FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > MMF v FFM expectations.
MMF v FFM expectations.
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So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations? |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
when you contact another couple do you know who's actually shocked when you say no interest...The male or female.
I'd imagine 100% of men like watching 2 ff if in that situation but no where near that percentage of women are into it as seen by a thread discussing this last week |
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"when you contact another couple do you know who's actually shocked when you say no interest...The male or female.
I'd imagine 100% of men like watching 2 ff if in that situation but no where near that percentage of women are into it as seen by a thread discussing this last week "
I NEVER contact other couples. When they contact me I reply that I’m not bisexual so thanks but no Thanks. I generally get Replies of disgust that I won’t perform oral sex on the woman (both genders seem to be equally horrified) or judgemental bullshit that I won’t confirm my marital status to them. I’ve only ever twice had a half decent chat with couples. I get about 3-4 requests a day. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight. |
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"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight."
I think spagetti straight phrases that well. |
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"when you contact another couple do you know who's actually shocked when you say no interest...The male or female.
I'd imagine 100% of men like watching 2 ff if in that situation but no where near that percentage of women are into it as seen by a thread discussing this last week
I NEVER contact other couples. When they contact me I reply that I’m not bisexual so thanks but no Thanks. I generally get Replies of disgust that I won’t perform oral sex on the woman (both genders seem to be equally horrified) or judgemental bullshit that I won’t confirm my marital status to them. I’ve only ever twice had a half decent chat with couples. I get about 3-4 requests a day. "
Its crazy the amount of people who don't read profiles or think they'll chance it anyway. |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
I think spagetti straight phrases that well. "
But that implies she's bi
The Op knows the difference between all the different permutations and is only concerned as to why its assumed she will have oral sex with another woman during a fmf
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"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
I think spagetti straight phrases that well.
But that implies she's bi
The Op knows the difference between all the different permutations and is only concerned as to why its assumed she will have oral sex with another woman during a fmf
"
To me spagetti straight means your straight but dont mind "crossing swords" with other women. Very different from being bisexual.
Yeah i got the ops question. I didnt answer it coz Ive no idea why anyone would think a straight woman would want to give oral to another woman.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations? "
Blame the porn industry.
“Straight” porn which is mainly aimed at men would have full on lesbian action in an FFM scene.
Whereas, in an MMF scene there would be absolutely no interaction between the guys. All spitroast and manly shit.
We’ve been conditioned since we started looking at porn to believe that all women are bi. Or at least the ones who have sex  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations?
Blame the porn industry.
“Straight” porn which is mainly aimed at men would have full on lesbian action in an FFM scene.
Whereas, in an MMF scene there would be absolutely no interaction between the guys. All spitroast and manly shit.
We’ve been conditioned since we started looking at porn to believe that all women are bi. Or at least the ones who have sex "
Yes, and it's pretty tedious when couples start telling me that I don't know what I'm missing by refusing to play with another woman. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight."
"Don't mind locking lips"?  |
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Something I noticed creeping into couple profile. A small number will show the male as straight but when you get chatting they ask if you'd suck the male. This is unusual BUT is getting more common. I chatted with one couple and when it looked like we would meet the question was asked. When I suggested that they should change the male profile to, at least, bicurious the were highly offended. Why can't people be honest in their profile. |
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Thanks for the replies! Thanks Bog M!! I know all the nuances of MMF, MFM FFM FMF MMFF. Either way FFM or FMF is presumed to have the two women essentially fucking also. Drives me mad.
