FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Here is a question for the Gents
Here is a question for the Gents
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Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve asked a lot of men that question n can’t get a definitive answer,some women and couples won’t play with bi guys so that’s one reason,they think it lessens their chance of a meet if they have it on profile
other lads are still afraid of being ‘outed’ and don’t have the confidence to say it on there profiles,I think that’s a pity really
We are always on the look out for bi men to play with but they are not too easy to find
I personally think it’s hot as fuck having a sexy MMF with 2 bi men 
XxRedxx |
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"I agree with red riding.. Think most are afraid it lessens their chances with cpls and rest are afraid of bein ousted..
"
Surely nowadays it's not a shame to be bi...
I know several bi males part of couples who dont have problems with meeting other couples were the male is straight. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There is a HUGE amount of prejudice on this site and others around men who have sex with men.
The usual explanations I come across are:
1. Men who have sex with men aren't "real" men or are somehow compromised in their masculinity... Which, to me, is absolutely fucking ridiculous.
2. Men who have sex with men are more at risk of catching and spreading STIs. Given the fact that most swingers need to be extremely careful and cautious with whomever they decided to play with, as long as everyone utilises protection and common sense hygienic practice, I can't see how this reason is valid either.
3. Some people say it's "just not for them" or "I can't explain why I don't like it", or "I just don't want to meet those people" - in my humble opinion these people could benefit from examining why exactly male on male sexual activity makes them so uncomfortable.
(For the record, I don't identify as straight in particular, nor as bi-sexual, or as gay. I don't find men or cocks attractive in any way, shape or form. Guy on guy sex doesn't repulse me, if I was at a party and two blokes went at it, more power to em. I'm also comfortable with cuckold clean up, placement and "crossed swords"...
That said, I'm exclusively interested in women for sexual reasons and for romantic/relationship reasons.) |
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"There is a HUGE amount of prejudice on this site and others around men who have sex with men.
The usual explanations I come across are:
1. Men who have sex with men aren't "real" men or are somehow compromised in their masculinity... Which, to me, is absolutely fucking ridiculous.
2. Men who have sex with men are more at risk of catching and spreading STIs. Given the fact that most swingers need to be extremely careful and cautious with whomever they decided to play with, as long as everyone utilises protection and common sense hygienic practice, I can't see how this reason is valid either.
3. Some people say it's "just not for them" or "I can't explain why I don't like it", or "I just don't want to meet those people" - in my humble opinion these people could benefit from examining why exactly male on male sexual activity makes them so uncomfortable.
(For the record, I don't identify as straight in particular, nor as bi-sexual, or as gay. I don't find men or cocks attractive in any way, shape or form. Guy on guy sex doesn't repulse me, if I was at a party and two blokes went at it, more power to em. I'm also comfortable with cuckold clean up, placement and "crossed swords"...
That said, I'm exclusively interested in women for sexual reasons and for romantic/relationship reasons.) "
100% |
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By *jallMan
over a year ago
Cork/Sligo |
You might not be "bi" persay, but have fantasies, and be confident enough to go for them, instead of just thinking about them, brave and honest.
I've had softplay with a couple of select men and they know how to get the most out of a cock, cool, I won't have any regrets. So I describe myself as bicurious, as my first love is women, every time |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
Many reasons guys do this; inc
1. Many women open post they dont want to meet men who do this.
2. Many men are spoofers, will chat about it, jerk off and never meet.
3. Many guys won't admit they are bi.
4. Many guys would have a sexual encounter with a guy without attraction. They are simply attracted to the act rather than the person.
5. When women won't reply some guys are happy to get a blow job or anal shag off another guy as long as they are top and nobody finds out (in case they are oited as having an orientation they don't have)
There's prob lots more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
I find it strange that straight guys get blowjobs from men in gloryholes but are still straight!  |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
I find it strange that straight guys get blowjobs from men in gloryholes but are still straight! "
That is what confuses me  |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
I find it strange that straight guys get blowjobs from men in gloryholes but are still straight!
