FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > What women want
What women want
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Ladies can i just ask whats with all the blocking.
Ive been here a couple of months and i swear ive been blocked by 10 times more women than I've had replies off. Got blocked there because i sent a message to a lady in limerick, she replied to me going mad that i contacted her without having a profile pic, i have a profile lic, my face just aint in it. said i was disrespecting her and not listening to her and i would not get far on here.
1st thing, this bird did not have a face in her profile pic, her body was, as is mine, yet shes blocked me, how does that make any sense.
Im not a sleaze and i generally send messages with a bit of work in them, i am definitely guilty of sending a couple of ones without the effort because i guess as men will know you gotta change it up, sometimes an effort message gets no reply whereas a quick hi sexy might actually.
Anyways the above is kinda born out of frustation because man this place is tough, like the irish health service, its grand ince you're in the system, its getting into the system is the problem
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in short, women get inundated with mails. they control the site. there is about 5:1 ration of men to women on here. roll into that also that men dont look for the same things in alot of cases before a meet is considered ie, for alot of men meets come easy, they dont for women. also alot of women wont meet one to one and prefer meets and greets and parties when things were normal. use this site as a stop gap but dont use it as your main outlet |
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I think you might misunderstand what she meant by a profile pic. It's not a face pic, it's the pic you choose to show next to your username at the top of your profile. You have no pic there so it can be off-putting for some. Go into your pic management section and you'll see an option to set one if your pics as your profile pic. Good luck  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why have you the need to call any woman a ‘bird’? Show a bit of respect. "
oh just stop come on so you have never said a good looking woman is a fine bird
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Ahhh ok, you are right i totally misunderstood and i didn't know that was a thing. Ok so shit if i had known this i wouldn't habe had to write the post because there wouldn't have been the issue. However the level of rudeness was quite horrible from that lady but i accept it was my mistake that caused the issue.
Oh well, thanks very much for your help, cheers |
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Yeah that makes total sense, didnt realise it was anything like 5 to 1 but yeah is understandable with women getting inundated with messages...
Sorry probably shouldn't have posted i just could not get over the rudeness of this woman because of a mistake |
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"Do you want to know a secret I learned many years ago about women???
Is that there is no single "what women want" it's as if they are individual sentient beings  "
Class man thanks for your help, i guess Mel Gibson really regrets that movie. Im sure statements like that help you get some though, fair play. Id rather be myself and be blocked for it |
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By *aid backMan
over a year ago
by a lake with my rod out |
"Do you want to know a secret I learned many years ago about women???
Is that there is no single "what women want" it's as if they are individual sentient beings
Class man thanks for your help, i guess Mel Gibson really regrets that movie. Im sure statements like that help you get some though, fair play. Id rather be myself and be blocked for it"
Oh sorry I thought your original post was you trying to be funny not a serious post. Ok I'll give a very serious answer from what I've picked up from you post and profile.
They don't like being called birds and they don't like your only profile pic being your cock at a very bad angle. That's just two I could go on if you want me to point out all the other mistakes you'd have to wait as I don't have that much time today.
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"Do you want to know a secret I learned many years ago about women???
Is that there is no single "what women want" it's as if they are individual sentient beings
Class man thanks for your help, i guess Mel Gibson really regrets that movie. Im sure statements like that help you get some though, fair play. Id rather be myself and be blocked for it
Oh sorry I thought your original post was you trying to be funny not a serious post. Ok I'll give a very serious answer from what I've picked up from you post and profile.
They don't like being called birds and they don't like your only profile pic being your cock at a very bad angle. That's just two I could go on if you want me to point out all the other mistakes you'd have to wait as I don't have that much time today.
"
Ah of course another who seeks to demean rather than assist. Cheers bro for the passive aggression, much appreciated, you take care |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The reasons why I would block a man here .
If he is rude or derogatory towards me .
If he cannot take me saying no Thanks to him.
Also if he is persistent and a bit of a pest.
