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Abfabs dress code
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We have just returned home from a 100 mile wasted trip to abfabs. Gentlemen be advised that you wont be granted entry unless you have a shirt with a collar. We have been members for over 12 years and have never had this problem before but it would appear that the rules have now been changed. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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A black fetish mess shirt with a black leather waist coat. Its ok though because the staff advised us that tesco was open and we could go buy a shirt from there! |
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We were there tonight and we saw all sorts of poorly dressed males.
Personally don't understand a fixed dress code - surely the attire described is better than a scruffy shirt with collar and jeans?
We love going to Kestrels daytime, but really do not like the evening clubs - we generally go to enjoy the company of single men but tonight the male to female ratio was huge, and for me it just feels intimidating and therefore uncomfortable. |
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"We were there tonight and we saw all sorts of poorly dressed males.
Personally don't understand a fixed dress code - surely the attire described is better than a scruffy shirt with collar and jeans?
We love going to Kestrels daytime, but really do not like the evening clubs - we generally go to enjoy the company of single men but tonight the male to female ratio was huge, and for me it just feels intimidating and therefore uncomfortable."
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We have since been told that abfabs dont allow fetish dress on a friday. This is a little strange as the staff didnt seem to have a problem with the leather buckled corset that my partner was wearing, so it looks like a case of double standards depending on gender. We understand that scruffiness is not welcome in any club but I never have nor would I ever attend any event looking at all scruffy. We shall vote with our feet and after 12 years will no longer attend this club or support or promote it in any way. Our membership card has gone in the kitchen bin! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have since been told that abfabs dont allow fetish dress on a friday. This is a little strange as the staff didnt seem to have a problem with the leather buckled corset that my partner was wearing, so it looks like a case of double standards depending on gender. We understand that scruffiness is not welcome in any club but I never have nor would I ever attend any event looking at all scruffy. We shall vote with our feet and after 12 years will no longer attend this club or support or promote it in any way. Our membership card has gone in the kitchen bin!"
There have been many complaints about scruffy people being let in so it appears they are now applying adress code which is good if consistent. They do have a specific fetish night on Thursdays now. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We have since been told that abfabs dont allow fetish dress on a friday. This is a little strange as the staff didnt seem to have a problem with the leather buckled corset that my partner was wearing, so it looks like a case of double standards depending on gender. We understand that scruffiness is not welcome in any club but I never have nor would I ever attend any event looking at all scruffy. We shall vote with our feet and after 12 years will no longer attend this club or support or promote it in any way. Our membership card has gone in the kitchen bin!
There have been many complaints about scruffy people being let in so it appears they are now applying adress code which is good if consistent. They do have a specific fetish night on Thursdays now."
You are quite right that the club has the right to impose a dress code. That being said they could have explained the situation and since we were unaware of the new rules and that we are long standing members they could have made an exception especially as we had prepaid for our entry for the night. Of course they were quite happy to keep our money. |
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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago
A world of my own |
I'm not really a club goer, however on the few occasions I've been to clubs, I've seen some interesting attire on men and women. My view is that it's meant to be a safe place of expression and acceptance. Therefore why judge? A dress code so that no one comes in trainer's, or in a dress down where everyone's on a level playing field is great, however this does seem odd! |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
Shirt with a collar, that's rubbish.
I can look very smart with a jacket a roundnecked collar on my shirt and trousers or black jeans with shoes
Whilst I agree the last time I went ona Friday there was guys in outfits that were tshirts and jeans and trainers
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Shirt with a collar, that's rubbish.
I can look very smart with a jacket a roundnecked collar on my shirt and trousers or black jeans with shoes
Whilst I agree the last time I went ona Friday there was guys in outfits that were tshirts and jeans and trainers
"
We agree, t-shirts and trainers show very little effort and should be discouraged. Just for the record I was wearing a pair or tan leather shoes that cost over £200 and my trainers were safely tucked up at home! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have since been told that abfabs dont allow fetish dress on a friday. This is a little strange as the staff didnt seem to have a problem with the leather buckled corset that my partner was wearing, so it looks like a case of double standards depending on gender. We understand that scruffiness is not welcome in any club but I never have nor would I ever attend any event looking at all scruffy. We shall vote with our feet and after 12 years will no longer attend this club or support or promote it in any way. Our membership card has gone in the kitchen bin!"
That's rubbish I wear Fetish wear there most of the time. Especially latex. Which staff members were working? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We have since been told that abfabs dont allow fetish dress on a friday. This is a little strange as the staff didnt seem to have a problem with the leather buckled corset that my partner was wearing, so it looks like a case of double standards depending on gender. We understand that scruffiness is not welcome in any club but I never have nor would I ever attend any event looking at all scruffy. We shall vote with our feet and after 12 years will no longer attend this club or support or promote it in any way. Our membership card has gone in the kitchen bin!
That's rubbish I wear Fetish wear there most of the time. Especially latex. Which staff members were working?"
Im afraid its not rubbish it really happened. Ive no idea who the lady was and it wouldnt be fair to name names even if I did. |
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Seems your dress was almost fetishy if leather waste coat and mesh tshirt,
i do find it bizarre lots of men do not care how they look on any given night, not yours by the way
I assume they are wanting to appeal a more smarter attire.
