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Dad Jokes

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Come on... Give us your best one

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By *orkcouple81Couple over a year ago

west

I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What gives milk and has one horn.

A milk lorry .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/09/21 20:48:14]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wanna hear a joke about a ghost???

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What kind of bees make milk?

Boo Bees

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Two cannibals talking,

"What's for dinner?" said the first,

"Left over stew, " said the second,

"Fucks sake, " replied the first, "not him again. "

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By *issusWoman over a year ago

Belfast

"Wanna hear a joke about a ghost???"

Yes!

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By *issusWoman over a year ago

Belfast

Knock knock

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Knock knock "

Who's there?

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By *orkcouple81Couple over a year ago

west

[Removed by poster at 10/09/21 21:45:39]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Wanna hear a joke about a ghost???

Yes! "

That's the spirit

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By *issusWoman over a year ago

Belfast

"Knock knock

Who's there?"

Kenya

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Knock knock

Who's there?

Kenya "

Kenya who?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2.."

Called mine Sam and Liam

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2..

Called mine Sam and Liam

Leave my twins out of this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2..

Called mine Sam and Liam

Leave my twins out of this

Best cups goin

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday present..

I can't wait to see her face light up when she opens it..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2..

Called mine Sam and Liam

Leave my twins out of this

Best cups goin

You might get to lift one someday

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What did the drummer call his twin girls?

Anna 1,Anna 2..

Called mine Sam and Liam

Leave my twins out of this

Best cups goin

You might get to lift one someday

Am injured

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By *issusWoman over a year ago

Belfast

"Knock knock

Who's there?

Kenya

Kenya who?"

Kenyaaaaaa feeeeel the looooove tonight?

(Good luck getting it out of your head tomorrow

)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have a Polish friend who is a sound engineer........ And a Czech one two

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By *asual777Man over a year ago

i travel all over

[Removed by poster at 11/09/21 06:38:36]

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By *asual777Man over a year ago

i travel all over

A man with loose bowels sees his Gp. He gets told he has hereditary diarrhoea . How do you know he says . The Gp says because it’s all over your jeans

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By *exgalWoman over a year ago

Wexford

My friend is not happy because i keep stealing her kitchen utensils, but it's a whisk I'm willing to take.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Albert Einstein was a genius..... But his brother Frank was a monster

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By *elfastblondMan over a year ago

Belfast

"A man with loose bowels sees his Gp. He gets told he has hereditary diarrhoea . How do you know he says . The Gp says because it’s all over your jeans

And it runs in the family

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Manchester United player Danny Wellbecks father Stan worked in the army's bomb disposal unit

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Whats red and bad for your teeth?

A brick

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Had an interview for a blacksmith job once.

"Have you ever shoed a horse?"

"No, but I told a donkey to fuck off once"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What did the toaster say to the bread?

I want you inside me

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By *rakesterlingMan over a year ago

Dublin

I made a belt out of watches once...

It was a waste of time...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches…..

A nervous wreck !

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By *atherjackhackettMan over a year ago

Tipperary

Man goes to his doctor and says "Doc, I shit every morning at 8 o clock". "Good" says the doc. "Now what's the matter"? "I wake at 9" says the man.

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By *onny17Man over a year ago

Dublin

What you you call an Irish James bond?

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By *ebel_LionMan over a year ago

cork

How do you know Jesus was Irish?

1. He lived at home with his folks till he was 30

2. He had a dozen drinking buddies

3. His mother thought he was God, and he was convinced she was a virgin

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By *og-ManMan over a year ago

somewhere

Mary was confiding in her mate,

"Julie, you know what? I can't get any guy to sleep with me and it's all because my fanny smells of onions."

"Don't worry", her mate says, "I know a guy that has no sense of smell, he will sleep with you."

Half way through the couples lovemaking, he says to her, " Ere, your fanny reeks of onions."

"How would you know?" she says, "you have no sense of smell what so ever."

He says, "Yeah, I know, but I can't stop crying."

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By *eralt80Man over a year ago

cork

So I was in a pharmacy the other day and waking down the vitamin aisle when a stack of omega3 bottles fell on me. Don’t worry I only suffered super fish oil injuries

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just rang gamblers anonymous they said it’s too early ring back at 20 to 1

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By *s LollyWoman over a year ago

The pub then supermacs ...

Did ye hear about the circus fire?

It was in-tents....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My good friend Gavin died last night from an overdose of heartburn tablets , I can’t believe Gavisgon ??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?" "Because if they flew over the bay, we'd call them bagels.

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By *exy Ruby 100 300Couple over a year ago

unknown

What do you call a male with a rubber toe,Ruberto lol

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By *umpingJackFlashMan over a year ago

Anywhere

Whats orange and sounds like a parrot.....................a carrot. S....ing the barrel now.

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By *uriousVoyeurMan over a year ago

Northside

Biddy and Mary were selling fruit on their stalls in Moore St. After a while Biddy says "Mary,will we play I spy? I'll go furst!!" Mary says "Ah gwan then...". "Roight so... I spy wit my lil eye, sumtin beginnin wit N".

"Is ih a Napple?"

"No"!

"Is ih a Norange"?

"No"!

"I give up...warrisih"?

"It's a Nunion"!!!!!!