I don't block for petty reasons I know I'm polite but if someone does get argumentative with me I will not back down and will stand my ground . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be fair the op messaged me earlier today he wasn't rude or abusive quite the opposite actually, he was polite and complementary I told him I wasn't interested in perusing conversation and he politely thanked me for the reply |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
Op
Do you read profiles before sending out messages
Do you make sure that your attributes match what she's actually put in her profile
In short were you offering her exactly what she was looking for
That what she means by disrespecting her...did she say no messages from blank profiles |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be fair the op messaged me earlier today he wasn't rude or abusive quite the opposite actually, he was polite and complementary I told him I wasn't interested in perusing conversation and he politely thanked me for the reply"
Well there is an answer the OP needs . This is what women want. So OP just be patient and be as you were to this lady. |
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"To be fair the op messaged me earlier today he wasn't rude or abusive quite the opposite actually, he was polite and complementary I told him I wasn't interested in perusing conversation and he politely thanked me for the reply
Well there is an answer the OP needs . This is what women want. So OP just be patient and be as you were to this lady. "
what you said is true to an extent but for men on here actively pursuing a meet, there is patient and then there is totally taking the piss. it cant be viewed in that light at the moment as were living with covid. |
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"To be fair the op messaged me earlier today he wasn't rude or abusive quite the opposite actually, he was polite and complementary I told him I wasn't interested in perusing conversation and he politely thanked me for the reply"
Thanks very much for your honesty here, very much appreciated and again happy fabbing |
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"Op
Do you read profiles before sending out messages
Do you make sure that your attributes match what she's actually put in her profile
In short were you offering her exactly what she was looking for
That what she means by disrespecting her...did she say no messages from blank profiles "
She did say no messages from blank profiles which is fine and actually my mistake as i said on this thread. I also said it to her and apologised a couple of times. When i apologise for something, i dont expect to be spoken to the way this lady spoke to me. I expext to receive as much respect as i give
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"in short, women get inundated with mails. they control the site. there is about 5:1 ration of men to women on here. roll into that also that men dont look for the same things in alot of cases before a meet is considered ie, for alot of men meets come easy, they dont for women. also alot of women wont meet one to one and prefer meets and greets and parties when things were normal. use this site as a stop gap but dont use it as your main outlet "
5:1 more like 50 or 500:1 |
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Put it simply your profile needs work, a few decent pics can do wonders, girls and couples make a split second decision and move on and you profile pic is a defenite turn off for them, and sorry i dont mean to be harsh but sure look if you dont try and adjust these things you are just wasting your time , fair play for putting yourself out here in the forums as they are quite toxic, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you refer to women as "birds" i would do the same OP. Also you think this is a "system" you know it's not a work place. I don't know OP i thínk your going about it the wrong way here. Definitely put more work into your profile to help present yourself how you are in real life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Op
Do you read profiles before sending out messages
Do you make sure that your attributes match what she's actually put in her profile
In short were you offering her exactly what she was looking for
That what she means by disrespecting her...did she say no messages from blank profiles
She did say no messages from blank profiles which is fine and actually my mistake as i said on this thread. I also said it to her and apologised a couple of times. When i apologise for something, i dont expect to be spoken to the way this lady spoke to me. I expext to receive as much respect as i give
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Try not to have any expectations OP and just have good patience. More pictures definitely yes more interaction s on here is good because you will get to know people and people get to know you. Good luck with it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Women get numerous messages . I know I couldn’t be bothered to reply to one liners or profiles with no photos ( especially the ones that call themselves handsome but with no photo evidence  )
It’s difficult for men on here But then again I don’t do sympathy shags so I wait for the quality profiles and delete / block / ignore the rest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Didn’t someone one start a book on this ........ o that’s right they haven’t finished
Keep changing their mind on the conclusion "
And they keep running out of paper  |
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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago
on the hill NordWest of |
"Didn’t someone one start a book on this ........ o that’s right they haven’t finished
Keep changing their mind on the conclusion
And they keep running out of paper "
We're rather advanced and actually use a computer to write it. Once it's finished you can download it, good luck with the latter. |
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"However the level of rudeness was quite horrible from that lady but i accept it was my mistake that caused the issue.
Oh well"
There are all sorts of people on Fab and other dating sites and regardless of men to women ratio, no one should be rude to someone.
She could have just ignored you or even better, delete your message.
The women are far more complex than men and you are probably better to block her too, put a note on that profile and move on.
Plenty of nice and down to earth women on Fab, that you will eventually get to chat and meet, once all this Covid madness is over.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People don't owe each other anything on here or anywhere else. If they block you that sucks and I feel for you, but that it is done.
Don't worry about it anymore.
Move on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honestly dude -
Patience, perseverance and respect.
This may sound a little odd but try and imagine you're writing a mail to a female relative. It's been said you are polite in your messages so you've that down.
But I'd also jazz up your profile a wee bit. Using standard male bravado bullshit like "lots of stamina" or the likes is just... and I don't mean to be insulting... but it's infantile.
Treat this site as a dating site for all intents and purposes, it's just a dating site where the shared goal is sex rather than dates.
You absolutely need to work on your picture as well. Cock shots are everywhere and give you no USP (unique selling point), if you want to stand out, stand out. Don't offer a generic cock pic when there are literally HUNDREDS of more appealing penises out there. And I apply that same logic to myself. There will ALWAYS be someone fitter, younger, better looking, more sexually appealing and better hung than me, that's just a fact.
How do I compete?
I don't.
I offer what no one else here can offer; me.
It can seem difficult for single lads on here but it's like anything, once you learn how to do it you'll never forget.
