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Poly, Demi, Pan, ENM, Swinger, Hotwife
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There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
"
I think it’s great because at least you can research each tern and go yes that’s me.
I always knew I wasn’t straight from say my teens but not quite fully bi sexual either. |
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"There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
"
For those with specific tastes it's great as they can express exactly what they are in to. On the other hand, (just my opinion) sometimes it seems like its getting a little complicated and I'm sure there are alot of people who fit into more than one category so maybe a simple 'openminded' is enough? |
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The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive. |
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For those with specific tastes it's great as they can express exactly what they are in to. On the other hand, (just my opinion) sometimes it seems like its getting a little complicated and I'm sure there are alot of people who fit into more than one category so maybe a simple 'openminded' is enough?"
The real fun starts when you start using the words to assemble a fully nuanced picture.
For example a person close to me would identify as an Asexual Demi-Boy Trans Fem Non Binary |
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For those with specific tastes it's great as they can express exactly what they are in to. On the other hand, (just my opinion) sometimes it seems like its getting a little complicated and I'm sure there are alot of people who fit into more than one category so maybe a simple 'openminded' is enough?
The real fun starts when you start using the words to assemble a fully nuanced picture.
For example a person close to me would identify as an Asexual Demi-Boy Trans Fem Non Binary "
And you must be top of their Christmas card list for remembering all that!!
They all seem contradictory to me ... but whatever floats your boat I suppose! |
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By *adylaceWoman
over a year ago
Waterford City |
I love that we live in a world that people now have a language to describe how they identify and feel as a person. My only worry is that it's just another form of label. And I see kids have to "come out" to friends and family multiple times as they go through the natural development of discovering who they are. I'm not a fan of labels myself. I just believe that it's ok to love whoever you love as long as you're not hurting anybody in the process. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was filling out a questionnaire yesterday for some tests in hospital! First time I saw pronoun in the gender/sex section!!
Saying that it’s been a while since I filled one of those forms out , thankfully! |
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"I love that we live in a world that people now have a language to describe how they identify and feel as a person. My only worry is that it's just another form of label. And I see kids have to "come out" to friends and family multiple times as they go through the natural development of discovering who they are. I'm not a fan of labels myself. I just believe that it's ok to love whoever you love as long as you're not hurting anybody in the process. "
Totally agree |
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"I love that we live in a world that people now have a language to describe how they identify and feel as a person. My only worry is that it's just another form of label. And I see kids have to "come out" to friends and family multiple times as they go through the natural development of discovering who they are. I'm not a fan of labels myself. I just believe that it's ok to love whoever you love as long as you're not hurting anybody in the process. "
It's not an unreasonable worry. I've watched my kids friends to go through multiple designations and pronouns between the ages of 10 and 13. Some of the kids have genuine mental health problems, some treat the labels as fashion and try things on for a while because everyone else is. And some find a place for themselves that seems to fit and they are happy in their own skin, safe and supported if they are lucky.
It was quite common in my kids class to start with bisexual non binary as to them, having not sexually matured yet, that made perfect logical sense. |
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"There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
"
To be honest, I’m not a fan
I think it’s tagging yourself for search engine optimisation by the social media generation but if it works for others crack on
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Without recognising difference and naming it, people would have no means of identifyung themselves in the society in which they live.
Without labels we would all exist as a homogeneous group without any room for individuality.
Vive la difference.
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"There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
I think it’s great because at least you can research each tern and go yes that’s me.
I always knew I wasn’t straight from say my teens but not quite fully bi sexual either. "
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ? |
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For those with specific tastes it's great as they can express exactly what they are in to. On the other hand, (just my opinion) sometimes it seems like its getting a little complicated and I'm sure there are alot of people who fit into more than one category so maybe a simple 'openminded' is enough?
The real fun starts when you start using the words to assemble a fully nuanced picture.
For example a person close to me would identify as an Asexual Demi-Boy Trans Fem Non Binary "
So in otherwords... they like what they like ? |
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"I love that we live in a world that people now have a language to describe how they identify and feel as a person. My only worry is that it's just another form of label. And I see kids have to "come out" to friends and family multiple times as they go through the natural development of discovering who they are. I'm not a fan of labels myself. I just believe that it's ok to love whoever you love as long as you're not hurting anybody in the process.
Totally agree " |
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"Without recognising difference and naming it, people would have no means of identifyung themselves in the society in which they live.
