FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > BEHAVIOUR IN CLUBS
BEHAVIOUR IN CLUBS
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I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"complain to the management first off - a quiet word from them might be all thats needed -
i know the management very well, and trust me, they were made aware of the situation."
fingers crossed people start to be more considerate of others x |
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Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon.
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was this at quest last night? I agree. People stood in play rooms chatting taking up room of people that wanted to play. I.E. ME and probably other people. |
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"Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their
club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon. The management have been made aware of my concerns, and hopefully they will deal with it.
xx"
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It's not always new people to be fair. One time at a club we go to it was a group of friends who, from the sound of it, knew each other well and came often who were joking around with people they knew who were playing in an open room. Killed the mood totally.
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Yes it was Quest last night, and i had to resort to a private room in order to get some quiet time, and to try and get back into the mood to play.
people always comment why do others come to a club and then play in private, well for this very reason.
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"It's not always new people to be fair. One time at a club we go to it was a group of friends who, from the sound of it, knew each other well and came often who were joking around with people they knew who were playing in an open room. Killed the mood totally.
"
unfortunately, there were people being loud who should have known better, not just newbies |
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There will always be a odd few, especially when there is so many people in a club. However I have to agree, last night had more than its fair share of ignorance.
It takes two mins to clean a bed down. Everything is there to use!
Let's just say we prefer midweek at the club, tends to be a lot more relaxed and civilised |
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"It's not always new people to be fair. One time at a club we go to it was a group of friends who, from the sound of it, knew each other well and came often who were joking around with people they knew who were playing in an open room. Killed the mood totally.
unfortunately, there were people being loud who should have known better, not just newbies"
Definitely! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had it in a club. Me and a past partner were getting down and dirty in a club when a group of guys including a regular started laughing really loudly, I took it as a personal attack on me and went mad at them. This is one thing that bugs me at clubs. |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
"I've had it in a club. Me and a past partner were getting down and dirty in a club when a group of guys including a regular started laughing really loudly, I took it as a personal attack on me and went mad at them. This is one thing that bugs me at clubs. "
That sounds like an issue with you, rather than the club, surely? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have been the one to clean up after guys that think it's alright to leave used condoms and mess all over beds. I always clean the room after I have been in. Paper towels and wet wipe everything down after using them. I have had it once where a guy used my towel to clean himself and walk off. Some have no respect. Also guys if you make a mess just clean it up. Really puts me off clubs when some just abuse the place. Rant over |
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"Clubs where ppl cant laugh. Sounds real fun lol  "
the issue isnt with people laughing, its with people having no respect in the playrooms when others are playing.
Im sure your erection would soon droop when listening to someone talking about their weekly shop at tesco, and their sons first day at school.
the play rooms are for playing, go chat in the bar. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Clubs where ppl cant laugh. Sounds real fun lol
the issue isnt with people laughing, its with people having no respect in the playrooms when others are playing.
Im sure your erection would soon droop when listening to someone talking about their weekly shop at tesco, and their sons first day at school.
the play rooms are for playing, go chat in the bar."
I cant say it would tbh.  |
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"Clubs where ppl cant laugh. Sounds real fun lol
the issue isnt with people laughing, its with people having no respect in the playrooms when others are playing.
Im sure your erection would soon droop when listening to someone talking about their weekly shop at tesco, and their sons first day at school.
the play rooms are for playing, go chat in the bar."
Sorry to hear it was a poor experience.
Running around and removing towels seems very strange behaviour for someone trying to hook up.
We do like quest, luckily this issue hasn't cropped up on the cpl nights we've been to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Managing bad behaviour is ultimately down to staff/management. Club owners are invariably in the game to make money but in today's climate where there are clubs everywhere, not quite sure who's making money or any serious money anyway. This might have a knock on effect as to how much staff they employ and and where to place them. We've been to clubs where staff stay behind the bar and hardly ever mingle or walk round to see what's going on for hours at a time. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
i have to say i was in club last night and despite me being ina scene all night, completely obvious, by the fact i was in a collar, on a leash, cuffed and blindfolded..no less that 8 people touched me without asking. two swiped at my ass causing me to stumble whilst walking around following my Dom , which i do totally successfully, without incident.