Best of luck in your efforts Friend. |
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"Op
Do you read profiles before sending out messages
Do you make sure that your attributes match what she's actually put in her profile
In short were you offering her exactly what she was looking for
That what she means by disrespecting her...did she say no messages from blank profiles "
A lot of people do not read profiles if they did it would be so much better on here I do not lock many people just persistent ones who keep sending messages with cock pics and friend invites Most woman on here dont care if you just came across stumbled across cum across our profile by "accident" and "just had to chance my arm messaging you"
Just read our profiles |
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I tend to block for many reasons....one mainly is they are not my type,too short in height or not what am attracted too..or even live too far away!
Not even a profile pic even if not their face thats fine...or the way their opening message doesn't sit right with me...maybe rude..manners cost nothing use them wisely...
Repeated offenders its just easier to block them!
Don't want to waste anyone's time especially my own...
Blunt I know that's just me open and honest... |
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"Op
Do you read profiles before sending out messages
Do you make sure that your attributes match what she's actually put in her profile
In short were you offering her exactly what she was looking for
That what she means by disrespecting her...did she say no messages from blank profiles
A lot of people do not read profiles if they did it would be so much better on here I do not lock many people just persistent ones who keep sending messages with cock pics and friend invites Most woman on here dont care if you just came across stumbled across cum across our profile by "accident" and "just had to chance my arm messaging you"
Just read our profiles "
I hear ya most ppl get so offended if you block them simply because they don't read profiles it helps both folk! It's there for a reason...forever telling ppl to read it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I feel sorry for some men on here. It can be hard to get and keep a woman’s attention.
I agree with the advice above; read profile, be respectful, don’t show your cock straight off and behave like a normal decent human being.
I have blocked men in the past for being way too aggressive asking for intimate photos, asking favourite positions or what you will do sexually.
Some men here seem to assume that women are up for anything because they’re here and forget they’re speaking to a human being.
This is a complete turn off for me and I’m sure any woman. Know the difference between flirting and being a creep
Get a few nice photos of yourself and add them to your profile. Have a sense of humour and just be a decent man.
Just accept you can’t please everyone and try not to take things too personally. |
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"I feel sorry for some men on here. It can be hard to get and keep a woman’s attention.
I agree with the advice above; read profile, be respectful, don’t show your cock straight off and behave like a normal decent human being.
I have blocked men in the past for being way too aggressive asking for intimate photos, asking favourite positions or what you will do sexually.
Some men here seem to assume that women are up for anything because they’re here and forget they’re speaking to a human being.
This is a complete turn off for me and I’m sure any woman. Know the difference between flirting and being a creep
Get a few nice photos of yourself and add them to your profile. Have a sense of humour and just be a decent man.
Just accept you can’t please everyone and try not to take things too personally."
Great way to out it hun men just think they are entitled to a leg over even if you just say hi! Men forget how to respect a women and talk to her decently! I instantly block men because 'suck my dick' is in noway gonna make me say ohhh yeah he sounds lovely I must message him back!and then they have a cheek to to even ask why you don't answer them! Or want to chat! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I feel sorry for some men on here. It can be hard to get and keep a woman’s attention.
I agree with the advice above; read profile, be respectful, don’t show your cock straight off and behave like a normal decent human being.
I have blocked men in the past for being way too aggressive asking for intimate photos, asking favourite positions or what you will do sexually.
Some men here seem to assume that women are up for anything because they’re here and forget they’re speaking to a human being.
This is a complete turn off for me and I’m sure any woman. Know the difference between flirting and being a creep
Get a few nice photos of yourself and add them to your profile. Have a sense of humour and just be a decent man.
Just accept you can’t please everyone and try not to take things too personally.
Great way to out it hun men just think they are entitled to a leg over even if you just say hi! Men forget how to respect a women and talk to her decently! I instantly block men because 'suck my dick' is in noway gonna make me say ohhh yeah he sounds lovely I must message him back!and then they have a cheek to to even ask why you don't answer them! Or want to chat! "
Yeah most men are lovely and respectful and I always try to reply. But I feel from experience it’s pointless if you don’t think there’ll be a connection.
We could spend our lives messaging and it’s very hard to know if it’s worth messaging one person vs another. Can be very overwhelming.
But I had a really bad experience lately with a guy. We chatted very good looking and attractive.
However he felt entitled to speak to me in a very sexual way straight off and couldn’t take it when I called him out on it stating that he had enough “negativity” in his life and fab girls should be “fun” and “lighthearted”.
Apparently I was also the first to call him out in such lines as “you have beautiful eyes is love to be looking into them as I cum in your mouth”
Am i really the only woman to be offended by these kind of remarks from a complete and total stranger  |
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you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that. |
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We all know about the disrespectful men and their expectations but apparently not all women want the same things.
I've had messages from women who have "had a few older guys in the past" and want"another one".
