FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Single.Males.Complaining
Single.Males.Complaining
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"Are the guys verified? When you say send photos are they " naughty or explicit" some guys just like to collect pics and never meet" Some have been verified, some not. Any pics iv sent have been just face selfies, no explicit | |||
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"Their loss imo" Thank you  | |||
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"Most guys in your age range will be on dating sites not swing sites." All the guys iv chatted with are in my age range and on here, can’t speak about the ones on dating sites as I’m speaking about the ones on here. So I can’t see your point really but thank you for your input. | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss" Ah thank you so much, I’ll keep going for another while anyways  | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey " Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss" Why is it their loss? | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol " The poor me threads irritate everyone | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? " She’s hot | |||
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"Poor form on there part hopefully you can what you desire might be a possibility that the age range of the single males are immature or have not a clue maybe try upping your upper limit by 2 to 5 years and see if any improvement " Yeah I think I will give that a try thank you for that x | |||
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"OP stay safe here,many fakes and people with multiple profiles,go with your heart and gut, alot of good people here also "I will do, thank you xx | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot" Have you seen her face pic? | |||
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"Standard Fab advice is..... Go to social events to get to know people. " He's going to watch Scotland n Ireland on Sunday in Cork | |||
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"Standard Fab advice is..... Go to social events to get to know people. He's going to watch Scotland n Ireland on Sunday in Cork "Strictly for the rugby..... | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? " Dunno why you’ve to rock on the forums and stir the pot She’s a smashing body and I’d say she’s pretty from top to toe | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss" This... | |||
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"Standard Fab advice is..... Go to social events to get to know people. He's going to watch Scotland n Ireland on Sunday in Cork
Strictly for the rugby..... "Lol great banter .. Mr tight Jocks  | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? Dunno why you’ve to rock on the forums and stir the pot She’s a smashing body and I’d say she’s pretty from top to toe" Maybe she is, maybe she isnt Im not stirring any pot. | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "Well you look wonderful in your photos. You could try attending a social event. I think there was a South East social recently. If the younger guys are not interested in a met, I'm available for a social coffee, chat and laughs. I'll travel to Waterford | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? " Does it matter what a person looks like | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? Does it matter what a person looks like " Well yes, of course it does? Do you meet people youre not attracted to? | |||
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"I think sometimes with people on here it’s the fantasy of the whole thing that pulls them in but when it involves actually meeting, whether a coffee meet first or play meet, the cold feet or nerves kick in. As suggested, getting to socials can be a great way to meet people and they can be a great night out too. " Yes I agree the nerves do kick in and that’s completely understandable but sometimes it’s just better to be honest than just ghost a person. As for the socials I would love to attend them but it’s a bit scary for a single female on their own that’s why I’m trying to get a few 1 on 1 meets. Thank you though | |||
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"If it starts effecting your mental health then take a break from Fab for a while Is it just as hard on other hook up sites for young people " No it’s frustrating but the day it starts effecting my mental health I’m out of here. thank you | |||
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"I think sometimes with people on here it’s the fantasy of the whole thing that pulls them in but when it involves actually meeting, whether a coffee meet first or play meet, the cold feet or nerves kick in. As suggested, getting to socials can be a great way to meet people and they can be a great night out too. Yes I agree the nerves do kick in and that’s completely understandable but sometimes it’s just better to be honest than just ghost a person. As for the socials I would love to attend them but it’s a bit scary for a single female on their own that’s why I’m trying to get a few 1 on 1 meets. Thank you though "The Socials are much better than one on one meets as they set up a chat group and those who are attending can chat on group or ask to chat in private | |||
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"You’ve just had bad exp and can’t paint us all with same brush , I’ve never not turned up for a meet with any woman and I’m sure there’s many the same. Prob is an age thing , so just try older guys and see. " I wasn’t painting everyone with the same brush, I’m just sharing my experience with the ones iv been chatting too(which has been a lot) maybe as you say it is the age thing. thank you | |||
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"You’ve just had bad exp and can’t paint us all with same brush , I’ve never not turned up for a meet with any woman and I’m sure there’s many the same. Prob is an age thing , so just try older guys and see. I wasn’t painting everyone with the same brush, I’m just sharing my experience with the ones iv been chatting too(which has been a lot) maybe as you say it is the age thing. thank you "If its happening a lot to you, perhaps its something in how youre interacting with them in chat thats putting them off. Either that or the attraction isnt there after pics are swapped. Only you can probably answer the former | |||
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"I think sometimes with people on here it’s the fantasy of the whole thing that pulls them in but when it involves actually meeting, whether a coffee meet first or play meet, the cold feet or nerves kick in. As suggested, getting to socials can be a great way to meet people and they can be a great night out too. Yes I agree the nerves do kick in and that’s completely understandable but sometimes it’s just better to be honest than just ghost a person. As for the socials I would love to attend them but it’s a bit scary for a single female on their own that’s why I’m trying to get a few 1 on 1 meets. Thank you though
The Socials are much better than one on one meets as they set up a chat group and those who are attending can chat on group or ask to chat in private "The chat groups can be very good to get to know people before the social and you could arrange to meet people off them so you’d know a few that are going then if it is your first one. | |||
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"I think sometimes with people on here it’s the fantasy of the whole thing that pulls them in but when it involves actually meeting, whether a coffee meet first or play meet, the cold feet or nerves kick in. As suggested, getting to socials can be a great way to meet people and they can be a great night out too. Yes I agree the nerves do kick in and that’s completely understandable but sometimes it’s just better to be honest than just ghost a person. As for the socials I would love to attend them but it’s a bit scary for a single female on their own that’s why I’m trying to get a few 1 on 1 meets. Thank you though "My very first social I attended, I knew noone, was on my own and I don't look half as good as you and was nervous as hell, almost didn't go but I did and at time it was scary and the next few were too but now I love them, I've given up on meeting a guy on here and just enjoy the socials | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? Does it matter what a person looks like Well yes, of course it does? Do you meet people youre not attracted to? " I’m at home and just for instance if you have read our profile herself is out tonight meeting someone for a drink If she’s happy when she comes home she’ll tell me that this person is the one And yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder | |||
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"You’ve just had bad exp and can’t paint us all with same brush , I’ve never not turned up for a meet with any woman and I’m sure there’s many the same. Prob is an age thing , so just try older guys and see. I wasn’t painting everyone with the same brush, I’m just sharing my experience with the ones iv been chatting too(which has been a lot) maybe as you say it is the age thing. thank you
If its happening a lot to you, perhaps its something in how youre interacting with them in chat thats putting them off. Either that or the attraction isnt there after pics are swapped.