earlier in the evening i had been sat in a corner while he got a plate of food and i was left alone by others..no such luck when he stood me in a corner so i didn't get trampled in the locker room. i actually thought he was supervising as one by one i was fondled ..everything was ok until one woman decide to reach out and actually not only pinch my nipples really hard but she maliciously twisted them as well...when i threw my hands up in a flight or flight reaction..i got laughed at..totally uncalled for and deeply upsetting..don't touch a sub without a Dom's permission..ever. we've learnt our lesson he wont be leaving me unattended ever again..it made us both feel like shit..luckily we had some quiet time together and i recovered my space and equilibrium..but no respect is still no respect..people should grow some manners.. |
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"Clubs where ppl cant laugh. Sounds real fun lol
the issue isnt with people laughing, its with people having no respect in the playrooms when others are playing.
Im sure your erection would soon droop when listening to someone talking about their weekly shop at tesco, and their sons first day at school.
the play rooms are for playing, go chat in the bar.
Sorry to hear it was a poor experience.
Running around and removing towels seems very strange behaviour for someone trying to hook up.
We do like quest, luckily this issue hasn't cropped up on the cpl nights we've been to."
unfortunately, the people who were being loud and disrespectful, were couples and the female halves of couples. Perhaps you've been lucky so far in your experiences. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"That is awful, and its usually done by people who have absolutely no knowledge of swinging, and have no respect for others."
i would have reported but of course i couldn't see who they were..  as soon as he got back he stopped it), but of course by then it had happened.. |
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )"
Loving this thread because it's spot on!
We've stopped going a club on a Saturday night cos certain couples have now made it in to a social night.. We've even been where they sit on the beds and block the playrooms so they can chat shite about the x factor etc
If these people are just going clubs for a social why can't they just go a local pub.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Clubs where ppl cant laugh. Sounds real fun lol
the issue isnt with people laughing, its with people having no respect in the playrooms when others are playing.
Im sure your erection would soon droop when listening to someone talking about their weekly shop at tesco, and their sons first day at school.
the play rooms are for playing, go chat in the bar.
Sorry to hear it was a poor experience.
Running around and removing towels seems very strange behaviour for someone trying to hook up.
We do like quest, luckily this issue hasn't cropped up on the cpl nights we've been to.
unfortunately, the people who were being loud and disrespectful, were couples and the female halves of couples. Perhaps you've been lucky so far in your experiences. "
to be honest I think it happens more on couples nights although we were either too busy or in a different area when it was happening last night. But do know what the OP means |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People not clearing up their squirt puddles and women wearing heels on beds and puncturing holes into them really fuck me off too.
If you ladies wanna wear heels during sex, get on the floor. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had it in a club. Me and a past partner were getting down and dirty in a club when a group of guys including a regular started laughing really loudly, I took it as a personal attack on me and went mad at them. This is one thing that bugs me at clubs.
That sounds like an issue with you, rather than the club, surely?"
Not really no it was in. Very small bedroom in a club in south London the guys came in someone said something they all started howling with laughter it put me off and killed the atmosphere. It's as the OP stated it's the disrespect against people using the rooms to play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I totally understand about couples using some clubs has a social meeting place and like you said yourself they sit on the beds chatting, when their are sofas to do the chatting on. But social chat is part of the swinging scene has you chat to others to get to know them and than hope you can have some fun with them later |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I totally understand about couples using some clubs has a social meeting place and like you said yourself they sit on the beds chatting, when their are sofas to do the chatting on. But social chat is part of the swinging scene has you chat to others to get to know them and than hope you can have some fun with them later"
True, but the place for that is the bar/lounge area, smoking area and even the wet area but definitely not the play area. Imho chatting in the play areas should be completely banned. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )"
I don't think not knowing about club etiquette is the problem, it sounds like their chavy scum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I totally understand about couples using some clubs has a social meeting place and like you said yourself they sit on the beds chatting, when their are sofas to do the chatting on. But social chat is part of the swinging scene has you chat to others to get to know them and than hope you can have some fun with them later
True, but the place for that is the bar/lounge area, smoking area and even the wet area but definitely not the play area. Imho chatting in the play areas should be completely banned."
erm be a bit hard to play then... talking is okay as long as its appropriate... like banter and chatting to other people wanting to play |
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I have to agree with some of the comments.
Our first time at CJs was going great got chatting to lots of couples but this one particular woman just wound me up all night.