And some men look like they eere dragged in off of the street.
We did walk around with just towels after a swim, in the dungeon area and was told to get dressed though.!!
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We attended last Friday and there were quite a few very scruffily dressed guys lurking around the place. For the first time it made us feel a little uncomfortable. I'm hoping this means they're now enforcing a better dress code, but I'm sorry you got caught in the crossfire. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They need to focus on the quality of guests and to reinforce some of the rules (e.g on Saturdays :-husbands wandering around without their wives, trying to get a cheeky play )..not the dress attire |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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is this change been advertised anywhere?
i go to kestrals and stay on for the evening ,also love just having a robe on i feel more comfortable than in normal clothes , do you think i will have to dress |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Monday-wednesday you can stay om from kestrals daytime and not have to dress for the evening.
Friday and Saturday nights you have to dress smart we fully agree about the scruffy single men as when we went on a friday a month back there were lots in sports slogan tshirts.
Original poster we agree that your attire was not inappropriate at all in fact it was smart.
Perhaps there should be a ratio of single men to couples and single ladies perhaps a 2-1 may work so for every 2 couples or 2 females or combo there should be 1 single man. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have just returned home from a 100 mile wasted trip to abfabs. Gentlemen be advised that you wont be granted entry unless you have a shirt with a collar. We have been members for over 12 years and have never had this problem before but it would appear that the rules have now been changed. "
You should have gone to the 24 hour tesco and bought a shirt |
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"We have just returned home from a 100 mile wasted trip to abfabs. Gentlemen be advised that you wont be granted entry unless you have a shirt with a collar. We have been members for over 12 years and have never had this problem before but it would appear that the rules have now been changed.
You should have gone to the 24 hour tesco and bought a shirt"
they were advised to.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's weird, I've turned up in jeans and a tee before and they've let me in
They did say I wasn't gonna attract anyone dressed like that lol, I told them, I don't plan to keep my clothes on  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were there tonight and we saw all sorts of poorly dressed males.
Personally don't understand a fixed dress code - surely the attire described is better than a scruffy shirt with collar and jeans?
We love going to Kestrels daytime, but really do not like the evening clubs - we generally go to enjoy the company of single men but tonight the male to female ratio was huge, and for me it just feels intimidating and therefore uncomfortable."
Wish I'd have known you were there . Your stunning Mrs x |
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"That's weird, I've turned up in jeans and a tee before and they've let me in
They did say I wasn't gonna attract anyone dressed like that lol, I told them, I don't plan to keep my clothes on "
well hopefully they wont let you in like that again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were there tonight and we saw all sorts of poorly dressed males.
Personally don't understand a fixed dress code - surely the attire described is better than a scruffy shirt with collar and jeans?
We love going to Kestrels daytime, but really do not like the evening clubs - we generally go to enjoy the company of single men but tonight the male to female ratio was huge, and for me it just feels intimidating and therefore uncomfortable."
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Abfabs epitomises all that is wrong with swinging these days.Predatory males with no manners hunting in packs like jackals.Scruufy people lounging around in towels late in the evening.People on mobiles taking pics.It used to be so good.Sadly no more. |
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Probably wanted to try and get more cash out of you.
We were there a few months ago and two guy's got told that they couldn't come in as over subscribed on that evening, however if they were willing to pay £150 EACH they could come in.
They paid!
We have seen some really scruffy guy's look like taxi drivers just got off their shift.
I think the staff should lead by example and the guy's wear suits and women dresses.
If they are going to enforce dress code then it should be shirt and tie.
No jeans not even dark ones.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Monday-wednesday you can stay om from kestrals daytime and not have to dress for the evening.
Friday and Saturday nights you have to dress smart we fully agree about the scruffy single men as when we went on a friday a month back there were lots in sports slogan tshirts.
Original poster we agree that your attire was not inappropriate at all in fact it was smart.
Perhaps there should be a ratio of single men to couples and single ladies perhaps a 2-1 may work so for every 2 couples or 2 females or combo there should be 1 single man. "
That was how it was supposed to be on a Friday night (apart Friday from greedy girls night) However nobody is convinced they stick to that rule. |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"Probably wanted to try and get more cash out of you.
We were there a few months ago and two guy's got told that they couldn't come in as over subscribed on that evening, however if they were willing to pay £150 EACH they could come in.
They paid!
We have seen some really scruffy guy's look like taxi drivers just got off their shift.
I think the staff should lead by example and the guy's wear suits and women dresses.
If they are going to enforce dress code then it should be shirt and tie.
No jeans not even dark ones.
"
I certainly wouldn't go if this was the enforced dress code of shirt and tie. I wear a suit without a tie to work, and I look bloody smart.
You can look smart with jeans if black or dark navy. I have collared shirts with dark jeans that I wouldn't wear at abfabs because they don't look smart but because they are collared I would be allowed in;
I have white or black round necked long sleeved shirts shirts that worn with a smart jacket and Trousers or dark jeans I wouldn't be let in
To be honest there are ways to look smart and presentable. I have played at clubs when I have worn dark jeans and short sleeve white shirt, I have played in clubs wearing fancy dress, I have played in clubs wearing a suit.
