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Is this a normal or unusual experience? Or did I get caught with my pants down..

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

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By *RIDAY NIGHT LADYWoman over a year ago

Bolton

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

Maybe just got cold feet, and to stop having any grief blocked you.

Can I ask had you talked on the phone?

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

I did ask for there number but said they don't give it out. They basically said they value there privacy and i tbink she had kid but tbh who knows. Should of trusted my gut cause that was massive warning like not getting her number.

Aye your probably right, thing is I did say if you can't make it's not a problem because she's got a kid. I only replied to messages she sent me so wasn't pushy. Just didn't get the whole block thing but oh well it is what it is.

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By *iversong321Woman over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

"I did ask for there number but said they don't give it out. They basically said they value there privacy and i tbink she had kid but tbh who knows. Should of trusted my gut cause that was massive warning like not getting her number.

Not giving phone numbers out proves nothing. I never give mine out on here. Too many wack jobs.

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

Not giving phone numbers out proves nothing. I never give mine out on here. Too many wack jobs."

That makes sense, totally understand your reasoning and logic. It's why I chose to go to a hotel for first meet. Because I didn't want a stranger knowing where I live. This has totally enforced it tbh.

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By *iscean MaleMan over a year ago

Darlaston

Just put it down to exerience.. in a wierd way at least "she" told you and you was not left waiting.

This is one of the reasons I never meet without a phone call..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I always insist on speaking to a prospective meet on the phone 1st. I just give them my PAYG 'meets' phone number and tell them to withold their number if they feel the need to.

The truth is you will probably never know for certain and they could have been a timewaster, man pretending to be a woman or they could have just got cold feet.

Any method of verification is also pretty fraught and unreliable and I have had guys/mf couples with multiple verifications on their profile cancel at last minute or just ghost me. It is all part of the site unfortunately.

Sorry to hear about the hotel though - that must have been irritating...and is the reason why I never go booking hotels that don't have a last minute no/low penalty canx option!

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

might be just to embarrased to chat after letting you down

could be a bloke getting off on it too

i always book hotels with free cancellation up till noon on the day

or i just go to the hotel and get pissed in the bar lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

"
she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"Just put it down to exerience.. in a wierd way at least "she" told you and you was not left waiting.

This is one of the reasons I never meet without a phone call.."

Aye live and learn and that. And true be worse if she not said anything at all. So close to a first meet and yet so far lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

should have meet in public place first or club.

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"I always insist on speaking to a prospective meet on the phone 1st. I just give them my PAYG 'meets' phone number and tell them to withold their number if they feel the need to.

The truth is you will probably never know for certain and they could have been a timewaster, man pretending to be a woman or they could have just got cold feet.

Sorry to hear about the hotel though - that must have been irritating...and is the reason why I never go booking hotels that don't have a last minute no/low penalty canx option!

Good luck"

Thanks for the reply and solid advice. Will definitely be getting a number first or just go for a coffee. Way cheaper and makes sense for both of us.

Aye I figured people with verifications would show but guess it's luck of the draw. After all were all human and shit happens. Just annoying and probably not a good idea to arrange a meet on a Monday morning lol Anyway onwards and upwards from now on hopefully

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"might be just to embarrased to chat after letting you down

could be a bloke getting off on it too

i always book hotels with free cancellation up till noon on the day

or i just go to the hotel and get pissed in the bar lol"

Yea a drink a right about now be good, knowing my luck they probably ran out of alcohol lol

Could be embarrassed I suppose but would of understood if something came up. Been polite and never sent an unpleasant message to anyone on here.

Yea definitely doing the hotel and social first. Best way forward I think if I can't speak on the phone.

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"should have meet in public place first or club."

Aye should of done a public place, cheaper, safer and if it works out and if it don't...no harm done.

Would do a club but not been out in ages and not overly confident at the mo. Probably a better place to go just would be intimidating for me. Something to aim for tho would be nice to go and meet people.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not giving phone numbers out proves nothing. I never give mine out on here. Too many wack jobs."

Yes plus speaking on the phone doesn't mean they'll turn up either

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Always arrange to meet socially for a coffee in the first instance. Lets hope you dont make that mistake again eh.

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By *orticiaWoman over a year ago

Wirral

"Always arrange to meet socially for a coffee in the first instance. Lets hope you dont make that mistake again eh."

I always think a social meet first is best - you know they’re genuine & you know if you click or not!

Better luck next time OP!!

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By *exymidscouple2017Couple over a year ago

Birmingham

Not giving phone numbers out proves nothing. I never give mine out on here. Too many wack jobs."

Same here. We never give ours out either. All communication is made through fab.

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By *lorious hole bs16Man over a year ago

Bristol

Sorry to hear about your experience,its not nice to be treated like that..