She would constantly butt into conversations we were having with people she knew from the club and like someone has said we were playing in the open room and all you could hear was her talking about how she had been coming to the club for years and knew everyone on the swinger scene.
She was politely told to shut the fuck up then proceeded to whine at the club owner to have the guy thrown out that said it.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Imho chatting in the play areas should be completely banned.
erm be a bit hard to play then... talking is okay as long as its appropriate... like banter and chatting to other people wanting to play "
Discussing play related matters and chatting in between those who participate in play is a different story. I mean observers should be banned from chatting. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
" Imho chatting in the play areas should be completely banned.
erm be a bit hard to play then... talking is okay as long as its appropriate... like banter and chatting to other people wanting to play
Discussing play related matters and chatting in between those who participate in play is a different story. I mean observers should be banned from chatting. "
yes someone walked intot dungeon last night as said (something like) out loud.."what you doing that for..oh well whatever floats your boat" people cant keep their thoughts in their bodies obviously..  |
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We go to cjs and only ever play in the couples or private rooms. We were in the couples room quite recently with a single female and the people mingling around chatting was totally off putting. Luckily for us cj came in and told the crowd if they weren't in the room with the intention of playing then could they please chat outside the room. This has been the case a few times lately. We don't mind people watching but not as some of the others have said standing around chatting about the telly.
K x |
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I think it's an all round problem of respect. I've never been to a club but do go dogging every so often. People don't know what side lights are anymore. They have to shine the main beams into cars and just think all they have to do is turn up and they get fun. |
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It happens and I've experienced it many times. I just says 'sorry guys would you mind moving/talking elsewhere/not interrupting' or whatever the circumstances are and it usually works. Sometimes I get a face pull or bitching but I dont care. People should have more awareness of how distracting and disrespectful it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sometimes people are disrespectful! Pulling my towel! That's isn't cool! Also have many socialising spaces! Not in the bed! How hard is to be considered? People want to have fun,and comes a chatter box ,to spoil it? Should have reminders signs!People must to behave and respect! Dirty condoms outrageous! You should complain! X |
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"Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon.
xx"
spot on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is the one thing that annoys me at couples night at Abfabs when in the public play areas friends are using it as a social area and just chatting. Even when in the huts you hear people yacking on. What sticks in mind l was in dom impact scene and some idiot said at the top of his voice, 'if it was me she would be screaming' l was tempted to give him the full taste of the whip. However I just felt sorry for anyone who fell into his hands. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon.
xx"
We go to a very nice club near Manchester and have seen the same...first timers who think it is fun to run around and "stress" others..or do a running commentary when people are having fun in an open room.
When management "grabs" them and asks these couples/singles to leave they shout abuse and call staff racists and worse... The next step is to slander the club on forums
We agree with OP it is growing worse and thank God clubs like Townhouse and our club have private rooms....
PS Townhouse is a nice place been once missing time to get there as a long drive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon.
xx
We go to a very nice club near Manchester and have seen the same...first timers who think it is fun to run around and "stress" others..or do a running commentary when people are having fun in an open room.
When management "grabs" them and asks these couples/singles to leave they shout abuse and call staff racists and worse... The next step is to slander the club on forums
We agree with OP it is growing worse and thank God clubs like Townhouse and our club have private rooms....
PS Townhouse is a nice place been once missing time to get there as a long drive "
been once it was clicky like most have a click the regulars snarlin at visitors that is another annoyance too bitchiness in. Clubs it puts people off from going back.... |
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By *werty38Man
over a year ago
Staffordshire |
I was thinking of posting something like this myself a few weeks ago. I am and have been a regular at a club for around 16 years and have to say in the last 6 months or so the basic manners of people seem to have deteriorated.
The club I go to has several flights of stairs. I always give way to people and wait if there are people on them, The last few time I have been barged out of the way from people behind me who push past both me and the people already on them.
Other occasions I have been sitting chatting to people in the Jacuzzi leaving enough personal space between us only to have single guys come and sit in the space (not that there really was one) despite the other side of the Jacuzzi being empty !
The club also had a night recently that allowed non members in and I ended up leaving early as it was obvious that the non members who were in had no idea of etiquette let alone manners and I and others felt very uncomfortable.
