FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Social first ... Right?
Social first ... Right?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hello all,
I have been wondering if I have been doing this wrong when messaging people. I tend to offer a social or phone chat to get to know each other when I message, as I can't imagine most people want to meet straight at someone's house.
Would you consider that normal? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Most people will do a social first.
Tbh I'd rather skip it but that's just me.
There is no normal, just what people are comfortable with "
I suppose it will come down to different strokes for different folks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Different strokes for different folks.
I have to have a social first. Need to see if there's an attraction in person. To hard to tell from a pic or in texts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, we usually consider a social meet to be required before deciding to have sex, that's what works for us. Not everyone is the same, each to their own. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are you offering the social because that's what you are comfortable with or what you think they may be more comfortable with?
Is the social a deal-breaker for you?
"
I don't mind skipping the social, I was thinking more other people would be wanting it. I try to Sus people out on the phone. |
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Last 2 women iv met (not off fab) I tried to arrange social first but was told to skip the social part. Now I had been chatting to them through text only for a while so we weren't total strangers but I was slightly surprised still. |
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"Are you offering the social because that's what you are comfortable with or what you think they may be more comfortable with?
Is the social a deal-breaker for you?
I don't mind skipping the social, I was thinking more other people would be wanting it. I try to Sus people out on the phone."
I won't meet without a social due to previous experience on here.
There are some women who insist on the first meet being in their own home. I've always refused those.
There's nothing wrong with offering a social or insisting on one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Last 2 women iv met (not off fab) I tried to arrange social first but was told to skip the social part. Now I had been chatting to them through text only for a while so we weren't total strangers but I was slightly surprised still. "
Well fair play to them, I have been rejected at socials so couldn't put myself in a situation where I'm ready to have fun he arrives and thinks no thanks and feck off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Last 2 women iv met (not off fab) I tried to arrange social first but was told to skip the social part. Now I had been chatting to them through text only for a while so we weren't total strangers but I was slightly surprised still. "
If I (female) were meeting alone, I would trust my own instincts, as a couple the social is to see if the dynamic is good between all |
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"Last 2 women iv met (not off fab) I tried to arrange social first but was told to skip the social part. Now I had been chatting to them through text only for a while so we weren't total strangers but I was slightly surprised still.
Well fair play to them, I have been rejected at socials so couldn't put myself in a situation where I'm ready to have fun he arrives and thinks no thanks and feck off. "
Yea. Well we were pretty much 100 percent gonna go back to hers anyway and 2nd one was a hotel meet and she would have been the one leaving if she wanted as I'd driven a good distance. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
It's whatever you both feel comfortable with
When I first joined I had meets with no socials first but over time realised my favorite meets are when I've had a social with the woman or couple involved |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a couple who mostly meets single men, we never have had a social first.
I think though if I (K) was meeting solo I'd want a social first unless it was someone I'd already established a rapport with over time.
The only downside is time. It can take me weeks to be free for a social and then weeks again to be free for the sex stuff by which stage the notion might have worn off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Out of respect i feel there should always be a social...if it morphs into something more, then well & good.
Respect for?"
For the person you are meeting...personally no interest in sleeping with someone i have not at least met socially |
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By *B 4099Man
over a year ago
North West, Outer Letterkenny area |
I like the social meet first. You are going in with no agenda. No pressure. Just see how you get on. And if it goes well for both , I think any future stuff the anticipation builds more. Maybe that's just me. |
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By *ndqtMan
over a year ago
The Wild West |
"Ive a couple of stories that would make your toes curl about not meeting for a social first "
Taser in the handbag Lolly 
All jokes aside, social would be very important imho. Just cant gauge chemistry thu text and pics. |
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"Most people will do a social first.
Tbh I'd rather skip it but that's just me.
There is no normal, just what people are comfortable with
I suppose it will come down to different strokes for different folks."
Exactly this,
Everyone is looking for something different. We ‘prefer’ to do a social first but Tabs could grab someone by the collar and say “I’m having you now” though  (She’s nice like that  ) |
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"Hello all,
I have been wondering if I have been doing this wrong when messaging people. I tend to offer a social or phone chat to get to know each other when I message, as I can't imagine most people want to meet straight at someone's house.
Would you consider that normal?"
I don't think there is a "normal". Its whatever suits people individually. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Most people will do a social first.
Tbh I'd rather skip it but that's just me.
There is no normal, just what people are comfortable with
I suppose it will come down to different strokes for different folks.
Exactly this,
Everyone is looking for something different. We ‘prefer’ to do a social first but Tabs could grab someone by the collar and say “I’m having you now” though (She’s nice like that )"
Sounds like a no bullshit type of lady!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Over the years, I have met in a hotel twice without meeting socially first. Awful....so never again!
