FabSwingers.com > Forums > Fabswingers.com site feedback > Looking to meet this week
Looking to meet this week
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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At the moment Fab only has a "looking to meet today" option. This only appeals to a niche who are either able to do or interested in last-minute meets.
* I propose the addition of the facility to let others know you're actively "looking to meet this week" if not fortnight and month options as well.
These additional options will use the same architecture as "meet today" and so be extremely easy to implement.
They will also help the vast majority of users who need some time to organise a meet and, so, for whom the "meet today" facility fails.
What's more, if fortnight or month options were added, users could effectively search for people near them who are actively swinging rather than either just thinking about it or taking a break, thereby potentially cutting down radically on the amount of interactions that go nowhere (what some call timewasters but are just, in fact, people who are only on Fab browsing for whatever reason)
I think this is a very simple, highly flexible, optional feature that would massively benefit all users, regardless of how they use the site. But admin are unlikely to want to implement it if there isn't wide support for it. So please stick your thumbs up here.
Please try to keep criticism constructive as this feature may benefit the majority of users including yourself. If the idea genuinely does have flaws please present them logically and show how they would negatively impact the site. I'm sure I and others would be happy to concede if you can show it wrong. Please don't portray me as some mad bad lone maverick selfishly and arrogantly tinkering with a perfect machine so as to force everyone to work in my way. I'm not. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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I don't see how it would benefit me - I meet people because I want to meet them (and we organise our diaries very successfully - not one no show) not because I have a bit free time on my hands.
I think if this was introduced to the site and I posted I had free time in 'x', people could get quite rude when that doesn't happen to fit them in. As a single woman who has been on here for almost five years, I don't think I want the potential for added grief. |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
i put up specific meets well before the day, for group socials, they're on my page in advance then and on the homepage the day i set them for also.
i think this works well enough, and you could add to that meets subject box that you're free all week or whenever, and add additional meets for every day you're wanting to meet. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi Meli. Thanks for keeping your critique focused.
"I don't see how it would benefit me - I meet people because I want to meet them (and we organise our diaries very successfully - not one no show) not because I have a bit free time on my hands"
Do you never have any discussions with people about meeting that don't come to anything as it emerges they're not really that motivated to really meet? This would help reduce these discussions. Also the feature isn't really an indicator of free time. Like the "meet today" it merely indicates a level of seriousness. You are genuinely looking to meet within the next few days otherwise weeks and not just browsing
"I think if this was introduced to the site and I posted I had free time in 'x', people could get quite rude when that doesn't happen to fit them in. As a single woman who has been on here for almost five years, I don't think I want the potential for added grief."
One could make the exact same argument for the current "meet today" feature. "You said you'd meet today! Why didn't you meet me?". Do people have problems with that happening? If so it doesn't appear to be a major gripe, unlike conversations that lead nowhere which are frequently complained about.
I hope I've answered all your concerns. I certainly don't think they're enough to show the idea is either mistaken or would be detrimental to the majority of users  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i put up specific meets well before the day, for group socials, they're on my page in advance then and on the homepage the day i set them for also.
i think this works well enough, and you could add to that meets subject box that you're free all week or whenever, and add additional meets for every day you're wanting to meet."
You're right this is an option, a very clunky option. Let's say we have Wednesday through Friday available this week and next. Are we expected to post 6 events in the event section for each day? The maximum number of events you can post is 5. Let's suppose we're interested in a couple who are available Monday through Wednesday on both weeks. Are they supposed to have also posted 6 events? And what if one of us fails to post the Wednesday meet we can actually both make? As you can see this approach is a bit of a clunky fudge.
Now imagine you just added a "meet this week" flag, as one does with "meet today" and the other couple did the same. You spot you're both looking to meet. You say hi, here's my face pics, when are you available this week? And next thing you know a meet has been arranged. Much simpler and more flexible don't you think |
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By *orum TrollWoman
over a year ago
•+• Access Denied •+• |
"i put up specific meets well before the day, for group socials, they're on my page in advance then and on the homepage the day i set them for also.
i think this works well enough, and you could add to that meets subject box that you're free all week or whenever, and add additional meets for every day you're wanting to meet.
You're right this is an option, a very clunky option. Let's say we have Wednesday through Friday available this week and next. Are we expected to post 6 events in the event section for each day? The maximum number of events you can post is 5. Let's suppose we're interested in a couple who are available Monday through Wednesday on both weeks. Are they supposed to have also posted 6 events? And what if one of us fails to post the Wednesday meet we can actually both make? As you can see this approach is a bit of a clunky fudge.
