FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Sex guaranteed in swinger's clubs
Sex guaranteed in swinger's clubs
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?"
They are told the rules when they join a club. |
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"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?
They are told the rules when they join a club."
Depends on the club |
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By *inglesCouple
over a year ago
Colchester |
Our rules are clearly stated on our website and we check new members have read them through before and on their first visit, we also confirm to members that there’s no pressure to play and no one should have any expectations when attending, including no expectations of playing with someone a second time if they happen to meet at the club again x |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"Our rules are clearly stated on our website and we check new members have read them through before and on their first visit, we also confirm to members that there’s no pressure to play and no one should have any expectations when attending, including no expectations of playing with someone a second time if they happen to meet at the club again x "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?
They are told the rules when they join a club.
Depends on the club"
It’s a poor club that doesn’t tell its members the rules! |
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By *ester!Man
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?
They are told the rules when they join a club.
Depends on the club
It’s a poor club that doesn’t tell its members the rules! "
I do newbie tours at the club I host in. It’s a detailed walk about the club explaining the facilities, club procedures and also how we expect guests to behave. We then answer any questions the guests have. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Our rules are clearly stated on our website and we check new members have read them through before and on their first visit, we also confirm to members that there’s no pressure to play and no one should have any expectations when attending, including no expectations of playing with someone a second time if they happen to meet at the club again x "
That's really good. |
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Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers |
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"Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I go regular to Pandora rules are on there website and for anyone new they are told what to expect and what not to do. Think for single guys especially go to clubs and treat it like going to the pub. Chat to couples and single ladies don’t ever just dress down and stalk round the playrooms. Just like Fab you can’t expect to send a cock picture and meet me now and get lucky. You put the work in chat in clubs and it will happen but never expect sex that’s the best advice. I’ve been plenty of times to Pandora had great nights and no sex but had such great laugh and chat with people got to interact tho |
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"Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers "
I agree, besides the fact that most are there to play, nothing's guaranteed. Just like going clubbing really lol see someone you like, you talk to them to see if y'all get on and hope it goes where you want it to go. Honestly speaking though, I've only been to 1 club, Chams. And for a first timer I did quite alright  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers "
Exactly- but who is 'educating' the newbies? People are always getting pissed off when they're getting touched without being asked or when people assume sex is guaranteed.
If they see swinger porn where everyone is just in a massive orgy then it looks like anyone can just join in. |
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"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?"
The one rule that's universal is 'no means no' After that respect each other. Follow these and you won't go far wrong.
Death is the only thing you can guarantee in life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No one should pre empt having sex when visiting a club, the core of swinging is the social lifestyle. If you don't immerse yourself in that you have little chance of moving from the bar.
As I have recently said, a club is just a pub with scantily clad people and rooms to have sex in. You're still just 'on the pull', just with a better chance because you're surrounded by like minded people. |
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"Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers
Exactly- but who is 'educating' the newbies? People are always getting pissed off when they're getting touched without being asked or when people assume sex is guaranteed.
If they see swinger porn where everyone is just in a massive orgy then it looks like anyone can just join in. "
It’s no secret that I run swinging parties and I always make sure that newbies know what is what and the etiquette of not just attending clubs but the swinging scene
I would have no qualms at all in asking someone to leave if they choose to ignore what everyone else takes on board
I am lucky tho and have to say never have any issues other than the odd few that become soppy d*unks Haha
Any club / event worth its salt tends to not have aggro because people don’t want to ruin their chances of a return visit |
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"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?"
You're from the North Pole? I'd guess anyone up there thinking that sex was guaranteed would quickly be frozen out  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Common misconception
Newbies often think a swingers club is like a Roman orgy
In fact it’s like any other club , although people are there to meet likeminded others it all comes down to attraction and instead of going home with someone at the end of the night there are areas to go have some fun
Always remember it’s a lifestyle choice which a club facilitates rather than a brothel that services the customers
Exactly- but who is 'educating' the newbies? People are always getting pissed off when they're getting touched without being asked or when people assume sex is guaranteed.
If they see swinger porn where everyone is just in a massive orgy then it looks like anyone can just join in.
It’s no secret that I run swinging parties and I always make sure that newbies know what is what and the etiquette of not just attending clubs but the swinging scene
I would have no qualms at all in asking someone to leave if they choose to ignore what everyone else takes on board
I am lucky tho and have to say never have any issues other than the odd few that become soppy d*unks Haha
Any club / event worth its salt tends to not have aggro because people don’t want to ruin their chances of a return visit "
It's good that you let the newbies know. 
There's too many posts where people say they've been touched at clubs without being asked first.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They would have to be incredibly naive/thick/ignorant or massively entitled to think that..... or maybe just typical of some of the single guys on here, going on what some have said. |
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We have been to one club where it felt like that.