Even if it was embarrassment I would still report it as it's rude and cowardly plus she/ he maybe doing it to others, let admin decide.In my experience

people get off on many strange things!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

"
you should have got the phone call in .......i always like a phone call prior to a meet

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sorry to hear about your experience,its not nice to be treated like that..

Even if it was embarrassment I would still report it as it's rude and cowardly plus she/ he maybe doing it to others, let admin decide.In my experience

people get off on many strange things!!!"

I dont get why you think it was rude and cowardly, she changed her mind, its allowed. I feel if she was fake or playing games she wouldnt have even let him know, would have just blocked or not turned uo

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By *lorious hole bs16Man over a year ago

Bristol

"Sorry to hear about your experience,its not nice to be treated like that..

Even if it was embarrassment I would still report it as it's rude and cowardly plus she/ he maybe doing it to others, let admin decide.In my experience

people get off on many strange things!!!

I know my wife keeps telling me, it's a woman's prerogative!

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By *taffsfun73Man over a year ago

Newcastle under lyme

Go a club you will love it and I'm sure you would do well it's not as hard as you think it will be. It's just like been in a really friendly pub lol

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By *egs11ABCWoman over a year ago

Aberdeen

Always have a social 1st. But even with regard meets we book the cancel free up until 1pm on the day option cos one of us has had to cancel due to work /family commitment x

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By *c-ukMan over a year ago

Sevenoaks

The fact that "she" responded to one of your messages makes me very suspicious. Women usually delete or delete unread..

Sounds like a dude to me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

you should have got the phone call in .......i always like a phone call prior to a meet

Phone calls mean nothing in my experience. Lots of people get off on speaking the phone but still have no intention of meeting.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

you should have got the phone call in .......i always like a phone call prior to a meet

Phone calls mean nothing in my experience. Lots of people get off on speaking the phone but still have no intention of meeting. "
phone calls are a great indication of personality and whether you will get on when you meet everyone I've spoken to on phone has turned up

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By *opping_candyWoman over a year ago

West Yorkshire

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

you should have got the phone call in .......i always like a phone call prior to a meet

Phone calls mean nothing in my experience. Lots of people get off on speaking the phone but still have no intention of meeting. phone calls are a great indication of personality and whether you will get on when you meet everyone I've spoken to on phone has turned up

Not if you hate talking on the phone...I have a bizarre phone-based anxiety. I never talk on the phone before a meet.

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By *ringles0510Woman over a year ago

Central Borders

It is unfortunately very common. At least she let you know before hand, most wouldn't. Maybe arrange to meet for a coffee, or a few drinks first next time? Less pressure and will save you a lot of money if it falls through x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So I have been chatting with a certain someone for like 2 weeks or so. We arranged to have a meet today which of cause I paid for the hotel and isn't a problem.

Then at like 5 hours before the meet (this is at 4am she messaged me)says something like 'Aww sorry got cold feet" this is fine because we all have a life and things crop up.

But not only did she send that message but she blocked me. Now I can't figure out why she would do that or make sense of it. I mean she could of blocked me from the start.

Is it possible it is a Male pretending to be Female? I know she's not been suspended. Because I saw the blue circle next her name on the messages she sent, so she was online.

Oh and she's been verified too so thought was a safe bet. So this leads me too...Is there many fake profiles that are verified or am I being paranoid

Maybe someone could explain and is normal experience on Fabswingers. Haha today turned out to be the most expensive day for just a wank

she's a rep for the hotel industry just goes round trying to get guys to book hotel rooms ,damn pest

Haha yeah and she's bloody good at it too or he is

you should have got the phone call in .......i always like a phone call prior to a meet

Not if you hate talking on the phone...I have a bizarre phone-based anxiety. I never talk on the phone before a meet. "
how are you in person though ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It is unfortunately very common. At least she let you know before hand, most wouldn't. Maybe arrange to meet for a coffee, or a few drinks first next time? Less pressure and will save you a lot of money if it falls through x"
bet you don't even eat Pringles

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By *ablo minibar123Woman over a year ago

How many veris did they have? Were they visable to read? If it was just one then possibly they could have been fake and verified themselves by using another fake account.

This is an example of why it's generally best to have a social meet before you get to the booking hotel stage.

I'm sorry this is happened op, but you are showing a good attitude about it, your profile isn't half bad tbh, you'll get a meet soon I'm sure x

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By *esparate danMan over a year ago

glasgow

Whose idea was it to meet at a hotel first?