Then there are the ones who introduce themselves with "Nice pics, you'd be a lot of fun between my legs".
And yes I've even had the "You're fairly local and I'm horny right now" messages.
I'm sure it's worked for them before but respect works both ways.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all know about the disrespectful men and their expectations but apparently not all women want the same things.
I've had messages from women who have "had a few older guys in the past" and want"another one".
Then there are the ones who introduce themselves with "Nice pics, you'd be a lot of fun between my legs".
And yes I've even had the "You're fairly local and I'm horny right now" messages.
I'm sure it's worked for them before but respect works both ways.
"
Oh yeah absolutely each to their own. Nothing wrong with it if that’s what you like.
I suppose it comes down to social intelligence and following another persons cue.
I have had amazing meets on here and have chatted to lovely guys but I’m just not into sex talk with someone I haven’t met or have any rapport with.
In fairness I did at first politely tell him I didn’t enjoy that but he continued and then I was apparently “no fun” and “hard work”
I just think guys like that have no place on here or anywhere else for that matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that. "
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men |
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men "
I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?"
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though. |
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You are only here 7 weeks ...
Calling women birds thats a no no ...
Slots whores the c word also dont work ...
Be respectful... have patience...
Its not a dial a fuck site...
We do have brains and feelings not only boobs asses and a vagina ..
Good luck  |
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though."
I'm glad you agreed some men could do everything right and still struggle. is the sole of blame purely always on men for not getting replies? absolutely not and any person would be very naive to think otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though.I'm glad you agreed some men could do everything right and still struggle. is the sole of blame purely always on men for not getting replies? absolutely not and any person would be very naive to think otherwise. "
No I’m definitely not saying that. But just giving some insight into my experience which I thought might be helpful. |
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though.I'm glad you agreed some men could do everything right and still struggle. is the sole of blame purely always on men for not getting replies? absolutely not and any person would be very naive to think otherwise.
No I’m definitely not saying that. But just giving some insight into my experience which I thought might be helpful."
that's grand but I find on here with these sort of things men get the blame 99% of the time. if a man was doing everything right in normal times and getting nowhere after a few months, I wouldnt blame anybody getting frustrated |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are a few factors and blaming one side is unfair. I agree with it.
Let take my example: not interest in meeting men. I have filters up but still getting lots of requests to friend or meet me.
I participate on the forums and in the chatrooms and of course have lots of chats with men population here but they are just chats about interesting books, movies, travels, etc
Its nice to know that more people have similar passion and its great to have a group of forumites to laugh with.
Its not only a sex site in my opinion but people (especially men) must consider that patience is definitely most important factor on fab.
Its not only being nice, and having manners. Women's mood change all the time (its truth!) and you have to know that all may go well first week but then change and you are wondering why? It could be anything.
Women vs men ratio is like 25:1 maybe more. Lots of us have filters up to avoid full mailbox. I try my best to answer all mails but sometimes it is not even worthwhile to read them! Its truth.
Easier to block nasty people than explain them why we wont chat to them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though.I'm glad you agreed some men could do everything right and still struggle. is the sole of blame purely always on men for not getting replies? absolutely not and any person would be very naive to think otherwise.
No I’m definitely not saying that. But just giving some insight into my experience which I thought might be helpful.that's grand but I find on here with these sort of things men get the blame 99% of the time. if a man was doing everything right in normal times and getting nowhere after a few months, I wouldnt blame anybody getting frustrated "
Yeah I see that but by the same token men also blame women when things don’t go as planned.
Even when their own attitude is the cause. See my story above? Just one example of many |
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"you could do everything right on here, nice pics, nice profile, nice mails and still get nowhere. it's the nature of the site. if you're a man on here and actively trying with a nice profile and you're getting nowhere after a decent period, theyre is something drastically wrong. obviously in current times you cant view it like that.
Again I think it’s the ratio of men to women and the amount of messages women get that causes this problem rather than anything to do with the person.
Must be very disheartening. Equally disheartening is taking the time to speak to someone and being treated like trash.
I think this makes women a lot less receptive to even the nicer men I have seem numerous women on these forums say u can easily decrease your volume of mail with filters. do you not find that?
Yeah i definitely do that you still get an awful lot especially if you’re new or had a break. It does settle down over time though.I'm glad you agreed some men could do everything right and still struggle. is the sole of blame purely always on men for not getting replies? absolutely not and any person would be very naive to think otherwise.
No I’m definitely not saying that. But just giving some insight into my experience which I thought might be helpful.that's grand but I find on here with these sort of things men get the blame 99% of the time. if a man was doing everything right in normal times and getting nowhere after a few months, I wouldnt blame anybody getting frustrated
Yeah I see that but by the same token men also blame women when things don’t go as planned.
Even when their own attitude is the cause. See my story above? Just one example of many"
ye both can be in the wrong in diff ways. |
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