Although I’ve been a member of FS for just over a year now its only now I’ve really discovered the forums and I see they can be very helpful stupid I know its taken me this long but here I am.
As you can see I’ve said right from the off on my profile I’m a wheelchair user. I did this right from the beginning because I fully believe in honesty even though I knew right from the outset it would hamper my chances of meets but I thought then and still do now it’s the right thing to do because this is something I’d rather not have to explain further down the line, I want it to be known right from the beginning.
But without sounding paranoid I’m pretty sure this is a huge obstacle, I just can’t seem to get off the mark.
So has anyone out there got any advice they might perhaps give me? I’m pretty shy and probably wouldn’t really like to go into much detail on the open board about my sex life so please feel free to PM me but if push comes to shove, I don’t mind talking on the open board somewhat.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, hoping for some good advice.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fair play to yo CB for your honesty and this thread. Your profile could do with a bit more info about your personality and the women you would like to meet. A few public pics would be a must too, as no public pics dismiss interest quickly. I doubt your situation would be an obstacle to as many as you believe.
Good luck  |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"Fair play to yo CB for your honesty and this thread. Your profile could do with a bit more info about your personality and the women you would like to meet. A few public pics would be a must too, as no public pics dismiss interest quickly. I doubt your situation would be an obstacle to as many as you believe.
Good luck "
I agree with this. First thing I do is look at a profile before I answer any new message in fact before I even open a message I look. If the profile doesn't interest me or is blank I usually just move on.
Chat more on here as well if you want people to get to know you or in the chat room. The more you are seen the more people will get a feel of who you are .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t reply to messages from profiles with
no photos Or fill in later profiles . The way I look at it is , they messaged us after checking out our profile and photos and decided they liked what saw/read but don’t give Us the same choices  |
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By *ateniteCouple
over a year ago
Youghal |
"I don’t reply to messages from profiles with
no photos Or fill in later profiles . The way I look at it is , they messaged us after checking out our profile and photos and decided they liked what saw/read but don’t give Us the same choices "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Public pics and more about yourself OP. Then you will be like the rest of us who cant get a meet . Lol. You have to remember we men outnumber the ladies by seveal hundred to one. Just dont lose heart and maybe your luck will change. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"I don’t reply to messages from profiles with
no photos Or fill in later profiles . The way I look at it is , they messaged us after checking out our profile and photos and decided they liked what saw/read but don’t give Us the same choices "
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Hey guys I just want to start off by saying thank you to everyone for their brilliant advice so far. I’m not going to thank everyone individually because that’s not right so again like I said thank you so very much for everyone that’s contributed.
So as far as I can see the general consensus is I need to add photos and that does make a lot of sense, however that is going to be a bit of a problem for me because I use a pretty unique wheelchair, there really isn’t a lot of them around and it is pretty rare to see one and so if I started posting pics with me in it and if anyone I know came across them they would have a fair idea it was me. Because of my job I would honestly be ruined, not only that I wouldn’t want my friends or family knowing I was on here, I really don’t know how I’m going to get around this because really it does make sense I do need to have some sort of photos on my profile but because of my career friends and family I need to be very careful privacy wise.
Something I can and will be able to do straight away and without any difficulty is to get more involved in the forums and chatrooms. All you guys seem to be a really nice helpful friendly lot and hopefully this way you too will get an idea of what I’m like.
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Can you take a few of yourself on your bed for example? Another bit if advice is to set a pic as a profile pic. That pic will show on the 'who looked at me', 'who fabbed', hotlist, local updates lists etc. That silhouette is sure to get your profile ignored in these types of lists. Good luck |
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"Can you take a few of yourself on your bed for example? Another bit if advice is to set a pic as a profile pic. That pic will show on the 'who looked at me', 'who fabbed', hotlist, local updates lists etc. That silhouette is sure to get your profile ignored in these types of lists. Good luck "
Forgot about forum threads, it shows there as well as you can see and stands out if it's a good one |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"Hey guys I just want to start off by saying thank you to everyone for their brilliant advice so far. I’m not going to thank everyone individually because that’s not right so again like I said thank you so very much for everyone that’s contributed.
