FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Dos and don'ts in a club
Dos and don'ts in a club
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I have never been to a club but I'm looking to go to my first next week.
I understand the obvious ones like always be polite and no means no but can anybody give me some points on what to expect.
I don't want to end up looking like the sad weirdo in the corner hehe.
Thanks |
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Have a look online for the club’s standard of etiquette. Also, treat it as if you were going into a pub or a party - chat to people, get to know them & be yourself.
If it’s a party night with a forum event, mention on there it’s your first visit; people will usually look out for you & make you feel welcome. Tell the club when you arrive too, you will get a tour round & get a feel for the place.
You’ve got lots of choice in the NW, so make sure you pick an event that suits you whenever you go!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Read the club rules before and follow them. Don’t be a towel tosser: stand at the door wanking under your towel  Talk to people at the bar area; we find that these are the people we play with.
Enjoy |
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OP the mere facts that you are brave enough (lots arent) to attend a club without asking to accompany someone else is refreshing in itself.
That you have bothered to research before your first time is an example of the kind of guys we love to meet.
Attitude is so important and the clubs aren’t intimidating. Go along with a positive attitude and I’m sure you’ll win  |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
Best advise...chat to anyone. Not just the people you want to hook up with. Meeting others, being friendly and with a good personality is helpful. People may not want to play, but they might next time you visit, they could give you a verification, they could invite you to a party in the future. So mix and mingle.
Amazing the number of single guys who hover by a bed and want to join in, but never uttered a word to people earlier in the evening ! |
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By *ty31Man
over a year ago
NW London |
The hardest part is breaking the ice, you may find that a fair few people are regulars and it may feel a little cliquey to start with, especially as a single guy.
In my experience most people are friendly enough,especially if they know it's your first time. |
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Good ideas here. Just go to get an impression of the place and to learn, as well as chat with people.
Keep yourself comfortable and confident by relaxing and don't hsng around any particular place there other than the bar - the rest of the place, just wander around and observe how others are. People who loiter near to others, play areas etc become obvious and possibly uncomfortable, desperate etc. Keep it light and plan to focus on chatting, getting to know a few people - you can be upfront that you're not looking for anything other than socialise, so they don't feel pressured.
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"Get a neon club virgin badge there are quite a few ladies that love fresh meat 
Really? 
It's true why would we lie 
Must be a Southern clubs thing 
Care in the community "
How does one lose their club virgin badge? Is it after their first visit, or after their first play? |
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"Get a neon club virgin badge there are quite a few ladies that love fresh meat
Really?
It's true why would we lie
Must be a Southern clubs thing
Care in the community
How does one lose their club virgin badge? Is it after their first visit, or after their first play?"
After your first play!
Took me about half a dozen visits as I was very shy |
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"Get a neon club virgin badge there are quite a few ladies that love fresh meat
Really?
It's true why would we lie
Must be a Southern clubs thing
Care in the community
How does one lose their club virgin badge? Is it after their first visit, or after their first play?
After your first play!
Took me about half a dozen visits as I was very shy "
Would it still count if your first play was with your own partner, or would it have to be someone you met in the club? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tell the club you're a newbie. A decent club will give you a tour and fill you in on the etiquette.
So many clubs just show you the rooms, but good staff and hosts will fill you in on their rules and introduce you to regulars at the bar. It helps if you choose a quiet-ish evening for your first visit, a busy night may be a little overwhelming and staff may be busier.
As others have said, be yourself and chat to others, don't sit in a corner. Few people will approach you, unfortunately.
Don't follow people everywhere, wanking or otherwise.
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"Get a neon club virgin badge there are quite a few ladies that love fresh meat
Really?
It's true why would we lie
Must be a Southern clubs thing
Care in the community
How does one lose their club virgin badge? Is it after their first visit, or after their first play?
After your first play!
Took me about half a dozen visits as I was very shy
Would it still count if your first play was with your own partner, or would it have to be someone you met in the club? "
Entirely up to you what you want to count, if you don't have a partner it would have to be someone you meet. If a couple not into swapping but want to play in a Club then that's fine too. |
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As others have said, look friendly and approachable and go with no expectations. Try not to sit by yourself as that can close you off from others.