As for the men saying they can’t manage two women, if any women want some reccys of men that have done just fine, get in touch
It is a pity because there is plenty of STRAIGHT women who enjoy sex around other women.. lots of fun can be had Maybe it’s lack of imagination? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Either way FFM or FMF is presumed to have the two women essentially fucking also "
That’s because people are using the terms wrongly I’d say you’ll find. They’re being lazy in what they mean. These people really should use MFF if it’s going to be a full three way and only should use FMF if it’s to be the guy only getting to play with both women |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
"Don't mind locking lips"? "
 copyright that Pete |
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"Something I noticed creeping into couple profile. A small number will show the male as straight but when you get chatting they ask if you'd suck the male. This is unusual BUT is getting more common. I chatted with one couple and when it looked like we would meet the question was asked. When I suggested that they should change the male profile to, at least, bicurious the were highly offended. Why can't people be honest in their profile."
Unfortunately a lot of bi curious and bi sexual men on Fab won't out themselves as such because of the stigma and prejudice that is still associated with it - apparently these men are more likely to be riddled with STDs as they play with other men and TV/TS - disgusting really, isn't it (sorry, my voice is dripping with sarcasm here ...) and sure those are all riddled with STDs too because they can't get a woman to roide them so they have to turn elsewhere  ...if it weren't for the judgement and prejudice out there against these men (who may then have an even slimmer chance of a meet with a woman or couple) even on sites like this!!!, I'm sure a lot more men would be happy to "out" themselves as at least curious or bi sexual!
We have bi curiosity listed on our profile because we are exactly that! Curious...and open and willing to explore, but that doesn't mean it's a requirement for play, nothing wrong with it, we still would always play safe and use "educated" judgement on who we engage with...and always include the wishes and expectations of who we are engaging with...
Kinky |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
"Don't mind locking lips"? "
Could be read as scissors sisters by some tho |
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"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
"Don't mind locking lips"?
Could be read as scissors sisters by some tho "
Hahahahha!!! Yeah, not going back to your gaf... |
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"So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations? "
I'm sorry to hear that anyone or some couples are shocked at your reaction of not wanting to engage orally with another woman. I think it's always about clear communication if a rapport can be established between different profiles, whoever they are...if boundaries can't be respected from the get go and are even received with shock, they're not people worth engaging with. Sex is about communication, trust and respect, to start with...if those can't be established, it'll never come to anything...
Kinky |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"You see a lot of men have a phrase on their profiles " dont mind crossing swords " to ensure couples know they mean they are straight.
What is the female equivalent phrase to ensue that couples know she's straight.
"Don't mind locking lips"?
Could be read as scissors sisters by some tho
Hahahahha!!! Yeah, not going back to your gaf... "
Haha don't worry you'd be safe anyhow Just made me laugh when I read that and the perv in me thought that |
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"
I'm sorry to hear that anyone or some couples are shocked at your reaction of not wanting to engage orally with another woman. I think it's always about clear communication if a rapport can be established between different profiles, whoever they are...if boundaries can't be respected from the get go and are even received with shock, they're not people worth engaging with. Sex is about communication, trust and respect, to start with...if those can't be established, it'll never come to anything...
Kinky"
Yeah that in itself is a red flag. As are the men who stop talking to you when you say you always practice safe sex. RED FLAG.
For the most part tho, couples profiles mostly have a lot more photos of the woman on them but the woman is listed as straight. So she’s ok to receive but not give.
Reminds me of when a girl contacted me once to ask me to join her and her FB for a 3 some. We chatted for a bit and then I asked if she would join me and my FWB for a 3some if it worked well. Her response was along the lines of “god no, I’d never fuck a man I hadn’t chosen myself, do you think I’m some sort of a slut?” LOL. Right back atcha bitch |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I'm sorry to hear that anyone or some couples are shocked at your reaction of not wanting to engage orally with another woman. I think it's always about clear communication if a rapport can be established between different profiles, whoever they are...if boundaries can't be respected from the get go and are even received with shock, they're not people worth engaging with. Sex is about communication, trust and respect, to start with...if those can't be established, it'll never come to anything...
Kinky
Yeah that in itself is a red flag. As are the men who stop talking to you when you say you always practice safe sex. RED FLAG.
For the most part tho, couples profiles mostly have a lot more photos of the woman on them but the woman is listed as straight. So she’s ok to receive but not give.
