FabSwingers.com > Forums > Introductions > Hello and Goodbye
Hello and Goodbye
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
[Removed by poster at 08/03/13 20:21:24] |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
[Removed by poster at 08/03/13 20:23:58] |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Hello to all the genuine fab swingers
Just thought I would introduce us both, we are Nikki & Stuart (real names) a very keen but still relatively new to the scene with some past experience. Seeking some fun people to socialize with, maybe leading to some sexy liaisons, who knows?
Also I’m after a little bit of constructive criticism regarding our profile as we’ve had no offers for our MFF or FF encounter, just deleted messages. I am not totally ignorant to why; as I’ve changed our approach a few times even uplifted our profile. I understand its early days but surely it shouldn’t take years to get somewhere?
Anyway rather than let both of us wait around I suggested I take a back seat “again” letting Nikki go off with other couples to explore her same sex curiosity and have some male fun too. My only concern is the couples don’t want me around and no suggestion the favor would be returned either? Nikki even suggested after her fun we hire someone just so I have my fun but I’m not keen and feel it won’t be the same for me as it was for her? So do I have a point or should I leave her to it now as she’s become very inconsiderate of late, of which she has admitted to?
Anyway rant over, just after some brutally honest comments and trust me I couldn’t feel any worse for being left out?
All the best Stu’ |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
To me, mutual consent should be paramount for a couple as should mutual enjoyment and if one or either party is not enjoying it, it is time to step back and review your options before carrying on with the meets. |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Hello stu... You must be feeling pretty awful and guessing your confidence has been knocked for six!!
Swinging for us is a "joint adventure"
We are on here as a couple and will only play as a couple!
Perhaps you both need to step back and re think what you would like to get out of this adventure... It can be hard to find another couple where you both like them, and they like you! But they are out there!! So maybe look at your selection process...
It has to be fun for everyone  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hello to all the genuine fab swingers
Just thought I would introduce us both, we are Nikki & Stuart (real names) a very keen but still relatively new to the scene with some past experience. Seeking some fun people to socialize with, maybe leading to some sexy liaisons, who knows?
Also I’m after a little bit of constructive criticism regarding our profile as we’ve had no offers for our MFF or FF encounter, just deleted messages. I am not totally ignorant to why; as I’ve changed our approach a few times even uplifted our profile. I understand its early days but surely it shouldn’t take years to get somewhere?
Anyway rather than let both of us wait around I suggested I take a back seat “again” letting Nikki go off with other couples to explore her same sex curiosity and have some male fun too. My only concern is the couples don’t want me around and no suggestion the favor would be returned either? Nikki even suggested after her fun we hire someone just so I have my fun but I’m not keen and feel it won’t be the same for me as it was for her? So do I have a point or should I leave her to it now as she’s become very inconsiderate of late, of which she has admitted to?
Anyway rant over, just after some brutally honest comments and trust me I couldn’t feel any worse for being left out?
All the best Stu’"
A few things strike me, firstly why not just look for couples? Secondly have you been on here before, becuase this post reads of someone jaded by months of setbacks not just 7 days? Which brings me to the last and by most important point - it is clear that you are far from happy with this set up, so why on earth are you continuing? This should be about both of you having fun but that appears to be far from the case. |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have just re read your profile... And sorry if this offends but it does seem a little one sided! It reads as if all this is for the female half? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Yeah understood, I have changed it a few times and did kinda write myself out of it intentionally this time to just maybe to attract a woman for her???  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By *lle adie 2Woman
over a year ago
newcastle upon tyne |
I dont do couples but from my point of view id say this is all wrong..
you seem more a cuck, than an equal partner
youre getting nothing out of it, and it should be a shared venture.
ur partner is being very selfish so in future only do meets that means youre going to get enjoyment.
what would she say if you got all pleasure and she got nothing.
SORRY RANT OVER |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I dont do couples but from my point of view id say this is all wrong..
you seem more a cuck, than an equal partner
youre getting nothing out of it, and it should be a shared venture.
ur partner is being very selfish so in future only do meets that means youre going to get enjoyment.
what would she say if you got all pleasure and she got nothing.
SORRY RANT OVER"
Thanks for your input, she does want for us both to have fun together but makes no effort to steer it in my favor? Please don't get me wrong I am very supportive and certainly don't dish any ultimatums, it just doesn't pan out for me in the end? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I dont do couples but from my point of view id say this is all wrong..
you seem more a cuck, than an equal partner
youre getting nothing out of it, and it should be a shared venture.
ur partner is being very selfish so in future only do meets that means youre going to get enjoyment.
what would she say if you got all pleasure and she got nothing.