If you're going to approach people, try to do it in a neutral area like the bar or spa area. You'll have the automatic 'single guy in a club' taint thanks to the poor behaviour of others so you'll have so get beyond that in your approach.
If you chat to couples, talk to both halves, not just the woman. If you chat to single women, steer away from sex chat until you feel they're warming to you. Getting good social verifications from a club meet can be the key to getting play meets, so don't just focus on getting them into bed.
A lot of couples like to be watched so feel free so do so from the approved watching area. Again, look friendly and approachable as well as looking like you're enjoying what you're seeing. You might get an invite into the room (if it's a couples room) if you're not stood there furiously wanking with a grim look on your face.
Above all, just try and enjoy your first visit. Talk to as many people (male and female) as you can and tell them your fab name. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"As others have said, look friendly and approachable and go with no expectations. Try not to sit by yourself as that can close you off from others.
If you're going to approach people, try to do it in a neutral area like the bar or spa area. You'll have the automatic 'single guy in a club' taint thanks to the poor behaviour of others so you'll have so get beyond that in your approach.
If you chat to couples, talk to both halves, not just the woman. If you chat to single women, steer away from sex chat until you feel they're warming to you. Getting good social verifications from a club meet can be the key to getting play meets, so don't just focus on getting them into bed.
A lot of couples like to be watched so feel free so do so from the approved watching area. Again, look friendly and approachable as well as looking like you're enjoying what you're seeing. You might get an invite into the room (if it's a couples room) if you're not stood there furiously wanking with a grim look on your face.
Above all, just try and enjoy your first visit. Talk to as many people (male and female) as you can and tell them your fab name. "
+1  |
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Here's a few from us:
DO:
- Be well groomed and as gorgeous as you can possibly be
- Make eye contact, smile
- Talk to everyone, compliment
- Tell people your name and fab name
- Ask people you've enjoyed talking with what they're looking for, and if they'd be interested in playing
- Have condoms available in your size (and with you, not in a locker or your car!)
- Ask about boundaries and preferences before play commences. Kissing (if allowed) and cumming (where) are common contentious issues.
- Bring to the attention of the club any problems you see (behaviour if concerning, safety/cleanliness issues, etc.)
- Clean up after yourself. Condoms and tissues into bin, surfaces cleaned etc.
- Ask others if they'd like you to leave a verification on fab (most people do, but not all!)
- Leave an honest review for the club. If you had any problems, bring them up at the time rather than in your review.
DON'T
- Touch without asking (even if you've played before!)
- Hover over a playing couple or group
- Follow anyone round like a puppy
- Open or rattle at closed doors
- Get d*unk
- If you smoke, don't come back inside straight away bringing a cloud in with you, if you vape (and that's allowed inside) don't vape right next to others
- Talk politics, religion, work, funerals, illness, or any other subject likely to bring anyone down
- Complain (about your lack of action or the high cost to get in with no guarantees)
- Look bored
- Talk about outside stuff where people are playing
- Bad-mouth (the club, the hosts, other attendees, other people)
- Get your damned phone out at any point unless you want it ramming deep where it won't get a signal
|
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"
Here's a few from us:
DO:
- Be well groomed and as gorgeous as you can possibly be
- Make eye contact, smile
- Talk to everyone, compliment
- Tell people your name and fab name
- Ask people you've enjoyed talking with what they're looking for, and if they'd be interested in playing
- Have condoms available in your size (and with you, not in a locker or your car!)
- Ask about boundaries and preferences before play commences. Kissing (if allowed) and cumming (where) are common contentious issues.
- Bring to the attention of the club any problems you see (behaviour if concerning, safety/cleanliness issues, etc.)
- Clean up after yourself. Condoms and tissues into bin, surfaces cleaned etc.
- Ask others if they'd like you to leave a verification on fab (most people do, but not all!)
- Leave an honest review for the club. If you had any problems, bring them up at the time rather than in your review.
DON'T
- Touch without asking (even if you've played before!)