We have never returned as it just doesn’t feel safe.
In fairness we stick to one club now and pick and choose who we do or don’t interact with and vice versa.
You should never expect sex, it’s a given not a taken. |
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look at all the current sex assault cases
grabbing a woman as some guys do in clubs could lead to a trip to court.
I had some serious words with a guy who put his hands on nikki in a club once. I made it very clear my thoughts. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"look at all the current sex assault cases
grabbing a woman as some guys do in clubs could lead to a trip to court.
I had some serious words with a guy who put his hands on nikki in a club once. I made it very clear my thoughts."
What did he say? Was he under the impression that it was a 'free for all'? Or did he look embarrassed like the club had told him the rules and he ignored them? |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Themed type of of nights probably not, depends on event gangbang type thing maybe yes."
Doesn't depend on these nights at all, people are still allowed to say no and sex is still not guaranteed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Been to a lot of clubs and apart from the ones in Holland they have all shown us around and gone over the rules, even though the first question is usually "Have you been to a club before" when we've told them we are new.
People on here complain about inappropriate touching as it is a written and spoken rule that is being broken, not an etiquette that may be ambiguous |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a single fem, I get it all the time with single men assuming I'm there as a free prostitute. I've been told 'but I'm horny' or that I'm a prick tease and that I should be having sex with anyone and everyone. It really grinds my gears.
I can't just pick a guy and go straight to a room. I need to chat, get to know them a little. I know it sounds daft, as it's just sex after all. I need a connection. My brain needs stimulating before anything else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a single fem, I get it all the time with single men assuming I'm there as a free prostitute. I've been told 'but I'm horny' or that I'm a prick tease and that I should be having sex with anyone and everyone. It really grinds my gears.
I can't just pick a guy and go straight to a room. I need to chat, get to know them a little. I know it sounds daft, as it's just sex after all. I need a connection. My brain needs stimulating before anything else."
Lots of the single guys just don’t get this! However, they are the ones loosing out. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"As a single fem, I get it all the time with single men assuming I'm there as a free prostitute. I've been told 'but I'm horny' or that I'm a prick tease and that I should be having sex with anyone and everyone. It really grinds my gears.
I can't just pick a guy and go straight to a room. I need to chat, get to know them a little. I know it sounds daft, as it's just sex after all. I need a connection. My brain needs stimulating before anything else."
exactly this |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
As a single guy I know the rules and don’t need to be told them as been in club scene for a number of years
If I am going to a club, I put an invite up and also have a look if any friends are going. Sex is not guaranteed but sex is more likely if someone you like is going |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The 80:20 rule seems to apply at clubs as it does to most things. 20% of the men get 80% of the action. They maybe in some instances more handsome, but it’s usually down to their superior approach. |
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We as a club have that on our profile and our web page that sex is not guaranteed. Its surprising how many newbie single guys think it is, in lots of our phone calls they always ask is sex guaranteed. We tell them no, we have probably put it too blunt on our website etc, and scared some guys off, but the guys that do pass and come along are all respectful. Hence the reason that on our nights we get so many single females coming along now. I have noticed over time though that even good looking guys dont get to play if they are not friendly. I have seen one guy who i thought didn't stand a chance, but He was so funny and good fun that he was whisked upstairs by 3 of our sexy single ladies and had the time of his life.So its not all about looks  |
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"The 80:20 rule seems to apply at clubs as it does to most things. 20% of the men get 80% of the action. They maybe in some instances more handsome, but it’s usually down to their superior approach. "
Yep, would agree with that 100%.
The right page we call it, if they are on it then its a maybe, if not then not a hope in hell. |
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By *andr1Couple
over a year ago
beverley |
We often visit clubs and always looking for fun with others. We understand how difficult it must be for single guys, but amazed how little effort is made to chat to us in the bar area. Guys when you do it increases your chances 10 fold. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We often visit clubs and always looking for fun with others. We understand how difficult it must be for single guys, but amazed how little effort is made to chat to us in the bar area. Guys when you do it increases your chances 10 fold."
Exactly this! |
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It can be quite off putting to hear some of the attitudes in clubs from single guys. Which to be honest is fine form my point of view because you know they’re not going to get anywhere with that kind of attitude. This is however a problem if its putting off people from going.
The problem as i see it is that there are some ‘clubs’ who appear to be almost guaranteeing sex buy charging £70 odd for single guys to get in. If those same guys then go to a ‘proper’ club that say charge £33 to get in they think they have got a bargain not that its a different type of place !
I hope that over time they get the message and stay out of proper clubs.
As long as guys accept that the prime reason to go is to socialise then there wouldn’t be a problem (perhaps a different 80:20 rule – you play 20% of the time).