That is what confuses me "
I guess when you're getti g a blow job and enjoying the pleasure of it then it doesnt matter who is giving it. Being the person giving the blowjob would be a whole other consideration |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
I think you're still straight if you don't push back. |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
That's simple. Many ladies don't want to play with bi guys. What's interesting though is why would one lie about their sexuality to have sexual intimacy with people that loathe them in the first place? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fooling around and having fun in a bi mmf doesn't have to la el you as bi.
There should be a bi play status for those of us confident enough to admit we can enjoy male on male contact with a general attraction to men. |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
That's simple. Many ladies don't want to play with bi guys. What's interesting though is why would one lie about their sexuality to have sexual intimacy with people that loathe them in the first place?"
As a straight guy I get turned on by women only , Do bi guys get turned on by both sexes ? |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"You would be surprised by the amount of straight guys who message bi guys. "
being inquisitive is good, you can learn from each other and lots of bi women try to chat straight guys up for their bi guys
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By *samaleMan
over a year ago
tralee/newcastlewest |
I'm 100% straight, not interested in men sexually whatsoever and I agree with you, I can't understand why they do it, I blocked men from messaging me because it was all "straight" guys messaging offering sexual favours.!! I just couldn't understand it BUT lets not forget the ladies here.!!! Plenty of ladies have their profiles as straight but only want to meet women or have threesomes with bi women.!!! |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
"You would be surprised by the amount of straight guys who message bi guys. being inquisitive is good, you can learn from each other and lots of bi women try to chat straight guys up for their bi guys "
Sorry ? Can you explain this point or is it a typo |
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"mmf = guys will play with each other and the female
mfm = straight play
Anyone else see this previously???"
I use it like that now too.
I'm not sexually into guys, but an MFM or being watched are some of my favourites.
The sexual energies really amplify each other like fun energies at a concert! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
They aren't straight that's why. Not sure if they aren't able to admit it or if they are both bi and homophobic...example...I've had messages like 'I'm not gay I just want to suck another straight guy off...totally straight" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
Yeah.. a few sending me messages constantly... And the profile says "straight"... Fcking desperate...lol |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
Yeah.. a few sending me messages constantly... And the profile says "straight"... Fcking desperate...lol"
I wouldnt say desperate. Confused maybe ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
Yeah.. a few sending me messages constantly... And the profile says "straight"... Fcking desperate...lol
I wouldnt say desperate. Confused maybe ?? "
Or shy about social approval  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You would be surprised by the amount of straight guys who message bi guys. "
absolutely especially durning the lock down I was message 4 or 5 times by “straight guys “ seeing if I was up for fun .. not brave enough be call themselves bisexual but stupid enough to ask to meet ......
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
Yeah.. a few sending me messages constantly... And the profile says "straight"... Fcking desperate...lol
I wouldnt say desperate. Confused maybe ?? "
Everyone has their own reasons for not saying they are bi on their profile, be it fear, confusion, in denial or just plain lies.
I have had a 4 or 5 messages from 'straight' guys asking for meets. I always ask why they don't have bi on their profile, everytime the answer was the same, they say most women won't meet bi men so they have to say straight to better their chances.
I can't say for sure that is what they really think  |
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Fair point I see that with all swinger sites, it deserves an answer, some will say their partner or wife doesn't know and won't like it if they did, but to the rest of u who share profiles with partner what's your excuse why you say Ur straight but are really bi been bi dosent mean your gay your sexual preference shouldn't determine who you are or prefer to be in society that's just personal choice .so why hide or be ashamed of who or what you are.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do know of the block button. It would be worn out.
Bi on profile is a disaster. Leads to endless proposition messages without even a hello from men. Be they bi or straight.
Suck my cock or ill suck you dry messages ,10 times a day at the least. A real bi guy will not want to filter out men. Blocking them individually stops them messaging but at that you've have half the site blocked.
The problem is men and their lack of respect. ( not all men, before im told off ) |
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Does a sexual act deserve a label? Bruce is straight as he’s sexually attracted to women and that is his primary sexuality, but he is open to and has experienced many kinds of play in the moment.
We describe that as het exible?
