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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How many fabbers have thought of or tried it, i think i am going through that phase again lol. I done it once lasted 4 months but i did feel good but its extremely difficult...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship."
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never had to go through celibacy nor would I wish to, the longest we would have gone without sex would have been no more than a few weeks..but having said that I remember the orgasm was mind-blowing  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Have done 8 yrs without any intimacy or sex, since joining here longest been without is a year "
Wow 8 years how did you feel about it in that time? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long? "
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went through a phase of been sedative celibate. I was single and suffering with my mental health really bad. I couldn't deal with the dynamics of bringing someone into my inner space and the effort of making conversation with someone made my skin crawl. I did it for 6 months, during that time I focused on myself and it did help me alot. 6 months later I was eager to go and get on that horse again.
Good luck in what ever you choose. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea "
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell. "
I hear you |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I didn't have sex for years before I joined fab. Mainly because I got fed up of relationships and the guys I had met in the previous year or so the sex was crap so I just kinda thought why bother and just then life especially work at the time got busy and years passed by before I realised. It was a chat with my best friend and me telling her I missed sex but didn't want to to the whole dating thing led me to fab and well i haven't looked back since. |
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I think it's easier for women; the longer we go without, the easier it gets but it's probably the opposite for the guys. I too can see no benefit in forced celibacy, it's more a religious (i.e. pointless) thing isn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I done a no fap for 6 months and I found every so often I would get a crippling pain in my groin area, I though it was just from playing rugby but I got with a girl during one of the painful days and things happened and as soon as I popped the pain vanished so everytime the pain started I popped myself and relised it was a build up, so never again am I doing that |
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell. "
Mind yourself Cat  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think it's easier for women; the longer we go without, the easier it gets but it's probably the opposite for the guys. I too can see no benefit in forced celibacy, it's more a religious (i.e. pointless) thing isn't it?"
It's not forced when it's a conscious decision and it's not a religious one with me either. It's more a health issue and to aid me find more of myself while soul searching. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship."
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I haven’t had sex for 10 years due to a very complicated friendship/relationship that went in a very complicated direction, which has led me to not being able to emotionally disconnect myself from that person. I still talk to her almost every single day but it’s too complicated to explain and I seriously doubt anyone would understand the predicament that I’m in  |
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By *asual777Man
over a year ago
i travel all over |
"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell. "
Sorry to hear Cat |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven’t had sex for 10 years due to a very complicated friendship/relationship that went in a very complicated direction, which has led me to not being able to emotionally disconnect myself from that person. I still talk to her almost every single day but it’s too complicated to explain and I seriously doubt anyone would understand the predicament that I’m in "
Have you considered seeing a therapist? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I done a no fap for 6 months and I found every so often I would get a crippling pain in my groin area, I though it was just from playing rugby but I got with a girl during one of the painful days and things happened and as soon as I popped the pain vanished so everytime the pain started I popped myself and relised it was a build up, so never again am I doing that "
Whatever about celibacy, regular ejaculation is important for prostate health |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How many fabbers have thought of or tried it, i think i am going through that phase again lol. I done it once lasted 4 months but i did feel good but its extremely difficult... "
If..IF you ever wanna talk or chat about it do not hesitate to get in touch .  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat "
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon. |
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By *affa31Woman
over a year ago
Galway |
Does celibacy include no masturbation?
No harm in abstaining from casual sex if it’s not doing your head good but I don’t think that depriving yourself of sexual pleasure completely is the way to go…for me anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon. "
Oh no, sorry to hear that  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon.
Oh no, sorry to hear that "
It's heart breaking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon. "
Jeez..am so so sorry to hear you have to put your dog down this afternoon as well , nothing is more loyal than a dog , l had to do it twice before to dogs who were my soulmates, a huge huge hug to you . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon.
Jeez..am so so sorry to hear you have to put your dog down this afternoon as well , nothing is more loyal than a dog , l had to do it twice before to dogs who were my soulmates, a huge huge hug to you ."
I am just lying here with her now in an awful way, just spending the last few hours with her. I have put down my other dog of 16 a few years ago aswell so i know what it's like but it still doesn't make it any easier. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon.
Jeez..am so so sorry to hear you have to put your dog down this afternoon as well , nothing is more loyal than a dog , l had to do it twice before to dogs who were my soulmates, a huge huge hug to you .
