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single guys at clubs

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

So ive decided the best way to enjoy the swinging scene is too start going to clubs, What sort of welcome do single guys get at these events? and what advise would you give.

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By *ancguy85Man  over a year ago

Manchester

Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thanks for the friendly advice, And in the wrong forum as well

Ive always like the idea of the clubs so will be an interesting experience, Don't think i would be too bothered if i didn't have sex, i Do like the social side.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman  over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Hope you had a good night OP. X

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By *VK_RugbyCouple  over a year ago

Rugby


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!"

Sound advice

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Really depends on the guy. Be friendly and not creepy, you should be fine. You might not get to play, but it'll be a good experience.

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By *umpkinMan  over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!


"…………………………… not creepy ……………. "

….. unlike the old boy I saw at Chams one night who thought it was a good idea to get so close to one lady looking through the one-way mirror into the couples room she could have felt his breath on her bare shoulder! Needless to say she didn`t stay in that place long!

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"…………………………… not creepy …………….

….. unlike the old boy I saw at Chams one night who thought it was a good idea to get so close to one lady looking through the one-way mirror into the couples room she could have felt his breath on her bare shoulder! Needless to say she didn`t stay in that place long!"

Eww

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By *illing to please46Man  over a year ago

Nottingham

I’m thinking of trying Purple Mamba out for the first time but I’m very nervous about going on my own would prefer to go with a lady who could show me around

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By *hubaysiWoman  over a year ago

Leeds

Go along with NO expectation of having sex.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’m thinking of trying Purple Mamba out for the first time but I’m very nervous about going on my own would prefer to go with a lady who could show me around "

Add some more cock pic to your photo gallery (nowhere near enough lol). Keep your orientation as Straight even though you're looking to and have met Men (us ladies love genuine guys lol). You'll be fine

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By *otlovefun42Couple  over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!"

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge. "

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

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By *itty9899Man  over a year ago

Craggy Island


"So ive decided the best way to enjoy the swinging scene is too start going to clubs, What sort of welcome do single guys get at these events? and what advise would you give."

As long as you don't turn into one of the wanking zombies you should do fine

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Loads of threads on this. Some great advice on them all. It’s just like any other bar. If you sit in the corner alone and watching you’ll still be there an hour later. Don’t forget It might not be just you that’s apprehensive. Most of all don’t expect. And don’t succumb to the ‘wanking dead’ they give us all a bad name.

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By *ovelifelovefuntimesMan  over a year ago

Where ever I lay my hat

Clubs are a great way to have fun. Be normal, don't be parting the wanking conga brigade, chat to couples and not just the female half and don't expect everyone to drop to their knees for you. Enjiy and good luck.

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By *J coupleCouple  over a year ago

stone


"As long as you don't turn into one of the wanking zombies you should do fine"

This is important. I’ve never seen one of those zombies getting an invite to play.

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By *onny MCMan  over a year ago

Crawley

For your first time in a club, I'd look for one that's quite small, it's much easier to start a conversation when people are all concentrated together. Hot tubs are usually quite an easy place to start talking to people too.

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By *r.BlondeMan  over a year ago

Chester/Wirral


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene "

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy."

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

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By *r.BlondeMan  over a year ago

Chester/Wirral


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there "

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed.

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed. "

To be fair mate, you can’t let people think turning up at a swingers club, then 5 minutes of chat, and you’re off for a play, as it isn’t like that either

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By *r.BlondeMan  over a year ago

Chester/Wirral


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed.

To be fair mate, you can’t let people think turning up at a swingers club, then 5 minutes of chat, and you’re off for a play, as it isn’t like that either "

Yeah that isn't always the case obviously i'm just comparing the two.

It can happen though I've played with people an I didn't even know their name or alias

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed.

To be fair mate, you can’t let people think turning up at a swingers club, then 5 minutes of chat, and you’re off for a play, as it isn’t like that either

Yeah that isn't always the case obviously i'm just comparing the two.

It can happen though I've played with people an I didn't even know their name or alias "

You’ve certainly had more success on the club scene than I have, so fair play to you

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By *r.BlondeMan  over a year ago

Chester/Wirral


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed.

To be fair mate, you can’t let people think turning up at a swingers club, then 5 minutes of chat, and you’re off for a play, as it isn’t like that either

Yeah that isn't always the case obviously i'm just comparing the two.

It can happen though I've played with people an I didn't even know their name or alias

You’ve certainly had more success on the club scene than I have, so fair play to you "

If you don't ask, you don't get is a good mantra to go by.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thanks everyone for the great advice, luckily my zombie costume got lost but i wouldn't have worn it.

I'm Wanting the social side more than just sex so I'm sure I'll do just fine, especially if people are as friendly as you guys.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Me and my mrs are new to this lifestyle we are looking to go to a club for our birthdays which are in a cpl of weeks more than likely be purple mamba should we as a cpl go with the same advice given above ????

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Just go and treat it like a bar pal. Chill out, have a few drinks, smile and be nice to people. Say hello and strike up a convo with someone. Go for a wander around the club and see what’s going on. Best case scenario is that you’ll end up talking to someone that wants to invite you to play. Worst case (well not worst) is that you might not get to play yourself but you’ll have met some nice people and enjoyed a few drinks. Go with no expectation of getting laid and that you’re just going to test the waters and you’ll feel more relaxed and won’t be disappointed if you don’t get action. What it will do though is give you confidence to go back again! And if you do get laid then happy days!

Top advice.

What we would strongly emphasise is "talk to people" even if it's just a hello.

Some will welcome it, others won't, some will just have a polite chat and nothing else, but others will want to take it further.

If you do talk to people, in our experience, you will be in a refreshing minority and it really could give you an edge.

All good advice above, and to summarise; it’s just a pub, talk to anyone who is willing to talk to you, accept rejection gracefully (it WILL happen), enjoy the views (but don’t leer), DO NOT EXPECT SEX!

Also;

try a couple or three clubs, as they really are not all the same,

and;

look for busy party events where single guys are ACTIVELY encouraged.

Good luck fella, hope you enjoy the club scene

They're not like a pub/bar that is an absurd analogy.

In all 7 clubs I have visited, I have stood or sat in a bar area, having drinks and socialising just like in a vanilla pub/bar. In fact, at La Chambre, you can easily mistake the place as a ‘normal’ pub, walking in off the pavement as you do there. Overall, in my clubs experience, I’ve often found the places to be an anti-climax, building up an image in my head of what they will be like inside from their websites and glowing reviews, to then get inside and think; it’s just like a pub really. If first-timers visit with this in mind, they are less likely to be put off going, and more likely to be pleasantly surprised when they get there

Yeah I get what you're saying but the conversations and atmosphere are totally different. There is tension that needs to be broken for things to happen.

I've never spoke to a woman for 5 minutes in a pub/bar then played with them haha normally hours of groundwork. If first timers do that they will most likely be disappointed.

To be fair mate, you can’t let people think turning up at a swingers club, then 5 minutes of chat, and you’re off for a play, as it isn’t like that either

Yeah that isn't always the case obviously i'm just comparing the two.

It can happen though I've played with people an I didn't even know their name or alias

You’ve certainly had more success on the club scene than I have, so fair play to you

If you don't ask, you don't get is a good mantra to go by."

I have no plans in the near future to visit any more clubs as a single guy, but I’ll beat that in mind, thanks

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