Without labels we would all exist as a homogeneous group without any room for individuality.
Vive la difference.
"
Beg to differ ... its far more likely given ancient civilizations, that we would be a group free to express themselves without any barriers of difference!
Since when did it become a good that people need to identify their srxual interests in order to be individual?
Jeasus haven't gay people spent quite a great deal of energy doing their best to get away from being individualized and identify for sexual interests? |
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Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?"
My God.. what an active imagine
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"
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?"
Nuanced or blunt as a butter knife .... call me guy.. bi.. poly..white...he...them...irish..fat...skinny..short...western.. whatever label you choose ...
I am not the type of sex I like nor am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats who I am ! |
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By *ogladyWoman
over a year ago
The bog |
"Without recognising difference and naming it, people would have no means of identifyung themselves in the society in which they live.
Without labels we would all exist as a homogeneous group without any room for individuality.
Vive la difference.
"
But if we go by a certain lable were not individual cause we would be grouped into a certain lable.. |
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"Without recognising difference and naming it, people would have no means of identifyung themselves in the society in which they live.
Without labels we would all exist as a homogeneous group without any room for individuality.
Vive la difference.
"
I don't believe you need to name a difference to recognise it.
Whatever happened to identifying as just "insert your given name" and being accepted as that?!
We most certainly wouldn't be a homogeneous group without these labels because we are all different and unique and constantly change and evolve. People have lived for generations without the need for them.
I get the need to use language and descriptors but the way things are headed it doesn't seem to matter what language you use, you'll offend one person or another regardless. It helps create a further divide in society. Things are bad enough as it is. |
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"There are so many words now to describe sexuality and ones preferred sexual lifestyle.
To name but a few
Polyamorous
Solo Poly
Swinger
Ethical non monogamy
Monogamy
Cuckold
Hotwife
And more
Then there's
Pansexual
Bisexual
Straight
Demi sexual
Homosexual
Asexual
Sapiosexual
Transexual
Transvestite
And so many more.
Do you feel like the world is a better place with more nuanced ways to describe the ever evolving spectrums of sex and sexuality?
Do you ever relate to some of these descriptors that perhaps didn't exist in your world ten years ago?
"
My simple answer - no, the world is not a better place because the language around sex and sexuality is more nuanced.
I would say that particularly for our children and teenagers this becomes even more confusing than childhood and adolescence already is.
It might help adults communicate better when forming relationships but even then, there's no need for labels/terms, you could just describe how you feel, be accepted with those feelings and leave it at that. |
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I hate labels, always have, though I try to be respectful. I personally find them confusing, and often divisive. Plus people grow and change whereas labels can stick.
I prefer meeting people as individuals and working from there. It's a bit freer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jez some of these terms I had to look up as I have never heard of some. I feel really naive now.
I would hate to be a child growing up today as dealing with all their challenges entering and coming out of puberty is more than enough for them to deal with. In my day you were simply a man or woman and that was the norm.
To add my tuppence worth though, I hate labels being used to identify othet people's choices in life or sexual preference. I accept everyone for who they are. I don't judge them on their choices or societal 'tags.' It is their life and I don't want to interfere. After all I have my own life to live without trying to live theirs also.
If my kids came in and told me they were one of these descriptors, the amount of my love for them wouldn't change one iota. If anything I would feel privileged and proud that they shared this with me. I suppose that's a passive adventure of these 'tags' because it could create a more open environment for people to open up about their choices and not bottle it up. Even being gay, years ago, was considered unacceptable and the person was outcasted by communities. What a miserable life they must have had!
We are who we are and if that doesn't fit into a box then who cares as long as they are happy. We are who we are so Live and let live I say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
For those with specific tastes it's great as they can express exactly what they are in to. On the other hand, (just my opinion) sometimes it seems like its getting a little complicated and I'm sure there are alot of people who fit into more than one category so maybe a simple 'openminded' is enough?
The real fun starts when you start using the words to assemble a fully nuanced picture.
For example a person close to me would identify as an Asexual Demi-Boy Trans Fem Non Binary
And you must be top of their Christmas card list for remembering all that!!
They all seem contradictory to me ... but whatever floats your boat I suppose! "
If someone has to use that many words and descriptors on themselves, I find that a lot of them use this self indentity as a basis of their whole personality. So many conversations will come back to their identity in some way or another. Its exhausting |
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"Without recognising difference and naming it, people would have no means of identifyung themselves in the society in which they live.
