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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
I never really engage with forum stuff. Or at least very rarely but I need to vent.
I believed every word. For a long time. I trusted completely. I felt, both physically and emotionally. Though moreso physically. I was utterly duped. I am shocked and horrified by what I ended up being a part of, without any knowledge of it. I was completely convinced that there was reciprocated honesty. I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words. The levels and layers of lies and deception have broken me.
As much as I'd love to turn all Bunny Boiler over this pain; that is not who I am and more importantly I am disgusted that someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through this. I wish I could reach out. I know I can't.
I am sure there are people who will say I'm a moron for letting someone in, I understand that. I feel like a moron, don't worry. Way ahead of you.
Thanks for letting me let it out all the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I never really engage with forum stuff. Or at least very rarely but I need to vent.
I believed every word. For a long time. I trusted completely. I felt, both physically and emotionally. Though moreso physically. I was utterly duped. I am shocked and horrified by what I ended up being a part of, without any knowledge of it. I was completely convinced that there was reciprocated honesty. I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words. The levels and layers of lies and deception have broken me.
As much as I'd love to turn all Bunny Boiler over this pain; that is not who I am and more importantly I am disgusted that someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through this. I wish I could reach out. I know I can't.
I am sure there are people who will say I'm a moron for letting someone in, I understand that. I feel like a moron, don't worry. Way ahead of you.
Thanks for letting me let it out all the same. "
Hi OP i genuinely hope you are okay and I a good break is really good will help to get over this heartache, give it time.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thank you all for your kindness. It means the world. "
You deserve all the kindness and whatever it is try not be blaming yourself Ava, instead just be kind to yourself. xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Hi OP, sorry to hear…I just wanted to reach. I’ve seen on many platforms support for people who are grieving and hurting. It’s nice to see this on a sex site too.
"………I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words.
….. "
So I wanted to say that the first step to healing is self awareness. You know how you are feeling, that’s very important and well done to you for embracing that. The next things you do will really have an impact on how you feel right now. So try to ‘selfishly’ take care of yourself.
"……someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through I feel like a moron….. "
About this. All I can say from my personal experience is that when I was hurting because of other's actions or mistakes, I truly don’t think their apology would have done any difference to the pain I was going through, the damage was done. So in your situation, like for yourself, It’s up to them to heal and learn from this experience. You do your part with yourself and hope for the best for the other person. Guilt can be very torturing.
It’s been said that time is one of the best cures…hopefully it will go by fast.
hugs to you
P.
 |
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"Hi OP, sorry to hear…I just wanted to reach. I’ve seen on many platforms support for people who are grieving and hurting. It’s nice to see this on a sex site too.
………I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words.
…..
So I wanted to say that the first step to healing is self awareness. You know how you are feeling, that’s very important and well done to you for embracing that. The next things you do will really have an impact on how you feel right now. So try to ‘selfishly’ take care of yourself.
……someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through I feel like a moron…..
About this. All I can say from my personal experience is that when I was hurting because of other's actions or mistakes, I truly don’t think their apology would have done any difference to the pain I was going through, the damage was done. So in your situation, like for yourself, It’s up to them to heal and learn from this experience. You do your part with yourself and hope for the best for the other person. Guilt can be very torturing.
It’s been said that time is one of the best cures…hopefully it will go by fast.
hugs to you
P.
"
That's both wise and beautiful. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"Sorry, what?
Which bit can I help clear up for you? I definitely need the distraction.
How about explaining what specifically has happened? "
She doesn't have to really..you can read the pain in her post and as others have said...time is a great healer and Op...take care of yourself .... |
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"Sorry, what?
Which bit can I help clear up for you? I definitely need the distraction.
How about explaining what specifically has happened?
She doesn't have to really..you can read the pain in her post and as others have said...time is a great healer and Op...take care of yourself ...."
Hear hear! Thank you. It will take time but this too shall pass. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi OP, sorry to hear…I just wanted to reach. I’ve seen on many platforms support for people who are grieving and hurting. It’s nice to see this on a sex site too.
………I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words.
…..
So I wanted to say that the first step to healing is self awareness. You know how you are feeling, that’s very important and well done to you for embracing that. The next things you do will really have an impact on how you feel right now. So try to ‘selfishly’ take care of yourself.
……someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through I feel like a moron…..
About this. All I can say from my personal experience is that when I was hurting because of other's actions or mistakes, I truly don’t think their apology would have done any difference to the pain I was going through, the damage was done. So in your situation, like for yourself, It’s up to them to heal and learn from this experience. You do your part with yourself and hope for the best for the other person. Guilt can be very torturing.
It’s been said that time is one of the best cures…hopefully it will go by fast.
hugs to you
P.