For us the three options on fab are too restrictive.
Just our thoughts
X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does a sexual act deserve a label? Bruce is straight as he’s sexually attracted to women and that is his primary sexuality, but he is open to and has experienced many kinds of play in the moment.
We describe that as hetexible?
For us the three options on fab are too restrictive.
Just our thoughts
X"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately most guys join fab looking for a woman,
After a few days they realize the site is full of guys and the chances of meeting an actual woman is slim
Then they tend to move onto tv/CD's as at least they might get a bj from it lol
I get a few messages every day from straight guys dying to meet but all they want is a bj or sex but don't want to pleasure me in return |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
I suppose being bi your getting best of both worlds like it's been said I guess the thought of getting even more disinterest for coming out as bi may affect their confidence I would have no issue playing with both couples if that's how they play as I like going with the flow of things but I wouldn't meet a guy on his own just how I am I guess lol |
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Think this website would be well served by having 'hetero-flexible' as an option for sexuality.
To be honest this website seems to perpetuate a lot of gender norms and doesn't allow for more flexible interpretation of people's sexuality... other websites for sexual interests are a lot more forgiving in this context. |
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"...perpetuate a lot of gender norms and doesn't allow for more flexible interpretation..."
I don't want to blame the site, but this is certainly a cultural issue causing a lot of discussion.
There's a certain level of bi that's a different level of play.
There's something mildly homoerotic about a straight MFM (and honestly, I love that).
Then there are couples for whom the guy sucking your dick is the point of the exercise, and I'm not into that
Would be nice if our lexicon were more expressive in that respect all right. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think sexuality is fluid, you cant box folk off into clearly defined roles anymore... don't get me wrong, I LOVE women but the best BJ I ever got was from a guy ?? |
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"Does a sexual act deserve a label? Bruce is straight as he’s sexually attracted to women and that is his primary sexuality, but he is open to and has experienced many kinds of play in the moment.
We describe that as hetexible?
For us the three options on fab are too restrictive.
Just our thoughts
X"
I am straight,yet I am open and have experienced different kinds of play.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think this website would be well served by having 'hetero-flexible' as an option for sexuality.
To be honest this website seems to perpetuate a lot of gender norms and doesn't allow for more flexible interpretation of people's sexuality... other websites for sexual interests are a lot more forgiving in this context. "
Or as I've heard before: Fab-Straight |
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I never considered my self bi but never was repulsed by a cock or a naked guy playing close to me. I am the type of person to try everything once though and when an opportunity arose pardon the pun to try sucking a guys cock with 2 very sexy lady I did.
It was very horny and i enjoyed it. I realised it isnt guys I am into but the sexual act of playing with a cock. Being open minded enough to see it as a sexual act not about being bi straight or gay.
I have bi curious on my profile so there is no confusion |
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I would consider myself straight however as part of a mmf I would be quite happy to play along with both sexes in the interest of having good sex, why men who are actively looking for sex with other men don't consider themselves Bi is a mystery to me. I often get messages from straight men asking for pics and sex, I think it's just easier to say straight than come out and say bi.