I appreciate that everyone who is a member of a club is entitled to have a good time but please respect others and have some basic manners. |
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By *arnieWoman
over a year ago
Ashton in Makerfield |
"Woh! People running down corridors and treating the place like a playground is NOT how swingers should behave!
We all want to have fun and we all have different definitions of fun, but although swingers clubs are adult playgrounds, it doesn't mean that childish behaviour should be acceptable. I am sure the club in question would value your feedback as they may want to look at how they 'induct' new swingers to their club so that they are aware of what is acceptable and what is frowned upon.
xx
We go to a very nice club near Manchester and have seen the same...first timers who think it is fun to run around and "stress" others..or do a running commentary when people are having fun in an open room.
When management "grabs" them and asks these couples/singles to leave they shout abuse and call staff racists and worse... The next step is to slander the club on forums
We agree with OP it is growing worse and thank God clubs like Townhouse and our club have private rooms....
PS Townhouse is a nice place been once missing time to get there as a long drive been once it was clicky like most have a click the regulars snarlin at visitors that is another annoyance too bitchiness in. Clubs it puts people off from going back...."
That's funny because I have found the complete opposite, as has my male friend who went alone as a single guy. Both of us found Townhouse to be very welcoming indeed and the regulars actually came over an introduced themselves. My male friend went to the Newbies night on a Weds and couldn't believe how well he was treated as a single guy; he had previously had a bad experience in another club where he was treated like a second rate citizen, so he said it redeemed his faith in clubs. Maybe you are misinterpreting cliques for friends catching up with each other. I personally went over to such groups for a chat and was welcomed in. Sometimes people can give off bad vibes and seem unapproachable...maybe this was your problem. |
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By *ollipop77Couple
over a year ago
Sunny Manchester |
"It's not always new people to be fair. One time at a club we go to it was a group of friends who, from the sound of it, knew each other well and came often who were joking around with people they knew who were playing in an open room. Killed the mood totally.
unfortunately, there were people being loud who should have known better, not just newbies"
We have been to this certain club a few times and encountered this every time! I have spoken to the people concerned and been told where to go, it's there club and they have been attending since it was opened, was what I was told. On one occasion two single guys came in the couples room. I asked them to leave and they told me they had the right to stay as there was no door to stop them coming in.
The worst sort of people at any club is DRUNK people.
Totally fallen out of love with the club. |
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"Are these extreme cases or fairly common.
The wife and I were thinking about visiting a club in leeds when we visit over Christmas.
We're nervous enough as it is without this kind of behaviour.
D"
Don't let these comments put you off. Research the club you have chosen, ring and speak to the club themselves, then if you are happy go on a couples night for your first time. If you can find a couple on here to hold your hands sometimes that helps.
You don't have to play.... ever
Look in the club reviews
Be brave, the right club is very very worth it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are these extreme cases or fairly common.
The wife and I were thinking about visiting a club in leeds when we visit over Christmas.
We're nervous enough as it is without this kind of behaviour.
D"
I'm finding that it's happening more often. Best experiences at Townhouse and the VA, they've been great clubs with good members. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think people do this on purpose, I think sometimes they don't realize they are annoying anyone and sit there chatting while watching. But again I understand it can be annoying when you are playing, and how often to you get this, every now and then. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think people do this on purpose, I think sometimes they don't realize they are annoying anyone and sit there chatting while watching. But again I understand it can be annoying when you are playing, and how often to you get this, every now and then."
