FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Honesty is the best policy
Honesty is the best policy
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A topic earlier got me thinking.
How do you leave people down.. eg not feeling it
Are you brutal?
Are you soft?
Are you an avoider?
Are you a blocker?
"
That's a great question .. I don't have a bad bone in my body,that's the truth, I'd hate to hurt anyones feelings and do you know what if no response is a good response.. move on .. sorry |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
Think its better to be honest...we're all adults
If I met someone for a coffee and at the end there's no spark Id say it...not harshly...no need for that but a quick...nice chatting but not getting a spark so sorry but wont meet again
I think its a lot easier but to be fair I'm useless at picking up signals so prefer to be told |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It happens all the time , no spark when people meet , I think a person knows after less than 10 second's if things are gonna go any further..l really do ...their eyes tell it all.  |
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It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person. |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
On here I've a simple polite standard answer that doesn't involve any motivation of rejection. I don't want to explain myself but also don't see a point in antagonising someone unnecessarily just because they don't tickle my fancy for whatever reason. Cuts out any abuse. |
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"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person."
I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A topic earlier got me thinking.
How do you leave people down.. eg not feeling it
Are you brutal?
Are you soft?
Are you an avoider?
Are you a blocker?
That's a great question .. I don't have a bad bone in my body,that's the truth, I'd hate to hurt anyones feelings and do you know what if no response is a good response.. move on .. sorry "
Herself is the same so she leaves it to me as I can be a bit too forward (I'm American). I usually just say "Sorry, not interested" or "Maybe some other time". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.
I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."
Did you tell him about your Sahara issue??
He probably had a solution to that too??  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honesty is always the best policy. I'm the kinda guy who's always up to meet someone for a social coffee and chat and see how ya get on.... Not everyone is gonna be everyone's cuppa tea but I believe it's better to at least meet in person and then let them know "regardless of any play or that". For me that's just the bonus to it all, but yeah it's much better than making up excuses ect to pull out and leave someone guessing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.
I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."
I must admit that I didn't know otters had pockets or that they got wet.
As far as attraction goes, I'm quickly discovering the two main types of swingers. Those, like yourself, who want attraction and a connection to move forward and those who just want to fuck someone other than their current partner; I think we fall into the later group. However, we still don't just want to fuck any randomer. If the person is dog ugly, sorry, but not interested. Absolutely gorgeous but the size of the Titanic? Sorry, not interested. |
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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago
Dundalk |
We get very few messages but normally if there is no attraction we say they aren't what we are looking for.
Most take that ok and say no problem. A few get annoyed.
We got one message recently which was almost copy and paste from the last one they sent 6 months and it was only after replying we realised the response was almost word for word what we had said the last time.
We drew his attention to the first line in our profile that says we aren't currently meeting and that the scenarios he proposed in his message are also mentioned in our bio where it states clearly that we have no interest in any of them.
The response we got was that we were one of those types!
No idea what those types are but hey ho. |
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"It depends on the person and their attitude. A recent coffee meet was with a lovely girl, she was fun and chatty and we enjoyed a nice lunch, but there was no sexual spark and I had to say no nicely. Alternatively, the many low-effort no-compatibility messages we get don't deserve a proper response, or may well get a silent block. Depends on the situation and the person.
I had coffee with guy lovely fella buy just not for me. I told him over coffee I wasn't feeling the attraction. I'll never forget his reply he said this was a sex site there's no need to be attracted to each other. Eh trying telling that to my vagina she's like the Sahara if there's no attraction. On the other hand she's wetter than a otters pocket when there is one.."
Agree on the Sahara and the otters pocket effect which why we rarely do hookups without a prior social, it's just too risky  |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I wouldn't block especially if it's someone I have been chatting to. I have told them that I don't think it will be going any farther. Or sometimes the chat just fizzled out over time anyhow. Either way I would prefer to do that than just block. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm quickly discovering the two main types of swingers. Those, like yourself, who want attraction and a connection to move forward and those who just want to fuck someone other than their current partner;"
This is a fascinating insight. I'd love to hear more.
Also, hats off for the correct use of a semicolon. |
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