FabSwingers.com > Forums > Ireland > What's your Why
What's your Why
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By *etergemma OP Couple
over a year ago
South Dublin Area |
We have been married for 18 years and together for 27 years. Our journey as ALT lifestylers occurred after a 'lifes too short' conversation following a bereavement.
We wanted to have a threesome and to be fair probably didn't think a lot after that but we came upon this lifestyle and almost 4 years later here we are. Experiencing some encounters and situations we never imagined we would from the first conversation we had about all this. A heap of rules has now just become 1 between us and we have evolved in this lifestyle together. We've made mistakes and continue to do so but we do it together as a couple and we have become a stronger, connected force because of all this.
Which kinda got me thinking, what triggered others to get involved in the ALT lifestyle, especially singles. I love an encounter with a swingle  but some have just joined to meet men or women and are not interested in meeting couples which obviously this site is predominantly based around.
So, without getting into intricate details obviously, what brought you here, to where you are today?
Have a tremendous Tuesday everyone (it is Tuesday right?)
Gemma x  |
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A guy from POF brought me to here! Haven't looked back since! Its been a rollercoaster of emotions and experiences! Wouldn't change a thing, met some really good people, some of whom are still friends 6 years later! I've loads more to experience as a swingle here. With dating comes drama lol
With Fab, good sex, friends and a fantastic social scene! Happy Days x |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I was chatting with my best mate and I had been celibate for a good few years. Mainly through not meeting anyone and I said how I really missed sex and she suggested joining here. So I did and it's been fun and interesting. Joining here has made me realise the kinks I kept hidden for most of my life aren't weird or something to be ashamed of and are actually fun and should be embraced.
I've been lucky and have met some amazing people both socially and for fun and have people who are true friends which I can continue to explore and have fun with.
This site while at times can be frustrating it has definitely opened my eyes to so many possibilities and to the fact that at my age I'm not over the hill and that life should be embraced and enjoyed.
But the friendships I have made on here are definitely one of the main reasons I stay. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hasn't been sexually active for years and lacking in confidence so friend recommended here.
I joined got the fright of my life and the first guy I met put myself in a very dangerous position. Deleted my account that day. Spoke to my friend and rejoined this time with filters.
Until I joined here I didn't know I was allowed enjoy sex , allowed to feel wanted and feel sexy. Over the couple of years here I have made some lifelong friends.
I have come along way from attending MnG's alone and not having the confidence to chat or mix with people. I have gained some confidence, had some good sex and I'm still learning about what I like and learning to like myself.
I have ignited my imagination and enjoy writing my stories.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I am being really honest what brought me here initially was a late night d*unken bored horny google.
Who I am and what I am looking for in life and from this site has changed a hell of alot since then.
I wish I had a better origan story but there it is |
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"We have been married for 18 years and together for 27 years. Our journey as ALT lifestylers occurred after a 'lifes too short' conversation following a bereavement. "
Similar to yourselves, following a 'lifes too short' conversation. No regrets, yet anyway. |
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By *s LollyWoman
over a year ago
The pub then supermacs ... |
I was married for 18yrs and for the first few yrs it was good...After we had kids i didn't work i stayed home and the boredom set in im not proud of what i done but had a few affairs over the last few yrs of my marriage,when it all came to ahead and my marriage ended i knew someone on here who suggested i join...Over the yrs on here i come to realise i proberly should never have married im someone who gets bored sexualy and always needs more and if im honest can't be faithful so here i get to have all the sexual fun i need and not hurt anyone in the process..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was married for 18yrs and for the first few yrs it was good...After we had kids i didn't work i stayed home and the boredom set in im not proud of what i done but had a few affairs over the last few yrs of my marriage,when it all came to ahead and my marriage ended i knew someone on here who suggested i join...Over the yrs on here i come to realise i proberly should never have married im someone who gets bored sexualy and always needs more and if im honest can't be faithful so here i get to have all the sexual fun i need and not hurt anyone in the process....."
similar story for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was single for 7 yrs in my 30s and when I originally started on the scene I just did cos I was never much into dragging strangers home from d*unken night outs and wanted a regular partner or partners without commitments I also became curious about girls and 3sums in the process...Ended up meeting a cpl (my first ever time meeting a cpl) and becoming their friend and Unicorn for a cpl of years.. the rest is history |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was very unhappily married to someone who was not very well mentally. But I had no option but to stay with him. But Christmas Eve 2016 he destroyed our family home during a bipolar episode leaving us with no heat or running water. I had no choice but to leave with the kids in the middle of the night with nothing but the clothes on our backs to start a new life in Kildare. Luckily for me I have a amazing family that helped me get out of a bad situation.