i went to a north club once. Used the lockable room with a sexy lady as she was shy when with in 5minutes the door was actually kicked in... No need to say he was from overseas the following type never mind bloody brexit he did break it the mood and the door too lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Agree
Was at a club last week and whilst having fun in the playrooms a few guys pulled the door several times and then made snide comments cos we wouldn't admit him. This went for for 45mins and then a group of guys were standing chatting loudly getting more d*unk in the hallway. Very off-putting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Agree
Was at a club last week and whilst having fun in the playrooms a few guys pulled the door several times and then made snide comments cos we wouldn't admit him. This went for for 45mins and then a group of guys were standing chatting loudly getting more d*unk in the hallway. Very off-putting"
I've actually witnesed guys to climb over A partition just to peep between rooms
Then get upset because they never got invited in the room ....a lot of crazy people about. Take care genuine sexy people love you all the synergy is there fabbers  |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
We generally find people behave well in clubs - and most are considerate, though I do agree that it can be very off-putting when people start loudly discussing their shopping, operations, football etc once their own bit of action is over or they're waiting for their turn. |
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By *oo hotCouple
over a year ago
North West |
We have been going to Clubs for more than ten years and our impression is that there is NEVER a problem in the big and popular clubs that have reputations to uphold. Look on the Club reviews for the big and popular Clubs. The only issues we have ever experienced have been at smaller Clubs. We have decided to go to Clubs less often, but to travel and get a better overall experience by going to more well established venues. What the OP describes is not acceptable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cultural difference is a big problem in swinging. Some think that a woman in a club is fair game ..., we've seen it in lots of clubs Sad to see as its a few that give the majority a bad band "
I agree with this. I was playing with a friend in a dark room on Saturday and next thing I know there's 4 other men sticking cock in my mouth and playing with me etc. No asking me or my friend if it was okay. One even pretty much pushed my friend out the way so he could fuck me. Its not much of an issue for me because I don't mind people wanting to play with me without asking but if it had been anyone else I dont think it would have gone down well. This was all by single men who don't seem to have much respect in clubs for couples and single women. If I'd have been there alone I would have been genuinely scared. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cultural difference is a big problem in swinging. Some think that a woman in a club is fair game ..., we've seen it in lots of clubs Sad to see as its a few that give the majority a bad band
I agree with this. I was playing with a friend in a dark room on Saturday and next thing I know there's 4 other men sticking cock in my mouth and playing with me etc. No asking me or my friend if it was okay. One even pretty much pushed my friend out the way so he could fuck me. Its not much of an issue for me because I don't mind people wanting to play with me without asking but if it had been anyone else I dont think it would have gone down well. This was all by single men who don't seem to have much respect in clubs for couples and single women. If I'd have been there alone I would have been genuinely scared. "
That is awful. They should have asked if they could watch/ join in or at least wait until invited. Some men need to learn respect. Not all ladies that go to a club want to be hassled by guys that have very little respect. Should have informed staff and got them kicked out for that type of behaviour. Sorry on behalf all men
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cultural difference is a big problem in swinging. Some think that a woman in a club is fair game ..., we've seen it in lots of clubs Sad to see as its a few that give the majority a bad band
I agree with this. I was playing with a friend in a dark room on Saturday and next thing I know there's 4 other men sticking cock in my mouth and playing with me etc. No asking me or my friend if it was okay. One even pretty much pushed my friend out the way so he could fuck me. Its not much of an issue for me because I don't mind people wanting to play with me without asking but if it had been anyone else I dont think it would have gone down well. This was all by single men who don't seem to have much respect in clubs for couples and single women. If I'd have been there alone I would have been genuinely scared.
That is awful. They should have asked if they could watch/ join in or at least wait until invited. Some men need to learn respect. Not all ladies that go to a club want to be hassled by guys that have very little respect. Should have informed staff and got them kicked out for that type of behaviour. Sorry on behalf all men
"
It was my first time at this one so didn't really want to make a scene tbh. I find it less of an issue if im with a fuck bud as I know they'll step in if i pipe up but would have been quite difficult to do so with a few men all over me. Would have just left if I'd have been alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )"
Is this a sex club or a museum? Other than leaving rubbish i dont see an issue with anything else. Your getting fucked by a stranger and your worried about people having fun running around.
Or people talking where someone is having an orgasm.
Maybe you had to be there but reading the reactions dont think id get on with people who frequent these places anyway. Too many rules. I understand a womans right to say no and thats respected. But you cant police people talking or having fun.
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )
Is this a sex club or a museum? Other than leaving rubbish i dont see an issue with anything else. Your getting fucked by a stranger and your worried about people having fun running around.
Or people talking where someone is having an orgasm.
Maybe you had to be there but reading the reactions dont think id get on with people who frequent these places anyway. Too many rules. I understand a womans right to say no and thats respected. But you cant police people talking or having fun.
"
While you can't police people having fun (and why would you want to do that) there is such a thing as having respect for others. Not everyone wants a free for all and some people are not as experienced or confident.
