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Female accompaniment
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By *uwo OP Man
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
I would like to attend a club, but have female accompaniment rather than being a single guy looking like a lost fool. I haven't attended one before hence the nervousness and fear of complete embarassment.
I am wondering if there are there ladies out there in the same predicament or who specialise in this sort of 'friendship' to put one at ease.  |
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By *uwo OP Man
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
No, I don't mean an escort.
I'm talking about someone like myself who would like to attend a club, but would rather be accompanied with someone of the opposite sex.
In short - two newbies paired together for moral support. Helping each other to realise their fantasises. |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
The trouble with two newbies going to a club together, is that if you enter as a couple and if you don't hit it off, you are left in the awkward position of spending hours with that person. It's far better to chat to a few regulars who go to a particular club and then go in as a single man and mingle with them as a free agent. Clubs are not as scary as people imagine |
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Op, it's riddled with issues.
The lady newbie wants to go to meet new people as a single and fulfill her fantasises, not hold another newbies hand.
People are looking for guys with a semblence of confidence, not one who has a babysitter.
Time to put on the big boy pants and just do it. They are relaxed fun.
Sorry for the tough love btw. |
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"Leave him alone!
He's never been and is probably shy.
Let's offer support instead of saying grow a pair. Not everyone on here is confident.
"
You are right, at the same time lots of single girls have to make their first trip and that must be even more daunting.
A club is no different to a bar, apart from the extra, fun areas... |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"You've hit the nail on the head there. Not everyone has the necessary confidence at first both men and women.
I'd be as right as rain after I'd been there a while I'm sure."
That's exactly the case. You've just got to walk through the door on your own first. |
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"No, I don't mean an escort.
I'm talking about someone like myself who would like to attend a club, but would rather be accompanied with someone of the opposite sex.
In short - two newbies paired together for moral support. Helping each other to realise their fantasises."
'helping each other to realise their fantasies '
BOAK
What about going with an experienced guy who would have been through what you'd be going through and could pass on his knowledge to you? |
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OP; I’m off for my third club visit this coming Friday, by myself, to a club full of unknowns. My two previous club experiences were lack-lustre affairs, but it wasn’t down to the actual places, more the people in there at the time, and yes, some nervousness in my part. But the ‘fear factor’ has now gone for me, and it may take you two or three visits to settle in too. Just go, what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t enjoy it and it cost a few quid? The sun will still rise in the morning   |
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OP are you comfortable in other social situations? If you can chat to other people in a non sexual social setting then you will get on just great at a swinging club.
It really is just like a pub/nightclub where people may get naked later in the evening and have a bit of naughty fun.
If you have difficulty in "normal" social settings there is every likelihood you will struggle at a club even if you can find someone to go with you the first time. The club scene isn't just about the sex, the social aspects are key to having a good time.
It is hard going to a club for the first time. If you weren't nervous I would think there is something wrong with you! The hardest part is just walking in the door. |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"Maybe it's because I don't know of any?
Sounds ridiculous, but I want to be discreet about this - none of my acquaintances would 'approve'."
Befriend a guy on here? There's a new post every week from a guy looking to meet a woman to go to a swingers club with him because he doesn't want to go on his own for the first time. |
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"
Befriend a guy on here? There's a new post every week from a guy looking to meet a woman to go to a swingers club with him because he doesn't want to go on his own for the first time."
That's the way to do it. Then there's no thoughts of ulterior motives.
And you'd both be really in the same situation as each other. |
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"
Befriend a guy on here? There's a new post every week from a guy looking to meet a woman to go to a swingers club with him because he doesn't want to go on his own for the first time.
That's the way to do it. Then there's no thoughts of ulterior motives.
And you'd both be really in the same situation as each other."
And what you’ll also find is that when it’s quiet of people or action single guys at clubs sit and chat together (compare notes!!) so you’re just making a friend up front |
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By *uwo OP Man
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
Thanks everyone - you are right, I just need to make the move. I’m a very determined person and once I’ve made my mind up, that’s it.
It’s just that I’d feel far more comfortable going with female company. |
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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago
ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL |
"Maybe it's because I don't know of any?