The shitty beginning has a happy ending as I joined Fetlife a year later and made many great female and who empowered me and helped me to be the confident lady I am today. One of them said I should join Fab for the craic and I was like no thanks don't want to be on the Sunday World anytime soon. But I joined out of curiosity and I am so glad I did. I get to enjoy sex now and live out my wildest fantasies instead of pretending to like it or avoid it for months at a time. I hated my body where I joined Fab but now I look at it and like what I see. So Fab has definitely changed me for the better. |
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By *eminexWoman
over a year ago
some where in outer space |
Similar to some of the above ,. ...married and together with him many years staying at home with the children while fulfilling I just found myself wondering whtif .... suggested swinging to him and he was adamant no he probably thought I was joking ....
Roll on another while and I just wasn't happy so I ended my marriage I never physically cheated but I had online  ....
I found this site through Kik I'd never heard of it before ...
And here I am I've enjoyed it so far and I've met some lovely ppl ...there's so much out there to do and try and life is to short to be anything but happy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have been married for 18 years and together for 27 years. Our journey as ALT lifestylers occurred after a 'lifes too short' conversation following a bereavement.
We wanted to have a threesome and to be fair probably didn't think a lot after that but we came upon this lifestyle and almost 4 years later here we are. Experiencing some encounters and situations we never imagined we would from the first conversation we had about all this. A heap of rules has now just become 1 between us and we have evolved in this lifestyle together. We've made mistakes and continue to do so but we do it together as a couple and we have become a stronger, connected force because of all this.
Which kinda got me thinking, what triggered others to get involved in the ALT lifestyle, especially singles. I love an encounter with a swingle but some have just joined to meet men or women and are not interested in meeting couples which obviously this site is predominantly based around.
So, without getting into intricate details obviously, what brought you here, to where you are today?
Have a tremendous Tuesday everyone (it is Tuesday right?)
Gemma x "
Hard to pinpoint one exact reason why l'm here but all l know is l can be myself and not feel under pressure in anyway to be anything else. |
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Interesting thread. We have always been open to new things but we saw the Girl from kk on the late late show about 5 years ago and we both thought it would be fun to go check it out. We laid out our rules and were very lucky to meet a fantastic bunch in our first night. Never really looked back.
We've made some great real would friends through fab since joining and a much larger group of friends on the site. All in all in been really positive and has definitely added to our relationship |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Joined years ago on recommendation from an old hook up. Left and rejoined numerous times before joined with an ex. Split up with him and finally got to enjoy the site properly. Got fed up with the drama and bullshit then left again. Came back met j left again to focus on us then we both came back together. |
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I suppose I was always interested in kink and exploring my bi side. I came out of a toxic relationship and had a fuck buddy who suggested we try the scene for a 3some! I originally joined another site and along the way realised i didnt particularly like my fuck buddy either! I joined fab but initially had a bad experience so left and after my first party j rejoined!
Have to say I havent looked back this time around, I've gotten to explore some long held fantasies and have acquired plenty more! I've also met some really great people and made fantastic friends along the way! I have learned a lot about myself as well. |
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By *etergemma OP Couple
over a year ago
South Dublin Area |
Fellow lifestylers, I'm so in love with everyone's responses here.
What positivity and freedom these chance encounters and conversations have given us all. A common bond we all share.
The chance of finding ourselves and one another and connecting on an immense level in our relationships with not only our other halves if we have them but with ourselves.
This community might be small here but its large enough to make us all fit in regardless of our why.
Thanks for sharing xx |
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By *adylaceWoman
over a year ago
Waterford City |
I had always been curious to play with women but never had the courage to do anything about it. A guy I chatted to on Pof suggested I try here and I discovered the same as most men have. It’s actually quite difficult to get a meet with women here. Lol. I ended up playing with a couple instead and I was completely hooked. That all happened in 2012 and I’ve never looked back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My why is to fulfil unmet needs . The longer I have been here the more I have evolved and the more those needs have changed . As I look back on my life I see a lot of explanations for who I am now . I used to judge myself but have got past that stage and now see my sexuality as one of the core elements to who I am rather than trying to suppress it.
Certainly as a cd it's something I found hard to be open with for so long. Having been at many swing parties over the years I've come to realise most folks within this community in that environment don't judge or at least are not rude to express such judgement .
As humans we crave safe connections within a tribe and for me this environment has so far nourished that. Haven't met anyone in months as personal life has other pressing commitments but in time when everything settles I hope to get back to normality here. |
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By *oseredWoman
over a year ago
Dublin |
I joined many years ago as a couple. He knew I wanted/needed to explore all the things I had repressed thinking there was something wrong with me, and he introduced me to world full of like minded people. We started my journey together and when we parted I stay on and here I am, still enjoying the journey. |
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By *ol_ieMan
over a year ago
Dublin west |
Been around for years and years.. have been and gone and came back again.