Only you can probably answer the former "Yeah you must be right, it’s all me I’m ugly and iv no chat | |||
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"You’ve just had bad exp and can’t paint us all with same brush , I’ve never not turned up for a meet with any woman and I’m sure there’s many the same. Prob is an age thing , so just try older guys and see. I wasn’t painting everyone with the same brush, I’m just sharing my experience with the ones iv been chatting too(which has been a lot) maybe as you say it is the age thing. thank you
If its happening a lot to you, perhaps its something in how youre interacting with them in chat thats putting them off. Either that or the attraction isnt there after pics are swapped.
Only you can probably answer the former
Yeah you must be right, it’s all me I’m ugly and iv no chat "Nobody is saying that. But if its happening to you all the time then its only logical to start with yourself first when seeking an explanation. Thats what any man would be told when posing the same question | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? Does it matter what a person looks like Well yes, of course it does? Do you meet people youre not attracted to? I’m at home and just for instance if you have read our profile herself is out tonight meeting someone for a drink If she’s happy when she comes home she’ll tell me that this person is the one And yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder " Don’t try older if that’s not for you | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? Does it matter what a person looks like Well yes, of course it does? Do you meet people youre not attracted to? I’m at home and just for instance if you have read our profile herself is out tonight meeting someone for a drink If she’s happy when she comes home she’ll tell me that this person is the one And yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder " Sorry i dont follow? How does that answer my question? | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone" Is this not technically one? | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? " This have you | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? This have you " Sorry, are you asking me something? | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone Is this not technically one?" Its refreshing to have a poor me thread where the profile pic isn’t of a cock | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone Is this not technically one?" This is not a poor me thread, I’m giving my opinion ON the poor me threads and in relation to your previous comment, i totally accept people’s preferences and I am sure I’m not everybody’s preference but when you have chatted to someone for days, swapped pics etc, arranged to meet and then all goes quiet that is what I was referring too. If my interaction was that bad with people why arrange time and place to meet. Nothing is trailing off,it’s coming to a full stop. Like I have said to everybody else thank you for your input. | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? This have you Sorry, are you asking me something? " I suppose it’s not a question but stating what you previously posted Have you seen her face pic why is that important | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone Is this not technically one? This is not a poor me thread, I’m giving my opinion ON the poor me threads and in relation to your previous comment, i totally accept people’s preferences and I am sure I’m not everybody’s preference but when you have chatted to someone for days, swapped pics etc, arranged to meet and then all goes quiet that is what I was referring too. If my interaction was that bad with people why arrange time and place to meet. Nothing is trailing off,it’s coming to a full stop. Like I have said to everybody else thank you for your input." So do you have a better understanding of what brings people to start poor me threads now? Again as I said if it's happening continuously then there must be a common denominator. | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? This have you Sorry, are you asking me something? I suppose it’s not a question but stating what you previously posted Have you seen her face pic why is that important " No i havent seen her face pic. As for your second question, people are attracted to faces. Or not, as the case may be | |||
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"Maybe the poor fellas are intimidated by you fabs full of bluffers and spoofers and that’s before you get to the people who just want a bit of attention Keep ploughing on and do your own thing, it’s their loss Why is it their loss? She’s hot Have you seen her face pic? This have you Sorry, are you asking me something? I suppose it’s not a question but stating what you previously posted Have you seen her face pic why is that important No i havent seen her face pic. As for your second question, people are attracted to faces. Or not, as the case may be" Ok whatever | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone Is this not technically one? This is not a poor me thread, I’m giving my opinion ON the poor me threads and in relation to your previous comment, i totally accept people’s preferences and I am sure I’m not everybody’s preference but when you have chatted to someone for days, swapped pics etc, arranged to meet and then all goes quiet that is what I was referring too. If my interaction was that bad with people why arrange time and place to meet. Nothing is trailing off,it’s coming to a full stop. Like I have said to everybody else thank you for your input. So do you have a better understanding of what brings people to start poor me threads now? Again as I said if it's happening continuously then there must be a common denominator. " Yes I have complete understanding now after you’ve enlightened me, as you do for so many on the forum | |||
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"Jesus you look amazing I can’t believe that your having trouble getting a meet especially with all the complaints or profiles starting threads that it’s so hard for males on here to get meets Best of luck on your journey Thank you, yes iv been reading the forums for a long time but never had the confidence to post but it just gets irritating after a while with all the “poor me” threads. It’s definitely poor me and not them lol The poor me threads irritate everyone Is this not technically one? This is not a poor me thread, I’m giving my opinion ON the poor me threads and in relation to your previous comment, i totally accept people’s preferences and I am sure I’m not everybody’s preference but when you have chatted to someone for days, swapped pics etc, arranged to meet and then all goes quiet that is what I was referring too. If my interaction was that bad with people why arrange time and place to meet. Nothing is trailing off,it’s coming to a full stop. Like I have said to everybody else thank you for your input. So do you have a better understanding of what brings people to start poor me threads now? Again as I said if it's happening continuously then there must be a common denominator. Yes I have complete understanding now after you’ve enlightened me, as you do for so many on the forum "I have little insight on this topic tbh. I just thought now that your frustration at not being able to get decent meets and being ghosted after arranging times and places had driven you to make a thread you might have some | |||