Without labels we would all exist as a homogeneous group without any room for individuality.
Vive la difference.
But if we go by a certain lable were not individual cause we would be grouped into a certain lable.."
Just to clarify, my point is that if we were "all the same" then there would be no room for difference and individuality in society.
By acknowledging difference we allow each person to express their individuality and to be accepted and more importantly to accept themselves for who they are.
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Names, labels, descriptions etc. are a necessary part of language and without them there wouldn't be much need for us to communicate through speaking, writing, signing, smoke signals, Morse code or any other form of intelligent informative interaction.
Without descriptive words things would remain hidden and not discussed, as would have been the case in the less enlightened past.
No longer is is necessary to silently mouth words which in the past were considered taboo and should remain unspoken.
Without descriptive language all communication, including these forums, would be rendered useless.
Be who you want to be.
Be the best person you can be.
To thine own self be true.
And f*ck the begrudgers!
PS.
I find it a little bit ironic, but also quite refreshing, that someone of my mature years can be more open minded than some who are much younger but seem to have a more blinkered view of the world.
Hopefully with age and maturity will bring people a more expanded view of the reality of life in all if gloriously different splendour.
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
"
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?
Nuanced or blunt as a butter knife .... call me guy.. bi.. poly..white...he...them...irish..fat...skinny..short...western.. whatever label you choose ...
I am not the type of sex I like nor am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats who I am ! "
I love this so I'm going to repeat it, despite my mutual love for the other posters "F*ck the begrudgers", which I've used personally on a frequent basis
I am NOT the type of sex I like NOR am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats WHO I AM ! |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
"
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?
Nuanced or blunt as a butter knife .... call me guy.. bi.. poly..white...he...them...irish..fat...skinny..short...western.. whatever label you choose ...
I am not the type of sex I like nor am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats who I am !
I love this so I'm going to repeat it, despite my mutual love for the other posters "F*ck the begrudgers", which I've used personally on a frequent basis
I am NOT the type of sex I like NOR am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats WHO I AM ! "
PS - forgot to thank BiteMeAgain for the quote |
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"
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?
Nuanced or blunt as a butter knife .... call me guy.. bi.. poly..white...he...them...irish..fat...skinny..short...western.. whatever label you choose ...
I am not the type of sex I like nor am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats who I am !
I love this so I'm going to repeat it, despite my mutual love for the other posters "F*ck the begrudgers", which I've used personally on a frequent basis
I am NOT the type of sex I like NOR am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats WHO I AM !
PS - forgot to thank BiteMeAgain for the quote "
Holy shit someone quoted me
I must be famous
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"
Is it really a good to create more labels and types rather than to create less ?
I imagine you would get various answers hence the discussion.
What do you think?
Nuanced or blunt as a butter knife .... call me guy.. bi.. poly..white...he...them...irish..fat...skinny..short...western.. whatever label you choose ...
I am not the type of sex I like nor am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats who I am !
I love this so I'm going to repeat it, despite my mutual love for the other posters "F*ck the begrudgers", which I've used personally on a frequent basis
I am NOT the type of sex I like NOR am I the colour of my skin
I'd rather if you just used my name ,,, thats WHO I AM !
PS - forgot to thank BiteMeAgain for the quote
Holy shit someone quoted me
I must be famous
"
I think you should be added as a reference to Wikipedia |
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Just catching up with this.
Everyone has a good point of view.
My view is that labels are good in as much has they can help someone who doesn't understand why they feel the way they do to have a way to understand and describe it and then to go on and have the language to communicate their needs with others.
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By *eijaWoman
over a year ago
City Centre |
Whilst labels can communicate a lot they can also be quite confusing these days...
I like to say I am 'evolving' I think as you explore more your tastes/wants/desires can change
B x |
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"Whilst labels can communicate a lot they can also be quite confusing these days...
I like to say I am 'evolving' I think as you explore more your tastes/wants/desires can change
B x"
Yeah I agree. It is a double edged sword and I wonder if it's one of those examples of the pendulum swinging all the way out before it settles back into something more coherent.
I've seen teenagers really benefit from have better language to understand themselves and equally I've seen their friends feel obliged to try on new pronouns.
I've seen adults benefit psychologically and physiologically from understanding that being on the asexual spectrum doesn't mean they are suffering from erectile dysfunction.
