Hi I went to eurekas last night and had an amazing time I had a few kisses with women but found I was hesitant to let my hands roam and wondered if this was ok my main worry was I didn't want to offended the person any feedback would be welcome thank you x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi I went to eurekas last night and had an amazing time I had a few kisses with women but found I was hesitant to let my hands roam and wondered if this was ok my main worry was I didn't want to offended the person any feedback would be welcome thank you x"
Awe what a gentleman
What was their body language like
I would have just done it or asked them if it was ok  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is nice to see a positive post about communication and consent in clubs.
I have found the easiest and simplest way to ask is to simple ask “May I ...” |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
I would suggest if you are kissing, then putting your hands on her waist or arm would be fine. Ask before you go for boobs or bum.
It's difficult to go on body language. It's better to be reserved , than to upset someone. |
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"I would suggest if you are kissing, then putting your hands on her waist or arm would be fine. Ask before you go for boobs or bum.
It's difficult to go on body language. It's better to be reserved , than to upset someone. "
This
I think it's a quandary many respectful people face in scene. To a certain extent gauging things correctly is a skill that gets better with practice. Sometimes especially for guys it's difficult because there is a pressure and expectance (Maybe a bit self induced, maybe a bit societal induced) that we assertive sexually. Very easy with a partner you know well. But far more difficult with a stranger. But caution, keeping watch for subtle indications and gentle escalation and repeated checking in with the other person is key. Sometime (although not always posible) having a chat and an understanding of do's and dont' s and indications can be useful. Even if its just establishing some red lines beforhand so you dont find out by mistake. And it really is easier with practice. |
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A difficult one when thinking about it beforehand but usually social cues are there to guide you, even sub consciously. Easier said than done but you could say to the other person that you are more than happy for them to explore you. Of course checking with the person always works and this can be done subtly. |
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