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"Justbo couldn’t have summed it up any better. I’m going to be very candid here so if this comes across as rude it’s definitely not my intention and apologies in advance. Also it’s just my own opinion and I’m sure it took a lot of courage for you to post this. It’s twofold your profile has a few red flags for me. Veris - you’ve got just 1 over a year ago. I’m not saying you should post up who it was but being verified by another reputable profile goes a long way. I also question if you’ve been comfortable enough to speak on the phone and share face pics that you don’t have cam veris. Photos - They’ve been bulk uploaded. As in just posted on the same days. Also one of your photos is a screenshot Profile text - your profile name is an interesting one. Your profile text also comes across as pessimistic. And the statement about there not being a scene for young people anymore makes me think how did you even know there was one if you are relatively new with 1 coffee meet. The other side of it is your vetting process like others have mentioned. There’s a few other things in my head but I’m not trying to bash you or point fingers as I’m sure you could do the same for mine and none of us have perfect profiles. Often times too men can tell if they are speaking to other men which is why they may just stop engaging after a while. There’s a lot of great advice and points in this forum and to reiterate some of them. Socials are definitely the way forward to get to know others. Less pressure, public place and much safer than a 1 on 1 Don’t compromise on your preferences, age ranges etc if it’s not something you want And people respond how they want to respond. Nothing you can do about that but you can definitely control how you react to it. It’s all part of fab unfortunately Anyways good luck fabbing I hope you have fun soon ".. I think you just out Bo'd Bo  | |||
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"Justbo couldn’t have summed it up any better. I’m going to be very candid here so if this comes across as rude it’s definitely not my intention and apologies in advance. Also it’s just my own opinion and I’m sure it took a lot of courage for you to post this. It’s twofold your profile has a few red flags for me. Veris - you’ve got just 1 over a year ago. I’m not saying you should post up who it was but being verified by another reputable profile goes a long way. I also question if you’ve been comfortable enough to speak on the phone and share face pics that you don’t have cam veris. Photos - They’ve been bulk uploaded. As in just posted on the same days. Also one of your photos is a screenshot Profile text - your profile name is an interesting one. Your profile text also comes across as pessimistic. And the statement about there not being a scene for young people anymore makes me think how did you even know there was one if you are relatively new with 1 coffee meet. The other side of it is your vetting process like others have mentioned. There’s a few other things in my head but I’m not trying to bash you or point fingers as I’m sure you could do the same for mine and none of us have perfect profiles. Often times too men can tell if they are speaking to other men which is why they may just stop engaging after a while. There’s a lot of great advice and points in this forum and to reiterate some of them. Socials are definitely the way forward to get to know others. Less pressure, public place and much safer than a 1 on 1 Don’t compromise on your preferences, age ranges etc if it’s not something you want And people respond how they want to respond. Nothing you can do about that but you can definitely control how you react to it. It’s all part of fab unfortunately Anyways good luck fabbing I hope you have fun soon ..
I think you just out Bo'd Bo " | |||
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"Justbo couldn’t have summed it up any better. I’m going to be very candid here so if this comes across as rude it’s definitely not my intention and apologies in advance. Also it’s just my own opinion and I’m sure it took a lot of courage for you to post this. It’s twofold your profile has a few red flags for me. Veris - you’ve got just 1 over a year ago. I’m not saying you should post up who it was but being verified by another reputable profile goes a long way. I also question if you’ve been comfortable enough to speak on the phone and share face pics that you don’t have cam veris. Photos - They’ve been bulk uploaded. As in just posted on the same days. Also one of your photos is a screenshot Profile text - your profile name is an interesting one. Your profile text also comes across as pessimistic. And the statement about there not being a scene for young people anymore makes me think how did you even know there was one if you are relatively new with 1 coffee meet. The other side of it is your vetting process like others have mentioned. There’s a few other things in my head but I’m not trying to bash you or point fingers as I’m sure you could do the same for mine and none of us have perfect profiles. Often times too men can tell if they are speaking to other men which is why they may just stop engaging after a while. There’s a lot of great advice and points in this forum and to reiterate some of them. Socials are definitely the way forward to get to know others. Less pressure, public place and much safer than a 1 on 1 Don’t compromise on your preferences, age ranges etc if it’s not something you want And people respond how they want to respond. Nothing you can do about that but you can definitely control how you react to it. It’s all part of fab unfortunately Anyways good luck fabbing I hope you have fun soon ..
I think you just out Bo'd Bo "He did indeed | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "I'm in Woterfod today let me know location and time... 100% seriously guy no dram... Maybe you change mind... But generally it's a lot time wasters hire | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "Tbh it's not just single lads who have this bad habit, I've experienced that with couples and women on here, a lot of bluffers going dark | |||
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"I think some of the replies on this thread are not only unhelpful, but also harsh. Thankfully, others are not. The op could, perhaps, improve upon her profile and her filtering of those she is engaging with, but I think it is quite unfair to suggest that she is the common denominator. There are so many people on here, both men and women, who are flaky, cancel, or never actually intend to meet socially. That is a reality. Unfortunately for the op, this has happened an inordinate amount of times, so to lessen that, she may need to come up with ways of filtering those she chooses to engage with. I don't think she should change her age range, if it is outside her preference. I do think that fleshing out her profile and having firm boundaries could help, as well as clear communication with those she chooses to engage with. I find that this helps to filter out the vast majority of fantasists, etc., Socials are also a great idea, if she is open to those. All the best O.P! " I might have missed it but I didn't see anyone say she was the common denominator, only that if she reviewed all the interactions there may be a common denominator or trend within them. Certainly that was what I said and I was the one that used the phrase | |||