I am just lying here with her now in an awful way, just spending the last few hours with her. I have put down my other dog of 16 a few years ago aswell so i know what it's like but it still doesn't make it any easier. "
Sympathies as I have been there and in bits ans totally broken hearted but there is consolation in having time to say good bye and also ensuring they don’t suffer. Thoughts are with you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have done 8 yrs without any intimacy or sex, since joining here longest been without is a year
Wow 8 years how did you feel about it in that time? "
I didn't miss it, up until joining fab any sex I had was meaningless, one night stands with guys I knew, guys who had no interest in a relationship so I was "safe" , I couldn't get hurt emotionally, for me it was a case of getting them off as quick as possible so I could have the intimacy of a cuddle.
I had no self worth, hated myself and my body for a long long time and I'm still a work in progress, I was always the " fat, funny friend" everyone wanted to be friends and thought I was great crack but not girlfriend material, or if I was noone ever said it. It got to the stage I just didn't feel I deserved love or happiness so I shut myself off from everyone plus getting quite publicly rejected a few times just put me off even trying.
Since joining here ever with the abuse or negativity I've received I have learnt I'm allowed enjoy sex, allowed to want sex, allowed to feel desired, allowed to feel wanted. I don't want random meaningless sex now I deserve better don't get me wrong I Don't want a full on relationship either, I'm so long on my own I actually don't think I could cope been with someone.
Cat you have my number and if you ever need to chat I'm there for ya, sorry about your wee doggie too xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon.
Jeez..am so so sorry to hear you have to put your dog down this afternoon as well , nothing is more loyal than a dog , l had to do it twice before to dogs who were my soulmates, a huge huge hug to you .
I am just lying here with her now in an awful way, just spending the last few hours with her. I have put down my other dog of 16 a few years ago aswell so i know what it's like but it still doesn't make it any easier. "
Being honest , it's one of the hardest things to do . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Have done 8 yrs without any intimacy or sex, since joining here longest been without is a year
Wow 8 years how did you feel about it in that time?
I didn't miss it, up until joining fab any sex I had was meaningless, one night stands with guys I knew, guys who had no interest in a relationship so I was "safe" , I couldn't get hurt emotionally, for me it was a case of getting them off as quick as possible so I could have the intimacy of a cuddle.
I had no self worth, hated myself and my body for a long long time and I'm still a work in progress, I was always the " fat, funny friend" everyone wanted to be friends and thought I was great crack but not girlfriend material, or if I was noone ever said it. It got to the stage I just didn't feel I deserved love or happiness so I shut myself off from everyone plus getting quite publicly rejected a few times just put me off even trying.
Since joining here ever with the abuse or negativity I've received I have learnt I'm allowed enjoy sex, allowed to want sex, allowed to feel desired, allowed to feel wanted. I don't want random meaningless sex now I deserve better don't get me wrong I Don't want a full on relationship either, I'm so long on my own I actually don't think I could cope been with someone.
Cat you have my number and if you ever need to chat I'm there for ya, sorry about your wee doggie too xxx"
Thank you, i am on my own to long aswell 7 years single found fab after about a year and half or so single so it was perfect then. But now i feel lots of the same things you have mentioned above aswell, trying to build can good relationship with myself is the hardest really. I am still just finding myself and being "different" isn't easy sometimes. |
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By *oguish1Man
over a year ago
Carrigrohane |
"How many fabbers have thought of or tried it, i think i am going through that phase again lol. I done it once lasted 4 months but i did feel good but its extremely difficult... "
I'm not sure i like the sound of this ....... Coolcat how have you or would you take celibacy?sexual activity with others ? Self pleasure ? I would not be able to last 3 days when it comes to self pleasure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have done 8 yrs without any intimacy or sex, since joining here longest been without is a year
Wow 8 years how did you feel about it in that time?
I didn't miss it, up until joining fab any sex I had was meaningless, one night stands with guys I knew, guys who had no interest in a relationship so I was "safe" , I couldn't get hurt emotionally, for me it was a case of getting them off as quick as possible so I could have the intimacy of a cuddle.
I had no self worth, hated myself and my body for a long long time and I'm still a work in progress, I was always the " fat, funny friend" everyone wanted to be friends and thought I was great crack but not girlfriend material, or if I was noone ever said it. It got to the stage I just didn't feel I deserved love or happiness so I shut myself off from everyone plus getting quite publicly rejected a few times just put me off even trying.