Reminds me of when a girl contacted me once to ask me to join her and her FB for a 3 some. We chatted for a bit and then I asked if she would join me and my FWB for a 3some if it worked well. Her response was along the lines of “god no, I’d never fuck a man I hadn’t chosen myself, do you think I’m some sort of a slut?” LOL. Right back atcha bitch "
Ehh! That’s mental lol
She would be choosing the guy tho. If she agreed to a threesome then that’s choosing both people lol. Strange woman |
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I'm sorry to hear that anyone or some couples are shocked at your reaction of not wanting to engage orally with another woman. I think it's always about clear communication if a rapport can be established between different profiles, whoever they are...if boundaries can't be respected from the get go and are even received with shock, they're not people worth engaging with. Sex is about communication, trust and respect, to start with...if those can't be established, it'll never come to anything...
Kinky
Yeah that in itself is a red flag. As are the men who stop talking to you when you say you always practice safe sex. RED FLAG.
For the most part tho, couples profiles mostly have a lot more photos of the woman on them but the woman is listed as straight. So she’s ok to receive but not give.
Reminds me of when a girl contacted me once to ask me to join her and her FB for a 3 some. We chatted for a bit and then I asked if she would join me and my FWB for a 3some if it worked well. Her response was along the lines of “god no, I’d never fuck a man I hadn’t chosen myself, do you think I’m some sort of a slut?” LOL. Right back atcha bitch
Ehh! That’s mental lol
She would be choosing the guy tho. If she agreed to a threesome then that’s choosing both people lol. Strange woman "
She was referring to my request for a 3some with my FB. She was saying she wouldn’t fuck in a 3some with a man she hadn’t picked herself. But it was expected I would fuck her man when I hadnt picked him??? It was a pity cos her FB was pretty hot. She’s an asshole either way and long blocked. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I'm sorry to hear that anyone or some couples are shocked at your reaction of not wanting to engage orally with another woman. I think it's always about clear communication if a rapport can be established between different profiles, whoever they are...if boundaries can't be respected from the get go and are even received with shock, they're not people worth engaging with. Sex is about communication, trust and respect, to start with...if those can't be established, it'll never come to anything...
Kinky
Yeah that in itself is a red flag. As are the men who stop talking to you when you say you always practice safe sex. RED FLAG.
For the most part tho, couples profiles mostly have a lot more photos of the woman on them but the woman is listed as straight. So she’s ok to receive but not give.
Reminds me of when a girl contacted me once to ask me to join her and her FB for a 3 some. We chatted for a bit and then I asked if she would join me and my FWB for a 3some if it worked well. Her response was along the lines of “god no, I’d never fuck a man I hadn’t chosen myself, do you think I’m some sort of a slut?” LOL. Right back atcha bitch
Ehh! That’s mental lol
She would be choosing the guy tho. If she agreed to a threesome then that’s choosing both people lol. Strange woman
She was referring to my request for a 3some with my FB. She was saying she wouldn’t fuck in a 3some with a man she hadn’t picked herself. But it was expected I would fuck her man when I hadnt picked him??? It was a pity cos her FB was pretty hot. She’s an asshole either way and long blocked. "
Oh I know she was referring to your guy. She still has the option to choose or not choose that particular guy when presented with couples offering her a threesome. That’s what I meant. There’s still a choice there based on if she would like the guy or not. So I meant that she is strange in that she doesn’t recognise that choice.
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"
Oh I know she was referring to your guy. She still has the option to choose or not choose that particular guy when presented with couples offering her a threesome. That’s what I meant. There’s still a choice there based on if she would like the guy or not. So I meant that she is strange in that she doesn’t recognise that choice.
"
Ah ok yeah it was odd alright. If she’d found him repulsive I’d have understood but the “slut” comment was, eeep, divisive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Oh I know she was referring to your guy. She still has the option to choose or not choose that particular guy when presented with couples offering her a threesome. That’s what I meant. There’s still a choice there based on if she would like the guy or not. So I meant that she is strange in that she doesn’t recognise that choice.
