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No "Safe Sex" = Bareback?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I have been on here for a while but started couples profile with wife and we won't play with those that do play bb. Obviously it has been done to death about no bareback option in the interests section, but is it a safe assumption then that NOT having "Safe Sex" listed means that they do play that way????????

The only reason I mention it is that a couple I know had an issue where the guy they played with kept trying to slip the condom off. I want to protect my wife during play and this is going to have to be part of our vetting procedure.

I know some do have safe on their profile but don't, but trying to stop the majority. If someone tried it with my missus, it would get very messy. And not in the way the guy was wanting!

Ritchie

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We've not got safe sex ticked in our interests, and never have, doesn't mean we go bareback with everyone we meet, for us and thats just us, oral without condoms is not safe sex, why would anyone stick something in their mouth they wouldn't allow elsewhere? then call it safe, but thats another story, would be better having a check box for condoms for penetration? as im sure we're not the only couple who dont do oral with condoms, but at the end of the day its all about communication and if its a really big deal the safest way is not to swing full stop, as some people will say anything just to get a meet.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

yeah, it would just make more sense to have a bareback box, but as that won't happen, then it is just a wonder what others thought.

Maybe "oral without" should be added?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To be honest and when thinking about it, do we really think it would matter what check boxes we have on our profiles, because through experience, some people will only tick what they think others want to see, because theres more chance of a meet, on the other hand, at the first glance of a profile, the people who state clearly on there profiles that they like bareback are the only ones you can really trust to be telling the truth unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

that is true, but like I said, not really trying to start this old debate again, just trying to understand if that is what is generally meant, No "Safe Sex" =Bareback.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

condoms 4 penetration is defo a must and i aggree there shud be a check box 4 those lookin 4 fun but in reply to the other post condoms 4 oral becomes a moot subject where the women are bi and there are lots of em lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Understand that, but in sole answer to that question, would have to say that not having safe sex ticked doesn't mean bareback no, taking the what we deem safe out the equation, theres a large amount on here who only soft swing, and another large amount looking only for fem-fem based fun, so probably think they have no reason to take a safe sex box.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

that is why there is the "soft swing" option in my view.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"that is why there is the "soft swing" option in my view."

Totally agree with that, the problem is not everyone has the same view.

Our motto is, if in doubt, ask

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

well, thats 2 down, 2500+ to go!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We ticked the safe sex box AND put it in the main text of our profile so there is no confusion about it: Condoms - we provide them

People who do bareback - we love life too much to do this with anyone other than each other.

But still we get people asking if we do bareback!!

So now I always say we use condoms as early in the chats as I can that way I am not wasting anyones time if they dont agree!!

I would say that unless everyone put it on their profiles you cant always be sure what they will or wont do, and to be perfectly honest I dont think everyone will add their likes, dislikes and wants.

Shona

x x x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

i do look for it mentioned in profile text also Shona, its just that I also want my missus to do more of the finding of potential meets (she is still very shy and nervous) and it would help both of us to have a better understanding of this element of the site.

When I was on as a single guy I was big enough and ugly enough to look after myself!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As a bloke I tend to find that talking sorts this one out.

I'm not embarrassed or offended if someone says to me, during chat, on the phone or in person, "..hey we only use condoms when we swing".

Surely if you're going to get up close and personal the least you can do is be honest with each other and take a little time to find out about each other. I prefer it that way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

of course, but the main thing for me on here is

1. Not wasting my time and the people we are chatting with if that is what they want.

2. Protecting my wife from the situation mentioned in my OP about the guy trying to slip the condom off.

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By *thwalescplCouple  over a year ago

brecon


"

As a bloke I tend to find that talking sorts this one out.

I'm not embarrassed or offended if someone says to me, during chat, on the phone or in person, "..hey we only use condoms when we swing".

Surely if you're going to get up close and personal the least you can do is be honest with each other and take a little time to find out about each other. I prefer it that way."

Spot on. We find that we prefer to chat and make friends first, and nothing sets people more at ease than being honest, just slip it into the converstaion at the beginning and then everyone knows where they stand!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

we got turned down from a party cos we only do safe sex...

was gonna be around 10 couples, they said they all happily married and play with each other but DnD free...

doh, but they all having sex with each other so please explain the sense in that....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

god knows, and I personally know that at parties you can use a LOT of condoms, particularly if there is a lot of swapping going on. The best bet it if everyone brings them and sticks them in a bowl and you just help yourself.

We all know condoms are a pain, but so is burning when you pee, so i know what I would prefer! And whilst I have had regular partners I have trusted and played BB with, casual is very different, and 10 couples is very risky!

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