Since joining here ever with the abuse or negativity I've received I have learnt I'm allowed enjoy sex, allowed to want sex, allowed to feel desired, allowed to feel wanted. I don't want random meaningless sex now I deserve better don't get me wrong I Don't want a full on relationship either, I'm so long on my own I actually don't think I could cope been with someone.
Cat you have my number and if you ever need to chat I'm there for ya, sorry about your wee doggie too xxx"
Glad you are doing good now, we all deserve to be happy especially with ourselves and you are just as special and unique as all of us regardless of what others may say or think |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer. "
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol. |
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By *oguish1Man
over a year ago
Carrigrohane |
"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer.
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol. "
CoolCat my thoughts are with you ..... I cant say i know what you are feeling but remember we stand with you.... I feel genuine love flowing to you. |
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Oh cat we have a dog to so understand a tough time as for going without sex I couldn't do it I'm enjoying myself to much we always had a good sex life given time and energy with kids, work not always a priority. But since joining fab my view about sex and the whole experience of pleasure is just to much to deny ourselves and have met genuine people enjoy the company of others it's great |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
As a direct consequence of having attended schools that were controlled by members of various religious orders and the priesthood, and having been propagandised daily at school and by devout members if the laiety, I have a profound antipathy towards any mention of celibacy.
The Roman Catholic church from top to bottom has been obsessed by sex, sexuality, virgins, virginity, fornication, masturbation and celibacy for centuries.
Sex is the most natural activity that humans can engage in, and unless there is some medical reason it should be engaged in as frequently as possible.
Celibacy is unnecessary and unnatural, and is profoundly damaging to one's mental health and wellbeing.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sometimes celibacy's a sign of stress. Especially if you find you aren't attending to your own needs. Other times it's a bit like that first training session at the gym - you just need to get it out of the way and you're straight back in the saddle, so to speak  |
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Ive had long periods of celibacy while living abroad, up to 18 months. But my longest was 4 years, while in a relationship. I nearly went mad. But, masturbating and ejaculation are important for mental and prostate health, so that kept me going. |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
" To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon. "
I can really empathise with you about having to say goodbye to your beloved loyal canine companion today; go through the natural grieving process and then if you can adopt another one. It is really tough; I was absolutely devastated about having to have my dog put to sleep, but he was in extreme pain, from bone cancer, so it was by far the kindest thing to do, for him.
Talk over your profound loss with friends who are dig lovers; they will understand your loss.
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
"I didn't have sex for years before I joined fab. Mainly because I got fed up of relationships and the guys I had met in the previous year or so the sex was crap so I just kinda thought why bother and just then life especially work at the time got busy and years passed by before I realised. It was a chat with my best friend and me telling her I missed sex but didn't want to to the whole dating thing led me to fab and well i haven't looked back since."
Every cloud has a silver lining; you have been through a dark period, but now you know precisely the path you want to take. Success! |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
I seem to have been doing it for 6mths now. There was no verbal discussion, just no reciprocated intimacy in the bedroom. Outside of bedroom plenty of kissing and hugging but never any progression. This is marriage and I have to put up with it until some mystical floodgates open and our sexual coupling will be astounding.
Let's say that I don't think Paddy Power will give me good odds on it this year 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sometimes happens that sex takes a back seat in my life, and I couldnt even say how long has been the longest ... months more than years though.
Learn to love and live in your body in other ways if you dont feel like sharing yourself with someone else. Dance, swim, get a massage, or even give yourself one.
Be gentle with yourself
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By *asual777Man
over a year ago
i travel all over |
"I seem to have been doing it for 6mths now. There was no verbal discussion, just no reciprocated intimacy in the bedroom. Outside of bedroom plenty of kissing and hugging but never any progression. This is marriage and I have to put up with it until some mystical floodgates open and our sexual coupling will be astounding.
Let's say that I don't think Paddy Power will give me good odds on it this year
"
The really good thing JD about a specific website which deals with sexless marriages (which shall remain nameless otherwise I ll get a ban ) is that it answers some of these questions for you.
Is sexless a total lack : no . It’s 10 times a year or less
Do mystical floodgates re-open : rarely . Sexless marriage turnarounds are rare
Are there game changers ? Yes actually genuinely making efforts to leave are game changers . Everything else like reset sex is just a short term red herring
Should I stay or should I go ? Well it depends on your family and money set up
And so on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No thank you, having been forced into it at times by illness, I would not deliberately deprive myself of one of life's greatest pleasures, especially when it's an important part of my primary relationship.