Now imagine you just added a "meet this week" flag, as one does with "meet today" and the other couple did the same. You spot you're both looking to meet. You say hi, here's my face pics, when are you available this week? And next thing you know a meet has been arranged. Much simpler and more flexible don't you think "
i use my status for sex meets, this works better than the meet today thing always.
if your meet today thing says you can meet all week people will see that. you can put whatever you want in the headline also, i do.
i'm not knocking your idea really, i just think you can use the site tools however you want so they fit what you want to do on this site. others will see and twig on they can do similar. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i use my status for sex meets, this works better than the meet today thing always.
if your meet today thing says you can meet all week people will see that. you can put whatever you want in the headline also, i do."
Another good response. But again flawed. Firstly you'd need the other couple to have posted a similar status, when many don't use status updates in that way and, indeed, many appear not to use their status at all. But the bigger flaw is you can't filter searches by peoples status. A simple flag "I'm looking to meet this week" doesn't involve having to think up something witty to write, doesn't mess with your status message which might be saying any number of things, and is searchable
"i'm not knocking your idea really, i just think you can use the site tools however you want so they fit what you want to do on this site. others will see and twig on they can do similar."
I understand. I'm just trying to show that this idea adds to the site, not detracts, and what it facilitates will be useful to most people and is not really currently doable using the features Fab supplies (unless via the clunky ineffective methods so far described) |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"Hi Meli. Thanks for keeping your critique focused.
Do you never have any discussions with people about meeting that don't come to anything as it emerges they're not really that motivated to really meet? This would help reduce these discussions. Also the feature isn't really an indicator of free time. Like the "meet today" it merely indicates a level of seriousness. You are genuinely looking to meet within the next few days otherwise weeks and not just browsing.
One could make the exact same argument for the current "meet today" feature. "You said you'd meet today! Why didn't you meet me?". Do people have problems with that happening? If so it doesn't appear to be a major gripe, unlike conversations that lead nowhere which are frequently complained about.
I hope I've answered all your concerns. I certainly don't think they're enough to show the idea is either mistaken or would be detrimental to the majority of users "
No, I don't. I have discussions that don't lead anywhere because one or both are not that interested in meeting the other - it's not down to them not being serious about meeting. The system won't help to reduce those discussions.
I also don't think that because someone posts a meet request saying they are looking to meet within the month it indicates they are more serious about meeting - it means they can click a button to say they would consider it if everything is aligned.
My latter point ties in with the point you were making about it showing you are serious about meeting. As it stands, I don't post a meet today thing. If your system was to be implemented, the belief will be that unless you post that you're looking to meet within a time frame, you're not serious, creating a pressure to do so and thus the potential for negativity I didn't clarify well enough in my previous post.
I can understand it's an idea you're keen on but I still don't see how it would be particularly beneficial to the majority of users or add anything to the site - 'timewasters' can still abuse it, people can still post threads bemoaning it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My latter point ties in with the point you were making about it showing you are serious about meeting. As it stands, I don't post a meet today thing. If your system was to be implemented, the belief will be that unless you post that you're looking to meet within a time frame, you're not serious, creating a pressure to do so and thus the potential for negativity I didn't clarify well enough in my previous post.
I can understand it's an idea you're keen on but I still don't see how it would be particularly beneficial to the majority of users or add anything to the site - 'timewasters' can still abuse it, people can still post threads bemoaning it. "
Do 'timewasters' abuse the "meet today" function? If not then why would they abuse this one? You can't see the benefit to the large group of people who can't do last minute meets to have more of a realistic "meet this week" facility? I think most reading this will see it's really a bit of a no brainer. Easy to implement and immediately useful to a large swathe of users.
As for it being abused as you suggest or creating a culture where everyone needs to have it on or else no-one will talk to them... As a web developer myself I genuinely understand this type of thinking that needs to go on before any new feature is introduced into a product. By limiting the options to "today" "this week" and "this fortnight" it makes sure the tool will only really be used by those who are genuinely seeking new meets fairly imminently and so wouldn't be seen as a flag everyone needs to add just to be taken seriously. As a result, not everyone will use it... which is actually a good thing as it will mean a search of "who's looking to meet this week" won't be completely reliable. But I believe, as it settles in, it will end up becoming a much loved feature, helping users separate those who are unlikely to meet from those who are. Of course, as you say, face pics will always play the biggest role. But don't tell me you've never chatted to someone you thought were ok looking, possible meet material, but didn't pursue it very much because you were a bit Fabbed out.