In the main we have had lots of fun fucking and being fucked with/by strangers (and quite a few orgasms!) but we have also come across quite a few of the off putting behaviours highlighted in this thread. Why is it some people think that swinging is an excuse to treat people badly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )"
We've sat and had several discussions about this over the last couple of days, and have both that had it not being for a select few people, we would have left early, we've drawn the conclusion that far too much alcohol had been consumed by certain people, maybe Saturday was a one off as it had been the Leeds beer festival before hand. Luckily we we're invited to a private room by a lovely couple who soon got us back in the mood and we had a great night regardless of the rowdy people, might give Saturday nights a wide birth though from now on, ess |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
Actually I was playing with someone on Saturday and as we were just getting started the guy pops his head round the door and said can I watch or join in...tbh he hadn't spoke to either of us earliar in the evening but he wasn't rude - we did say no in this ocasion. However i did say thanks for asking
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )
Is this a sex club or a museum? Other than leaving rubbish i dont see an issue with anything else. Your getting fucked by a stranger and your worried about people having fun running around.
Or people talking where someone is having an orgasm.
Maybe you had to be there but reading the reactions dont think id get on with people who frequent these places anyway. Too many rules. I understand a womans right to say no and thats respected. But you cant police people talking or having fun.
"
Yes it's a swingers club, not a running club and not a free for all.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want. |
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By *iReyWoman
over a year ago
Cheshire East |
Me and my fiance have been going to clubs about 3 years now and always get fed up of people not wiping down play areas after themselves, wearing heels on the beds, talking loudly amongst themselves in play areas, talking loudly about others playing and basically acting like a group of teenagers. It's not hard to be respectful and clean is it? |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want. "
swingers clubs are not sex clubs..we all have or should have the right to be asked before being touched and the right to say no..and others are stating there are social areas in clubs for just such a purpose as chatting about whatever they want, they are just asking for a bit of consideration in the play areas..its not too much to ask..
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"Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want. "
It's not a case of everyone getting what they want, life's not like that. Why is it that some misguided people think that because they are in a 'sex club' (oh dear!) it's alright not to be inconsiderate and rude. |
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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago
leeds |
"Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want. "
I'm confused. Why would anyone make excuses for inconsiderate behaviour? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im not making excuses for bad behaviour. By all means of people are rude. Over step the mark. Are generally disorderly walking round laughing at people etc i could understand the post but the woman is moaning about people running or chasimg others and talking. Hardly seems disrespectful to me |
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"It happens and I've experienced it many times. I just says 'sorry guys would you mind moving/talking elsewhere/not interrupting' or whatever the circumstances are and it usually works. Sometimes I get a face pull or bitching but I dont care. People should have more awareness of how distracting and disrespectful it is. "
I've had to do this on a couple of occasions, always politely but still get the dirty looks or back chat. We're in a playroom, I don't want to have to listen to others talk about their hotel booking experiences or their beautiful children. Can't you see I'm here to get fucked! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It happens and I've experienced it many times. I just says 'sorry guys would you mind moving/talking elsewhere/not interrupting' or whatever the circumstances are and it usually works. Sometimes I get a face pull or bitching but I dont care. People should have more awareness of how distracting and disrespectful it is.
I've had to do this on a couple of occasions, always politely but still get the dirty looks or back chat. We're in a playroom, I don't want to have to listen to others talk about their hotel booking experiences or their beautiful children. Can't you see I'm here to get fucked!"
swingers do chat cheap at times ....who gives a duck about mundane stuff |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want. "
Children's games are for the playground, they would not be permitted in any adult venue were people meet to relax. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh come on what if it was a girl who wanted chasing. I doubt they were holding heata for the 100 meter final. Here you are asking people to be respectful of what you want from a sex club yet your not tolerating what they want.
Children's games are for the playground, they would not be permitted in any adult venue were people meet to relax."
so obviosly places must turn a blind eye to it just for single men. premiums |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Me and my fiance have been going to clubs about 3 years now and always get fed up of people not wiping down play areas after themselves, wearing heels on the beds, talking loudly amongst themselves in play areas, talking loudly about others playing and basically acting like a group of teenagers. It's not hard to be respectful and clean is it? "
 +1 |
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Behaviour can vary wildly in clubs.
We have seen horrendous behaviour but have had plenty of great times too. Can't seem to predict which it will be on any one night though sadly.
