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Extroverted or introverted
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So swinging is a social activity that has people from all walks of life. This includes personalities….. Most on here I would define as extroverted based on parties or socials we have been to. However some are good at hiding the shyness and as they say never assume.
To begin:
I am introverted and shy, himself is extroverted and outgoing.
My question is which are you? And how does it impact swinging?
 Missy xxx |
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I can be a bit of both depending on the situation.
I'm not one for being the centre of attention but I'm more than comfortable with groups of proper I know well.
In group socials where I know very few I can hold a conversation with anyone but I don't impose myself on strangers and rarely start conversations.
Other than that no impact on my engagement here. |
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I'd consider myself introverted and some situations will make me feel anxious. With the right company I relax and come out of my shell.
I've yet to get myself back to a social as I'm working up the courage to do that but I do have one or two in mind I'd like to attend. |
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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago
Galway |
I would say I’m an extroverted introvert.
I don’t like being the centre of attention. I prefer smaller groups to big ones and I’m not great at initiating conversations but I am happy to chat away to people if they approach me. The resting bitch face keeps them away sometimes though 
While I enjoy socialising, I can dread it before hand and hate the thought of being around people afterwards 
Social interaction takes a lot out of me and I need a few days afterwards to recharge my social battery. |
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We aren't very good at circulating a room and talking to everyone, but will initiate with interesting folks. Laura is definitely the louder bubbly one, and I'm more likely to read the room and approach the one or two that I want to hear more from. We are both happy to chat with anyone though. I guess that means we are both fairly extroverted in groups |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ask me to organise a social or a party I'm there, but as for initiating conversations with guys I like, I'm useless even if they were naked in front of me I'd be come here meet my friend.
Hence why I don't do parties etc as I'd be in the kitchen or bringing everyone drinks etc.
I will chat to anyone etc but never believe or even think anyone would have any interest in me. Maybe that's why swinging for me has been quiet |
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By *he MickMan
over a year ago
southside |
I'm an introvert and it doesn't help as when I attend socials I usually sit on my own unless I know someone there and leave early enough but I do think the more I go to the more social I will get .
Some people don't realise how hard it is for introverts to attend socials and how awkward we feel .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm an introvert and it doesn't help as when I attend socials I usually sit on my own unless I know someone there and leave early enough but I do think the more I go to the more social I will get .
Some people don't realise how hard it is for introverts to attend socials and how awkward we feel .
"
Most people do know how awkward it can feel as we were all that person at one stage. I always sat, never mingled, would leave early etc and I've attended all the socials alone but since last year I've just gotten up and mingled, no expectations other than having a good night. |
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I'd say when I was younger I was an introvert. As I've gotten older I've gotten an awful lot more extroverted.
These days I'm a pretty confident person, especially in real life. But more than happy to take the piss outta myself.
It probably took me my first 25 years to grow into myself and the last 15 have been me at peace and enjoying it. |
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I'm extrovert in my vanilla life I would say. Don't seek out people, but will happily talk to anyone about anything. Takes me a bit longer, if at all to spark up chat at a fab social. Very comfortable in small social settings or 1-1 meets. |
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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago
Galway |
"I'm an introvert and it doesn't help as when I attend socials I usually sit on my own unless I know someone there and leave early enough but I do think the more I go to the more social I will get .
Some people don't realise how hard it is for introverts to attend socials and how awkward we feel .
"
Definitely let the host know that you need a bit of help being introduced to people! A good host will make sure you’re not left sitting by yourself. |
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By *astelloWoman
over a year ago
Far far away |
Im probably more extroverted than most.. But its more fake it til you make it.
I find socials great as people try to mingle more but overall probably a smaller group I feel more at ease..
I love to chat so if all else fail... The Irish weather is a good start |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
Thought I'd find it difficult when I went to my first social so I brought some donuts with me to hand out to break the ice otherwise I would have sat in a corner
Definitely extroverted now and can chat to most people at a social
Also working with the general public helps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm shy at first until I get to know the person,I get so nervous ona first fab meet can't eat or drink pee a lot lol "
ha ha you remember are meet we didn't stay shy for to long we were for bit at start 5 years ago now
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We are polar opposites. I'm extroverted, love chatting whether its to people I know, total strangers, individuals or groups. P is a quiet introvert, big socials and events arent his idea of fun. He'd prefer 1-1 tea and bun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would say I’m an extroverted introvert.
I don’t like being the centre of attention. I prefer smaller groups to big ones and I’m not great at initiating conversations but I am happy to chat away to people if they approach me. The resting bitch face keeps them away sometimes though
While I enjoy socialising, I can dread it before hand and hate the thought of being around people afterwards
Social interaction takes a lot out of me and I need a few days afterwards to recharge my social battery."
