FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Tri sexuality
Tri sexuality
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"I’ve had a few cis male lovers over the years that are bi or - in some cases - tri (try anything). All of them were sexually bi. They were socially, romantically and physically straight. They would consider themselves bi in a “I enjoy another cock or some ass play with a woman occasionally” way. " I'm pretty much like that. Heteroromantic but pansexual, albeit with some caveats. As for terms ... Try-sexual sounds kinda try-hard. :p I personally like the term Hete  exible.  
The closest to that on Fab is "bi-curious" so I guess people like us are stuck with that for now.
And I couldn't care less about what men (or women) should and shouldn't do. Especially here on Fab we should be all sexually liberated and no one should feel like they have to do anything or be put into a box they'd rather not be in. Free your mind and your body will follow (or something like that). 
It is pride month after all!  | |||
"I personally like the term Hete exible.
"Haha, I guess I shouldn't write hetero-flexible in one word  | |||
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"When is the time going to come that people just be people without a label or sexual preference if i want to experience another woman then that’s my choice if he wants to experience another man some day then that will be his no one else’s " I really wonder that. I feel absolutely zero pressure to put a label on my sexuality as I absolutely view it as a spectrum. As a parent to a queer child, it’s the same. It’s on fab that the labels are required, women refusing to meet men to have stepped foot on the rainbow The reason for my discussionary post is to perhaps challenge those who exclude and ridicule those less r I was also hoping for a bit of a a,disc  | |||
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"I wouldn't consider a man who enjoyed ass play bi at all (because they enjoy that sensation). They would need to find men attractive for that. In fact it's perfectly possible for a gay man to not enjoy butt stuff and still be gay. I think we need to seperate the enjoyment of a sensation from the sexuality. " Have to agree with this, many men here enjoy pegging and anal sex, as do some ladies. Does that make them bi ? It definitely is the sensation | |||
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"I think people have evolved a huge amount socially over the last 10 years. Maybe it’s the interweb that’s opened a lot of peoples minds. Jesus can you imagine the suppression and buried desires people had years ago. I like the way it’s going now. Having consensual fun with people has made the whole thing a lot more sexy" It's mostly that we stopped believing the shite that the churches told us... that sexuality is shameful and only for reproduction between a man and his wife. It amazes me how many here hypocritically still pretend to live according to church rules, and yet go joyfully and enthusiastically searching to go against them on here. The sooner we drag ourselves out of the stone age the better. | |||
"So this is a mixed up post so bare/bear with me a bit. I’ve had a few cis male lovers over the years that are bi or - in some cases - tri (try anything). All of them were sexually bi. They were socially, romantically and physically straight. They would consider themselves bi in a “I enjoy another cock or some ass play with a woman occasionally” way. But is that what defines their sexuality? That they experiment? And why do the same rules not apply to women? I’ve played with women, albeit very select women, with glorious boobs or huge sexual appeal or simply a wonderful opportunity but I don’t consider myself bi. In any shape or form. And what label is attached to me when I occasionally enjoy ass play!!! So while men are harshly judged for experimentation, women are revered. Hmm!!!" I agree with Casual's response - men are traditionally expected to be masculine and strong but like women to be a lady in the streets and a slut between the sheets. Women's "promiscuity", to put it in an extreme term, is still frowned upon - certainly that is what I have experienced, particularly my generation and older. I mean - how many women here actively approach male profiles here over being "chased" themselves? A lot of women are still not liberated enough to even go after a man they're interested in, with an attitude of "I don't ask, I don't get" and men are still very much expected to do the chasing. I'm sure these things improve and change over time but it's still an attitude widely represented. I wonder how much of a sexual open-mindeness has to do with a person/woman being able to accept change and evolve through time. How much of it possibly has to do with women being victims of sex crimes? How much of it because sex is just still not being talked openly enough but rather with shame? And how does this translate to a society as a whole, changing and evolving and becoming more accepting? The conversations at my dinner table with my children (one of whom identifies as transgender) I'm sure are very different to many, many other Irish households. And these conversations I'm having, extend to my family - siblings, parents, cousins - obviously in order to transition my child into an open and accepting environment. The same *should* be done by those with sexualities out of the "norm" in order to educate and open the minds of those who haven't arrived there. The question therefore is are we doing enough as individuals to open up debate in our homes, with our friends in order to discuss these labels and that they really mean nothing in terms of causing anyone offense. Any person of legal age engaging in consensual sexual activity with another of legal age, regardless of sex, gender, sexuality, race, religion, relationship status, medical status should never be judged or discriminated against - as long as it takes place with discussed boundaries respected. You don't have to like it, just respect it!!! | |||
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"Labels, choices and preferences are always going to be around, I tend to avoid the whole labels element of it myself if I can, I don’t believe people or their preferences should be compartmentalised, it just isn’t as simple as that. Yes, I’ve definitely seen profiles stating no bi men but I don’t recall ever seeing a profile that said no bi women, but it’s a choice and should be respected, even if it isn’t understood. I think people and sexuality is much more fluid than that, I don’t necessarily think it can be so easily boxed off, and certainly not into the four categories available on Fab. What about situationally bi, or situationally curious, or flexible, the list goes on…." Yes they will always be around, mainly to assist the lazy and the narrow minded! It's mainly politics and sex where people have to be herded into a specific pen just because some people can't their heads around it. I consider myself straight, I love ass play and I think I would be tri-sexual in the right situation for me. Mrs has played with ladies and really enjoyed it, but she would not consider herself bi-sexual! I'd love to read up on the history of these labels, where they came from and why. I'm thinking somewhere between the fall of the Roman Empire and the beginning of the Dark Ages!!
