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Enforcing the rules and making it a nicer safer place

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By *reyw01f OP   Man  over a year ago

Hamilton

I have been troubled for some time. With friends who get nasty mail. Reporting is of little effect. As these come from made up. Accounts deleted after the mail is sent. So no action can be taken. . As I work in IT. To me the solution is simple.

All logged on users have the IP address captured during that session. This is stored against the private email of the user

All mail from users captures the IP ( this is not sent with the mail but held on the server copy )

If an incident is flaged as abuse. The email IP is crossrefranced on the user session IP list. To find the the real account.

No of course I know IP is dynamic these days and does change. However only on a new internet session from the users home. Not a. Site log off and on within the same total time on line.

If any admin wish to speak to me regarding the more technical aspects. Please feel free. . I know some members have already had such bad experiences they have closed accounts and left

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By *at69driveMan  over a year ago

Hertford


"I have been troubled for some time. With friends who get nasty mail. Reporting is of little effect. As these come from made up. Accounts deleted after the mail is sent. So no action can be taken. . As I work in IT. To me the solution is simple.

All logged on users have the IP address captured during that session. This is stored against the private email of the user

All mail from users captures the IP ( this is not sent with the mail but held on the server copy )

If an incident is flaged as abuse. The email IP is crossrefranced on the user session IP list. To find the the real account.

No of course I know IP is dynamic these days and does change. However only on a new internet session from the users home. Not a. Site log off and on within the same total time on line.

If any admin wish to speak to me regarding the more technical aspects. Please feel free. . I know some members have already had such bad experiences they have closed accounts and left "

. Why should people worry about nasty email ? This is cyberland and not the real world . In any event a nasty email is a reflection on the author , not the recipient

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't understand why you're "troubling" yourself with other people's experience nor why you're party to their messages from other people...

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By *ome Social With UsCouple (FF)  over a year ago

East Midlands


"I have been troubled for some time. With friends who get nasty mail. Reporting is of little effect. As these come from made up. Accounts deleted after the mail is sent. So no action can be taken. . As I work in IT. To me the solution is simple.

All logged on users have the IP address captured during that session. This is stored against the private email of the user

All mail from users captures the IP ( this is not sent with the mail but held on the server copy )

If an incident is flaged as abuse. The email IP is crossrefranced on the user session IP list. To find the the real account.

No of course I know IP is dynamic these days and does change. However only on a new internet session from the users home. Not a. Site log off and on within the same total time on line.

If any admin wish to speak to me regarding the more technical aspects. Please feel free. . I know some members have already had such bad experiences they have closed accounts and left "

And that person could be resetting IP or using a mobile on phone network for fake account and main Internet for normal account

So how does one trace then

Jeeze, people just need to report, block and forget instead getting knickers in a knot from some random troller they never likely to meet

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I realise the OP is trying to pass on his IT knowledge but I do find it a strange and patronising post.

I am surprised the site owners can run a site like this with no IT knowledge. I suspect they aren't sitting in their living room with a zx spectrum and in between playing pacman and doom dabble in running a website.

I bet I get more abusive mail and I worry about it for a nanosecond before breaking out in uncontrollable laughter at the pettiness of it all. I have been threatened physically and had my statuses stalked saying that when I went to a certain club they would be waiting outside etc.

Yes it is a problem and, as far as I can see, it is dealt with as appropriately as it can be but the haters will always hate the key is taking your thumb, placing it under your nose and flicking it generally in their direction...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If they've deleted profile after sending email and before they've been reported then isn't that job done already.

Can't understand why people get so attached to messages off people they haven't and probably won't ever meet

If I get insulting nasty messages I block report and then move on and sometimes make a jokey reference to it on my status too

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By *reyw01f OP   Man  over a year ago

Hamilton

Indeed. I see your comments thank-you all

Yes the block report is the best option. However what I propose is also a deterrent. To make people think twice. Before doing it

And yes mobiles are hard to trace. However in most cases they will be on the same gateway when in the house. Due to Wi-Fi connection as most networks now ban this site and other adult content over GSM unless you ask for the restrictions to be lifted.

I am sure they have something a bit more powerful than a zx81 or a BBC micro

they already know when multiple chat windows are open I presume via a cookie or IP trace

Lastly yes this is VR cyberspace fantasy land what ever you wish to call it.

However. Behind the screens people are flesh and blood with feelings and emotions. Not all are keyboard warriors with rhino skin. I have had friends tell me of some if the mails they have received and find it disgusting that some behave in such a way because somebody said no .. hence this thread .