One of many reasons why I have stopped going |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Abfabs epitomises all that is wrong with swinging these days.Predatory males with no manners hunting in packs like jackals.Scruufy people lounging around in towels late in the evening.People on mobiles taking pics.It used to be so good.Sadly no more."
I would like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass. Pack of jackals hunting flat chested hyena # lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Abfabs epitomises all that is wrong with swinging these days.Predatory males with no manners hunting in packs like jackals.Scruufy people lounging around in towels late in the evening.People on mobiles taking pics.It used to be so good.Sadly no more."
Anybody reported taking pics is ejected, certainly not a problem we've witnessed! |
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I've always attended clubs in tight black jeans and a fitted plain T-shirt without an issue. Having to dress up for AbFabs when I want to be naked in the pool for half the night is what puts me off going. If the club has a wet area, I'd rather it be dress down/towels and robes. |
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There are a certain group of men who describe themselves as "travellers" (sic) who seem to be allowed to break the rules repeatedly by wearing wrong clothes and being disrespectful and rude inside.
That has put me off of going Friday nights.
I actually witnessed one guy from the group saying "I paid my money so who is gonna suck my cock?!"
Bloody ridiculous that this is overlooked by management.
I should add there are also some really lovely guys who attend who are also from the travelling community who are perfect gentlemen. Always polite, curteous, friendly and dressed to impress! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The times ive had trousers and shirts all over the floor in cinema and dark room...often trodden on lol..so i avoid wearing my very best clothes..semi smart us my style for clubs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok, we have been contacted by the club. They have informed us that the staff made a mistake and that we should have been allowed entry. Fetish wear is acceptable on a friday but everyday shirts without collars arent. Apologies have been made and an offer been made to refund our prepaid ticket. Whilst we welcome this we still feel that we where treated very badly and feel that whilst any club has the right to set its own dress code, the said club should make sure that its door staff are fully aware of what this code actually is, especially as it would appear that other people had been granted entry who were wearing t-shirts on the same night. It is more than likely that we wont ever attend the club again. |
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By *umpkinMan
over a year ago
near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack! |
"The times ive had trousers and shirts all over the floor in cinema and dark room...often trodden on lol..so i avoid wearing my very best clothes..semi smart us my style for clubs "
This is why I prefer dress down clubs! At least if your towel gets wet or dirty you can just go back to the bar and get another!
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I have been to abfabs on a Friday, which I think is when the fetish night is held, wearing a collar-less faux leather top, sleeveless as well, had no problem getting in. And being a member for the 10+ years you say, surely you would be known to the staff....
Strange, and I feel for you...100 miles is a hell of a distance. Let it be a lesson for party organisers, and venue owners, bad publicity, is bad...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The club have apologised, offered to refund the fee, suggest you move on, mistakes happen "
Its not quite as simple as that. We have limit time available to go out due to work. We have moved on, on to pastures new.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have been to abfabs on a Friday, which I think is when the fetish night is held, wearing a collar-less faux leather top, sleeveless as well, had no problem getting in. And being a member for the 10+ years you say, surely you would be known to the staff....
Strange, and I feel for you...100 miles is a hell of a distance. Let it be a lesson for party organisers, and venue owners, bad publicity, is bad... "
It would appear that the staff were new and there was no management on the site last friday. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was there few weeks back on Friday night and certain single guys can wear what the want and be as scruffy and unhygienic as they want because they are willing to pay over the top to be let in. Trainers, t-shirts. Everything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Probably wanted to try and get more cash out of you.
We were there a few months ago and two guy's got told that they couldn't come in as over subscribed on that evening, however if they were willing to pay £150 EACH they could come in.
They paid!
We have seen some really scruffy guy's look like taxi drivers just got off their shift.
I think the staff should lead by example and the guy's wear suits and women dresses.
If they are going to enforce dress code then it should be shirt and tie.
No jeans not even dark ones.
"
What the fuck you on about"scruffy guys look like taxi drivers"i was and have family on the taxi's also friends and not one of them is scruffy or unkept in any way,most go gym and because they are in the public eye are clean and well groomed so next time think of another way to get point over dickhead |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Probably wanted to try and get more cash out of you.
We were there a few months ago and two guy's got told that they couldn't come in as over subscribed on that evening, however if they were willing to pay £150 EACH they could come in.
They paid!
We have seen some really scruffy guy's look like taxi drivers just got off their shift.
I think the staff should lead by example and the guy's wear suits and women dresses.
If they are going to enforce dress code then it should be shirt and tie.
No jeans not even dark ones.
What the fuck you on about"scruffy guys look like taxi drivers"i was and have family on the taxi's also friends and not one of them is scruffy or unkept in any way,most go gym and because they are in the public eye are clean and well groomed so next time think of another way to get point over dickhead "
Ha ha ha. I love this thread. I agree with you on this sir . Some people commented on this thread are like bag of pampers. self absorbed and full of shit.  |
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