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"I think some of the replies on this thread are not only unhelpful, but also harsh. Thankfully, others are not. The op could, perhaps, improve upon her profile and her filtering of those she is engaging with, but I think it is quite unfair to suggest that she is the common denominator. There are so many people on here, both men and women, who are flaky, cancel, or never actually intend to meet socially. That is a reality. Unfortunately for the op, this has happened an inordinate amount of times, so to lessen that, she may need to come up with ways of filtering those she chooses to engage with. I don't think she should change her age range, if it is outside her preference. I do think that fleshing out her profile and having firm boundaries could help, as well as clear communication with those she chooses to engage with. I find that this helps to filter out the vast majority of fantasists, etc., Socials are also a great idea, if she is open to those. All the best O.P! I might have missed it but I didn't see anyone say she was the common denominator, only that if she reviewed all the interactions there may be a common denominator or trend within them. Certainly that was what I said and I was the one that used the phrase" Hi, Yes, you used that phrase, suggesting that there must be a common denominator. My using the same phrase wasn't a pointed comment in your direction; apologies that it came across as such! It was simply the most fitting term as, while others didn't use that specific term, I do believe that they inferred/expressed just that. I maintain that some of those comments were merely unhelpful and/or harsh. Also, I think some of the commentary could have been expressed better, one of yours included. While I read the forums regularly and would think that, on the whole, you are quite balanced and fair, I am not sure that might have come across to the O.P. | |||
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" Hi, Yes, you used that phrase, suggesting that there must be a common denominator. My using the same phrase wasn't a pointed comment in your direction; apologies that it came across as such! It was simply the most fitting term as, while others didn't use that specific term, I do believe that they inferred/expressed just that. I maintain that some of those comments were merely unhelpful and/or harsh. Also, I think some of the commentary could have been expressed better, one of yours included. While I read the forums regularly and would think that, on the whole, you are quite balanced and fair, I am not sure that might have come across to the O.P. " It could be my comment you are referring to so and if it is I stand by my comment. If you are constantly being messed about by timewasters as the op says she has been then yes you should look inward and see if you can change how you interact with others. And I say this from my own experiences when I first joined here. I learned early on not to jump through hoops to prove anything to anyone else, not to engage in sex talk through cam or messages, not to send pics to the other person no matter how genuine they seem at the time. To basically spot those who are on here just blowing smoke up your ass and asking for wank material etc.At the start I had several guys mess me about and you know what it was my own fault for pandering to them. Since I stopped all that I've had zero issues since. Yes I don't chat to many on here cos plenty stop chatting once you won't jump through hoops for them but that is fine because those who I have chatted to are those who I have met and I've never been ghosted on here either. As in someone not showing up for a meet when we have arranged one. So the op can either take what I said as advise or ignore it. I didn't say anyone has to listen to anything I say on here I just gave my opinion just like I would to anyone who would ask the same question. It does amuse me though how the advice is a lot more brutal from a lot of people when a man asks something along the same lines and yet no one bats an eye at that. | |||
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"All those telling her to go to socials etc, to be fair, thats probably not going to be an option for her. She looking for people her own age, the average age at those socials is probably twice her age" This not at all true. There were plenty of younger people at the last social I went to. Also the more fetish type sites have plenty of younger people on them. I get messaged on here my men in their 20's all the time and many suggesting to meet at socials. | |||
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" It could be my comment you are referring to so and if it is I stand by my comment. If you are constantly being messed about by timewasters as the op says she has been then yes you should look inward and see if you can change how you interact with others. And I say this from my own experiences when I first joined here. I learned early on not to jump through hoops to prove anything to anyone else, not to engage in sex talk through cam or messages, not to send pics to the other person no matter how genuine they seem at the time. To basically spot those who are on here just blowing smoke up your ass and asking for wank material etc.At the start I had several guys mess me about and you know what it was my own fault for pandering to them. Since I stopped all that I've had zero issues since. Yes I don't chat to many on here cos plenty stop chatting once you won't jump through hoops for them but that is fine because those who I have chatted to are those who I have met and I've never been ghosted on here either. As in someone not showing up for a meet when we have arranged one. So the op can either take what I said as advise or ignore it. I didn't say anyone has to listen to anything I say on here I just gave my opinion just like I would to anyone who would ask the same question. It does amuse me though how the advice is a lot more brutal from a lot of people when a man asks something along the same lines and yet no one bats an eye at that. " Hi Bo, No, it wasn't. However, I maintain that some comments read as unhelpful/harsh. The op is 21 and, while quite obviously an adult, more than likely hasn't had as much opportunity(read: years) to develop her own way of filtering, etc., I don't know about anybody else, but my boundaries, bs detector, etc., have all only increased with age and its side accompaniment of life experience. I simply think that some replies have been unnecessarily harsh. Also, while some good points have been made re. looking at her own way of filtering, it still remains that there are quite a few people on here who will never follow through with meeting. Of course, that is their prerogative. However, we all have come across those who are here for an ego boost, out of curiosity, etc., and will never actually meet. And, while I know that your last point wasn't directed at me, as I have never commented on a similar thread started by a male, I will say that I actually have a lot of empathy for men on here. The ratio of men to women is completely imbalanced and while, some can and do stand out, it isn't easy for the vast majority. | |||
