FabSwingers.com > Forums > Introductions > Loosing my virginity
Loosing my virginity
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips |
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OP you would definitely be better off finding a girlfriend out in the real world. You can learn together!
The ladies of fab know what we want and we go out and get it. We are here for our pleasure and have no desire to be a teacher. From my own experiences I have found the more inexperienced men to be a big disappointment and I'm here for thrills not disappointment. |
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So you don’t mind disappointing an older lady OP? 
You’re young, there are loads of virgins a similar age to you, don’t feel under any pressure to have sex. My advice would be to wait, save it for someone who might mean something to you as you only get to lose it the once.
Best of luck.
Lou x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So you don’t mind disappointing an older lady OP?
You’re young, there are loads of virgins a similar age to you, don’t feel under any pressure to have sex. My advice would be to wait, save it for someone who might mean something to you as you only get to lose it the once.
Best of luck.
Lou x "
Well if i got a woman off this they would know what they're getting into |
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"So you don’t mind disappointing an older lady OP?
You’re young, there are loads of virgins a similar age to you, don’t feel under any pressure to have sex. My advice would be to wait, save it for someone who might mean something to you as you only get to lose it the once.
Best of luck.
Lou x
Well if i got a woman off this they would know what they're getting into"
That comes across as because they are on a sex site they should expect crap sex 
Get yersel a cargo and go up the dancing mate |
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You need to change your perspective OP.
It’s a swinging site. Most women are here to have a connection / friendship with people and if it leads to more then awesome.
Those who are just looking for a fuck are almost certainly going to be looking for those who are more experienced.
This website is brutal for single guys anyway. You’d be far better off finding someone via more traditional routes. |
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips "
We honestly think you have the wrong idea of this site OP.
This is not a free sex site. A site for people who cannot get it in real life and think it will be easy on here.
Most people will look at this as a site where experienced people enjoy the experiences that others have to offer.
Ask yourself this:
WHAT DO I HAVE TO OFFER?
You may then see what other people see.
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips "
Why do you want people to put '123' in messages they send you? |
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips
Why do you want people to put '123' in messages they send you?"
Because he’s inundated with messages and wants to filter out the ones who haven’t read his profile, obviously.
Lou x |
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips
Why do you want people to put '123' in messages they send you?
Because he’s inundated with messages and wants to filter out the ones who haven’t read his profile, obviously.
Lou x "
I did wonder why he was struggling Lou!
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If I may put my view across here, its not a competition, you arent there to be some sex god, and have no expectations you will have no disappointments.
Don't go off what you see on porn films, thats all false. Your first time should be enjoyable, and getting to know your new partner.
Also it isnt a race, just take your time and be yourself. You only get one shot at this |
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The thing is, a lot of inexperienced people are rubbish in bed. The other thing is, a lot of people have had a lot of crap sex and don't want any more.
On a site where women can often have anyone they want to, going for someone who doesn't know what they're doing is unbelievably unlikely. What's to be gained from sex that's almost certainly going to be bad, with a direction to provide education to boot?
Outside a specific kind of kink scenario, I don't think you're going to get anywhere, OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op, you're very young and even with experience are likely to struggle on here. Go find a girlfriend/boyfriend in the real world and experiment and explore.
Most ladies here are looking to push limits and boundaries, to enjoy climaxing at the hands of an experienced lover...
Saying that, if you're just looking to pop your cherry I'm sure there's a few about fab who would happily give you a couple of minutes to do that!
Peach x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good thing im not asking you"
Don’t be a petulant young man, that helps for a start. If that’s your response to anyone pointing out that you’re not for them- you are very young and inexperienced- you will stay a virgin for a lot longer.
Find a girl your own age, have fun experimenting, but don’t think that you being a virgin will make women want to meet you. It’s not actually a selling point, but as said, sure someone will help you out.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well why does she feel the need to come on to my post just to say shes not attracted to me"
Why assume she’s not attracted to you personally? Have you considered the fact you’re a virgin would be the reason? You asked for opinions, her response is probably one you’ll get from many.
Afraid you are not doing yourself any favours. This is a public forum, you will get people saying things that you don’t like, it’s not necessarily mean, but is a response. It’s how you respond that people notice |
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"Well why does she feel the need to come on to my post just to say shes not attracted to me"
Given you have no photos available, no one is saying they're not attracted to you, because there's nothing to see.
