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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Happy new year fabbers
I need some good advice on how to end a relationship. I’ve never actually broken up with someone before - I’ve just packed a bag and headed for the hills in the past but that’s not the right way too go about things either.
Answers on a postcard please. |
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Firstly, have the reasons you are leaving clear in your head. Be able to explain them in a kind, but honest way.
Have the conversation and explain it all in a compassionately and fairly.
...unless there is any kind of a abuse in the relationship. If there is then fuck em, they don't deserve an explanation |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unless you sit the person down and explain the relationship isnt working for you and you want to end things. Better to be honest "
This, and stick to your guns when they try to dissuade, love-bomb, get friends/family on their "side". Be kind but firm, it's your life |
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"Firstly, have the reasons you are leaving clear in your head. Be able to explain them in a kind, but honest way.
Have the conversation and explain it all in a compassionately and fairly.
...unless there is any kind of a abuse in the relationship. If there is then fuck em, they don't deserve an explanation"
i agree mostly. Recently i listened to a guy talk who spoke about his relationship. His view of it was it was perfect, except for a arguments here and there. She explained to him she felt controlled and belittled. He was unaware of this behaviour in himself and only realised his errors when she pointed out one of two things. Not all, but some people are unaware of certain behaviours in themselves. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I've done it and I've just been truthful and do it face to face not through text or a call.If you are certain you don't want to continue don't let them sway you by promising to change etc just be firm but kind and especially if it is going to come out of the blue for them. |
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By *ol_ieMan
over a year ago
Dublin west |
Write them a letter. Sit them down and give it to them and let them read it.
It puts how you are feeling down on paper so you can deliver it without things getting over heated.
It's never easy but you need to have the conversation to get some closure |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Eat all his cereal and put the box back in the press... repeat for the milk, butter and tea.
Now there's an odd way of trying to get rid of someone - has it worked for you in the past 
"
I'd have thought breaking his PS controller would get the message across |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Eat all his cereal and put the box back in the press... repeat for the milk, butter and tea.
Now there's an odd way of trying to get rid of someone - has it worked for you in the past
I'd have thought breaking his PS controller would get the message across"
Your trying to break up not crush his whole life... christ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Eat all his cereal and put the box back in the press... repeat for the milk, butter and tea.
Now there's an odd way of trying to get rid of someone - has it worked for you in the past
I'd have thought breaking his PS controller would get the message across
Your trying to break up not crush his whole life... christ"
Killing two birds with one stone |
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By *3nsesMan
over a year ago
Dublin |
On the back of Jay's advice I'd suggest going toa pub and ordering your favourite cold beverage for the both of you.
Hard to find a good two for the price of one deal now's a days so make the most of the opportunity.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Eat all his cereal and put the box back in the press... repeat for the milk, butter and tea.
Now there's an odd way of trying to get rid of someone - has it worked for you in the past
I'd have thought breaking his PS controller would get the message across
Your trying to break up not crush his whole life... christ"
Trying to break up, might cursh that person's life. So sometimes it's not clear cut or easy. And that's on both sides. It's a hard thing to get right. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ya have to be cruel to be kind. Most of us were on the receiving end of being dumped and at end of the day it's not the end of the world for the person although they might feel that way. Be honest and say it how it is. How you feel why you feel like ending it and maybe just explain what they have Done or not done to you to make you want to end it or there's no right or wrong way to do it.obviously if any children involved it can be a bit harder but maybe its best for all parties in the long run. Best of luck anyway and hopefully it ends well and little or no emotional pain for anyone involved |
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By *indenMan
over a year ago
Naas which is South West of Dublin |
"Be honest, but give them a real reason, the not knowing why is always the crap bit. Even if it's an honest, I just don't fancy you or bored. Good luck x"
Exactly this…. |
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By *ettaManMan
over a year ago
Kerry and Dublin |
"Firstly, have the reasons you are leaving clear in your head. Be able to explain them in a kind, but honest way.
Have the conversation and explain it all in a compassionately and fairly.
...unless there is any kind of a abuse in the relationship. If there is then fuck em, they don't deserve an explanation"
+1 |
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By *ettaManMan
over a year ago
Kerry and Dublin |
"Write them a letter. Sit them down and give it to them and let them read it.
It puts how you are feeling down on paper so you can deliver it without things getting over heated.
It's never easy but you need to have the conversation to get some closure "
+1
This will help you to say everything you need to say without being interrupted or sidetracked and it allows you to phrase things more carefully.
Try not to "soften the blow" by saying something which might leave an avenue open for staying together. |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
If you want out because of the other person's unreasonable behaviour, communicate your feelings and leave.
If the other is prone to rages, threats or violence be extremely careful where and when you break the news.
In an abusive relationship, the most dangerous time is just after you have left.
Disregard any promises to change. If possible, choose a safe public place and have a friend nearby to assist if necessary.
Be really honest with yourself why you want it to end, and set it out in writing, but tell your former partner honestly, face-to-face, maturely.
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