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" It could be my comment you are referring to so and if it is I stand by my comment. If you are constantly being messed about by timewasters as the op says she has been then yes you should look inward and see if you can change how you interact with others. And I say this from my own experiences when I first joined here. I learned early on not to jump through hoops to prove anything to anyone else, not to engage in sex talk through cam or messages, not to send pics to the other person no matter how genuine they seem at the time. To basically spot those who are on here just blowing smoke up your ass and asking for wank material etc.At the start I had several guys mess me about and you know what it was my own fault for pandering to them. Since I stopped all that I've had zero issues since. Yes I don't chat to many on here cos plenty stop chatting once you won't jump through hoops for them but that is fine because those who I have chatted to are those who I have met and I've never been ghosted on here either. As in someone not showing up for a meet when we have arranged one. So the op can either take what I said as advise or ignore it. I didn't say anyone has to listen to anything I say on here I just gave my opinion just like I would to anyone who would ask the same question. It does amuse me though how the advice is a lot more brutal from a lot of people when a man asks something along the same lines and yet no one bats an eye at that. Hi Bo, No, it wasn't. However, I maintain that some comments read as unhelpful/harsh. The op is 21 and, while quite obviously an adult, more than likely hasn't had as much opportunity(read: years) to develop her own way of filtering, etc., I don't know about anybody else, but my boundaries, bs detector, etc., have all only increased with age and its side accompaniment of life experience. I simply think that some replies have been unnecessarily harsh. Also, while some good points have been made re. looking at her own way of filtering, it still remains that there are quite a few people on here who will never follow through with meeting. Of course, that is their prerogative. However, we all have come across those who are here for an ego boost, out of curiosity, etc., and will never actually meet. And, while I know that your last point wasn't directed at me, as I have never commented on a similar thread started by a male, I will say that I actually have a lot of empathy for men on here. The ratio of men to women is completely imbalanced and while, some can and do stand out, it isn't easy for the vast majority. " | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. " I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. " That's your opinion obviously but as the father of 3 young women in their 20s and 30s my comment is very balanced and based on experience. I haven't said the op is a poor judge of character or not mature enough to sniff out bs. The op was the one who chose to start a thread about whining men but appears to only want to be told to keep on doing what she has been doing despite that not working at all. I would offer the same advice to a 21 year old man regardless of whether it was fab related or not. Take a step back and you might find a way around the obstacle that prevents you moving forward. | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "Maybe they're gay or not right in the head,, could only be either of those to turn you down | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. " Exactly... If it ain't working, change it. I don't think it's harsh to ask someone to take an introspective approach. "You talk to one asshole in a day, you've spoken to an asshole. If everyone you talk to is an asshole; you're the asshole." Always start by asking "what am I bringing to the table?" | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. That's your opinion obviously but as the father of 3 young women in their 20s and 30s my comment is very balanced and based on experience. I haven't said the op is a poor judge of character or not mature enough to sniff out bs. The op was the one who chose to start a thread about whining men but appears to only want to be told to keep on doing what she has been doing despite that not working at all. I would offer the same advice to a 21 year old man regardless of whether it was fab related or not. Take a step back and you might find a way around the obstacle that prevents you moving forward." You didn't answer my question, but I would imagine that you have evolved since your early 20s, which I would also imagine influences some of the advice you offer your adult children. On the whole, I think your original reply lacks balance - could it not be a variety of factors? I certainly didn't advise the op to keep doing as she is doing, and neither did most others, nor did I suggest that simply suggesting that she make changes to her approach was, in and of itself, harsh. | |||
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"Most guys in your age range will be on dating sites not swing sites." My Thoughts exactly | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. That's your opinion obviously but as the father of 3 young women in their 20s and 30s my comment is very balanced and based on experience. I haven't said the op is a poor judge of character or not mature enough to sniff out bs. The op was the one who chose to start a thread about whining men but appears to only want to be told to keep on doing what she has been doing despite that not working at all. I would offer the same advice to a 21 year old man regardless of whether it was fab related or not. Take a step back and you might find a way around the obstacle that prevents you moving forward. You didn't answer my question, but I would imagine that you have evolved since your early 20s, which I would also imagine influences some of the advice you offer your adult children. On the whole, I think your original reply lacks balance - could it not be a variety of factors? I certainly didn't advise the op to keep doing as she is doing, and neither did most others, nor did I suggest that simply suggesting that she make changes to her approach was, in and of itself, harsh. " I didn't see it as a question that needed answered because the answer is pretty obvious but this thread isn't about me. My life experiences do indeed have an effect on any advice I give to anyone but I didn't comment on this thread to give advice because lots already have. My original comment was highlighting how some people react totally differently to an op based on their age or sex. That's obviously one of the joys of being on fab but advising someone to look at common denominators is always going to be more helpful than telling them they look amazing and people must be idiots. | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. Exactly... If it ain't working, change it. I don't think it's harsh to ask someone to take an introspective approach. "You talk to one asshole in a day, you've spoken to an asshole. If everyone you talk to is an asshole; you're the asshole." Always start by asking "what am I bringing to the table?"" Jesus, suggesting that the op is the so-called asshole is really helpful...  This could be the case, but I highly doubt it. I think it is more likely down to a combination of factors.
Also, did anybody else pay attention to what the op stated about it being her first time to post a thread, previously never having had the confidence to? | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. Exactly... If it ain't working, change it. I don't think it's harsh to ask someone to take an introspective approach. "You talk to one asshole in a day, you've spoken to an asshole. If everyone you talk to is an asshole; you're the asshole." Always start by asking "what am I bringing to the table?" Jesus, suggesting that the op is the so-called asshole is really helpful... This could be the case, but I highly doubt it. I think it is more likely down to a combination of factors.
