a clean house, when I clean it, and a destroyed house, when I don't.
I can see whoever I want whenever I want. Unless I can't.
I have a single income to finance my single life. And my house and family.
Shout out to all the folks who would trade all the benefits of their marital status to have the opposite.
We all have those days.
"
Makes me teary just imagining parents who don't get to be with their kids. I'm lucky that my ex and I successfully coparent close to 50/50.. plus having two kids with Laura with us all the time. Co-parenting / step-parenting / blended modern families are wonderful, and I'm blessed to have them all. The house is frequently DESTROYED though. That nearly brings me to tears also  |
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