FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > Something I will never understand
Something I will never understand
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I will never understand the hypocrisy of some people on here for example just read a ladies profile which stated:please don't message me if you don't have a clear face pic showing even though said lady has no profile pic up herself.maybe it's just me but this reeks of double standards |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you look at it from an economics point of view, it's a simple case of supply and demand. The more plentiful and readily available a resource is, the lower its value. Similarly the rarer something is, the more valuable and precious it becomes.
There are a 100 men for every women here, therefore men have to put in a greater effort to make the requirements of women.
If you want to blame anyone, blame the male obsession with sex, which place the all the bargaining chips in women's hands.
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The females and couples are in control here the vast majority of the time. The balance of power is uneven. Men arent used to that. They are used to having the upper hand in most things, so it's very uncomfortable for them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not a double standard, she gets hundreds of messages every day and needs a way to be able to sort them out without starting 100 conversations. I'm assuming you don't.
I think the real reason you're miffed, op, is that your odds of any success on this site are very low, nothing to do with this particular person at all. And as Gary has said you don't need to look very far if you want to apportion blame for that state of affairs. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Why not just ignore the ones who say that. No point in getting peeved off about it because it will never change. People on here always demand stuff the difference is you don't have to take any notice. I personally don't ask for face pics if we chat for a while normal we exchange pics. I get guys who send me face pics in first message try and demand i send face pics back. I don't as I didn't ask for theirs.
Just do fab your own way if you see something on a profile you don't like move on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will never understand the hypocrisy of some people on here for example just read a ladies profile which stated:please don't message me if you don't have a clear face pic showing even though said lady has no profile pic up herself.maybe it's just me but this reeks of double standards "
I get what you mean. I used to be requested for more pics even tho at the time 20+ of my pics were public. And mainly from profiles with zero pics. How I see it is that I would never as anybody to do something I am not ready to do myself... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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why would you be bothered by what someone else is looking for?
They have it stated on their profile so are up front about it.
Besides she can pretty much ask for diamond encrusted turds and some lads on here would offer them.
So the real issue is the desperate lads in here spamming profiles with zero pics and minimal effort put in, that allows for some women and couples to be a bit picky and arsey on profiles.
My advise is ignore them and concentrate on the people that match what your looking for, there are plenty out there |
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4 things..
1 as has been outlined earlier, its the simple power dynamic of fab, and that isn't changing anytime soon accept it or leave.
2 people can do whatever they like with thier profiles, accept it or leave
3, people won't give a shite if a man is outed as being on a swingers site, your face pic isn't going to be passed around on kik or WhatsApp groups by a group of women trying to identify you. For women on the other hand, that's a very differant proposition.
4. Whinging about it on the forum does you ZERO favours |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The females and couples are in control here the vast majority of the time. The balance of power is uneven. Men arent used to that. They are used to having the upper hand in most things, so it's very uncomfortable for them. "
True. There are countless situations in life where men naturally have the most power. Online dating is one case where the roles are flipped and women have all the power and leverage. Just have to accept it I suppose |
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You are coming from a position of self importance on this. You feel entitled to “equal” treatment here but you are not equal, you are an unverified man - bottom of the pile in the hierarchy.
I don’t say this to be mean, it’s just how it is. Try to think how your position feels, frustrating? Upsetting? Feel like a lesser person? Use this to feel empathy for minorities, immigrants and in some cases women in every day life. |
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Happy Sunday OP,
Yes we understand what you mean by people looking for photos who don't have any of themselves on their profile. Can we give you our view as a couple on how we send an initial mail.
FIRST:
We make sure we are what the profile is looking for (e.g. age, status, swap type)
-We view the profile. If it has no information, photos or validations but state that we must provide a photo on our initial mail. We close the profile and move on, not a second thought given.
-We view a profile who has no photos, but does have some information about themselves or what they are looking for and they have a validation from a profile we recognise as genuine or we have seen before, then we have no problem sending a photo on our initial mail to initiate contact.
With all the parties/socials and events now taking place in the country we would suggest you attend them and mingle, get to know a few people and you'd be very surprised how very social this scene can be. Some people who organise these events may want to meet you for a coffee or drink before inviting you just to establish you are genuine.
There are genuine people out here and we are lucky to have met many of them but as you see there are fake profiles. If it feels to good to be true, than it probably is would be our advise.
Hope that comes as some help, stay safe and when the time comes enjoy
EireCpl  |
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"why would you be bothered by what someone else is looking for?
They have it stated on their profile so are up front about it.
Besides she can pretty much ask for diamond encrusted turds and some lads on here would offer them.
So the real issue is the desperate lads in here spamming profiles with zero pics and minimal effort put in, that allows for some women and couples to be a bit picky and arsey on profiles.
My advise is ignore them and concentrate on the people that match what your looking for, there are plenty out there "
Boobs I'm still waiting on my delivery  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I agree with many of the comments above.
But OP I'll try help you out if the above isn't working. The only men that will hand over everything to someone who shows nothing, are the most desperate men on here. So just think about the quality of men she receives, those at the bottom of the pile, low self esteem, likely will fuck anything because their brain has collapsed under the pressures of desperation coming from their dick.
Now, if you feel like you've more offer someone, move on, and let those looking for desperation, get it.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree with many of the comments above.
But OP I'll try help you out if the above isn't working. The only men that will hand over everything to someone who shows nothing, are the most desperate men on here. So just think about the quality of men she receives, those at the bottom of the pile, low self esteem, likely will fuck anything because their brain has collapsed under the pressures of desperation coming from their dick.
Now, if you feel like you've more offer someone, move on, and let those looking for desperation, get it. "
Well said... |
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