Also, did anybody else pay attention to what the op stated about it being her first time to post a thread, previously never having had the confidence to? "I made no suggestion that anyone was an asshole; I'm simply saying that you should start with yourself and work outwards from that. | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. That's your opinion obviously but as the father of 3 young women in their 20s and 30s my comment is very balanced and based on experience. I haven't said the op is a poor judge of character or not mature enough to sniff out bs. The op was the one who chose to start a thread about whining men but appears to only want to be told to keep on doing what she has been doing despite that not working at all. I would offer the same advice to a 21 year old man regardless of whether it was fab related or not. Take a step back and you might find a way around the obstacle that prevents you moving forward. You didn't answer my question, but I would imagine that you have evolved since your early 20s, which I would also imagine influences some of the advice you offer your adult children. On the whole, I think your original reply lacks balance - could it not be a variety of factors? I certainly didn't advise the op to keep doing as she is doing, and neither did most others, nor did I suggest that simply suggesting that she make changes to her approach was, in and of itself, harsh. I didn't see it as a question that needed answered because the answer is pretty obvious but this thread isn't about me. My life experiences do indeed have an effect on any advice I give to anyone but I didn't comment on this thread to give advice because lots already have. My original comment was highlighting how some people react totally differently to an op based on their age or sex. That's obviously one of the joys of being on fab but advising someone to look at common denominators is always going to be more helpful than telling them they look amazing and people must be idiots. " The answer may be obvious, but it was asked with intent that you might reflect upon how different your approach might have been at 21 years of age. Again, whatever about gender, is it totally unfitting to allow for the fact that the op simply hasn't had the same opportunity to gather life experience as the rest of us? And, that will naturally impact how she might navigate the site? I agree that she, potentially, needs to look at how she is approaching the site and who she engages with. However, I also think that there are men & women on here who never follow through with meeting, whatever their reasons. And, I simply think that some on here could maybe be a little less harsh in their expression. | |||
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"I'm struggling to see why the ops age or sex should mean different advice is given to what is offered to anyone else having repeated difficulties. Advising people who are doing the same thing over and over while expecting different outcomes that a different approach may be needed isn't harsh at all. It's common sense. "It's not you, it's them" isn't a particularly helpful mantra and doesn't offer any solutions. I disagree. Whatever about gender, have you not evolved since you were 21? Would you not have better ways of filtering people now? I think there is a lack of balance in your reply. A reply can be helpful, offering advice as to how she might improve her interactions on here, without being harsh. That's your opinion obviously but as the father of 3 young women in their 20s and 30s my comment is very balanced and based on experience. I haven't said the op is a poor judge of character or not mature enough to sniff out bs. The op was the one who chose to start a thread about whining men but appears to only want to be told to keep on doing what she has been doing despite that not working at all. I would offer the same advice to a 21 year old man regardless of whether it was fab related or not. Take a step back and you might find a way around the obstacle that prevents you moving forward. You didn't answer my question, but I would imagine that you have evolved since your early 20s, which I would also imagine influences some of the advice you offer your adult children. On the whole, I think your original reply lacks balance - could it not be a variety of factors? I certainly didn't advise the op to keep doing as she is doing, and neither did most others, nor did I suggest that simply suggesting that she make changes to her approach was, in and of itself, harsh. I didn't see it as a question that needed answered because the answer is pretty obvious but this thread isn't about me. My life experiences do indeed have an effect on any advice I give to anyone but I didn't comment on this thread to give advice because lots already have. My original comment was highlighting how some people react totally differently to an op based on their age or sex. That's obviously one of the joys of being on fab but advising someone to look at common denominators is always going to be more helpful than telling them they look amazing and people must be idiots. The answer may be obvious, but it was asked with intent that you might reflect upon how different your approach might have been at 21 years of age. Again, whatever about gender, is it totally unfitting to allow for the fact that the op simply hasn't had the same opportunity to gather life experience as the rest of us? And, that will naturally impact how she might navigate the site? I agree that she, potentially, needs to look at how she is approaching the site and who she engages with. However, I also think that there are men & women on here who never follow through with meeting, whatever their reasons. And, I simply think that some on here could maybe be a little less harsh in their expression. " I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. | |||
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" I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. " Okay, noted. I fail to see the relevance of the point made re. the op being 21 and on a swing site, where she may, or not, chat to people about sex. | |||
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" I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. Okay, noted. I fail to see the relevance of the point made re. the op being 21 and on a swing site, where she may, or not, chat to people about sex. " Neither do I. Hence why I made my first comment that seems to have confused you. | |||
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" I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. Okay, noted. I fail to see the relevance of the point made re. the op being 21 and on a swing site, where she may, or not, chat to people about sex. Neither do I. Hence why I made my first comment that seems to have confused you. " It hasn't confused me, as well you know.
And, I also think you are more than aware that I was commenting on the remark you made in your previous reply, particularly as you felt the need to comment on what she may, or may not, be discussing on here which, quite frankly, struck me as irrelevant and unnecessary. | |||
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" I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. Okay, noted. I fail to see the relevance of the point made re. the op being 21 and on a swing site, where she may, or not, chat to people about sex. Neither do I. Hence why I made my first comment that seems to have confused you. It hasn't confused me, as well you know.
And, I also think you are more than aware that I was commenting on the remark you made in your previous reply, particularly as you felt the need to comment on what she may, or may not, be discussing on here which, quite frankly, struck me as irrelevant and unnecessary. "I haven't mentioned the ops age at all in any of my comments. My original comment asked why it was relevant at all. You on numerous replies have made reference to it which is why I believe you are confused. The op is on a swing site chatting to men and arranging to meet for sex or socially with the possibility of sex. How those conversations are phrased is obviously the determining factor in people turning up or not. I didn't join this thread to offer advice, just to draw attention to the usual fab discrepancies so I won't be adding anything more to a conversation that in itself proves my original point. | |||
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"I think some of the replies on this thread are not only unhelpful, but also harsh. Thankfully, others are not. The op could, perhaps, improve upon her profile and her filtering of those she is engaging with, but I think it is quite unfair to suggest that she is the common denominator. There are so many people on here, both men and women, who are flaky, cancel, or never actually intend to meet socially. That is a reality. Unfortunately for the op, this has happened an inordinate amount of times, so to lessen that, she may need to come up with ways of filtering those she chooses to engage with. I don't think she should change her age range, if it is outside her preference. I do think that fleshing out her profile and having firm boundaries could help, as well as clear communication with those she chooses to engage with. I find that this helps to filter out the vast majority of fantasists, etc., Socials are also a great idea, if she is open to those. All the best O.P! I might have missed it but I didn't see anyone say she was the common denominator, only that if she reviewed all the interactions there may be a common denominator or trend within them. Certainly that was what I said and I was the one that used the phrase Hi, Yes, you used that phrase, suggesting that there must be a common denominator. My using the same phrase wasn't a pointed comment in your direction; apologies that it came across as such! It was simply the most fitting term as, while others didn't use that specific term, I do believe that they inferred/expressed just that. I maintain that some of those comments were merely unhelpful and/or harsh. Also, I think some of the commentary could have been expressed better, one of yours included. While I read the forums regularly and would think that, on the whole, you are quite balanced and fair, I am not sure that might have come across to the O.P. " I don't think that any of the posts have been unhelpful or harsh bar those that went off on a tangent between other fabbers and not directed at the OP. I'd also venture to say that the wording of the OP was phrased poorly and may have caused some of the off topic discussions. A single female wanting feedback and advice about struggling to get meets and the title is "Single Men Complaining". All in all I'd say the feedback to the OP has been alot more positive than the threads she referenced. And I think you are looking hard for examples where it hasn't been tbh | |||
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" I've no interest in reflecting on how I dealt with things when I was 21 because it has no relevance to this thread and aged 21 I was 9 years into being a carer, 1 year out from kissing a girl for the first time and still 4 years shy of having sex. Therefore my experiences are going to be completely different to a 21 year old on a swing site chatting to people about sex. Okay, noted. I fail to see the relevance of the point made re. the op being 21 and on a swing site, where she may, or not, chat to people about sex. Neither do I. Hence why I made my first comment that seems to have confused you. It hasn't confused me, as well you know.
