FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Women no shows
Women no shows
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I know Single lads get a lot of stick on here and rightly so for the most case, I've had to deal with a few nutjobs myself, but has anyone else seemed to experience a lot of no shows from women on here? I know men get blasted for no showing at the last minute but in the last year I've not met anyone outside of an event because of women no showing e.g chatting to a woman, we agree a meet date the following week/future in time and then they drop off the face of the earth, yet Men are the absolute evil if they do the same. Am I mad or is no one else seeing the double standard here?  |
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Is that a no show or someone just stopping chatting to you? I honestly wouldn't put a lot of stock in potential plans until its confirmed on the day by both parties.
Par for the course around here im afraid. |
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"Is that a no show or someone just stopping chatting to you? I honestly wouldn't put a lot of stock in potential plans until its confirmed on the day by both parties.
Par for the course around here i'm afraid. "
It's a mix of both, some the talk has stopped just a day short of the meet others it has been hours/minutes before the meet. As in asking for the time/place to meet up on the day and you're just left in the void |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A no show is shitty no matter who it is. And to be honest I've never seen anyone say anu different so I think your kinda creating an argument that doesn't exist
There are so many more men here so male noshows are just more visible |
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"A no show is shitty no matter who it is. And to be honest I've never seen anyone say anu different so I think your kinda creating an argument that doesn't exist
There are so many more men here so male noshows are just more visible "
That's why I'm creating the argument as you only ever hear of Men no showing, I've never hear of woman/couple no showing. For example I was due to meet a Hotwife couple this weekend, so even though it was mainly the woman I was speaking to the male half is at fault too if neither show up. My argument is simple that there's a lot of double standards on here, not trying to justify what a lot of lads do on here because I know a vast majority of them are eejets as I've had to deal with them, but the way most people seem to go on is that men are bad but women/couples can do no wrong so single lads have to jump through hoops to prove they're not wasters only to left deserted at the so called finish line.  |
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"Both sexes are guilty of this for sure. Just block and move on, don't engage with people who don't respect your time. "
Oh I know, not trying to put the blame 100% on the other side, but you may not know how tricky it is for a single lad on here, first off a vast majority of profiles have you blocked from the start simply because of what you are(yes I know some profiles only want couples or females) but others have single lads blocked due to previous experience of no shows. The annoying thing is that when you build up a relationship/respect of time but once it comes to meeting up for a meet within the 48 hour range 90%have backed out without communication, whereas as a single profile you'd be hung and quartered for, but women and couples are never not held to account  |
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Agreeing to meet some time in future without confirming on the day is not a no show.
A no show is a last minute cancellation or well a no show at the agreed time and location.
We have had zero no shows from women together and individually.
We have had 1-2 couples pull out last minute.
Only 3-4 single guys in last 3 years showed up as planned without any last minute cancellations for any reason.
Last no show we had was a single guy, last Wednesday. He asked if we would meet him for a coffee to help him get verified so he could come to our m&g, we set time and date, checked in a day before, checked in Wednesday morning. 1h before said meet he decided that time and place wasn't convenient for him any more.
After me explaining to him that I was sick as a dog for over 4 days and already had my hands full with many things including work, family social organizing etc, so was really going out of my way to meet him, to do him a favour, so he can get to experience the good side of fab (meeting lots of new people at the social) he called me stuck up, huffed about it and gently pointed out that the world doesn't revolve around me
So no, OP, I must disagree with your statement, women are a lot less likely to do a no show.
What you're experiencing is women changing their minds about meeting you well in advance.
Happened to me many times when I was single as well as part of a couple:
You chat to someone, all is good, agree to meet some time in future and conversation turns somewhere you don't want it to go or personality traits pop up that you know for sure you'll be incompatible, so you just don't meet them.
Missus |
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"Agreeing to meet some time in future without confirming on the day is not a no show.
A no show is a last minute cancellation or well a no show at the agreed time and location.
We have had zero no shows from women together and individually.
