FabSwingers.com > Forums > Games > Doris & Ethel's Adventures #15
Doris & Ethel's Adventures #15
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Continuing the never ending story of Doris and Ethel and Dave  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We join our heroes in prison in Calcutta where they'd been arrested for |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
And hiding little Hedgehogs |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Yes Ace I know it's a sentence said Ethel  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But the hedgehogs ate all the Quavers so our heroes had nothing to eat. Dave said why don't we |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Do the can can and eat tree's |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But there were only rubber trees in Calcutta so Doris decided to try nibbling |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But it was poisonous and she began to wobble and talk just like |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Mr blobbly all gobbly de gooky |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And developed yellow spots all over her |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Toes so she started dancing and was spotted by a Bollywood director you he said will be in my next epic movie called vandurbelli |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So Doris, Ethel and Dave all had parts in the big movie production. Doris was the love interest and Ethel was cast as |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
The sister in law with the big teeth |
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With a voice to match the teeth of Janet street porter |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And eyes like Ava Gardner. Dave got a small role as a travelling |
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Road worker who did the wiring for the cats eyes |
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but he had forgotten his boots, so Doris offered to.... |
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Clip his long talon toe nails so his replacement boots from |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
New York were nice and comfy |
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Once he takes the bid apple out of the left one and |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Once he takes the bid apple out of the left one and "
What bid |
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"Once he takes the bid apple out of the left one and
What bid"
big* |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Then Gemma appeared dressed as a pony |
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Hoping not to chat to someone who could give a paracetamol a headache so she decided to head for a wheelie bin for |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Some rest but wanted a bed |
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But found half a box of alpen in there and needed some milk to |
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They spotted a cow in a field and decided to get the milk from the cow and pour on to their Alpen.
All of a sudden they realised there was a bull in the field.
Yikes said Ethel… |
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"Let's play tick"
The bull ran to hide , refusing to go 'on' and no one would argue with him ......... so ........ |
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Jim Bowen miraculously appeared out of nowhere and said..... |
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"Jim Bowen miraculously appeared out of nowhere and said....."
You don't get anything for three in a bed........ |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
So let's play darts |
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So they all went to the Frigid Inn just down the road, and guess who was serving..... |
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"So they all went to the Frigid Inn just down the road, and guess who was serving....."
It was Yasmeen the Feisty Farting Tart of Fab ......... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"So they all went to the Frigid Inn just down the road, and guess who was serving.....
It was Yasmeen the Feisty Farting Tart of Fab ........."
 it was I was wearing |
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"So they all went to the Frigid Inn just down the road, and guess who was serving.....
It was Yasmeen the Feisty Farting Tart of Fab .........
it was I was wearing "
A peep hole bra and gold lame undercrackers ........ with heels natch |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Then Christopher Biggins turned up holding his stomach and saying I've got diarrhoea I think iv eaten a... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
A rotten jalfrezi with extra chilli and Sambuca garam masala and spinach |
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Off he went to spew his guts up while Doris and Ethel pissed themselves laughing |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But Dave wasn't laughing because a raccoon had run off with his |
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new boots and the packet of.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Maltesers he kept down his pants for emergencies. Out of nowhere there was a flash of smoke and |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Bahuma appeared again holding |
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A sign that said…..you have three wishes then I’m off again |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
To watch the hockey |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With Edward Scissorhands and Gok Wan |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Who was wearing a shell suit made entirely of |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And balloons. The smell attracted bands of wild cats who burst the balloons and made Doris |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Become a cat called dolly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Parton who sang very loudly until Ethel threw a bucket of water over her and Dave |
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Picked up the cat and put her in the water.
Which turned her back into Doris. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Yes Said Ethel welcome back |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Except now Doris had an insatiable appetite for milk and |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Except now Doris had an insatiable appetite for milk and "
Beetroot |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Coloured leggings which she bought from |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
The shop near the vegetable patch
Called |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Give Peas a Chance |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Ahhh can we make pea surprise asked
Ethel |
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What’s the surprise?
Asked Ethel. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're going to surprise Dave by putting a packet of frozen peas up his |
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Arse.
That certainly will be a surprise. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
But then Lily turned up with a twinkle in her eye and a slide in hair the colour was blue |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And so was her language. What the f**k is going on in this thread she shouted. Well said Dave... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
It's all fun and games darling all fun and games |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Yes that's the face he made and I'll stuck with it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Yikes said Doris. What game shall we play then ? |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Yes that's the face he made and I'll stuck with it"
Was |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Yikes said Doris. What game shall we play then ?"