And, I also think you are more than aware that I was commenting on the remark you made in your previous reply, particularly as you felt the need to comment on what she may, or may not, be discussing on here which, quite frankly, struck me as irrelevant and unnecessary.
I haven't mentioned the ops age at all in any of my comments. My original comment asked why it was relevant at all.
You on numerous replies have made reference to it which is why I believe you are confused.
The op is on a swing site chatting to men and arranging to meet for sex or socially with the possibility of sex.
How those conversations are phrased is obviously the determining factor in people turning up or not.
I didn't join this thread to offer advice, just to draw attention to the usual fab discrepancies so I won't be adding anything more to a conversation that in itself proves my original point. "Still not confused but, again, I think you know that.
I am unsure as to how the discussion proves your original point but I'll survive not knowing and it seems you will survive too, knowing you were right all along.  | |||
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"You’ve just had bad exp and can’t paint us all with same brush , I’ve never not turned up for a meet with any woman and I’m sure there’s many the same. Prob is an age thing , so just try older guys and see. I wasn’t painting everyone with the same brush, I’m just sharing my experience with the ones iv been chatting too(which has been a lot) maybe as you say it is the age thing. thank you "Well if you want to try older guys, I think you have plenty of interest in this thread, try PM’ing one or two of us older lads. Personally I’ve never not turned up to an arranged meet, that’s just rude | |||
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"I think some of the replies on this thread are not only unhelpful, but also harsh. Thankfully, others are not. The op could, perhaps, improve upon her profile and her filtering of those she is engaging with, but I think it is quite unfair to suggest that she is the common denominator. There are so many people on here, both men and women, who are flaky, cancel, or never actually intend to meet socially. That is a reality. Unfortunately for the op, this has happened an inordinate amount of times, so to lessen that, she may need to come up with ways of filtering those she chooses to engage with. I don't think she should change her age range, if it is outside her preference. I do think that fleshing out her profile and having firm boundaries could help, as well as clear communication with those she chooses to engage with. I find that this helps to filter out the vast majority of fantasists, etc., Socials are also a great idea, if she is open to those. All the best O.P! I might have missed it but I didn't see anyone say she was the common denominator, only that if she reviewed all the interactions there may be a common denominator or trend within them. Certainly that was what I said and I was the one that used the phrase Hi, Yes, you used that phrase, suggesting that there must be a common denominator. My using the same phrase wasn't a pointed comment in your direction; apologies that it came across as such! It was simply the most fitting term as, while others didn't use that specific term, I do believe that they inferred/expressed just that. I maintain that some of those comments were merely unhelpful and/or harsh. Also, I think some of the commentary could have been expressed better, one of yours included. While I read the forums regularly and would think that, on the whole, you are quite balanced and fair, I am not sure that might have come across to the O.P. I don't think that any of the posts have been unhelpful or harsh bar those that went off on a tangent between other fabbers and not directed at the OP. I'd also venture to say that the wording of the OP was phrased poorly and may have caused some of the off topic discussions. A single female wanting feedback and advice about struggling to get meets and the title is "Single Men Complaining". All in all I'd say the feedback to the OP has been alot more positive than the threads she referenced. And I think you are looking hard for examples where it hasn't been tbh" Well, we will have to agree to disagree so.
Yes, the title is somewhat misleading, but she did come back and respond to earlier comments, offering clarification.
No, not hard at all. It is there in plain sight for those who want to see.
Yes, there has been plenty of helpful feedback. However, there has also been unhelpful, harsh feedback, too.
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"Well the one thing this thread has shown is how many will try and get someone to change their preferences just in the hope of getting a shag anyhow.And despite some posts some have made on other threads on here personality,showing face pics,and getting to know the person etc is all irrelevant "Yeah seems to be strong correlation between desperation and willingness to meet | |||
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"Well the one thing this thread has shown is how many will try and get someone to change their preferences just in the hope of getting a shag anyhow.And despite some posts some have made on other threads on here personality,showing face pics,and getting to know the person etc is all irrelevant "Never underestimate a man's willingness to get his hole | |||
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"Poor form to arrange a meet and not show up. Maybe they have no pocket money ?" Or the meets were past their curfew?  | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "Their loss, your beautiful | |||
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"Nobody slagging the op for being young and yet young men are fair game....."
Posturing at its worst | |||
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"Nobody slagging the op for being young and yet young men are fair game.....
Posturing at its worst "Ooof! I can feel those eyes rolling all the way down here in Cork | |||
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"Nobody slagging the op for being young and yet young men are fair game.....
Posturing at its worst
Ooof! I can feel those eyes rolling all the way down here in Cork "Well at least I made you ooft | |||
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"Nobody slagging the op for being young and yet young men are fair game.....