Anybody recommend some reading? | |||
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"Labels, choices and preferences are always going to be around, I tend to avoid the whole labels element of it myself if I can, I don’t believe people or their preferences should be compartmentalised, it just isn’t as simple as that. Yes, I’ve definitely seen profiles stating no bi men but I don’t recall ever seeing a profile that said no bi women, but it’s a choice and should be respected, even if it isn’t understood. I think people and sexuality is much more fluid than that, I don’t necessarily think it can be so easily boxed off, and certainly not into the four categories available on Fab. What about situationally bi, or situationally curious, or flexible, the list goes on…." I agree with your first comment. Your last comment is interesting. Why should bisexuality be described as situational? I mean, my partner identifies as straight but I know that he won't go and fuck every woman he talks to (I think ). I know he won't consider having sex with a man, be that kissing, oral, anal, receiving or giving (at this point in time - whatever about fluidity as you mention, which I very much believe in).
If this is how you think, then naturally, someone who identifies as bisexual isn't going to hump every man or woman they talk to. They'll consider sex with those they are sexually attracted to. But they know they can be attracted sexually to both sexes and have (possibly) engaged - hence bi, be that bisexual or bicurious. It's situational, regardless of whether you are hetero or bi or gay because most people will have sex with who they're attracted to rather than anyone who fits that sex!
So this whole explaining away of being bisexual because you are sexually attracted to some men as well as some women is utter bullshit.
Some may feel the need to say it because boundaries may not always have been respected during an MMF for example.
I haven't used myself as an example because if asked, I simply wouldn't know how to label myself. I have not been with a woman but I do have fantasies, which, with the "right" woman in the "right" situation I'd consider putting into action. I have bicurious on my profile and think that this describes it best.
And I also think that this whole labelling and compartmentalizing is a really tough one. On one hand, when form filling, there need to be boxes which can be ticked but how far do you go...do you list all genders, all forms of sexuality - how many are there now...you'd never finish filling out a form...
That's why, here on Fab, there's a text section on your profile where you can talk about who you are and what you're looking for.
Respect those choices, they are boundaries and there for a reason, however unreasonable or silly they may sound to someone! And in some cases, we should be glad those preferences and boundaries are mentioned because potentially you're avoiding a toxic person or situation... | |||
"Agreed, I think we still live in a largely homophobic society. There are loads of profiles on here that state specifically: "absolutely no bi men"" A lot of women like a man to be masculine. Some women consider a bi-sexual man to not be masculine enough for them. Why? I don't know! | |||
" A lot of women like a man to be masculine. Some women consider a bi-sexual man to not be masculine enough for them. Why? I don't know!" I know, but imagine they meet the perfect man that they are extremely attracted to in every way. Then they find out that he is bisexual. It would be so weird to think they would no longer be attracted to them | |||
" A lot of women like a man to be masculine. Some women consider a bi-sexual man to not be masculine enough for them. Why? I don't know! I know, but imagine they meet the perfect man that they are extremely attracted to in every way. Then they find out that he is bisexual. It would be so weird to think they would no longer be attracted to them" Maybe afraid of more competition | |||