And of course I've seen people totally do the dog on it. More so in the US than Ireland. Reading a dating profile that says 'I'm an ENM, Solo Poly, Grey Sexual and Bi Curious man who likes to explore power exchange, CD and CFNM' would require most people Google wtf.
Personally, I enjoy assimilating the new language and don't feel obligated to share what I feel works for me as like you I'm aware that I am evolving and see no need to pin myself down. |
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"Whilst labels can communicate a lot they can also be quite confusing these days...
I like to say I am 'evolving' I think as you explore more your tastes/wants/desires can change
B x"
I very much agree. For most of my life I would have described myself as a heterosexual cis male but now I have discovered more of myself that has changed and at the moment i would describe myself as bisexual genderfluid. |
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Find labels stifling to be honest and never can really find a box to put ourselves in. Saying that if others want to call themselves something that's great in our opinion. Think it's awesome they have an identity of some form. |
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"The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive."
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
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"The
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
"
That's a fair point. Though I can't imagine that the people who choose to define their sexuality and gender beyond social norms are particularly worried about explaining anything to anyone beyond their friends and family.
The comparison between nuanced gender and sexuality and non standard sexual relationships is interesting too. There is a plethora of vocabulary to learn upon entering the swing lifestyle and as most people here are already familiar with it nobody bats an eyelid.
Your average vanilla personage might have just as much trouble understanding a Hotwife Couple who like Same Room Soft Swap.
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"The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive.
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
"
Honestly... in my experience...labels and pronouns have become a bit of a trend rather that an actual identity crisis aid!
People , especially young people make a real point of introducing themselves as pronouns and preferences rather than people and go on and on about what they mean !
I listen to 11,12 and up kids going on about being this that or the other and comparing themselves to other "types" .
Its kinda become a cool thing to be a label and if at all possible a confusing or multi layered one
I think its prettu sad that kids are being thought that who or what sex you have and who you may want to be in a relationship with define you to the extent that you should identify as that .
When in reality what defines a person is their kindness, their actions, their beliefs and purposes in life. I truly believe when we die the pronoun we adopted and the sexual preferences we adopted won't be remembered. The interactions we had and the impressions we left on those we care for will . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive.
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
Honestly... in my experience...labels and pronouns have become a bit of a trend rather that an actual identity crisis aid!
People , especially young people make a real point of introducing themselves as pronouns and preferences rather than people and go on and on about what they mean !
I listen to 11,12 and up kids going on about being this that or the other and comparing themselves to other "types" .
Its kinda become a cool thing to be a label and if at all possible a confusing or multi layered one
I think its prettu sad that kids are being thought that who or what sex you have and who you may want to be in a relationship with define you to the extent that you should identify as that .
When in reality what defines a person is their kindness, their actions, their beliefs and purposes in life. I truly believe when we die the pronoun we adopted and the sexual preferences we adopted won't be remembered. The interactions we had and the impressions we left on those we care for will . "
ain't it the truth |
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All valid opinions and experiences.
We will find out in twenty years if the kids are doing better or worse for it.
In the meantime we here will continue to use myriad labels to describe our kinks, desires, sexual preferences and pubic hair demand's.
Anyone up for cuckolded dogging with a bi sub female who likes bukukke, CNC and daddy dom's?
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"The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive.
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
Honestly... in my experience...labels and pronouns have become a bit of a trend rather that an actual identity crisis aid!
People , especially young people make a real point of introducing themselves as pronouns and preferences rather than people and go on and on about what they mean !
I listen to 11,12 and up kids going on about being this that or the other and comparing themselves to other "types" .
Its kinda become a cool thing to be a label and if at all possible a confusing or multi layered one
I think its prettu sad that kids are being thought that who or what sex you have and who you may want to be in a relationship with define you to the extent that you should identify as that .
When in reality what defines a person is their kindness, their actions, their beliefs and purposes in life. I truly believe when we die the pronoun we adopted and the sexual preferences we adopted won't be remembered. The interactions we had and the impressions we left on those we care for will . "
My teenage daughter is on the spectrum. She went through a phase of identifying as transgender. I was supportive of her but knew full well that she is no more transgender than I am!
She was begging and pleading for hormone therapy and so on.
As an extremely vulnerable person, who is different from neurotypical children and teenagers, she was looking for her peers. The LGBTQ community is a very welcoming and open minded community.
2 years on and she is back to being and feeling like a girl.
