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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It reads funny, like you have copied and pasted from elsewhere and just lumped it all in together, and not used spaces to separate any of the sentences
It's hard work |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Grammar and punctuation still need a little work.
Personally, I would take out the bit about being educated. Think about it. What are you trying to say. After all, we're all 'educated'. The question is, to what level.
And, to be fair, if you're going to use that as a 'selling point' your grammar, spelling and punctuation need to be flawless.
Read the whole thing through a few times. Line by line even. Think about what each part says and whether or not it's really necessary.
For example, on the one hand, you may feel it's necessary to state that you're only looking for women and couples - but that information is already available further down under the 'looking for' section - as are things like Anal, Oral, rimming etc.
I'm not suggesting that you lose them, but just consider the whole of your profile as a source of information to others, rather than each part separately.
Also, sentences that pretty much state the obvious and that could probably be applied to every profile on fab might not really be doing anything for you.
These are merely suggestions though. Feel free to use any or none of them, but I hope that I have encouraged you to take a more careful, closer look at your profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I may regret this but think I want to change my profile a bit ideas welcome. "
As you have had at least 22 meetings, I don't feel the need to give you any advice. |
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