There are also the guys who say nothing and wait for play on an open room then dive in hoping not to be noticed....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It can be quite off putting to hear some of the attitudes in clubs from single guys. Which to be honest is fine form my point of view because you know they’re not going to get anywhere with that kind of attitude. This is however a problem if its putting off people from going.
The problem as i see it is that there are some ‘clubs’ who appear to be almost guaranteeing sex buy charging £70 odd for single guys to get in. If those same guys then go to a ‘proper’ club that say charge £33 to get in they think they have got a bargain not that its a different type of place !
I hope that over time they get the message and stay out of proper clubs.
As long as guys accept that the prime reason to go is to socialise then there wouldn’t be a problem (perhaps a different 80:20 rule – you play 20% of the time).
There are also the guys who say nothing and wait for play on an open room then dive in hoping not to be noticed....
"
I absolutely agree with this. I think that charging men so much more can make them think they are due something for their money. There is no reason whatsoever for men to be charged more. They would still use the showers/ hot tub/ lockers etc the same as women or couples. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Absolutely not why would you think it was?"
Is that question to me? This is what my OP said:
"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?"
I know sex isn't guaranteed. My point was how would anyone new to the scene know what the rules are.
When I was new I didn't know if it was true or not.
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By *andDeeCouple
over a year ago
Ashford |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well  "
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself). |
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By *uicy72Woman
over a year ago
North Colchester |
"As a single fem, I get it all the time with single men assuming I'm there as a free prostitute. I've been told 'but I'm horny' or that I'm a prick tease and that I should be having sex with anyone and everyone. It really grinds my gears.
I can't just pick a guy and go straight to a room. I need to chat, get to know them a little. I know it sounds daft, as it's just sex after all. I need a connection. My brain needs stimulating before anything else."
Totally agree |
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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago
Best Greggs in Cheshire East |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself). "
Woah! She wasn't being nasty to me. You have misunderstood the situation. We do pie jokes. Look at my user name lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a single fem, I get it all the time with single men assuming I'm there as a free prostitute. I've been told 'but I'm horny' or that I'm a prick tease and that I should be having sex with anyone and everyone. It really grinds my gears.
I can't just pick a guy and go straight to a room. I need to chat, get to know them a little. I know it sounds daft, as it's just sex after all. I need a connection. My brain needs stimulating before anything else.
Totally agree "
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself). "
actually pieman and I are very good friends your comment was uncalled for as you don't understand the banter between us on the forums and via pm. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself).
Woah! She wasn't being nasty to me. You have misunderstood the situation. We do pie jokes. Look at my user name lol."
Cheers hun I think we should up the ante next time and offer cake for the next Gregg's challenge hehe xx  |
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By *andDeeCouple
over a year ago
Ashford |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself). actually pieman and I are very good friends your comment was uncalled for as you don't understand the banter between us on the forums and via pm. "
Apologies. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself). actually pieman and I are very good friends your comment was uncalled for as you don't understand the banter between us on the forums and via pm.
Apologies. "
no worries xx |
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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago
atlantisEVOLUTION Swingers Club. Stoke |
"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?"
As an owner I would say in general 'they don't'.
 |
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By *atEvolutionCouple
over a year ago
atlantisEVOLUTION Swingers Club. Stoke |
"Seems like lots of people think that going to a swinger's club means they are guaranteed sex. Is this true?
How do people going to clubs know what the rules are?
They are told the rules when they join a club."
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By *DFL6828Man
over a year ago
Leicester |
Depends on the club.. i went into a club a few years ago and within 30 mins i was having sex with 2 women... the next 3 or 4 times i went, didnt have anything but did watch a few people.. as people got to know me thins started to happen regular. Another club i have went to semi regular nothing has happend, thats just the way it is.. Im going to another new club tonight but as im going to be a new face there il have a chat with a few people but not expecting anything to happen as my intention is to network, if it hapens all good but if it dosent people will remember me..In a good way ofcourse |
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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago
Best Greggs in Cheshire East |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself).
Woah! She wasn't being nasty to me. You have misunderstood the situation. We do pie jokes. Look at my user name lol.Cheers hun I think we should up the ante next time and offer cake for the next Gregg's challenge hehe xx "
Oooo cake. That's not a bad shout. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Cool where do i sign up?
Ah
Right here...
Are there free pasties?
No and you ate all the pies as well
Is that quite necessary?!!
Unless the guy has been sending you messages and harassing you, that’s the sort of attitude females would be on the receiving end of by silly men who get nasty because they thought going to a club or chatting to someone on here meant they was in for a guaranteed shag before being turned down.
The fella was having a light hearted laugh (and maybe even at himself).
Woah! She wasn't being nasty to me. You have misunderstood the situation. We do pie jokes. Look at my user name lol.Cheers hun I think we should up the ante next time and offer cake for the next Gregg's challenge hehe xx
Oooo cake. That's not a bad shout."
Hmmm yes |
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