But I have met plenty of parents in similar positions, talked to plenty of health care professionals who see and deal with vulnerable children and teenagers on a daily basis with similar experiences to mine.
The other issue, particularly with children and teenagers, is that the last few years of lockdowns, social distancing, school closures have had a detrimental impact on their emotional and psychological development - again this is backed by my personal experience with the many professionals I deal with surrounding my daughter's needs.
Both of those issues can hugely and negatively impact our vulnerable children and teenagers who are exposed to the gender identity and sexuality topic which they are being confronted with through social media, the educational system and their peers.
The fact that countries like Germany want to change laws whereby teenagers as young as 15 can make medical decisions to start the process of transitioning is something that I find extremely worrying because if my daughter had have had the ability to make these decisions, she may well have started a life changing process to her detriment.
That is why I find these "labels" and the education of young people in this aspect very worrying because it most certainly has a huge potential to cause confusion at a time when hormones are running rampant. I'm all for age appropriate sex education but there's way too much and too detailed information given to youths who are not ready for it.
What our children need to be taught is, as biteme said, kindness, respect and at the very least a tolerance, but preferably an acceptance for those who are different - whatever that difference may be.
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"The only one I can personally relate to is straight.
The others mean absolutely nothing to me because I don't know anyone who identifies as anything other than straight.
I don't actually know anyone outside of fab that is openly gay or bisexual and if any of those listed above apply to people I know, I'm not aware of it.
If it allows people to express themselves honestly or gives them comfort knowing that there is a title for their expression then it can only be a positive.
I'm going to add to what I said already here.
I honestly haven't a clue what the vast majority of labels mean and because I don't know anyone who describes themselves as anything other than straight I don't have any inclination to research the other labels.
As reassuring as some people might find it to have a label I'm sure it just makes it even more confusing for those around them.
They then have to spend their time explaining it to the vast majority of people who genuinely aren't aware that these pronouns exist never mind what they mean.
Honestly... in my experience...labels and pronouns have become a bit of a trend rather that an actual identity crisis aid!
People , especially young people make a real point of introducing themselves as pronouns and preferences rather than people and go on and on about what they mean !
I listen to 11,12 and up kids going on about being this that or the other and comparing themselves to other "types" .
Its kinda become a cool thing to be a label and if at all possible a confusing or multi layered one
I think its prettu sad that kids are being thought that who or what sex you have and who you may want to be in a relationship with define you to the extent that you should identify as that .
When in reality what defines a person is their kindness, their actions, their beliefs and purposes in life. I truly believe when we die the pronoun we adopted and the sexual preferences we adopted won't be remembered. The interactions we had and the impressions we left on those we care for will .
My teenage daughter is on the spectrum. She went through a phase of identifying as transgender. I was supportive of her but knew full well that she is no more transgender than I am!
She was begging and pleading for hormone therapy and so on.
As an extremely vulnerable person, who is different from neurotypical children and teenagers, she was looking for her peers. The LGBTQ community is a very welcoming and open minded community.
2 years on and she is back to being and feeling like a girl.
But I have met plenty of parents in similar positions, talked to plenty of health care professionals who see and deal with vulnerable children and teenagers on a daily basis with similar experiences to mine.
The other issue, particularly with children and teenagers, is that the last few years of lockdowns, social distancing, school closures have had a detrimental impact on their emotional and psychological development - again this is backed by my personal experience with the many professionals I deal with surrounding my daughter's needs.
Both of those issues can hugely and negatively impact our vulnerable children and teenagers who are exposed to the gender identity and sexuality topic which they are being confronted with through social media, the educational system and their peers.
The fact that countries like Germany want to change laws whereby teenagers as young as 15 can make medical decisions to start the process of transitioning is something that I find extremely worrying because if my daughter had have had the ability to make these decisions, she may well have started a life changing process to her detriment.
That is why I find these "labels" and the education of young people in this aspect very worrying because it most certainly has a huge potential to cause confusion at a time when hormones are running rampant. I'm all for age appropriate sex education but there's way too much and too detailed information given to youths who are not ready for it.
What our children need to be taught is, as biteme said, kindness, respect and at the very least a tolerance, but preferably an acceptance for those who are different - whatever that difference may be.
"
Very valuable perspective and well put
Your a credit to kids |
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I disagree to an open extent, that these terms are bad for young people. There is no social contagion.