Sounds ridiculous, but I want to be discreet about this - none of my acquaintances would 'approve'.
Befriend a guy on here? There's a new post every week from a guy looking to meet a woman to go to a swingers club with him because he doesn't want to go on his own for the first time."
very good idea |
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"Thanks everyone - you are right, I just need to make the move. I’m a very determined person and once I’ve made my mind up, that’s it.
It’s just that I’d feel far more comfortable going with female company. "
You see it's the fact youre specifying female company thats the issue. If you were going to a strip club for the first time I bet you wouldn't want a woman to be the one holding your hand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks everyone - you are right, I just need to make the move. I’m a very determined person and once I’ve made my mind up, that’s it.
It’s just that I’d feel far more comfortable going with female company.
You see it's the fact youre specifying female company thats the issue. If you were going to a strip club for the first time I bet you wouldn't want a woman to be the one holding your hand."
Oh, I don't know |
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"OP; I’m off for my third club visit this coming Friday, by myself, to a club full of unknowns. My two previous club experiences were lack-lustre affairs, but it wasn’t down to the actual places, more the people in there at the time, and yes, some nervousness in my part. But the ‘fear factor’ has now gone for me, and it may take you two or three visits to settle in too. Just go, what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t enjoy it and it cost a few quid? The sun will still rise in the morning "
I’m just back from my visit to Atlantis this evening (by myself), and I get the feeling I am destined to only pick the quiet times! Never mind, had a great chat with my new mate Brian, a Geordie guy on his first ever visit to a club, and another guy from Lithuania (forget his name). I’ve had worse nights out I suppose, and the sun will still rise tomorrow |
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"OP; I’m off for my third club visit this coming Friday, by myself, to a club full of unknowns. My two previous club experiences were lack-lustre affairs, but it wasn’t down to the actual places, more the people in there at the time, and yes, some nervousness in my part. But the ‘fear factor’ has now gone for me, and it may take you two or three visits to settle in too. Just go, what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t enjoy it and it cost a few quid? The sun will still rise in the morning
I’m just back from my visit to Atlantis this evening (by myself), and I get the feeling I am destined to only pick the quiet times! Never mind, had a great chat with my new mate Brian, a Geordie guy on his first ever visit to a club, and another guy from Lithuania (forget his name). I’ve had worse nights out I suppose, and the sun will still rise tomorrow "
Whenever I've been to a club I've found they are generally busy on Saturday nights and most other times they are much quieter. The only exception to this was the curvy Thursday event at cupids which has been busy each time I've been.
Perhaps for any future visits it would be worth going on a Saturday to a club that allows single men (some are couples only) or choose a day when there is a popular event on at the club. |
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"OP; I’m off for my third club visit this coming Friday, by myself, to a club full of unknowns. My two previous club experiences were lack-lustre affairs, but it wasn’t down to the actual places, more the people in there at the time, and yes, some nervousness in my part. But the ‘fear factor’ has now gone for me, and it may take you two or three visits to settle in too. Just go, what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t enjoy it and it cost a few quid? The sun will still rise in the morning
I’m just back from my visit to Atlantis this evening (by myself), and I get the feeling I am destined to only pick the quiet times! Never mind, had a great chat with my new mate Brian, a Geordie guy on his first ever visit to a club, and another guy from Lithuania (forget his name). I’ve had worse nights out I suppose, and the sun will still rise tomorrow
Whenever I've been to a club I've found they are generally busy on Saturday nights and most other times they are much quieter. The only exception to this was the curvy Thursday event at cupids which has been busy each time I've been.
Perhaps for any future visits it would be worth going on a Saturday to a club that allows single men (some are couples only) or choose a day when there is a popular event on at the club."