We can play cricket with
Ian botham |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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He's got a lovely moustache and balls made of leather. Well said Ethel, let's see if he wants to |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Become a model at he |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
The weather is nice here said... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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John Ketley so he took off his trousers and danced round the room like a wild |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Had eaten too many Haribos and too much |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Which made him strong enough to take Doris in his arms and |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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In Buenos Aires, so our heroes found themselves in Argentina ! The first thing they did was |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Sit down any lobster and crabs finished with champagne |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And rice pudding with jam for after. When they were finished Doris belched loudly and said |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Then they all sang Let's Go Round the fan |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But they stopped when the helicopter arrived to take them to the Falkland Islands where |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
They all ate seafood and devoured the local delicacy which was mushrooms and beef |
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We gonna pay for this said ethel
Wish I had brought spare knickers  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But fortunately there were lots of bushes on the Falkland 
Meanwhile a large army of penguins had gathered... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
From the batman film to take |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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On Doris and Ethel who had been cast as Batwoman and Robina in the new movie called |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Beware the penguins |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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In which a gang of evil Penguins tried to steal all the fish from Dave's |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
From Dave gut which was smelly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As it has been there since |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
1752 to the Year the smellies came out |
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Ethel and Doris had to go get measured up,for their costumes |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
We will wear the finest garments bring me the best dressmaker in the world they said |
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But unfortunately Zandra was on holiday and so they brought in Thora Fat Thumbs from the British sewing Bee and her sister Betty who had come last for sewing razor blades into the ribbons of bonnets for sale to women with beards.......
Hello there said ................... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Betty how do you like your dress |
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Short or long
With or without leather patches |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
We are royalty we want the best snap snap said Ethel
The dress maker saw red and said to
Ethel dont you dare snap your fingers at me and grabbed Ethel by the head and.. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Thora fat thumbs farted and said... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Off with your head ! Because I am the Queen of Diamonds and you are just |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
And you are just a naughty naughty of the world |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Championships of naughtiness which was held every year in |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Which the contestants reached by travelling on a giant |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Eagle with big eyes |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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When they arrived on Uranus the Eagle let them go and they landed safely. Surprisingly Uranus looked a lot like Swindon. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Then arrived Tilda Swinton riding on a horse |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Called Spangles McDrain which had just won the Derby. It had got to Uranus by using |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
The sea Rose to a high level then entered Julia Julia who was smitten with |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Clarissa the kisser who was born in |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
18th century She Wore a nice Basque and |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thong around her throat. Dave immediately fell in love with Clarissa because |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Her legs were amazing and |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
She said I Want ReVenge you should have it my beauty hahaha he he he she |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But Doris became very jealous and decided to steal Clarissa's |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Because without her codpiece she had no control over her |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And so she began to fart uncontrollably to the tune of |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
We are the cheeky girls |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And Doris and Ethel sang along as they felt so |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Liberated and delicious |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Like a pair of ripe plums. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Leoblooms gonads because his were blue and soggy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Leoblooms gonads because his were blue and soggy "
 |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Leoblooms gonads because his were blue and soggy
"
Like Ethels blue hair rinse |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So our heroes found themselves in Swindon which looked a lot like Uranus and decided to go ten pin bowling. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
And drink tea and eat scones |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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At the Marilyn Monroe tea rooms which were owned by |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Joan was a famous actress but also an amazing baker who was famous for her sour dough and |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Delicious spinach and cuddles |
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"Delicious spinach and cuddles "
Cuddles was her pet monkey which she kept on a golden leash and ...... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But Cuddles was exceptionally rude and liked to show his monkey bum to everyone who |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Liked to look the first to look was Granny crumpet |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And she was followed by Harold from Neighbours who fell madly in love with the monkey and took him away to |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
To America where they grew turnips and ate
Pineapples |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And lived happily ever after. Back in Swindon Doris had got a new job as a |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Lion tamer she tamed the king lion |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And made him carry her shopping home in a |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Tesco trolley on the way they met Joan Crawford who |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Now worked in Boots as a condom salesperson. She loved to |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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And expensive perfume, designer clothes and make a noise like a |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Eating cornflakes through a straw while using a food processor. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
And dancing with ida lupino |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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At the Swindon dance hall which was owned by old thread favourite |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Who like to sing
Purple rain and wat chicken soup
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Doris and Ethel were that tired so they tried to get some sleep in the local caravan which was owned by... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t remember Swindon being such a good night out, said Ethel. I’ve had a lovely time but I could do with a nightcap. Let’s get a hotel room together and we can… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doris and Ethel were that tired so they tried to get some sleep in the local caravan which was owned by..."
Oops I take too long to type  x |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Doris and Ethel were that tired so they tried to get some sleep in the local caravan which was owned by...
Oops I take too long to type x"
xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t remember Swindon being such a good night out, said Ethel. I’ve had a lovely time but I could do with a nightcap. Let’s get a hotel room together and we can…"
Party like it's 1999. Suddenly in a flash of purple smoke the ghost of Prince appeared and said... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Now then now then what's going on here let's be having you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Kiss ! He sang, so everyone started smooching but one thing led to another and the Manager knocked on the door because |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
Kenya Moore was stripping |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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All the wallpaper using a kettle and a carving knife. |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
So she applied paint |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
She painted her old Castle blue then applied red paint to her |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ear lobes and began to dance the cha cha cha with Len Goodman who had arrived by |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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But due to panic buying he'd run out of petrol in Reading and had to finish his journey on |
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