It's also much easier for men to meet men, most women or couples on here won't give single guys a second look especially if you don't have many veris, that has been my experience anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m so far one of the ‘spoofers’. A lot of talk and no direct action yet. Anyway there is too much space between straight and bi. I have never looked at a guy in the street and been attracted but any decent frame on a woman I look and ponder and get that flutter. But I’m really interested in playing with a guy. Am I bi, don’t know but I don’t care. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've myself up as bi but I'm only curious about it and never actually tried it out. Open to trying everything once and my biggest fantasy is to have a mmf with a couple. I'm open to playing in front of guys and joining them but a lady would have to be involved too. I have no sexual attraction to guys but I have a massive sexual fantasy of being with a couple and seeing how it goes. Maybe confused would be a better label to put on myself  |
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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago
north and south |
"I’m so far one of the ‘spoofers’. A lot of talk and no direct action yet. Anyway there is too much space between straight and bi. I have never looked at a guy in the street and been attracted but any decent frame on a woman I look and ponder and get that flutter. But I’m really interested in playing with a guy. Am I bi, don’t know but I don’t care. "
Agree with swingme, Am straight forward male and love women , and had a 3 some with two straight women, who enjoyed our time together, but they still are straight , they wanted to expand on their sexual fun , They do not need to label them selves as bi and nor does anyone for that matter , Am straight myself but old gf of mine wanted a bi birthday present bi male and it was cool , but I never played with him but both had fun with the lady , Enjoy fabulous times everyone
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I think the best sex is where you totally loose yourself in the moment and your not even questioning who's bi and who's straight, your just going with the flow of that totally orgasmic moment and letting it all happen all at once all together gay/bi! Straight all together just doing what cums naturally to them. When you can truly loose all of your inhibitions and prejudices placed placed within you by society and just let all happen all together you will have truly had sex like never before 4 20 helps to enjoy all of the above  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m totally straight and I don’t think I’d be able to perform in a mmf
You can still have a mmF without having to have any sexual contact with the other male if you dont want to. "
I was going to say the same? Just cause there's two males doesn't mean anything has to happen between them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well it's XXI century. There are no specific labels anymore to be honest. But it's true that most of the guys aren't strictly straight anymore, or because hornyesss and desperation or just curiosity. Even they still clame to be straight cause bj from the guy or fucking a tranny without touching her dick is still under straight guidence lol. So isn't fair to compare themselves to fully straight forward strictly straight guys. I was going through this deniale myself couple of years ago. Of course no one wants to be called bi or gayilsh just because he done something once or being desperate for any sexual relase but is being compared to greedy bi guys who are going for some guy on guy action cause it's nearly impossible to score a female out here. I'm slagging bi people of being greedy and having both options hehe. Like my example. I'm straight acting but curious, kinky and open-minded. I don't fancy guys so I'm not gay. And not bi since bi can swing both ways. Bi curious well I'm not curious anymore about my sexuality or experimentention. I'm attracted to women and femininity. So if someone dress up I'm interested if they are really feminine and convincing. I do like Transexual/Transgender girl. And because I'm open-minded I don't mind to play in a 3 some scenarios with couples and soft bi play. But only if female is involved and turned on by that.
I think people are still too close minded and being really rude or uneducated if they are homofobic. And true some straight guys need to hide their curiosity and experimental meets cause they will be automatically crossed from most of the strict straight couples. |
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"Why is it that some men say they are straight,yet are looking for other men to have sexual intimacy with??Doesnt that make you bi ??
Why not be upfront and say you are bi ??
I would say on here the majority of women won't meet bi men. so they try hide it.
I am asking as a curios fabber.
Not trying to cause fights.
"
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By *murphMan
over a year ago
drogheda |
I would count myself as straight because guys on their own just dosnt turn me on but I’m comfortable being naked with guys regardless if they are gay or bi but just can’t get hard for a guy on his own but in a mmf situation and I’m hard I don’t care who feels me or sucks me does that make me bi? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a straight guy I’ve no issues with bi guys as others have said each to their own. I do enjoy mmf so hot watching a couple play together and joining and vice versa, but I only play with the woman. It is frustrating though that guys constantly message offering blow jobs |
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"As a straight guy I’ve no issues with bi guys as others have said each to their own. I do enjoy mmf so hot watching a couple play together and joining and vice versa, but I only play with the woman. It is frustrating though that guys constantly message offering blow jobs "
But isnt an mmf where guy's don't cross swords an mfm? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a straight guy I’ve no issues with bi guys as others have said each to their own. I do enjoy mmf so hot watching a couple play together and joining and vice versa, but I only play with the woman. It is frustrating though that guys constantly message offering blow jobs
But isnt an mmf where guy's don't cross swords an mfm?"
This explains why I didn't block males messaging me, it's because few few married dudes wanted to chat and know the person better before adding their wives on the fun, this was on the past when fab was new.
Even though while once fcking a lady for almost two hrs with her husband, she still asked if I was bi. I told no, I am not and we continued from there. It was a lovely Polish couple tho... Super friendly. |
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