We have had 1-2 couples pull out last minute.
Only 3-4 single guys in last 3 years showed up as planned without any last minute cancellations for any reason.
Last no show we had was a single guy, last Wednesday. He asked if we would meet him for a coffee to help him get verified so he could come to our m&g, we set time and date, checked in a day before, checked in Wednesday morning. 1h before said meet he decided that time and place wasn't convenient for him any more.
After me explaining to him that I was sick as a dog for over 4 days and already had my hands full with many things including work, family social organizing etc, so was really going out of my way to meet him, to do him a favour, so he can get to experience the good side of fab (meeting lots of new people at the social) he called me stuck up, huffed about it and gently pointed out that the world doesn't revolve around me
So no, OP, I must disagree with your statement, women are a lot less likely to do a no show.
What you're experiencing is women changing their minds about meeting you well in advance.
Happened to me many times when I was single as well as part of a couple:
You chat to someone, all is good, agree to meet some time in future and conversation turns somewhere you don't want it to go or personality traits pop up that you know for sure you'll be incompatible, so you just don't meet them.
Missus "
So what do call agreeing to a meet up and then never showing up? As I've had to agree to a date in future as most people I talke to don't meet at the drop of a hat(as most of the general population would) we agree a point in time as everyone has stuff happening in their lives, people aren't free every weekend but if you agree to meet next weekend then by Friday you cut off all communication and avoid the person, what is that called?
Fair point I get from your experience but from someone who mainly meets women's as not many couples want to meet a lad, most of the times I've communicated it's been with the woman of the couple still get a no show regardless/or ghosting I suppose is the more accurate term but if it's a pre agreement on a date and then later fail to confirm they will show. In my books is a no show, if you agree to show up/meet at a certain date and time and fail to explain any delay or failure to meet that, is a no show. |
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By *ancy38Woman
over a year ago
galway |
"I know Single lads get a lot of stick on here and rightly so for the most case, I've had to deal with a few nutjobs myself, but has anyone else seemed to experience a lot of no shows from women on here? I know men get blasted for no showing at the last minute but in the last year I've not met anyone outside of an event because of women no showing e.g chatting to a woman, we agree a meet date the following week/future in time and then they drop off the face of the earth, yet Men are the absolute evil if they do the same. Am I mad or is no one else seeing the double standard here? "
There can be valid reasons for a no show from both sexes. Its when they blank you and don't give a reason for it which can be frustrating. |
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"I know Single lads get a lot of stick on here and rightly so for the most case, I've had to deal with a few nutjobs myself, but has anyone else seemed to experience a lot of no shows from women on here? I know men get blasted for no showing at the last minute but in the last year I've not met anyone outside of an event because of women no showing e.g chatting to a woman, we agree a meet date the following week/future in time and then they drop off the face of the earth, yet Men are the absolute evil if they do the same. Am I mad or is no one else seeing the double standard here?
There can be valid reasons for a no show from both sexes. Its when they blank you and don't give a reason for it which can be frustrating. "
Exactly, my issue is that it's becoming too common, if it was a 1/5 incident I'd let it slide but the other meets I've got the last few years have been from social events as everyone else drops out of a meet last minute or ghosts you leading up to the agreed date/time meet |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show |
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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
I'm still struggling to see exa5 what the point of all this is. Avoiding getting into the semantics of what a no show is, I don't ever remember seeing the vast majority of people saying there's nothing wrong with a woman arranging a meet and not showing up. |
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"I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show "
So what you would call an agreed meeting time and place and then no one showing up. What in your mind do you call that? |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show
So what you would call an agreed meeting time and place and then no one showing up. What in your mind do you call that? "
I've said thats a no show
Just wondering do you arrange everything a week in advance and assume its going ahead or do you stay in touch and confirm on the day ..... |
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"I'm still struggling to see exa5 what the point of all this is. Avoiding getting into the semantics of what a no show is, I don't ever remember seeing the vast majority of people saying there's nothing wrong with a woman arranging a meet and not showing up. "
define what exa5 is please?