I'm like tis too, minus the resting bitch face I think |
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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago
Galway |
"I would say I’m an extroverted introvert.
I don’t like being the centre of attention. I prefer smaller groups to big ones and I’m not great at initiating conversations but I am happy to chat away to people if they approach me. The resting bitch face keeps them away sometimes though
While I enjoy socialising, I can dread it before hand and hate the thought of being around people afterwards
Social interaction takes a lot out of me and I need a few days afterwards to recharge my social battery.
I'm like tis too, minus the resting bitch face I think "
Eh I dunno about that |
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Can be introvert but try to over compensate so then apologies for talking too much. So no real balance.
Finding it harder since COVID to actually go out and mix with people basically because I got use to being on my own.
Have gone back to the first thing I started doing and joined a local club. Expect the first night it wasn't on but another person was waiting around as well so we had coffee together and chatted.
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I (Mr) think some people are confused about or misunderstand introvert vs extrovert.
Introvert doesn't necessarily equate to an absence of confidence, and nor does extrovert necessarily equate to loads of confidence. I regard myself as confident, but I don't always enjoy social situations, and generally prefer quieter environments. I'm not into small-talk or chit-chat. It's not that I prefer heavy discussions about politics or existentialism, but rather conversations that provoke thought or challenge perceptions. I really enjoyed chatting recently with someone at a fab social - conversation was (briefly) about past relationships and current sexual interests. Not heavy, not "downer". But not burst-out-loud laughing. Just very real-world, personal, honest, and sincere.
In a room full of loud pseudo-alphas, I'll usually slink off to a corner or even head home.
P (Mrs) is more outgoing, more eager to interact with multiple random strangers. But I don't think she has the same degree of confidence in herself as I do in myself.
I think we were both surprised to observe that at the three fab events we've attended, while there were bubbly & fun people (& pseudo-alphas) there (male & female), there were also quite a few quieter people.
Fab socials could be tricky for the SINGLE self-confident introvert. Who wants to go chat with the sulky-looking creepy guy on his own over there? He could be interesting, hilarious, a generous (ie, not self-centered) lover...
For us, P (Mrs) will probably always be the instigator of any social interaction at a fab social. Or rather, any interaction will likely be because of her - she's good-looking, has a fantastic laugh, a really sexy & playful glint in her eye, isn't shy, and loves mingling. I can comfortably hold my own, and given the whole underlying sexual aspect of why we're all here, this means I'm happy for us to chat with pretty much anyone - who knows where P's flirting might take us...   |
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I would be similar to most on here struggle to talk to people unless they instigate it. Grand in smaller meets and parties though less of a stresser. I totally understand the people who have said they don’t talk unless someone starts up a conversation in a party or social as this is me in a nutshell.
In my professional life I have to work really hard to be around people all day, when I get home I need to go for a swim or sit in the car before going into the madness of our house, ideal day is out in the middle of a lake with my kayak alone or with my dogs out for a walk where I meet no one (bliss).
That said I do enjoy talking to others. I couldn’t be a social butterfly everyday of the week! For anyone who knows the MyerBriggs I am an INTJ type no matter what testing done I am always introverted but somehow on another test my 2nd highest trait is communication but communication as we all know isn’t always face to face talking 
Missy xxx |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I'm quite shy and I don't really like big socials, especially when I don't know a lot of the people there. And while yes I will chat to anyone at them I will rarely initiate any conversation with anyone I don't know.
I'm definitely more introverted that anything else. I wish I was more outgoing but that's just not me. |
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I'd consider myself a bit shy and nervous in large groups or big social settings but anyone that meets me would disagree.
Generally I prefer more intimate settings.
Unless I'm dancing and then all bets are off |
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Definitely more comfortable in smaller groups but i talk a lot when im nervous so that can be off putting. Himself is very quiet but in fairness to s from se socials she got him up dancing at the last one we were at. The last time he danced was our wedding lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Definitely an introvert, large groups with certain individuals jockeying for attention are just exhausting. Much more rewarding interactions to be had with very small group or one to one. And lots of alone time is essential to recharge. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also, shyness and introversion are not the same thing."
True , there's the adage...introverts like yo have fun too, they just don't need everybody to know about it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also, shyness and introversion are not the same thing.
True , there's the adage...introverts like yo have fun too, they just don't need everybody to know about it"
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On other fronts, parts of my life in the Normal world/life. I'd be more an extrovert. 