The trans community has been on the receiving end of horrific backlash lately. There is a LOT of misinformation on these topics. And forums like this are not the place where nothing being said is verified.
I have encountered so many people convinced that the transition process is lax, and that doctors are pushy. This couldn't be more wrong. I advice every parent to read the actual policies provided by the experts and clinics working in that field. The internet would have you believe there is no regulation at al.
In reality there is a very long waiting list, years long in many cases, where a multidisciplinary team asses individuals, screening for whether or not they meet strict criteria. Mainly that their gender dysphoria has been consistent and long term, and cannot be put down to other factors.
Trans adults who have been though the process have told me how lengthy and invasive it is.
I think it is a good thing for everyone to be able to be flexible and explore their identity without rigid social norms being enforced upon them.
For a lot of young people they might identity as non-binary and experiment with different gender self expression.
I think this is healthy. In the past we didn't have this luxury.
Trans youths are a very very vulnerable minority. The primary reason any care is available for youths is because the risk of suicide is SO high in this group when they are not supported, or are rejected. All of this is about the wellbeing of young people. Yes, it would be easier if we could have everyone wait till 18, but sad fact is many of those youths are suffering and won't make it to 18. That's the point.
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"I disagree to an open extent, that these terms are bad for young people. There is no social contagion.
The trans community has been on the receiving end of horrific backlash lately. There is a LOT of misinformation on these topics. And forums like this are not the place where nothing being said is verified.
I have encountered so many people convinced that the transition process is lax, and that doctors are pushy. This couldn't be more wrong. I advice every parent to read the actual policies provided by the experts and clinics working in that field. The internet would have you believe there is no regulation at al.
In reality there is a very long waiting list, years long in many cases, where a multidisciplinary team asses individuals, screening for whether or not they meet strict criteria. Mainly that their gender dysphoria has been consistent and long term, and cannot be put down to other factors.
Trans adults who have been though the process have told me how lengthy and invasive it is.
I think it is a good thing for everyone to be able to be flexible and explore their identity without rigid social norms being enforced upon them.
For a lot of young people they might identity as non-binary and experiment with different gender self expression.
I think this is healthy. In the past we didn't have this luxury.
Trans youths are a very very vulnerable minority. The primary reason any care is available for youths is because the risk of suicide is SO high in this group when they are not supported, or are rejected. All of this is about the wellbeing of young people. Yes, it would be easier if we could have everyone wait till 18, but sad fact is many of those youths are suffering and won't make it to 18. That's the point.
"
No social contagion?!?
My daughter was most certainly influenced by social media and peers around her, and guess where those peers get their information from!!!
The special needs unit my daughter attends is full of neurodiverse teens, the majority of whom identify as something different to what they were born as. This is my experience. If you think that these terms aren't at least partially flung around by these youngsters because they're hip, then I would think you to be very naive.
As for the process - I'm sure there are reputable services and health care professionals who do not push the process of transitioning but there are examples where proper procedure was not being adhered to - and particularly vulnerable people with mental health issues and neurodiversity were overlooked!
And this is where I say - this could have been my daughter who is being heavily influenced by people who are different - like people who are members of the LGBTQ community. I dread to think what the consequences might have been if legislation were different and services may have been available to her! She can be extremely convincing!!!
And for the record, my daughter was suicidal and had a failed attempt although she was supported through all possible avenues - by her parents and family as well as a number of different health care professionals.
Neurodiverse youths are also a very very vulnerable minority - heavily influenced by what they see in the LGBTQ community. Allowing or starting a transitioning process before the age of 18 would be criminal, in my opinion. I do believe that these youths should have access to psychological supports and services.
Healthy adults have an idea of the pain and suffering that may ensue with the process, and hopefully an understanding of what the risks are. There's no way in hell a young teenager can possibly give informed medical consent to this - Christ, teens are not legally permitted to drink before 18, or vote but there are countries wishing to lower this age of consent to 15?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
In my limited experience and knowledge of the subject it is very controversial. It's divided massively by opinion. It's kinda hard to sit on the fence , but like most of these issues, personal experience will decide your side of the fence.
I agree with the attraction for young people, finding acceptance, when trying to figure themselves out. But slow down , ALL teenagers are slightly confused. It's never really going to be straightforward. Imagine in 50 years what's goin' to be said about now?
I wish everyone well in their journey and my heart goes out to you ALC , and your daughter |
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"I disagree to an open extent, that these terms are bad for young people. There is no social contagion.