"
 very well broken down and it has the world of truth empathy and understanding.  |
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Sending hugs .look after yourself but as trite as it sounds this too shall pass..been there and worn the shirt
People come into your life for one of 2 reasons a blessing or a lesson and the leeson can b harsh but u will get through this and emerge a stronger and wider person but for now it's ok to feel sad and my pm is always open if u need to vent |
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"Sending hugs .look after yourself but as trite as it sounds this too shall pass..been there and worn the shirt
People come into your life for one of 2 reasons a blessing or a lesson and the leeson can b harsh but u will get through this and emerge a stronger and wider person but for now it's ok to feel sad and my pm is always open if u need to vent "
Obs I meant wiser |
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"Hi OP, sorry to hear…I just wanted to reach. I’ve seen on many platforms support for people who are grieving and hurting. It’s nice to see this on a sex site too.
………I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words.
…..
So I wanted to say that the first step to healing is self awareness. You know how you are feeling, that’s very important and well done to you for embracing that. The next things you do will really have an impact on how you feel right now. So try to ‘selfishly’ take care of yourself.
……someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through I feel like a moron…..
About this. All I can say from my personal experience is that when I was hurting because of other's actions or mistakes, I truly don’t think their apology would have done any difference to the pain I was going through, the damage was done. So in your situation, like for yourself, It’s up to them to heal and learn from this experience. You do your part with yourself and hope for the best for the other person. Guilt can be very torturing.
It’s been said that time is one of the best cures…hopefully it will go by fast.
hugs to you
P.
very well broken down and it has the world of truth empathy and understanding. "
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
To everyone who has reached out, here and on other platforms: thank you. For listening. For your advice, words of wisdom and sympathy and empathy, for your care and understanding and hope.
It has been pointed out that the cause of the hurt may have multiple profiles and is laughing even now. It's possible. I'm ruling nothing out now. If so: Please treat people with more kindness in the future. I did not expect this cruelty from you. Please treat the other people hurt by this carefully.
For me: I don't want to stop trusting. I don't want to be a cynical, closed off, bitter pile of pain. After next weekend (can't wait, by the way!) I will take a break. For as long as it takes.
Love to all. |
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Sorry for your pain Ava.
I understand your refusal to stop trusting as I am the same… the day someone will really break us is when we stop trusting so let’s not give them the satisfaction. There are a lot of good trustworthy people out there and on Fab.
Take care of yourself Ava, big hugs
Celine xx |
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By *on11Man
over a year ago
cork |
"To everyone who has reached out, here and on other platforms: thank you. For listening. For your advice, words of wisdom and sympathy and empathy, for your care and understanding and hope.
It has been pointed out that the cause of the hurt may have multiple profiles and is laughing even now. It's possible. I'm ruling nothing out now. If so: Please treat people with more kindness in the future. I did not expect this cruelty from you. Please treat the other people hurt by this carefully.
For me: I don't want to stop trusting. I don't want to be a cynical, closed off, bitter pile of pain. After next weekend (can't wait, by the way!) I will take a break. For as long as it takes.
Love to all. "
.
Continue to be true to yourself, unfortunately others won't respect that but don't sink to their level.
Take a break to recharge & come back to us. |
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"To everyone who has reached out, here and on other platforms: thank you. For listening. For your advice, words of wisdom and sympathy and empathy, for your care and understanding and hope.
It has been pointed out that the cause of the hurt may have multiple profiles and is laughing even now. It's possible. I'm ruling nothing out now. If so: Please treat people with more kindness in the future. I did not expect this cruelty from you. Please treat the other people hurt by this carefully.
For me: I don't want to stop trusting. I don't want to be a cynical, closed off, bitter pile of pain. After next weekend (can't wait, by the way!) I will take a break. For as long as it takes.
Love to all.
.
Continue to be true to yourself, unfortunately others won't respect that but don't sink to their level.
Take a break to recharge & come back to us."
I'm sure I'll see some of you next week. It will be good to be with friends. x |
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My heart is in my throat for you. I’m so sorry. So many of us have opened our hearts to someone and been hurt.
But please PLEASE don’t let this change the core of you. You are someone who clearly is open to love and affection and something new and fun.
Don’t let this person ruin your soul. You’re worth more.
I WISH I could take you for a drink and give you a hug and some cake |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hope you feeling OK op, and its good to be able to say it out loud and know your not alone.
I've learnt unfortunately a long time ago most people are selfish and are out to get what suits them so I've learnt to not open myself to anyone, it's just easier xx |
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Those of us that feel intensely, fall hard and fast and end up hurt the most if it goes wrong.
Don’t stop feeling. Looking at you post and your responses you’re doing the right thing. Accept what’s happened, take some time to be angry and hurt and knowing that won’t overtake you and becoming your soul.
Love and strength OP, if you ever need someone to hold space for you whilst you feel your feelings let me know xx |
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"To everyone who has reached out, here and on other platforms: thank you. For listening. For your advice, words of wisdom and sympathy and empathy, for your care and understanding and hope.
It has been pointed out that the cause of the hurt may have multiple profiles and is laughing even now. It's possible. I'm ruling nothing out now. If so: Please treat people with more kindness in the future. I did not expect this cruelty from you. Please treat the other people hurt by this carefully.