You don't remember seeing that because the vast majority of people don't discuss that topic.im merely calling out the lack of criticism on that matter whereas when I joined the site I was already at a disadvantage because I was a single lad and they are already seems as being mis-trustful that you have to jump through hoops just to get the conversation rolling in regards to obtaining a meet only to then be disregarded without any notice, which of course would get you blacklisted here whereas when a woman or couple does it, there is no issue. I'm simply calling out the double stranded on here as well as as the fact that none of us like to have our time wasted  |
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"I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show
So what you would call an agreed meeting time and place and then no one showing up. What in your mind do you call that?
I've said thats a no show
Just wondering do you arrange everything a week in advance and assume its going ahead or do you stay in touch and confirm on the day ....."
You you go back and re-read my previous comments you'll find the answer there, but in case you're too lazy to do that, seeing as the answers were already there.
Yes I plan them in advance as myself, like many others don't meet at the drop of a hat, my issue is that the communication drops either before the agreed meet or hours shortly before the meet. So yes, I do plan and greet in advance because I'm considerate of other people's social lives and don't expect a "meet and fuck" withing an hour of talking unless that's what you're suggesting is the better option that I message people requesting we meet and fuck in a short space of hours, which we all know is ridiculous |
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"Reading other threads it does seem to happen to couples and single women"
I never said it only happens to single men, just that single men only seem to be punished for it. I've had numerous couples and women within the last year doing the same. Just that it happens more to single men but because single men are bottom of the tier, it doesn't matter a fuck but when it happens to women/couples it's treated like a crime against nature, double standards is all.
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show
So what you would call an agreed meeting time and place and then no one showing up. What in your mind do you call that?
I've said thats a no show
Just wondering do you arrange everything a week in advance and assume its going ahead or do you stay in touch and confirm on the day .....
You you go back and re-read my previous comments you'll find the answer there, but in case you're too lazy to do that, seeing as the answers were already there.
Yes I plan them in advance as myself, like many others don't meet at the drop of a hat, my issue is that the communication drops either before the agreed meet or hours shortly before the meet. So yes, I do plan and greet in advance because I'm considerate of other people's social lives and don't expect a "meet and fuck" withing an hour of talking unless that's what you're suggesting is the better option that I message people requesting we meet and fuck in a short space of hours, which we all know is ridiculous "
Definitely not the best option for most people ...mind you it works for some men on here so who knows |
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"I wouldn't call arranging a meet for some unspecified day / time/ location and not finalising it as a no show
I'd call a no show someone not turning up or on the day of an actual arranged meet going silent a no show
So what you would call an agreed meeting time and place and then no one showing up. What in your mind do you call that?
I've said thats a no show
Just wondering do you arrange everything a week in advance and assume its going ahead or do you stay in touch and confirm on the day .....
You you go back and re-read my previous comments you'll find the answer there, but in case you're too lazy to do that, seeing as the answers were already there.
Yes I plan them in advance as myself, like many others don't meet at the drop of a hat, my issue is that the communication drops either before the agreed meet or hours shortly before the meet. So yes, I do plan and greet in advance because I'm considerate of other people's social lives and don't expect a "meet and fuck" withing an hour of talking unless that's what you're suggesting is the better option that I message people requesting we meet and fuck in a short space of hours, which we all know is ridiculous
Definitely not the best option for most people ...mind you it works for some men on here so who knows "
Well then you must have missed most of my points then  as I've stated that I've tried to "play the game" as what's best laid out on here by most people yet it does no good. |
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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
"I'm still struggling to see exa5 what the point of all this is. Avoiding getting into the semantics of what a no show is, I don't ever remember seeing the vast majority of people saying there's nothing wrong with a woman arranging a meet and not showing up. define what exa5 is please?