Ive had first meets in hotel and it has lucky worked out ...but its definitely a risky maneouvre to assume that youll both definitely want to bone there and then after meeting

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think it's better to meet in a club than a hotel, then if it's a no-show you could still have a good time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think it's better to meet in a club than a hotel, then if it's a no-show you could still have a good time."
great for a woman who gets on free or a nominal charge not for the guy paying £40 and wanting a connection

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think it's better to meet in a club than a hotel, then if it's a no-show you could still have a good time.great for a woman who gets on free or a nominal charge not for the guy paying £40 and wanting a connection

"
in

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By *ringles0510Woman over a year ago

Central Borders

bet you don't even eat Pringles

I eat pringles

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

bet you don't even eat Pringles

I eat pringles

"
with that figure ........noooooooo

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By *tew2009Man over a year ago

wakefield

I reckon there are others with similar experiences, unfortunately, a lot of timewasters on here, maybe we should ask admin for a section where people can post their experiences then we can check them out?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Asking for a phone number or social, judge them by their response,

There is someone on here called Bob, who pretends to be a couple, He contacted me, after a week of exchanged messages, I booked a day off work, on the day, messages ignored, and then he blocked me, I reported him, but his profile os still up.

I tend to go for same day meets, It works for me

Perhaps we should give tips on spotting fakes and time wasters

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By *emel9Man over a year ago

West Midlands

Personally I always tend to go for a social meet somewhere half way between us, big pub usually...that way I haven't travelled too far if they are simply a no show and I've not spent money on a hotel room I no longer need.

At least in this case you were told, and not just a no show.

Hotel meets are for a second meet after a social if I get on with them. Some people get scared at the last minute by the first meet being in a hotel...some feel it implies fun is certain and therefore it's risky.

Either that or arrange to meet at a club night. That way you are with other friendly people if you are bailed on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But presumably a hotel room would cost more so don't see the problem?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But presumably a hotel room would cost more so don't see the problem?"
depends where it is I get a nice room in Weymouth £25

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But presumably a hotel room would cost more so don't see the problem?depends where it is I get a nice room in Weymouth £25

Well if it's money rather than the whole lifestyle which is your priority, then fair enough, stick to Weymouth

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I reckon there are others with similar experiences, unfortunately, a lot of timewasters on here, maybe we should ask admin for a section where people can post their experiences then we can check them out?"

Again, I dont see why she should be considered a timewaster, she let him know she would not be there, changing your mind is not timewasting. She saod she got cold feet, it could have been anything he said that changed her mind. Unfortunate he lost money on a hotel, but if she had turned up and not felt an attraction, said no thanks, would she be a timewaster then? End result would be same, hotel room paid for and not being used. Its just the chance you take booking a room

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

She could just have cold feet, but leaving it 'till 4am, when there was little chance for a response, and blocking are the hallmarks of a time waster.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But presumably a hotel room would cost more so don't see the problem?depends where it is I get a nice room in Weymouth £25

Well if it's money rather than the whole lifestyle which is your priority, then fair enough, stick to Weymouth "
I base nothing in this lifestyle on money more on people and their willingness to be flexible

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

She could just have cold feet, but leaving it 'till 4am, when there was little chance for a response, and blocking are the hallmarks of a time waster."

I' m very intolerant of the "cold feet" excuse personally - particularly in view of the money spent. Best to have a social first otherwise club meet when you've never met someone before

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

Thanks everyone for all your feed back and advice. I would go through you all individually and thank but way too many. Nice to see the Fabswingers community alive and very helpful. Appreciate it and hopefully help any newcomers with my experience and your advive.

Definitely learnt my lesson. I will just put it down to a learning experience and will not be repeated again. Fingers crossed

I'll swap numbers first and if they don't feel comfortable or for what ever reason. Social meet it is so it's more relaxed and no harm done if it's not to be.

Would like to go to a Swingers club but not quite ready for that. If they are like you guys on the forum tho than I have got nothing to worry about.

Thanks everyone

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Word of advice. You don't need to prebook a hotel before a meet. That's just setting yourself up. Counting your chickens before they hatch. You'll be saving money. You'll be surprised that you can get a room quite quickly. Desperation always spells disaster. Whatever happened to a social first.....

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By *utik OP Man over a year ago

Durham

"Word of advice. You don't need to prebook a hotel before a meet. That's just setting yourself up. Counting your chickens before they hatch. You'll be saving money. You'll be surprised that you can get a room quite quickly. Desperation always spells disaster. Whatever happened to a social first....."

Yep you're right I should of engaged my brain and not my....first. It was my first meet so wasn't thinking straight.

Learnt my lesson with the hotel and I'm definitely not doing that again. Yeah I was too keen and desperate

stupidity springs to mind straight away.

I did at the time take them on what they said. But never mind, in a weird way they actually helped me lol all tho I won't lie, I was gutted at the time. Onwards and upwards as they say and there loss I suppose.

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