What she's probably saying is that the scenario doesn't attract her. Which is helpful. I suspect the overwhelming majority of real women (not those faking who they are and/or escorts) will not be interested in what you have to offer. You may think me unkind, but I'm trying to save you time and angst. Fab is hard for men. Much harder if you're under 25 or 30. You have other factors against you as well. As another poster pointed out, a lot of us are here to fulfil fantasies. Threesomes, gangbangs, etc. Not relive the bumbling sex we had when we were younger.
I was a virgin at 18. There's no shame in it. But don't waste your time here. |
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"Well its not very easy getting a gf irl because im not the best looking "
Fab isn't a place for guys to get easy sex. Women are inundated with attention and men often get ignored. If you're way younger than most will consider, inexperienced, and (going by what you're saying) unattractive... Seriously. Don't waste your time here. Meet people through hobbies, charm women with your personality and talents. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I lost my virginity at 18 to my ex husband, it was quick and not satisfying, but it meant something as I saved it for someone I loved.
Find someone who means something to you, unless all you want is sex? Do you think that losing your virginity to a stranger on a swingers site will be easier? I get that losing it to someone local, your own age and more experienced may have its problems- is the fear that people do talk and if it’s less than memorable others will hear about it?
Why choose somewhere like this? It’s unlikely to be successful unless you make yourself a more attractive proposition. You need people in a niche market, looking for someone like you, that’s likely to be more of a kink, and ego driven. Most people are on here for mutual pleasure with people who are experienced and have something more than virginity to offer. Good luck though |
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Yeah, I lost my virginity at 19, and it was terrible. I didn't know women could have orgasms until I was 25!  And he made me feel like a horrible person for hoping to get something out of it.
I'm not a selfish lover. Far from it. But I'd sooner pluck my toenails out than go back to someone inexperienced. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm just scared to disappoint someone, about if i do feel a connection with someone and we have sex then they're not interested anymore because the sex is shit |
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"I'm just scared to disappoint someone, about if i do feel a connection with someone and we have sex then they're not interested anymore because the sex is shit"
If you have a connection and you’re honest about your lack of experience the right person will feel honoured to share the experience with you.
Lou x |
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"I'm just scared to disappoint someone, about if i do feel a connection with someone and we have sex then they're not interested anymore because the sex is shit"
At your age a lot of sex is shit. It just is. Go with someone on a similar point on the learning curve to you, rather than someone who knows what's possible in a way many people never find out.
Free advice: communicate. Trying to mind read makes for crap sex. It's OK to not know and to ask questions, it's human, it creates connection, and it might help you do better. This includes listening (to cues like breathing as well as words).
We're all different and we all like different things. Try things gently and slowly, and ask how you're doing.
Be OK with learning.
Ignore porn, it's nothing like the real thing. |
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"Any tip on how to actually get the girl in the first place "
Lose the term "get the girl". We're people, not objects.
Be yourself, meet people. Often without the goal of a relationship or sex, that can come across as desperate. Same sort of thing as finding friends, but with an extra dimension. (but don't think friendship means you're owed sex, sometimes that's what you get and it's great) Ask if they're interested, be prepared to take no for an answer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips "
this is the last place to find what you want.
just get out in the real world and meet real ppl. build a friendship. let things happen naturally.
I can't imagine any older woman would be interested going on the conversations I have with my friends. we aren't teachers and most of us (my age) don't want to play with guys young enough to be our kids |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm looking to lose my virginity to an older woman so they can teach me how to fuck good
But a few people have said it would be better it doing with people my own age but my problem is i'm scared that I'll disappoint the girl and it's not easy finding someone my own age
So really im just looking for your opinions and tips "
It's a niche market, but there will be a few older women into this.
However, you're more likely to disappoint an older partner with inexperience than a younger one; more younger women are hung up on their own performance and generally see being good at sex as giving the impression of a porn star.