The trans community has been on the receiving end of horrific backlash lately. There is a LOT of misinformation on these topics. And forums like this are not the place where nothing being said is verified.
I have encountered so many people convinced that the transition process is lax, and that doctors are pushy. This couldn't be more wrong. I advice every parent to read the actual policies provided by the experts and clinics working in that field. The internet would have you believe there is no regulation at al.
In reality there is a very long waiting list, years long in many cases, where a multidisciplinary team asses individuals, screening for whether or not they meet strict criteria. Mainly that their gender dysphoria has been consistent and long term, and cannot be put down to other factors.
Trans adults who have been though the process have told me how lengthy and invasive it is.
I think it is a good thing for everyone to be able to be flexible and explore their identity without rigid social norms being enforced upon them.
For a lot of young people they might identity as non-binary and experiment with different gender self expression.
I think this is healthy. In the past we didn't have this luxury.
Trans youths are a very very vulnerable minority. The primary reason any care is available for youths is because the risk of suicide is SO high in this group when they are not supported, or are rejected. All of this is about the wellbeing of young people. Yes, it would be easier if we could have everyone wait till 18, but sad fact is many of those youths are suffering and won't make it to 18. That's the point.
No social contagion?!?
My daughter was most certainly influenced by social media and peers around her, and guess where those peers get their information from!!!
The special needs unit my daughter attends is full of neurodiverse teens, the majority of whom identify as something different to what they were born as. This is my experience. If you think that these terms aren't at least partially flung around by these youngsters because they're hip, then I would think you to be very naive.
As for the process - I'm sure there are reputable services and health care professionals who do not push the process of transitioning but there are examples where proper procedure was not being adhered to - and particularly vulnerable people with mental health issues and neurodiversity were overlooked!
And this is where I say - this could have been my daughter who is being heavily influenced by people who are different - like people who are members of the LGBTQ community. I dread to think what the consequences might have been if legislation were different and services may have been available to her! She can be extremely convincing!!!
And for the record, my daughter was suicidal and had a failed attempt although she was supported through all possible avenues - by her parents and family as well as a number of different health care professionals.
Neurodiverse youths are also a very very vulnerable minority - heavily influenced by what they see in the LGBTQ community. Allowing or starting a transitioning process before the age of 18 would be criminal, in my opinion. I do believe that these youths should have access to psychological supports and services.
Healthy adults have an idea of the pain and suffering that may ensue with the process, and hopefully an understanding of what the risks are. There's no way in hell a young teenager can possibly give informed medical consent to this - Christ, teens are not legally permitted to drink before 18, or vote but there are countries wishing to lower this age of consent to 15?! "
I have attended talks given by adults running an lgbtq child support organization. There is a very detailed process within ireland and when adheard to properly its adequate i belive . I've meet the woman who runs an organization who works with teznsgender teens in ireland and she confirms that for most its an expression of confusion,rebellion and trend .
She did however highlight examples that confirm in her view that in a minority of cases to begin the process as a teen is right for some . This follows months of mental assessments.
So on the question should some people be allowed begin the process before 18. I believe that is a question for the mental health professionals supporting each case.
Should it be Constantly a topic that is bombarding every teenager in the entire country from the age taken possibly begin to understand the words? I would say no .
Kids are extremely impressionable and malleable and that in itself is far more of a justification than what is required to be careful with the information you filled their heads with.
This is where I believe labels are counterproductive and damaging is 2 vulnerable and young demographics of societies.
Do we really think kids would struggle as much if all society taught them was you will feel attracted to some people and sometimes that might be a girl sometimes that might be a boy and it's okay.
Sometimes you might feel like you don't fit in and that you would like to dress differently or behave differently I'm that's OK too.
During life you will have times where you question everything, Who you are and what you are here for. Honestly we all have these questions and life has a way of helping us figure out the answers and that's okay.
There are certainly a small number of genuine cases where bias chemical mental biological reasons why a person may benefit from help with their gender identity.
There are billions of cases everyday where people from all walks of life could benefit hugely from help with being encouraged to just feel who you are ... because nomatter who or what you feel it about . The feelings are unifying. The boxes are dividing. |
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"
The feelings are unifying. The boxes are dividing. "
I feel you have a very balanced view on this matter, and have presented it beautifully.
And that is exactly what I said in a previous post too - labels divide.