Always just wanted to meet like minded people who not afraid to go and get what they wanted.
Have met some great people.. have lost some great people.
Have had unbelievable highs and have had my heart broken.
But at least I can say I tried and have a head full of memories.
Life is short so you have to grab it.
And I have enough life in me to make a few more memorable moments..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We're together 14 years, we were only ever with each other sexually before here. It started with a guy who was flirting with her over snapchat and I encouraged her to flirt back. It led to us talking about fantasies we were interested in. I stumbled across Fab and here we are.
We had a couple of threesomes, went to some parties and then we decided to open up the relationship to see people on our own. We always intended on meeting only as a couple but it evolved and changed as we figured out what we both enjoyed. It's been absolutely amazing!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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8 yrs in a really bad marriage meet a really nice fb and now very good friend aswell on another site she told me about fab so i joined up then virus hit so hopefully the experiences still to cum looking forward to them |
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By *etergemma OP Couple
over a year ago
South Dublin Area |
Morning everyone
Your openness to share your why is truly uplifting and inspiring. Thank you for taking the time on this post.
Reading everyone's why has really brought clarity to my initial wonderings. Everyone deserves the chance to be themselves and explore the kinks, curiosities and sexual liberation life has hidden away for us.
Keep your why close to you and if you get sidetracked somewhere along the way, try to remember it and take solice in the knowledge you have about yourself. You know who you are and you are accepted in this world. This has happened me several times on this journey, getting lost, but I always re centre and realise I am who I am and I know who I am and I have a husband who supports me and I of course return this support (except when he snores, I'm not pretty then!).
But w@nkers lookin to meet during this time. They can fook off    
Have a wonderful Wednesday |
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I was working away in the UK and when Pinks came over for a holiday we talked about going to a local club. She always had bi tendencies and wanted to explore. Met some cool people who pointed us towards Fab.
Since then we have fulfilled nearly all our fantasies, made loads of friends, hosted a social, and found out we were polyamorous too.
So all in all an enjoyable rollercoaster that's only stopped for essential rep |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was in a seriously boring sex relationship for a very long time, then found out the ex had cheated on me with a friend of mine on fab, curiosity got the best of me and joined fab, on and off for a while but helped me explore my sexuality and good long sex session helps a lot. |
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By *man79Man
over a year ago
newry dundalk. warrenpoint |
I was in a relationship for 20 years married for 14 of them. One night I was told she didn’t love me anymore and wanted a separation and I had to move out no other explanation!! This isolation from the corona is exactly what My last 3 months in the house was like So many questions. And so few answers! It was horrific for me and my mental health some nights I slept in work to avoid going home. A few months later a friend suggested fab so I logged on had a wee look and logged off I was no where near ready for it. So I decided do I sit at home and let this consume me or do I get up and attack everyday like it was the last. I ran 5/10ks. Climbed mountains. Basically filled my days up keeping busy until I regained my confidence which was completely shot Now here I am meeting new people on fab having the craic and whatever happens happens. Most of all I’m just being me !
Bman79  |
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By *etergemma OP Couple
over a year ago
South Dublin Area |
Wow, thank you all so much for sharing such intimate stories here. It has certainly brought me a far greater understanding of the swingletons fab has on offer. Amazing stories xx
Hoping your Thursday has been tremendous my fellow kinksters. You rock my boat!!
Gemma x |
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I was single,and horny( what's new),had known about fab for couple of years,decided to join.
My first party I went to Dublin.
Met quiet a few amazing people.
And you Petergemma.
I remember the conversation with youse.
I have never looked back.
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We don’t have much of an origin story tbh... Years of pillow talk and suggestion from Ben resulted into him setting up a singles profile for my amusement(!) which quickly turned into a couples account... turns out he was far more in tune to my kinkier side than I was! Who says men aren’t perceptive?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In a nutshell: heard at work and was curious to find out whats the craic
I was divorced with no sex life, workaholic type of person. Long and interesting journey with a happy end: we are married now |
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We had separate profile on an other site, we met though I was reluctant with age, turned out I had known him by sight from about city and had the hots for him, we had the most fantastic sex, fuckbuddies then for a year and joined profiles, I stopped meeting on my own, we came to fab, got serious and married now 10years, our profile is still on aff anyone wants to look xxxx was my single
Stacey x |
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» Add a new message to this topic
and excitement 
Before FAB, I had been in a few long term relationships 