- Hover over a playing couple or group
- Follow anyone round like a puppy
- Open or rattle at closed doors
- Get d*unk
- If you smoke, don't come back inside straight away bringing a cloud in with you, if you vape (and that's allowed inside) don't vape right next to others
- Talk politics, religion, work, funerals, illness, or any other subject likely to bring anyone down
- Complain (about your lack of action or the high cost to get in with no guarantees)
- Look bored
- Talk about outside stuff where people are playing
- Bad-mouth (the club, the hosts, other attendees, other people)
- Get your damned phone out at any point unless you want it ramming deep where it won't get a signal
"
|
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Thanks for all the advice and I'm defo going to get a neon newbie badge
I'm just going to go, be myself and speak to as many people as I can and just see how the night pans out. If nothing else I will alteast get a veri from the night and meet some new people. |
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"Thanks for all the advice and I'm defo going to get a neon newbie badge
I'm just going to go, be myself and speak to as many people as I can and just see how the night pans out. If nothing else I will alteast get a veri from the night and meet some new people."
Bear in mind that the North West has lots of clubs to choose from, so once you’ve got over your newbie nerves, try some of the different clubs & different events too!! |
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"I have never been to a club but I'm looking to go to my first next week.
I understand the obvious ones like always be polite and no means no but can anybody give me some points on what to expect.
I don't want to end up looking like the sad weirdo in the corner hehe.
Thanks"
Where is it you're thinking of going? |
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By *ootleCouple
over a year ago
Romford, Essex |
Smile - try to make eye contact (but not in a weird way )
Talk to people and not just one half of a couple.
Be brave, make the first move but don't start off by talking about sex - talk normally.
Don't follow people around - if they want you they will let you know (normally)
Relax - if you appear over eager it can come across as desperate.
You have 2 ears and one mouth - use them in that proportion
Your personality is more important than your dick 
And remember the old cliché - you never get a second chance to make a first impression xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
How does one lose their club virgin badge? Is it after their first visit, or after their first play?"
Traditionally it is kept by the first person that plays with you.
Some people here have them hung on their walls I am told. |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"
Here's a few from us:
DO:
- Be well groomed and as gorgeous as you can possibly be
- Make eye contact, smile
- Talk to everyone, compliment
- Tell people your name and fab name
- Ask people you've enjoyed talking with what they're looking for, and if they'd be interested in playing
- Have condoms available in your size (and with you, not in a locker or your car!)
- Ask about boundaries and preferences before play commences. Kissing (if allowed) and cumming (where) are common contentious issues.
- Bring to the attention of the club any problems you see (behaviour if concerning, safety/cleanliness issues, etc.)
- Clean up after yourself. Condoms and tissues into bin, surfaces cleaned etc.
- Ask others if they'd like you to leave a verification on fab (most people do, but not all!)
- Leave an honest review for the club. If you had any problems, bring them up at the time rather than in your review.
DON'T
- Touch without asking (even if you've played before!)
- Hover over a playing couple or group
- Follow anyone round like a puppy
- Open or rattle at closed doors
- Get d*unk
- If you smoke, don't come back inside straight away bringing a cloud in with you, if you vape (and that's allowed inside) don't vape right next to others
- Talk politics, religion, work, funerals, illness, or any other subject likely to bring anyone down
- Complain (about your lack of action or the high cost to get in with no guarantees)
- Look bored
- Talk about outside stuff where people are playing
- Bad-mouth (the club, the hosts, other attendees, other people)
- Get your damned phone out at any point unless you want it ramming deep where it won't get a signal
"
My advice
Make sure you have condoms to hand
ask about boundaries - something I didn’t to my embarrassment 
Don’t drink to much
talk to everyone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
From a newbie point of view yesterday, don’t stand with your arms folded or hands on your hips staring, maybe it’s because most of them had just towels on as it was a daytime event but I felt a bit uncomfortable but funny at the same time.
Geeky x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have never been to a club but I'm looking to go to my first next week.
I understand the obvious ones like always be polite and no means no but can anybody give me some points on what to expect.
I don't want to end up looking like the sad weirdo in the corner hehe.
Thanks"
Don’t be one of them guys that walk around the play area playing with your dick it’s not appealing. Talk to people and be yourself. People don’t like the guys that don’t talk to anyone but then stand over them while there playing wanking there cock. |
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Great idea