For me: I don't want to stop trusting. I don't want to be a cynical, closed off, bitter pile of pain. After next weekend (can't wait, by the way!) I will take a break. For as long as it takes.
Love to all. "
Please please don’t stop trusting and loving. It’s the other person who has the issue (s) not you.
I really really hope you get through this terrible episode. And that in time, things may not seem so devastating and hurtful.
Unfortunately It’s terrible when someone who you trusted and loved - tries to destroy everything you built your life and dreams on.
Those people can be so selfish and hurtful- and so used to this type of behaviour, that it becomes natural to them.Your way better than them and their toxicity.
I wish you well .
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Sorry it's all so shite Ava, hope you enjoy the weekend antics, what ever they may bring and then just look after yourself and try to remember the huge amount of good on here and out there, out weighs all the dickheads that are out there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Truth
"I never really engage with forum stuff. Or at least very rarely but I need to vent.
I believed every word. For a long time. I trusted completely. I felt, both physically and emotionally. Though moreso physically. I was utterly duped. I am shocked and horrified by what I ended up being a part of, without any knowledge of it. I was completely convinced that there was reciprocated honesty. I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words. The levels and layers of lies and deception have broken me.
As much as I'd love to turn all Bunny Boiler over this pain; that is not who I am and more importantly I am disgusted that someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through this. I wish I could reach out. I know I can't.
I am sure there are people who will say I'm a moron for letting someone in, I understand that. I feel like a moron, don't worry. Way ahead of you.
Thanks for letting me let it out all the same. "
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By *j69funCouple
over a year ago
kildare |
"I never really engage with forum stuff. Or at least very rarely but I need to vent.
I believed every word. For a long time. I trusted completely. I felt, both physically and emotionally. Though moreso physically. I was utterly duped. I am shocked and horrified by what I ended up being a part of, without any knowledge of it. I was completely convinced that there was reciprocated honesty. I am disappointed and angry and hurt beyond words. The levels and layers of lies and deception have broken me.
As much as I'd love to turn all Bunny Boiler over this pain; that is not who I am and more importantly I am disgusted that someone else is hurting right now and I can't tell them how devastated I am to know that. I am so fucking sorry. I genuinely fell for it. I hope you get through this. I wish I could reach out. I know I can't.
I am sure there are people who will say I'm a moron for letting someone in, I understand that. I feel like a moron, don't worry. Way ahead of you.
Thanks for letting me let it out all the same. "
Hope all is OK x
Its always tough going tru things on your own but great to see that you can come here and release your inner taughts and receive some many kind words from people.
Hope your OK xxx.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ava sorry for your troubles and heartache.
Curious if a man put up such a thread, would he get as much sympathy"
Simple answer Nope but still shit thing to happen to anyone... I assuming fact someone else was hurt as well that one person had no knowledge of... someone was cheating ?? ... don't know why people just be honest .. yes I am married , yes I am seein someone least then if someone desires to meet ya least they know what they are getting into first. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ava sorry for your troubles and heartache.
Curious if a man put up such a thread, would he get as much sympathy"
It would depend on the man who posts it tbh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I had a sorta similar sutitation going on here "not in relation to op before anyone jumps to conclusions lol", but was seeing a lady who was for strict nsa fun and she decided to get feeling involved and put me in an awkward position. I asked on forums for advice and got some great support and advice from a lot of people, both male and female and ended up cooling it off with the lady. Care for her as a friend but when emotions and feelings get involved it really makes the sutitation awkward. I guess what I'm trying to say is to OP, if your hurt by things or that, it's better to take time away to gather yourself personally and move on and remember that there's always more out there. |
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"I had a sorta similar sutitation going on here "not in relation to op before anyone jumps to conclusions lol", but was seeing a lady who was for strict nsa fun and she decided to get feeling involved and put me in an awkward position. I asked on forums for advice and got some great support and advice from a lot of people, both male and female and ended up cooling it off with the lady. Care for her as a friend but when emotions and feelings get involved it really makes the sutitation awkward. I guess what I'm trying to say is to OP, if your hurt by things or that, it's better to take time away to gather yourself personally and move on and remember that there's always more out there. "
To be clear I had been told a thousand times he was completely unattached. I believed him. He and I were not in a relationship but I'm hurting for us both, me and her. And very awkwardly: for him. I care about him.
Moving on is the plan. After the weekend I'll take a break.
Thanks again to everyone here. |
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By * Va OP Woman
over a year ago
Dublin |
Also, because I've been asked so often: I never asked for more than what it was. More frequency sure. But not a relationship or any of the serious things I now know people are assuming. I cared. I am hurt by the adamant, consistent lies. I'm disgusted to have hurt someone else. I hate that my choice was taken away. Had it been a once-off I'd be shrugging and saying "my bad".
Whatever the other people choose to do now: I hope the best for you. I'm sorry this happened. |
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for your hurting heart xxxx
some people are not worthy of faith and trust...but life doesn't stop 