I have met one guy socially, not a lot of chemistry. Covid happened, so we met again a while ago for a coffee, a little bit of chemistry there, and I went back to his. Not a great experience!
So always a social meet and always has to be good chemistry for more to happen for me.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Coffee is always a good start !!
Plus theres always the back seat if you decide to go any further
Yeno that dosent count as "Can Accommodate" "
Absolutely not!!!! |
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For us a social is a chance to see if there are any sparks between us and whomever we are having the social with as if there's no sparks there's no point in arranging a meeting for fun as it would most likely be a rather boring time for us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Coffee is always a good start !!
Plus theres always the back seat if you decide to go any further
Aaaww!!!  you are such a sweetheart. so very thoughtful of you!
Sorry for bursting your bubble !!
But in reality ive never done anything in the back seat on a first meet .
It's normally a coffee, chat and see if theres potential !!
Im really not that much of an idiot!!!
Just a thought
Oh,fuck it!! Do you provide pillows too? I might be interested I'm a classy chick
 damn i knew there was a reason nobody wanted to get into the back!!!
And some fluffy blankets
You can thank me later  
Ones that don't show the stains???
Oh ffs... you ruined all my images in head now "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Coffee is always a good start !!
Plus theres always the back seat if you decide to go any further
Aaaww!!! you are such a sweetheart. so very thoughtful of you!
Sorry for bursting your bubble !!
But in reality ive never done anything in the back seat on a first meet .
It's normally a coffee, chat and see if theres potential !!
Im really not that much of an idiot!!!
Just a thought
Oh,fuck it!! Do you provide pillows too? I might be interested I'm a classy chick
damn i knew there was a reason nobody wanted to get into the back!!!
And some fluffy blankets
You can thank me later
Ones that don't show the stains???
Oh ffs... you ruined all my images in head now "
Sorry for bursting your bubble !!
But in reality ive never done anything in the back seat on a first meet .
It's normally a coffee, chat and see if theres potential !!
Im really not that much of an idiot!!!
|
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"Coffee is always a good start !!
Plus theres always the back seat if you decide to go any further
Aaaww!!! you are such a sweetheart. so very thoughtful of you!
Sorry for bursting your bubble !!
But in reality ive never done anything in the back seat on a first meet .
It's normally a coffee, chat and see if theres potential !!
Im really not that much of an idiot!!!
Just a thought
Oh,fuck it!! Do you provide pillows too? I might be interested I'm a classy chick
damn i knew there was a reason nobody wanted to get into the back!!!
And some fluffy blankets
You can thank me later
Ones that don't show the stains???
Oh ffs... you ruined all my images in head now
Sorry for bursting your bubble !!
But in reality ive never done anything in the back seat on a first meet .
It's normally a coffee, chat and see if theres potential !!
Im really not that much of an idiot!!!
"
oh! I always shagging on them.lol
Why waste time?!
Could someone block me from posting on forums please? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think always offer a social first but if you click when you meet you never know.
So wash them sticky car blankets just in case lads"
I went home with a sweet wrapper stuck to my ass true story .. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"I think always offer a social first but if you click when you meet you never know.
So wash them sticky car blankets just in case lads
I went home with a sweet wrapper stuck to my ass true story .. "
Must have been a polo mint because of their slogan
The mint with the hole |
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"
so couldn't put myself in a situation where I'm ready to have fun he arrives and thinks no thanks and feck off. "
This in reverse too...they arrive on and your foof shuts up shop for the night!
For me personally, I'll do a social first for a number of reasons. I do believe it's a 'to each their own' call. |
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"Hello all,
I have been wondering if I have been doing this wrong when messaging people. I tend to offer a social or phone chat to get to know each other when I message, as I can't imagine most people want to meet straight at someone's house.
Would you consider that normal?"
Depends who your asking and what your looking for ... you do you bud  |
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By *ndqtMan
over a year ago
The Wild West |
"I think always offer a social first but if you click when you meet you never know.
So wash them sticky car blankets just in case lads
I went home with a sweet wrapper stuck to my ass true story .. "
Youre lucky it wasnt a wrapper for somthing less innocent |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think always offer a social first but if you click when you meet you never know.
So wash them sticky car blankets just in case lads
I went home with a sweet wrapper stuck to my ass true story ..
Youre lucky it wasnt a wrapper for somthing less innocent "
Lol ... true .. safe sex  |
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By *ostmaryWoman
over a year ago
Near you |
From a safety point of view as a single woman I definitely prefer a social first.
I think it eases everyone in and allows time to establish some sort of chemistry. If it ends up being more even better.
I’ve watched too many true crime documentaries at this point |
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