Posturing at its worst
Ooof! I can feel those eyes rolling all the way down here in Cork
Well at least I made you ooft "Double OOF | |||
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"Well the one thing this thread has shown is how many will try and get someone to change their preferences just in the hope of getting a shag anyhow.And despite some posts some have made on other threads on here personality,showing face pics,and getting to know the person etc is all irrelevant "Ain't that the truth! | |||
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"Well the one thing this thread has shown is how many will try and get someone to change their preferences just in the hope of getting a shag anyhow.And despite some posts some have made on other threads on here personality,showing face pics,and getting to know the person etc is all irrelevant "I think you might see another side to this if you met a slightly younger range | |||
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"Well the one thing this thread has shown is how many will try and get someone to change their preferences just in the hope of getting a shag anyhow.And despite some posts some have made on other threads on here personality,showing face pics,and getting to know the person etc is all irrelevant
I think you might see another side to this if you met a slightly younger range "Smart ass | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "I'm a single bloke and it happens to me when someone asks me for a face pic.its gotten to the stage where I don't want to send face pics anymore | |||
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"All in all, very successful first post for the OP It has it all, Gripping subject matter Debate stimulating High level of interaction Large number of participants Gradually descends into farce and mud slinging" I'd imagine the op might see that differently... | |||
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"Nobody slagging the op for being young and yet young men are fair game....." Neither should be. | |||
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" Hi, Yes, you used that phrase, suggesting that there must be a common denominator. My using the same phrase wasn't a pointed comment in your direction; apologies that it came across as such! It was simply the most fitting term as, while others didn't use that specific term, I do believe that they inferred/expressed just that. I maintain that some of those comments were merely unhelpful and/or harsh. Also, I think some of the commentary could have been expressed better, one of yours included. While I read the forums regularly and would think that, on the whole, you are quite balanced and fair, I am not sure that might have come across to the O.P. It could be my comment you are referring to so and if it is I stand by my comment. If you are constantly being messed about by timewasters as the op says she has been then yes you should look inward and see if you can change how you interact with others. And I say this from my own experiences when I first joined here. I learned early on not to jump through hoops to prove anything to anyone else, not to engage in sex talk through cam or messages, not to send pics to the other person no matter how genuine they seem at the time. To basically spot those who are on here just blowing smoke up your ass and asking for wank material etc.At the start I had several guys mess me about and you know what it was my own fault for pandering to them. Since I stopped all that I've had zero issues since. Yes I don't chat to many on here cos plenty stop chatting once you won't jump through hoops for them but that is fine because those who I have chatted to are those who I have met and I've never been ghosted on here either. As in someone not showing up for a meet when we have arranged one. So the op can either take what I said as advise or ignore it. I didn't say anyone has to listen to anything I say on here I just gave my opinion just like I would to anyone who would ask the same question. It does amuse me though how the advice is a lot more brutal from a lot of people when a man asks something along the same lines and yet no one bats an eye at that. " | |||
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"Is this a joke?" No | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "wana meet ?  | |||
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"sensing clickbait" That was my 1st thought initially but then everybody kept replying so I thought it must be real for f*** sake | |||
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"sensing clickbait" Maybe maybe not, | |||
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"Their loss imo Thank you "Definitely their loss ... you look as hot as hell | |||
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"sensing clickbait" What is that??  | |||
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"Kinda like attention grabbing ... but for the purpose of drawing you to another area ... you know those small adds that make you click but end up trying to sell you some other shit "Thank you. I never heard of it before. | |||
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"Kinda like attention grabbing ... but for the purpose of drawing you to another area ... you know those small adds that make you click but end up trying to sell you some other shit
Thank you. I never heard of it before.
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"Kinda like attention grabbing ... but for the purpose of drawing you to another area ... you know those small adds that make you click but end up trying to sell you some other shit
Thank you. I never heard of it before.
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"Most guys in your age range will be on dating sites not swing sites. All the guys iv chatted with are in my age range and on here, can’t speak about the ones on dating sites as I’m speaking about the ones on here. So I can’t see your point really but thank you for your input. " Their loss - unfortunately, your out of my age range so I'm not even going to bother trying. It goes back to what your long term plans are. If it's just a random hook up or a regular fwb or perhaps something long term. At your age, I can assure you that the last thing I wanted was something long term - I did have a regular partner and there were a few fwbs before I completely dropped from this site only to come back nearly a decade later. Hang in there and be careful  | |||
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"I’m on here a year and iv been looking for a meet on numerous occasions and iv had one coffee meet and after that iv chatted and arranged to meet a lot of guys and each time when it comes to meeting, all goes silent. This is not me saying one or two guys, it’s been literally everyone. I have given my snap and have sent selfies and have had phone conversations to show I’m real and I know I’m no supermodel but I’m not the worst looking person either lol. Iv read loads of threads here with guys complaining that they can’t get meets and women have it easy on here, it’s far from easy and very frustrating. Hopefully some will prove my opinion I have on single guys here. "In fairness you can be let down by anyone on here, I've been let down last minute by both couples and single women before, agreed a place and meet up, told they are on the way and no showed or cancelled on 20 mins beforehand. Happens to everyone but lads get the worst rep seeing as they're the most common, but then again that's because there's 1000/1 profiles compared to women/couples  The law of averages is a bastard | |||
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"Funny how all the criticism of the OP's age limits are from men who are significantly outside those limits. What a wild random coincidence "Or the ones asking for coffee | |||
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"Funny how all the criticism of the OP's age limits are from men who are significantly outside those limits. What a wild random coincidence "Are men actually criticising these limits though? Or just suggesting she change them | |||
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"OP clearly I must not be in your age range as I cannot even see your profile, but given how you come across here and your thumbnail pic, I find it very hard that the guys you are looking to meet aren't jumping over themselves to actually meet you. " Who wants to tell him? | |||
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"OP clearly I must not be in your age range as I cannot even see your profile, but given how you come across here and your thumbnail pic, I find it very hard that the guys you are looking to meet aren't jumping over themselves to actually meet you. Who wants to tell him?" Meeeeee | |||
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"OP clearly I must not be in your age range as I cannot even see your profile, but given how you come across here and your thumbnail pic, I find it very hard that the guys you are looking to meet aren't jumping over themselves to actually meet you. " If you can’t see her profile either you’ve blocked her or she’s blocked you. Totes awky | |||
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"Funny how all the criticism of the OP's age limits are from men who are significantly outside those limits. What a wild random coincidence
Are men actually criticising these limits though? "Yes. Including the post directly before mine. "Or just suggesting she change them" "Your preferences don't suit me, you should change them" is a criticism. | |||
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"If you can’t see her profile either you’ve blocked her or she’s blocked you. Totes awky "......not awks at all Jaffa, as maybe the OP has me blocked because she knows me in the real world or maybe because I'm simply not to her liking. Either way, it's fine. | |||
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