I understand and that's why i feel i should do it without going into it to much. It's interesting to see peoples views on it, may i ask how you felt when you did do it and for how long?
Well because I was unwell, I didn't want sex, but that had a negative impact on my relationship (not my current one). You never know when life will turn and your sex life could abruptly end, I see no benefit in deliberately depriving oneself, unless there are other issues around it impacting negatively on physical and/or mental wellbeing, in which case taking a step back for a while might be a good idea
Yes this is how i am feeling the meaningless sex is doing nothing for me. To use or be used isn't making me feel good a such maybe it's just currently because i'm going through a tough time aswell.
Sorry to hear Cat
It's okay i am dealing with it but it's a struggle and i said i would share here with my fab friends because i know there is really good people on here. To make things worse i must say goodbye to my dog today she will be going to sleep in the afternoon. "
Hey , l hope you're ok today , you had a tough tough day yesterday l know , today just start by being kind to yourself , it's never easy having to say goodbye to a life long friend such as a dog , believe me l've been through it but today just be kind to yourself , a huge huge hug to you . |
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"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer.
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol. "
LOLOL!!
How did yesterday go? Did you sleep at all? Such a shit day. |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
"I seem to have been doing it for 6mths now. There was no verbal discussion, just no reciprocated intimacy in the bedroom. Outside of bedroom plenty of kissing and hugging but never any progression. This is marriage and I have to put up with it until some mystical floodgates open and our sexual coupling will be astounding.
Let's say that I don't think Paddy Power will give me good odds on it this year
The really good thing JD about a specific website which deals with sexless marriages (which shall remain nameless otherwise I ll get a ban ) is that it answers some of these questions for you.
Is sexless a total lack : no . It’s 10 times a year or less
Do mystical floodgates re-open : rarely . Sexless marriage turnarounds are rare
Are there game changers ? Yes actually genuinely making efforts to leave are game changers . Everything else like reset sex is just a short term red herring
Should I stay or should I go ? Well it depends on your family and money set up
And so on "
Cheers Casual.
PM me that website please.
10 times a year?
I feckin wish! |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
Apologies Cat.
Just reread thread,as I posted from bottom reading
Sorry to hear about the loved one and it's never easy, having had to do similar over my 50+yrs but at least you know that you are making it easier for them.
Wish Irish law was changed to letting us do the same for ourselves but hey ho!
Don't leave the self love too long or you may need to redecorate the bedroom when you rediscover yourself 
Be happy and know that Fabbers are here to help if you need them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer.
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol.
LOLOL!!
How did yesterday go? Did you sleep at all? Such a shit day. "
It was and still is horrible, i keep going to the door opening and closing it, oh the heart ache. Kept busy thd weekend so didn't over think about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Apologies Cat.
Just reread thread,as I posted from bottom reading
Sorry to hear about the loved one and it's never easy, having had to do similar over my 50+yrs but at least you know that you are making it easier for them.
Wish Irish law was changed to letting us do the same for ourselves but hey ho!
Don't leave the self love too long or you may need to redecorate the bedroom when you rediscover yourself
Be happy and know that Fabbers are here to help if you need them "
If i only could redecorate it i would be delighted all in good time. I know i just have lots of things going on the past few months and the build up is just getting to me. Trying to be super women lol. |
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"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer.
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol.
LOLOL!!
How did yesterday go? Did you sleep at all? Such a shit day.
It was and still is horrible, i keep going to the door opening and closing it, oh the heart ache. Kept busy thd weekend so didn't over think about it. "
Oh gof that’s really shit. I still pick up the phone to call my Dad so it must be really raw thinking you still hear your pupper scratching. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh shit COOLCAT!!! I’m so fucking sorry oh god you poor thing. I wish i was closer.
Thanks but if you were closer i would probably change my mind on the celibacy lol.
LOLOL!!
How did yesterday go? Did you sleep at all? Such a shit day.
It was and still is horrible, i keep going to the door opening and closing it, oh the heart ache. Kept busy thd weekend so didn't over think about it.
Oh gof that’s really shit. I still pick up the phone to call my Dad so it must be really raw thinking you still hear your pupper scratching. "
Yeah I keep thinking I hear her at the door or making noises to come in . Oh sorry to hear about your Dad I also know that deep loss of a parent, i remember getting a message a few days after my mother passed from her phone . It freaked me out and still don't know who sent it I asked my family did they message me from her phone they said no. |
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