You don't remember seeing that because the vast majority of people don't discuss that topic.im merely calling out the lack of criticism on that matter whereas when I joined the site I was already at a disadvantage because I was a single lad and they are already seems as being mis-trustful that you have to jump through hoops just to get the conversation rolling in regards to obtaining a meet only to then be disregarded without any notice, which of course would get you blacklisted here whereas when a woman or couple does it, there is no issue. I'm simply calling out the double stranded on here as well as as the fact that none of us like to have our time wasted "
Exactly. Fat fingers.
Not discussing a topic isn't double standards though. Double standards would be if people said that women not showing up is perfectly acceptable. |
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"I'm still struggling to see exa5 what the point of all this is. Avoiding getting into the semantics of what a no show is, I don't ever remember seeing the vast majority of people saying there's nothing wrong with a woman arranging a meet and not showing up. define what exa5 is please?
You don't remember seeing that because the vast majority of people don't discuss that topic.im merely calling out the lack of criticism on that matter whereas when I joined the site I was already at a disadvantage because I was a single lad and they are already seems as being mis-trustful that you have to jump through hoops just to get the conversation rolling in regards to obtaining a meet only to then be disregarded without any notice, which of course would get you blacklisted here whereas when a woman or couple does it, there is no issue. I'm simply calling out the double stranded on here as well as as the fact that none of us like to have our time wasted
Exactly. Fat fingers.
Not discussing a topic isn't double standards though. Double standards would be if people said that women not showing up is perfectly acceptable. "
Yes but the fact that's vacancy in people calling out women/couple no showing People, there's your double standard as whenever a man no shows there are posts of, none there of for women and couples, that's the double standard. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe people just move on and forget about it. Maybe they don't feel the need to call it out.
Incidentally, if someone dropped off the face of the earth/didn't confirm a meet/stopped communicating we'd probably assume they were no longer interested. We definitely wouldn't be expecting them to turn up ergo we wouldn't call them a no-show.
If it were me, I'd also question were the people definitely women/couples and maybe rethink how I go about things in the future too. |
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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
"I'm still struggling to see exa5 what the point of all this is. Avoiding getting into the semantics of what a no show is, I don't ever remember seeing the vast majority of people saying there's nothing wrong with a woman arranging a meet and not showing up. define what exa5 is please?
You don't remember seeing that because the vast majority of people don't discuss that topic.im merely calling out the lack of criticism on that matter whereas when I joined the site I was already at a disadvantage because I was a single lad and they are already seems as being mis-trustful that you have to jump through hoops just to get the conversation rolling in regards to obtaining a meet only to then be disregarded without any notice, which of course would get you blacklisted here whereas when a woman or couple does it, there is no issue. I'm simply calling out the double stranded on here as well as as the fact that none of us like to have our time wasted
Exactly. Fat fingers.
Not discussing a topic isn't double standards though. Double standards would be if people said that women not showing up is perfectly acceptable.
Yes but the fact that's vacancy in people calling out women/couple no showing People, there's your double standard as whenever a man no shows there are posts of, none there of for women and couples, that's the double standard."
I've no idea why anyone would post about no shows in the first place really. In saying, maybe women do in fact do it less often and you could be somewhat of the exception to the rule?
Consistly being no showed on I'd say is fairly rare. |
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By *asual777Man
over a year ago
i travel all over |
Not no shows as such but too late to make alternative plans types of postponements . The ratios mean that it’s generally a more accepted occurrence than single blokes doing it but I never make the first attempt to reschedule |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To me a no show is me sitting in a coffee shop or a bar and to meet at 5pm and by 6pm I'm still sitting in my own.
If i chat to someone and arrange to meet on a certain date and time and than here nothing at all vetween the chat and the time to meet up I call that been ghosted, or he got a better offer.