My view may be a tad more cynical... |
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"
The feelings are unifying. The boxes are dividing.
I feel you have a very balanced view on this matter, and have presented it beautifully.
And that is exactly what I said in a previous post too - labels divide.
My view may be a tad more cynical... "
Ah not at all
You're very passionate.. its clear and a good thing imo |
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By *indenMan
over a year ago
Naas which is South West of Dublin |
"I like wine, not as keen on, or take little notice of the label…..
Do you enjoy a dabble under the bridge ? "
Not since my younger days…..
My feet are wet, my feet are cold, was the way it went I think…. |
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This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification! |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification! "
The kids that identify as cats in school is an internet hoax
Its well proven that its a hoax but once stuff gets out there its easier to keep the hoax going than to look into it and see it as made up
Don't knock the donuts |
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"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification!
The kids that identify as cats in school is an internet hoax
Its well proven that its a hoax but once stuff gets out there its easier to keep the hoax going than to look into it and see it as made up
Don't knock the donuts "
I assure you it’s not a hoax. In the primary school I went to a young girl identified as a pigeon, now a cat. The school had to make provisions for her regarding bathroom. Don’t ask me what provisions but it is happening on this island. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification!
The kids that identify as cats in school is an internet hoax
Its well proven that its a hoax but once stuff gets out there its easier to keep the hoax going than to look into it and see it as made up
Don't knock the donuts
I assure you it’s not a hoax. In the primary school I went to a young girl identified as a pigeon, now a cat. The school had to make provisions for her regarding bathroom. Don’t ask me what provisions but it is happening on this island. "
Never happened ....total hoax
https://www.irishexaminer.com/lifestyle-columnists/arid-41173435.html |
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"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification!
The kids that identify as cats in school is an internet hoax
Its well proven that its a hoax but once stuff gets out there its easier to keep the hoax going than to look into it and see it as made up
Don't knock the donuts
I assure you it’s not a hoax. In the primary school I went to a young girl identified as a pigeon, now a cat. The school had to make provisions for her regarding bathroom. Don’t ask me what provisions but it is happening on this island.
Never happened ....total hoax
https://www.irishexaminer.com/lifestyle-columnists/arid-41173435.html"
Are you meaning to tell me that we can’t trust everything we read on social media!? |
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"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification! "
Discuss what you want where you want that's what the forums are for
What I will say is I doubt it will be very controversial as it's a little bit nonsensical. |
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"This will prove controversial - a lot of this identifying stuff is bullshit.
Men identifying as women so they can play women’s sports or change in women’s changing rooms is plain wrong. Even genuine trans people agree with this.
People identifying as animals, well a social with a can of cat food as opposed to a donut would make for a great verification!
The kids that identify as cats in school is an internet hoax
Its well proven that its a hoax but once stuff gets out there its easier to keep the hoax going than to look into it and see it as made up
Don't knock the donuts
I assure you it’s not a hoax. In the primary school I went to a young girl identified as a pigeon, now a cat. The school had to make provisions for her regarding bathroom. Don’t ask me what provisions but it is happening on this island. "
So someone identified as a pigeon and a cast in your primary school and school made exceptions 40 years ago????? |
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Thanks everyone who contributed to this very informative discussion.
It can be a triggering subject for some people and I'm really glad to see so many informative opinions.
As Always with these things I learned a lot. |
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What is a woman lol
This has to be the best discussion ever......seemingly its a feeling, nothing to do with birthing children, having a vagina and uterus.The nonsense coming out of gender ideology is a joke,and it coming from misogynistic men in dresses who really actually hate women and are taking women's safe spaces away, this I have a problem with. |
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"What is a woman lol
This has to be the best discussion ever......seemingly its a feeling, nothing to do with birthing children, having a vagina and uterus.The nonsense coming out of gender ideology is a joke,and it coming from misogynistic men in dresses who really actually hate women and are taking women's safe spaces away, this I have a problem with. "
Seriously.... don't you thing thats a big generalization of a complex situation for many? |
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"What is a woman lol
This has to be the best discussion ever......seemingly its a feeling, nothing to do with birthing children, having a vagina and uterus.The nonsense coming out of gender ideology is a joke,and it coming from misogynistic men in dresses who really actually hate women and are taking women's safe spaces away, this I have a problem with. "
I would take your point Ber but would say that it's not the topic being discussed here.
It is a seperate discussion.
Much love to you and Gaz x |
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