Thank-you

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By *at69driveMan  over a year ago

Hertford


"Indeed. I see your comments thank-you all

Yes the block report is the best option. However what I propose is also a deterrent. To make people think twice. Before doing it

And yes mobiles are hard to trace. However in most cases they will be on the same gateway when in the house. Due to Wi-Fi connection as most networks now ban this site and other adult content over GSM unless you ask for the restrictions to be lifted.

I am sure they have something a bit more powerful than a zx81 or a BBC micro

they already know when multiple chat windows are open I presume via a cookie or IP trace

Lastly yes this is VR cyberspace fantasy land what ever you wish to call it.

However. Behind the screens people are flesh and blood with feelings and emotions. Not all are keyboard warriors with rhino skin. I have had friends tell me of some if the mails they have received and find it disgusting that some behave in such a way because somebody said no .. hence this thread .

Thank-you "

. Surely it is up to the member to realize that they are in cyberland and that the emails received are meaningless .If someone is that sensitive about mail received , they should not be on a swingers site .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bigger and better things to worry about than a stroppy email on a 2bit sex site ....... and I'm sure Admin have more to do than trace IP addresses and block access knowing full well that the IP address is not static and that the account can be accessed from multiple devices using different access points all of which will have a different IP addy ...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

But how easy is it with someone with no tech knowledge to google how to mask their IP address and rejoin it's not exactly difficult

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"But how easy is it with someone with no tech knowledge to google how to mask their IP address and rejoin it's not exactly difficult "

Just switch your router off then on again and it'll be assigned a new IP addy

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

We should all be doing our bit to stop cyber bullying because that's what it is. Making it the recipients responsibility to adjust their attitude to abuse rather than the abusers responsibility to stop isn't the way forward in my opinion.

I've seen a lot of posts, mainly from women staying they have been upset by abusive and insulting mail.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


".

Not all are keyboard warriors with rhino skin. "

As this is referring to the recipients of messages, me probably included after my previous post, is this not a form of cyber-bullying? Name calling?

advocatus diaboli

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"We should all be doing our bit to stop cyber bullying because that's what it is. Making it the recipients responsibility to adjust their attitude to abuse rather than the abusers responsibility to stop isn't the way forward in my opinion.

I've seen a lot of posts, mainly from women staying they have been upset by abusive and insulting mail."

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By *isdirtygirlCouple  over a year ago

somewhere out there


"But how easy is it with someone with no tech knowledge to google how to mask their IP address and rejoin it's not exactly difficult

Just switch your router off then on again and it'll be assigned a new IP addy

"

Not always the case depending on your provider.

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By *onnie and JohnCouple  over a year ago

WILTSHIRE

Hi all, Hats off to the OP for trying to improve the site, and shame on the negative reply's. if you suffer cyber bullying block the user and report to admin as soon as possible ..connie x

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By *oretta DelamonteTV/TS  over a year ago

Birmingham


"Hi all, Hats off to the OP for trying to improve the site, and shame on the negative reply's. if you suffer cyber bullying block the user and report to admin as soon as possible ..connie x "

Its a waste of time reporting- I have reported totally illegal transphobic posts, and, whilst they are oblidged to remove them by law, they take no notice.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I agree whole heartedly with the OP, I have regularly subscribed to this and its partner site in the past, but after receiving messages containing veiled threats, and reporting those messages, only to find the user delete the profile and come back time and again with new ones, what was done about it? Nothing. I referred to the user in my own profile and got warned for it.

These messages had a major impact in my ability to trust somebody enough to actually meet them, so were psychologically damaging, yet nothing was done.

That's when I stopped subscribing, and I won't resubscribe until they take issues like this more seriously and implement a method of coping with them as per the OPs idea.

And for anyone who suggests a call to the police regarding the messages, they tell you to report it to the site owners.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

In times like this you need to

Blame it on the boogie!!!

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By *now white1000Woman  over a year ago

York


"

Its a waste of time reporting- I have reported totally illegal transphobic posts, and, whilst they are oblidged to remove them by law, they take no notice."

Exactly this, and when i went into detail about it, it was me who a Forum ban.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo


"

Its a waste of time reporting- I have reported totally illegal transphobic posts, and, whilst they are oblidged to remove them by law, they take no notice.

Exactly this, and when i went into detail about it, it was me who a Forum ban."

You can't blame Admin for you breaking rules.

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By *ugby 123Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Here is an explanation from Admin from another thread on how they deal with reports. As you can see they have a lot of things in place already.

******Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

--

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.******

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