Its happened to me, for my birthday, chatting to a guy who is all on for meeting up, we pick a date and time ( my actual birthday which im spending in a beautiful hotel for) and than he is offline completely with no contact whatsoever , not a word not a text and a few weeks later I get a message again " oh when we meeting" that to me is a tyrekicker who is keeping his options open and not actually putting any effort in to meet. |
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By *wimfit68Man
over a year ago
Wareham/london |
"I know Single lads get a lot of stick on here and rightly so for the most case, I've had to deal with a few nutjobs myself, but has anyone else seemed to experience a lot of no shows from women on here? I know men get blasted for no showing at the last minute but in the last year I've not met anyone outside of an event because of women no showing e.g chatting to a woman, we agree a meet date the following week/future in time and then they drop off the face of the earth, yet Men are the absolute evil if they do the same. Am I mad or is no one else seeing the double standard here? Yes seems to be a big issue here. I can understand changing your mind but to just ignore with no justification when plans are set is nasty. Lack of respect in general from too many people. "
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This is why so-called 'cliques' (God I hate that word!) exist, because so many people are flaky on here. We like to stick with people who are well-established on the scene because they tend to be more reliable. There are exceptions of course but the risk is much lower in general. Mrs  |
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By *j47Man
over a year ago
limerick |
"This is why so-called 'cliques' (God I hate that word!) exist, because so many people are flaky on here. We like to stick with people who are well-established on the scene because they tend to be more reliable. There are exceptions of course but the risk is much lower in general. Mrs "
Jayus i dont know some well verified people think its ok to not show up and tender no appoligy or explaination no reflection on your selfs but its happened |
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"I know Single lads get a lot of stick on here and rightly so for the most case, I've had to deal with a few nutjobs myself, but has anyone else seemed to experience a lot of no shows from women on here? I know men get blasted for no showing at the last minute but in the last year I've not met anyone outside of an event because of women no showing e.g chatting to a woman, we agree a meet date the following week/future in time and then they drop off the face of the earth, yet Men are the absolute evil if they do the same. Am I mad or is no one else seeing the double standard here? "
As you asked the question... I think you're a bit mad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see a double standard here. I think what you are actually noticing is some women take it to the forum and give out and men don't. Could be some men are afraid about looking like assholes and getting a few blocks or maybe don't care enough. But I'd be very surprised if the ratio of men to women doing this was anywhere near close.
What you have described to me is a no show however what may not have been clear is how your interaction was going with the person in question from the time the meet was arranged until the point in time where you realized it wasn't gonna happen. Regardless of which it's just ignorant and bad manners. Nobody likes to have their time wasted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You know who seems to give out the most about single men never showing? Other single men who are complaining that it somehow reflects badly on them."
God damn single men ruining my chances |
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"This is why so-called 'cliques' (God I hate that word!) exist, because so many people are flaky on here. We like to stick with people who are well-established on the scene because they tend to be more reliable. There are exceptions of course but the risk is much lower in general. Mrs
Jayus i dont know some well verified people think its ok to not show up and tender no appoligy or explaination no reflection on your selfs but its happened"
Yep, there are exceptions as I said |
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We've been having parties and events for a while now. We have regular single guys who never let us down or cancel so we are aware that it's not ALL single men. However, if we invite 10 new single ladies (by new I mean people who have never been invited before) and 10 new single men. MAYBE 1 lady may not show up but AT LEAST 5 single men will not show up.
Single guys are a nightmare when it comes to organising anything.
So the reason you hear about single men more is because they flake out more than women do. |
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By *ombikerMan
over a year ago
the right side of the river |
I’m my humble experience for example if you organise a party and 30 people confirm they are coming then you would be lucky if 10 actually turn up.
And not just kinky parties, could be organising a bus to a concert or match or organising a bbq or whatever people do in the “normal” world.
If you are going to be out of pocket then you would want to be getting deposits off people.
Sometimes people have genuine reasons but a lot of times they just can’t be bothered to make the effort or get last minute cold feet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Theres also alot of escorts on here too,who dangle the bait,with several messages to you.
Meet is arranged,and and then they ask you to bring a 100 euro financial gift with you.
Go fuck right off with yourself. |
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» Add a new message to this topic
just looking for more people to call out it, not saying I'm the first case, as I'm clearly not 