SORRY RANT OVER
Thanks for your input, she does want for us both to have fun together but makes no effort to steer it in my favor? Please don't get me wrong I am very supportive and certainly don't dish any ultimatums, it just doesn't pan out for me in the end?"
Then why are you still going ahead with meets?
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
i think sadly this can be the case for many swinging couples..the women are always more popular and will get more opportunities to meet.
i meet couples but ones who seem really happy together and where the profile sounds happy and lighthearted.to me when i read yours it seemed like its all very serious and difficult..its supposed to be a bit of fun. |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By *lle adie 2Woman
over a year ago
newcastle upon tyne |
i totally agree with you - not a happy bunny at all. This should be fun and a laugh for you BOTH |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I dont do couples but from my point of view id say this is all wrong..
you seem more a cuck, than an equal partner
youre getting nothing out of it, and it should be a shared venture.
ur partner is being very selfish so in future only do meets that means youre going to get enjoyment.
what would she say if you got all pleasure and she got nothing.
SORRY RANT OVER
Thanks for your input, she does want for us both to have fun together but makes no effort to steer it in my favor? Please don't get me wrong I am very supportive and certainly don't dish any ultimatums, it just doesn't pan out for me in the end?
Then why are you still going ahead with meets?
"
We haven't in ages 4-5 years and that was a MMF but we've tried finding someone each year in that time and always got messed about and now nik is bi curious. So it needs sorting really  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
For you to be a successful swinging couple who stay together and enjoy the scene you need to come into it together with ideas of what you want to do which BOTH of you need to agree too.
The idea that there is some sort of cosmic karma in swinging is a laugh you have to understand that while there are indeed quite decent people out there if you give some people an inch they will run several miles with it, ie your Mrs being invited in with couples and you not, don't feel like your holding her back this is after all a journey for both of you and trust me the "wheel" wont come back round for you by letting her go off by herself.
Set out what you want to do specifically and stick to that if thats a MMFF or MFF then thats what you're after and stick to your guns on it, it will take you more time but there seems little point in being miserable just for the sake of one of you having "some" fun.
However, without being too judgmental as I don't know you or your situation at all the way you have painted your other half on this thread she, erm, doesn't come across in the best light if shes just willing to leave you quite upset/left out of it and go off and do her own thing, I would respectfully suggest there might be larger issues in your relationship that might need addressing.
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I dont do couples but from my point of view id say this is all wrong..
you seem more a cuck, than an equal partner
youre getting nothing out of it, and it should be a shared venture.
ur partner is being very selfish so in future only do meets that means youre going to get enjoyment.
what would she say if you got all pleasure and she got nothing.
SORRY RANT OVER
Thanks for your input, she does want for us both to have fun together but makes no effort to steer it in my favor? Please don't get me wrong I am very supportive and certainly don't dish any ultimatums, it just doesn't pan out for me in the end?
Then why are you still going ahead with meets?
We haven't in ages 4-5 years and that was a MMF but we've tried finding someone each year in that time and always got messed about and now nik is bi curious. So it needs sorting really "
Oh right, it's just one of your posts made it sound like you were having meets and you weren't being included?
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For you to be a successful swinging couple who stay together and enjoy the scene you need to come into it together with ideas of what you want to do which BOTH of you need to agree too.
The idea that there is some sort of cosmic karma in swinging is a laugh you have to understand that while there are indeed quite decent people out there if you give some people an inch they will run several miles with it, ie your Mrs being invited in with couples and you not, don't feel like your holding her back this is after all a journey for both of you and trust me the "wheel" wont come back round for you by letting her go off by herself.
Set out what you want to do specifically and stick to that if thats a MMFF or MFF then thats what you're after and stick to your guns on it, it will take you more time but there seems little point in being miserable just for the sake of one of you having "some" fun.
However, without being too judgmental as I don't know you or your situation at all the way you have painted your other half on this thread she, erm, doesn't come across in the best light if shes just willing to leave you quite upset/left out of it and go off and do her own thing, I would respectfully suggest there might be larger issues in your relationship that might need addressing.
"
 Brilliant advice |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By *lle adie 2Woman
over a year ago
newcastle upon tyne |
sort it ASAP, because this isnt good |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for all the reply's so far but we are very happy together and closer than most. However' when we get messed about every single time apart from one time years ago its not an easy thing to swallow? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
"Thanks for all the reply's so far but we are very happy together and closer than most. However' when we get messed about every single time apart from one time years ago its not an easy thing to swallow?"
I would suggest you need to get smarter on your met criteria.