So as far as I can see the general consensus is I need to add photos and that does make a lot of sense, however that is going to be a bit of a problem for me because I use a pretty unique wheelchair, there really isn’t a lot of them around and it is pretty rare to see one and so if I started posting pics with me in it and if anyone I know came across them they would have a fair idea it was me. Because of my job I would honestly be ruined, not only that I wouldn’t want my friends or family knowing I was on here, I really don’t know how I’m going to get around this because really it does make sense I do need to have some sort of photos on my profile but because of my career friends and family I need to be very careful privacy wise.
Something I can and will be able to do straight away and without any difficulty is to get more involved in the forums and chatrooms. All you guys seem to be a really nice helpful friendly lot and hopefully this way you too will get an idea of what I’m like.
"
I hope you enjoy the forums and chat rooms.They can be good craic. You'll find a way with pics it's hard especially when you first join but you will be surprised how many you can take that won't allow you to be easily recognised. It's trial and error really x |
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"Although I’ve been a member of FS for just over a year now its only now I’ve really discovered the forums and I see they can be very helpful stupid I know its taken me this long but here I am.
As you can see I’ve said right from the off on my profile I’m a wheelchair user. I did this right from the beginning because I fully believe in honesty even though I knew right from the outset it would hamper my chances of meets but I thought then and still do now it’s the right thing to do because this is something I’d rather not have to explain further down the line, I want it to be known right from the beginning.
But without sounding paranoid I’m pretty sure this is a huge obstacle, I just can’t seem to get off the mark.
So has anyone out there got any advice they might perhaps give me? I’m pretty shy and probably wouldn’t really like to go into much detail on the open board about my sex life so please feel free to PM me but if push comes to shove, I don’t mind talking on the open board somewhat.
Thanks for taking the time to read this, hoping for some good advice.
"
The ladies here do like honesty you only get so far by lying be yourself have a positive attitude maybe update your pics spruce up your profile a bit invite them in to know more about you just because your in a wheelchair doesn't mean can't have fun and if people judge you on just that then it's their loss not yours there are plenty of ladies here that are not like that of course I'm no expert here lol best of luck op |
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By *B 4099Man
over a year ago
North West, Outer Letterkenny area |
"Hey guys I just want to start off by saying thank you to everyone for their brilliant advice so far. I’m not going to thank everyone individually because that’s not right so again like I said thank you so very much for everyone that’s contributed.
So as far as I can see the general consensus is I need to add photos and that does make a lot of sense, however that is going to be a bit of a problem for me because I use a pretty unique wheelchair, there really isn’t a lot of them around and it is pretty rare to see one and so if I started posting pics with me in it and if anyone I know came across them they would have a fair idea it was me. Because of my job I would honestly be ruined, not only that I wouldn’t want my friends or family knowing I was on here, I really don’t know how I’m going to get around this because really it does make sense I do need to have some sort of photos on my profile but because of my career friends and family I need to be very careful privacy wise.
Something I can and will be able to do straight away and without any difficulty is to get more involved in the forums and chatrooms. All you guys seem to be a really nice helpful friendly lot and hopefully this way you too will get an idea of what I’m like.
"
best of luck OP you will do fine, some great tips. And enjoy the forums too |
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Okay so they way I’m leaving this is like this, as I don’t exactly look like the next Tom Hardy or Chris Hemsworth I didn’t think it necessary for me to be lying on a bed semi-naked showing off my non existent six pack so I opted for taking a pretty normal clothed shot of me in my wheels after carful cropping of it. Anything more like face or body I’ve no problem at all sending privately via PM. That’s the best I think I can do. If this doesn’t work then that’s it at least I can say I’ve tried. |
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"Okay so they way I’m leaving this is like this, as I don’t exactly look like the next Tom Hardy or Chris Hemsworth I didn’t think it necessary for me to be lying on a bed semi-naked showing off my non existent six pack so I opted for taking a pretty normal clothed shot of me in my wheels after carful cropping of it. Anything more like face or body I’ve no problem at all sending privately via PM. That’s the best I think I can do. If this doesn’t work then that’s it at least I can say I’ve tried. "
No its not necessary if they actually read your profile then they will completely understand like it's completely up to you what you put up I have my face pic up basically what you see is what you get I'm not into hiding myself and believe me I'm far from having chiseled features like we can't be everyone's cup of tea if they have a problem with you or just simply not interested just move on plenty of lovely ladies here good things happen to those who wait |
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