We wanted to try a scene with my tied and blindfolded and my Dom inviting people to play with me, but I'm nervous too many idiots will spoil it. Obviously my Dom would Never leave me unattended like that for a second, but even so, having to defend your sub or having consent arguments isn't conducive to a great night.
Think we'll keep that for proper fetish events and not try to mix the two so obviously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Behaviour can vary wildly in clubs.
We have seen horrendous behaviour but have had plenty of great times too. Can't seem to predict which it will be on any one night though sadly.
We wanted to try a scene with my tied and blindfolded and my Dom inviting people to play with me, but I'm nervous too many idiots will spoil it. Obviously my Dom would Never leave me unattended like that for a second, but even so, having to defend your sub or having consent arguments isn't conducive to a great night.
Think we'll keep that for proper fetish events and not try to mix the two so obviously. "
i have had a similar scenario a few times in clubs and not found anyone to be anything but respectful... |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"Behaviour can vary wildly in clubs.
We have seen horrendous behaviour but have had plenty of great times too. Can't seem to predict which it will be on any one night though sadly.
We wanted to try a scene with my tied and blindfolded and my Dom inviting people to play with me, but I'm nervous too many idiots will spoil it. Obviously my Dom would Never leave me unattended like that for a second, but even so, having to defend your sub or having consent arguments isn't conducive to a great night.
Think we'll keep that for proper fetish events and not try to mix the two so obviously. "
we are not going to stop what we do at swingers clubs, we will just tighten our own 'security' but the joy we get from the interactions with others during and after our scenes, because people come and talk to us, inspired by either the trust factor or curious about being a sub or a Dom or BDSM in general, is worth it...fet events for me are rather static...but if thats what makes you feel most comfortable. i am determined a few, wont spoil it for us. We learn through our experiences x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Behaviour can vary wildly in clubs.
We have seen horrendous behaviour but have had plenty of great times too. Can't seem to predict which it will be on any one night though sadly.
We wanted to try a scene with my tied and blindfolded and my Dom inviting people to play with me, but I'm nervous too many idiots will spoil it. Obviously my Dom would Never leave me unattended like that for a second, but even so, having to defend your sub or having consent arguments isn't conducive to a great night.
Think we'll keep that for proper fetish events and not try to mix the two so obviously. i have had a similar scenario a few times in clubs and not found anyone to be anything but respectful... "
l recently held a scene with a friend in Kestrels she was tied across the cage so that men could fondle her. She picked the men who could touch her. There were two men who were very well behaved to whom she gave happy endings. However it was a sunday afternoon l would not be keen to do it on a friday. We are thinking of doing the next scene at MSD.
But l agree behaviour can vary wildly. |
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"Behaviour can vary wildly in clubs.
We have seen horrendous behaviour but have had plenty of great times too. Can't seem to predict which it will be on any one night though sadly.
We wanted to try a scene with my tied and blindfolded and my Dom inviting people to play with me, but I'm nervous too many idiots will spoil it. Obviously my Dom would Never leave me unattended like that for a second, but even so, having to defend your sub or having consent arguments isn't conducive to a great night.
Think we'll keep that for proper fetish events and not try to mix the two so obviously. i have had a similar scenario a few times in clubs and not found anyone to be anything but respectful...
l recently held a scene with a friend in Kestrels she was tied across the cage so that men could fondle her. She picked the men who could touch her. There were two men who were very well behaved to whom she gave happy endings. However it was a sunday afternoon l would not be keen to do it on a friday. We are thinking of doing the next scene at MSD.
But l agree behaviour can vary wildly. "
MSD is a great place for scenes with respectful guys due to great hosting and well controlled guestlist |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )"
I think this is a trend for people's behaviour in general unfortunately x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am a regular club goer, and have been to many clubs over the years. Before my first time i read the entire clubs website to find out the ins and outs of how everything worked.
However, i have noticed, especially at my local club, that there is an increasing amount of new 'swingers' who come to the club, and have no idea about etiquette or how to behave.
People running down the corridor, pulling towels off others and laughing, loud conversations in the playrooms while people are trying to play, leaving used condoms, wrappers and mess in the rooms for others to clear up.
I'm really struggling to enjoy my playtime, and end up resorting to a private room.
Why cant people have some respect?
Sorry for the long post, but i feel very strongly about this. ( and breathe )
I think this is a trend for people's behaviour in general unfortunately x"
Agree. |
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