Everyone goes through cycles with their swinging and those who catch them when they're down end up thinking they're 'timewasting' when in reality Fab is just missing an indicator that they're not really all that proactive at that point. This feature would go a long way to resolving all that |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"Do 'timewasters' abuse the "meet today" function? If not then why would they abuse this one? I think most reading this will see it's really a bit of a no brainer. Easy to implement and immediately useful to a large swathe of users.
But I believe, as it settles in, it will end up becoming a much loved feature, helping users separate those who are unlikely to meet from those who are. Of course, as you say, face pics will always play the biggest role. But don't tell me you've never chatted to someone you thought were ok looking, possible meet material, but didn't pursue it very much because you were a bit Fabbed out.
Everyone goes through cycles with their swinging and those who catch them when they're down end up thinking they're 'timewasting' when in reality Fab is just missing an indicator that they're not really all that proactive at that point. This feature would go a long way to resolving all that "
I think offering a different approach to looking at something is quite important in the forums but I guess not when it's another's idea. If the idea was a no brainer, it would be in the stages of being set up as we type.
I meant 'abuse' as in chat and indicate an interest with meeting with no real desire to do so - as in the 'abuse' this system was meant to help solve.
I've not mentioned face pictures once, tad confused about that. Nor have I been a bit 'fabbed out' and turned someone down as a result of it. If I am feeling that way my profile is hidden or it says not meeting.
I can understand your general idea but I am not sure it is necessary. |
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By *rx1Couple
over a year ago
North Devon-ish |
We think it would work.
Yes we understand people can put something on for a particular date, but unless someone actually comes across your profile and scrolls down, it usually gets missed.
Some change their status to looking for a meet on XXXX
Some even put a 'meet today' symbol up to attract attention only to highlight the Fact it isnt really a meet 'today' but tomorrow.
If when you add a meet for say in 3 days time it added a symbol at the top of your profile in say a different colour (to the red one) it might work...Worth a try anyway |
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Admin...We think the op original idea is great, if the servers wont stretch, how about a flag for "wanting to meet soon" , as some who use the site have no intention of meeting for whatever reason..  |
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"At the moment Fab only has a "looking to meet today" option. This only appeals to a niche who are either able to do or interested in last-minute meets.
* I propose the addition of the facility to let others know you're actively "looking to meet this week" if not fortnight and month options as well.
These additional options will use the same architecture as "meet today" and so be extremely easy to implement.
They will also help the vast majority of users who need some time to organise a meet and, so, for whom the "meet today" facility fails.
What's more, if fortnight or month options were added, users could effectively search for people near them who are actively swinging rather than either just thinking about it or taking a break, thereby potentially cutting down radically on the amount of interactions that go nowhere (what some call timewasters but are just, in fact, people who are only on Fab browsing for whatever reason)
I think this is a very simple, highly flexible, optional feature that would massively benefit all users, regardless of how they use the site. But admin are unlikely to want to implement it if there isn't wide support for it. So please stick your thumbs up here.
Please try to keep criticism constructive as this feature may benefit the majority of users including yourself. If the idea genuinely does have flaws please present them logically and show how they would negatively impact the site. I'm sure I and others would be happy to concede if you can show it wrong. Please don't portray me as some mad bad lone maverick selfishly and arrogantly tinkering with a perfect machine so as to force everyone to work in my way. I'm not. "
I thought you could put meets up for instance if your in Spain in 2 weeks? sure I've seen this? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As others have noted on this thread. Fab is well suited to people who aren't looking to meet anyone (what the site is for), people who are free and able to meet at short notice (meet today), and people who know they've got an evening free on the 29th of May (events).
What it lacks is a way to let others know you're interested in meeting sometime this week, sometime next week, or sometime this month. This feature has a vagueness that helps the majority of us swingers who are flexible about when to meet but perhaps need a little notice to prepare for it.
If you put up that you're interested in meeting next week and you spot others with similar notices you can start a conversation with them about when they're free. The side effect of this is it also gives you a better feel for who's active at the moment and who isn't, thereby helping you cut down on interactions with those who you aren't active at the moment and would therefore be wasting your time. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So you want a meet to say we may want a meet sometime this week? I suppose you could write that on the meet itself  "
We want to be able to say we're interested in meeting new people sometime this week but are flexible about when and we want to easily and quickly see who else is similarly available and not just hope one or two have misused the events section to try and convey that message.
The minute you stop trying to think of why Fab shouldn't have it, or what weird work around one or two people might do instead, you realise it's just a really basic simple to use tool that would help everyone see clearly who is actually looking to meet for a social or to swing at the moment and who isn't. |
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