Make sure you seek verified couples out, ask for a webcam session early on. Book a social meet first (in a neutral venue) to make sure everyone is happy.
That being said, we have had our only real couple based success in clubs as being face to face with real people who are there after (largely) the same things as yourself already helps to overcome a lot of the bullshit you get with the internet, you also get to sound peoples personality's and body language in person.
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh right, it's just one of your posts made it sound like you were having meets and you weren't being included?
"
no worries, wont be involved, couples willing to have but no share in return  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for all the reply's so far but we are very happy together and closer than most. However' when we get messed about every single time apart from one time years ago its not an easy thing to swallow?
I would suggest you need to get smarter on your met criteria.
Make sure you seek verified couples out, ask for a webcam session early on. Book a social meet first (in a neutral venue) to make sure everyone is happy.
That being said, we have had our only real couple based success in clubs as being face to face with real people who are there after (largely) the same things as yourself already helps to overcome a lot of the bullshit you get with the internet, you also get to sound peoples personality's and body language in person.
"
Thanks for that, already considered this as I'm a fun chap and love meeting new people I'm even considered very interesting and nik loves socializing and luvs me showing her off. However' we are only free Sunday nights and local club doesn't open then? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
"
Thanks for that, already considered this as I'm a fun chap and love meeting new people I'm even considered very interesting and nik loves socializing and luvs me showing her off. However' we are only free Sunday nights and local club doesn't open then? "
You're in the midlands you are prime place for clubs, one or two of them will have sunday night events, get onto the clubs section and start looking.
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thanks for all the reply's so far but we are very happy together and closer than most. However' when we get messed about every single time apart from one time years ago its not an easy thing to swallow?"
you say your very happy together, but you also stated she has become very inconsiderate of late I take that with you, and if so how can you say your both happy together
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh right, it's just one of your posts made it sound like you were having meets and you weren't being included?
no worries, wont be involved, couples willing to have but no share in return "
Im sorry but there is no reason they should return with their fem coming to see you.
If a couple came to us and said "could our bi fem come and play with you both for the night?" we would probably jump at the chance-but we wouldn't return the "favour" because we don't really play alone. There is no obligation on the other couple to do something outside of their boundaries just because you feel it's a good way for your lady to experiment.
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
All these let downs and time wasters or no reply's, we felt we should take what we could??????? We've been trying this 4-5 years and nothing. So I can forgive her for getting carried away as we have been waiting a while and some fun is better than none right? So just I get overlooked and originally asked what could we do to resolve the issues with everybody else not so much each other?
Cheers Stu' |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Try a club would be the obvious choice |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"All these let downs and time wasters or no reply's, we felt we should take what we could??????? We've been trying this 4-5 years and nothing. So I can forgive her for getting carried away as we have been waiting a while and some fun is better than none right? So just I get overlooked and originally asked what could we do to resolve the issues with everybody else not so much each other?
Cheers Stu' "
Is this in the 4/5 years youve been trying to swing or just in the last 7 days?
|
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"All these let downs and time wasters or no reply's, we felt we should take what we could??????? We've been trying this 4-5 years and nothing. So I can forgive her for getting carried away as we have been waiting a while and some fun is better than none right? So just I get overlooked and originally asked what could we do to resolve the issues with everybody else not so much each other?
Cheers Stu' "
take what you could that's the sound if desperation, my opinion if I was you's would pack in and get you lives back on track |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for the comment, but not once have we asked that of anybody, so why do they ask us? So we slowly come to terms nobody wants to play unless its on their terms and this why I'm posting here. Asking for some tips to get what we both want  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Asked what of anybody ? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Asked what of anybody ? "
was replying Couple11 |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Asked what of anybody ?
was replying Couple11 "
have you tried a club ? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Asked what of anybody ?
was replying Couple11 "
Oh sorry-from your OP it looked like you were saying that you were disappointed because other couples wouldn't share their fems back with you, i must have read it wrong!  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm lost now not sure what this thread is about now he seems to be talking in Riddles |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
my fault and apologize I asked and explained to many things at once?
sorry peeps |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Thanks for all the input folks, all noted and I will now consider the topic closed, but please feel free to drop us a message if you have any tips, Thanks Again Stu |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By *lle adie 2Woman
over a year ago
newcastle upon tyne |
ever heard the saying - the lady doth (or in this case guy)protest to much me thinks - no use making excuses and back tracking..sorry  |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
not making excuses and back tracking on what exactly? i was trying to reply to everybody not just your good self? I thanked everyone several post ago and assumed it would end there? |
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