B |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hello mate! First of all the most inportant problem that you have is about love your self, becouse if you don't love you first you Will can not love no body and that's mean if you're not secure and feel confident you will never make feel comfortable the person who will be with you and the sex will be a cold nightmare....believe me the exterior is not that inportant if you are beutifull in side and respectful and looking for make happy the other person first than you will help you to change your mind and your personality becoming a better person...this side like the people say to you is not for cover your necessity oviusly,is for share and enjoy our best with wonderful peaple who love to enjoy with the most human sense... and one more good thing you to know can help you is if you think you can not make happy to ending the person who is with you just use your tongue passionately and soft to make her feel enjoy and you will see that you don't need to be a pornostart or have very big dick ....and much better find in the real life a girl more or less like you! we are in a world like test and colours are dependent of what you like ..you know...good luck mate I hope you will open your mind and your eyes....is good to learn every single day to the end of our life...be all ways open for learn that will make you grow up inside and become a better person in this life...you are not like the way you show am sure but just confuse......think about recognise rectify and work for it  |
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"Thanks to everyone for the help and advice "
This isn’t meant to be nasty, but you are a single, male, virgin on a swingers site. Everyone is here for their own pleasure and you don’t really bring much to the table if you are looking for women. You’ve probably had all the attention you are going to get already. If you aren’t having any luck meeting people naturally, try POF or Tinder or something like that. You’re just wasting your time here. Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hello mate! First of all the most inportant problem that you have is about love your self, becouse if you don't love you first you Will can not love no body and that's mean if you're not secure and feel confident you will never make feel comfortable the person who will be with you and the sex will be a cold nightmare....believe me the exterior is not that inportant if you are beutifull in side and respectful and looking for make happy the other person first than you will help you to change your mind and your personality becoming a better person...this side like the people say to you is not for cover your necessity oviusly,is for share and enjoy our best with wonderful peaple who love to enjoy with the most human sense... and one more good thing you to know can help you is if you think you can not make happy to ending the person who is with you just use your tongue passionately and soft to make her feel enjoy and you will see that you don't need to be a pornostart or have very big dick ....and much better find in the real life a girl more or less like you! we are in a world like test and colours are dependent of what you like ..you know...good luck mate I hope you will open your mind and your eyes....is good to learn every single day to the end of our life...be all ways open for learn that will make you grow up inside and become a better person in this life...you are not like the way you show am sure but just confuse......think about recognise rectify and work for it "
Hope that was cut n paste bloody hell |
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Kid this isn’t a place for a easy fuck or to loose your virginity sorry if this is sounding harsh but the women on here are looking for certain things and maybe to some a virgin is what they are looking for but most aren’t. |
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"Good thing im not asking you"
Umm, being rude to other women might affect your chances kiddo. Most of the women in your demographic of choice have children your age or older. That's why you will be a definite no for them.
Also it can take months to get even a social meet on here.
You are EXTREMELY unlikely to ever meet someone from here so I'd advise you use a dating app. You'll have more luck. |
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"Any tip on how to actually get the girl in the first place
Lose the term "get the girl". We're people, not objects.
Be yourself, meet people. Often without the goal of a relationship or sex, that can come across as desperate. Same sort of thing as finding friends, but with an extra dimension. (but don't think friendship means you're owed sex, sometimes that's what you get and it's great) Ask if they're interested, be prepared to take no for an answer. "
100% this |
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"I'm just scared to disappoint someone, about if i do feel a connection with someone and we have sex then they're not interested anymore because the sex is shit"
This is exactly what is likely to happen if you meet someone through this site.
To be honest, I am at a loss. I became a mother at an advanced age and have a daughter your age. The only advice I can give you is KEEP THE HECK AWAY FROM UNIVERSITY STUDENTS! Just in case, you see...
And yes, seriously, there is no rush. Change your priorities. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You shouldn’t really be on this site. It’s for people who want a varied exciting sex life.
If losing your virginity means so much, go get a prostitute. Or try actually trying to charm a girl your age. But the majority of women aren’t going to be interested.
The big problem with this site is a lot of men think they are intitled to sex just because they are on here. |
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This place and lifestyle can fuck you up at the age where you think you can deal with it
At your age it's the last thing you want to develop your sexuality.
Get down local places where you can interact with girls your own age- learn how to chat them up, make them laugh, flirt with them. Learn how to deal with rejection.
This place isn't healthy for you at your age. |
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"This place and lifestyle can fuck you up at the age where you think you can deal with it
At your age it's the last thing you want to develop your sexuality.
Get down local places where you can interact with girls your own age- learn how to chat them up, make them laugh, flirt with them. Learn how to deal with rejection.
This place isn't healthy for you at your age."
It's difficult to make this place work psychologically when you are a bit more experienced. |
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Good luck, mate. 