I have one more club visit planned, in January, but this time I’m going with a female friend, and it will be interesting to see whether there is a difference between going in as a single guy, or as a couple. I think I already know the answer lol |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"The trouble with two newbies going to a club together, is that if you enter as a couple and if you don't hit it off, you are left in the awkward position of spending hours with that person. It's far better to chat to a few regulars who go to a particular club and then go in as a single man and mingle with them as a free agent. Clubs are not as scary as people imagine "
They can still pay as singles or even pay as a couple. Surely no obligation to stay together once they feel comfortable in the club? I’ve met and taken guys to a club before. Depends on the type of night whether you have to stay as a couple or not. |
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"You've hit the nail on the head there. Not everyone has the necessary confidence at first both men and women.
I'd be as right as rain after I'd been there a while I'm sure."
And, what if she wants to go off and play |
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I've taken people to clubs before. Tried to help them as newbies. Never again. My night totally ruined by them either not knowing how to behave or having no social skills. I will never put myself in these situations again and would advice caution for anyone thinking of 'helping'. I know this sounds harsh but I am here for my fun and not to baby sit strangers. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
i just think it is interesting that the OP is a single guy... but doesn't want to be seen as a single guy....
it makes it sound like he does have some stigma against us single guys who have "put on our big boy pants" and have just gone.....
see.... i will never see what the difference between going to club not knowing people and talking to people... and going with someone you don't know, going to a club you don't know and talking to people...
in fact that would compound the issue even more....
if you are not a socialable person, then clubs are never going to be for you... regardless or whether you are a single or a couple!!!
if you are a socialable person... then just bloody go!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP I was shitty myself when I first went alone. I think the advice above is spot on, if you're a sociable type of fella and can easily converse with people then you will be fine. They are a friendly lot, you just need to say hi.
Go! |
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By *uwo OP Man
over a year ago
Ilkeston |
I will go, and am determined to do so. I would prefer to go with a female but if not, I am prepared to go on my own to see what the craic is.
Surely though, there is a limit to how many single men are allowed in. I can imagine men outnumbering women by a considerable amount. I don’t want to be hanging around a large group of single men - we would look like a load of desperate pervs imo. |
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"I will go, and am determined to do so. I would prefer to go with a female but if not, I am prepared to go on my own to see what the craic is.
Surely though, there is a limit to how many single men are allowed in. I can imagine men outnumbering women by a considerable amount. I don’t want to be hanging around a large group of single men - we would look like a load of desperate pervs imo. "
That will be the same if you go with your female accompaniment. She'll not want to be sat with you all night.
Most clubs men will be the largest single group. On a mixed night it might be similar number of men to couples and a few ladies. Read club reviews to gauge which club and night.
Then just go and see. It's like going to a bar. |
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"I will go, and am determined to do so. I would prefer to go with a female but if not, I am prepared to go on my own to see what the craic is.
Surely though, there is a limit to how many single men are allowed in. I can imagine men outnumbering women by a considerable amount. I don’t want to be hanging around a large group of single men - we would look like a load of desperate pervs imo. "
Unfortunately this is the way it will be in any club which ‘allows’ single men entry. But avoiding the ‘desperate perv’ look isn’t difficult |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"I will go, and am determined to do so. I would prefer to go with a female but if not, I am prepared to go on my own to see what the craic is.
Surely though, there is a limit to how many single men are allowed in. I can imagine men outnumbering women by a considerable amount. I don’t want to be hanging around a large group of single men - we would look like a load of desperate pervs imo. "
Yes, there are sometimes limits to the amount of single men allowed in. However if you met someone random on here to go with you wouldn't be a "couple" anyway, so you would still be counted in the single man limit. Unsure what your point is. |
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By *ucy LewdWoman
over a year ago
North Oxfordshire |
"The trouble with two newbies going to a club together, is that if you enter as a couple and if you don't hit it off, you are left in the awkward position of spending hours with that person. It's far better to chat to a few regulars who go to a particular club and then go in as a single man and mingle with them as a free agent. Clubs are not as scary as people imagine
They can still pay as singles or even pay as a couple. Surely no obligation to stay together once they feel comfortable in the club? I’ve met and taken guys to a club before. Depends on the type of night whether you have to stay as a couple or not. "
If you're paying as a couple then, imo, you should spend a decent chunk of the night together.
If you're paying as singles then no obligation to do so. |
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