Ah ok yeah it was odd alright. If she’d found him repulsive I’d have understood but the “slut” comment was, eeep, divisive. "
Yea, in an era where the heat is on men to tidy up threat act towards women, women doing it to other women is fucked up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm kinda the same... Don't mind soft play with other girls, kissing touching etc but I've never actually given oral to a girl (scares me if I'm honest!). Maybe this is why I prefer parties and one on one's instead of two couple swaps. Wouldnt rule it out tho with the right woman  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What if it were the case that humans think far too much of themselves, both on and outside of fab? What if all our notions of 'identity' meant nothing, be it personal identity, national identity, the way we perceive our sexual orientation etc. What about if we stop clinging as if they were life rafts to our names, genders, nationalities, class, tribes of every kind, and just let ourselves be part of the greater whole, which for convenience, we call nature, and let every time, place and personal encounter be a singular experience?
So perhaps no rules, no names, no orientation or tribe. And perhaps we might cling less bigotedly to a fixed identity and ask ourselves from time to time, who's living me now?
Errm, I'm now banning myself from the forum . |
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"So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations? "
While I'm straight, I do like going with the flow, it's fun but I'm limited like you are, in how far I will go. So I suppose I'm 'bi-curious', but that word is so ambiguous that I won't state it on our profile. So instead I opted for "straight" and put in a line to explain it a bit. I do find it annoying the way some couples expect the ladies to play with each other though, like we're all being placed in the same narrow category - Mrs  |
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"So here’s a question.
I enjoy MMF but I never expect the men to play together. If I want that, it’s a biMMF.
So why is it always presumed that in an FFM, the two women will play together. I’m not bi. I’m straight. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed FFM with a delicious female where it’s not expected of me to do oral (give or receive) with the other female. And it was superb fun. However any time I’ve been messaged by another couple, it’s been received with SHOCK that I’m not interested in being sexual with the female. FWIW, I love kissing women and boobs and bums and all that I’m not a prude.
Why the completely different expectations?
While I'm straight, I do like going with the flow, it's fun but I'm limited like you are, in how far I will go. So I suppose I'm 'bi-curious', but that word is so ambiguous that I won't state it on our profile. So instead I opted for "straight" and put in a line to explain it a bit. I do find it annoying the way some couples expect the ladies to play with each other though, like we're all being placed in the same narrow category - Mrs "
This  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think we shouldn’t just presume everyone knows the rules of TLAs, a short conversation can easily clear it all up. I wouldn’t expect less if I was to meet someone anyway ?? |
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By *1CorkCouple
over a year ago
London |
"While I'm straight, I do like going with the flow, it's fun but I'm limited like you are, in how far I will go. So I suppose I'm 'bi-curious', but that word is so ambiguous that I won't state it on our profile. So instead I opted for "straight" and put in a line to explain it a bit. I do find it annoying the way some couples expect the ladies to play with each other though, like we're all being placed in the same narrow category - Mrs "
Very similar to that and like to describe it as bi-playful rather than bi-curious. Probably no perfect way of describing it. |
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FFS! Not a Fab acronym of coupling.
It means For Fuck Sake!
I'm in a room with 2 naked ladies and myself.
Do I care if they play with each other?
If they do, I will certainly enjoy the experience.
Guess what?
If they don't, they're concentrating on me and our fun together.
Anyone not happy with that is a fool  |
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"FFS! Not a Fab acronym of coupling.
It means For Fuck Sake!
I'm in a room with 2 naked ladies and myself.
Do I care if they play with each other?
If they do, I will certainly enjoy the experience.
Guess what?
If they don't, they're concentrating on me and our fun together.
Anyone not happy with that is a fool "
As to the other MMF scenario, not never happening but not likely.
However MFM is much more possible.
The placing of letters these days is so important  |
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