FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Why are people scared of joining swingers clubs ?
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"I prefer to organise my own chaos " but does it work out | |||
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"We like to try any fun along our journey of discovery " . Do clubs work for you guys ? | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" Because we're all different and some of us don't want to. | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" Why were you scared of going to clubs? | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs." LOLWut? Did you leave? I would have. | |||
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"We like both. We went to clubs first, though, as I was nervous about inviting people into my personal space for private meets. But now we enjoy clubs and private meets equally. -Courtney" . Haha you know I'd meet you guys any how | |||
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"I prefer to organise my own chaos but does it work out " Heheh | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting." You can tell you don't have to pay as much as the single men! "hi i just paid £40 for the atmosphere"....never gonna happen! | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting. You can tell you don't have to pay as much as the single men! "hi i just paid £40 for the atmosphere"....never gonna happen! " Its true. Its a great night out for a single woman. However my local club is only £25 for men so not that bad. | |||
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"why don't more people try clubs too ?" How do you know they don't? | |||
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"why don't more people try clubs too ? How do you know they don't?" Quite a few people I have chatted to have told me so - they have house meets but aren't ready to try clubs x | |||
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"We like both. We went to clubs first, though, as I was nervous about inviting people into my personal space for private meets. But now we enjoy clubs and private meets equally. -Courtney. Haha you know I'd meet you guys any how " | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs. LOLWut? Did you leave? I would have. " Yes we did. Never been to a club since. | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs. LOLWut? Did you leave? I would have. Yes we did. Never been to a club since." That's a real shame, from our experience in our local club, everyone is welcome and no-one judges anyone else, you can be comfortable being who you are x | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs. LOLWut? Did you leave? I would have. Yes we did. Never been to a club since. That's a real shame, from our experience in our local club, everyone is welcome and no-one judges anyone else, you can be comfortable being who you are x" I think the point is (as has been illustrated here) not everyone's experience is the same. | |||
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"I fancy trying one, if only once. As a single guy, I'd worry that people would automatically assume I'm a horny, pushy knob-head, who'd shag anything with a pulse - lol Would prefer to go with someone else, if only for conversation." If you were polite and respectful, i'm pretty sure you would get on fine | |||
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"We prefer clubs to private meets too. For us it's a good night out, interesting people to talk to, fun things to see, you never quite know what you're going to see. Some people seem to think that of you go to clubs, you always have sex with loads of people. We don't play with others all the time, we go to have fun with each other but in public. Other times we do play with others but it's not necessary. We treat it like a sexy club / spa, it has music, but also Jacuzzis, steam rooms, saunas and a fun mix of people. I like private parties too, I just prefer to be in a busier environment " Agreed | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" too expensive for me plus I want more than attraction ,as a,guy you don't go to a club regularly to socialise unless your wealthy so guys mostly go for the obvious and mostly don't get it but the clubs exist because so many guys go ,if they made the cost acceptable I might go with a friend | |||
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"I guess clubs are more geared towards couples and women, whilst we men pay to much to get and don't get as much fun, recon that is one reason lol." Guys often pay a little more yes, but, I know a lot of single guys that have their fair share of fun - having the right attitude reaps rewards x | |||
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"I've been to clubs, quite like them but by far and away prefer the freedom of arranging my own meets away from the restrictions of a club...they're just an odd little extra for me " You seem to do pretty well without the club scene x | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs. LOLWut? Did you leave? I would have. Yes we did. Never been to a club since. That's a real shame, from our experience in our local club, everyone is welcome and no-one judges anyone else, you can be comfortable being who you are x I think the point is (as has been illustrated here) not everyone's experience is the same." Every visit to a club is a different experience, luckily, we haven't had any bad ones x | |||
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"I've been to clubs, quite like them but by far and away prefer the freedom of arranging my own meets away from the restrictions of a club...they're just an odd little extra for me You seem to do pretty well without the club scene x " I'm happy with my place here | |||
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"I fancy trying one, if only once. As a single guy, I'd worry that people would automatically assume I'm a horny, pushy knob-head, who'd shag anything with a pulse - lol Would prefer to go with someone else, if only for conversation." In a club environment men aren't frowned on. You'd have to behave like a right ****** It does seem men get the rough end on here but in rl the couples/womem that have the attitude against single men only attend couples only nights, leaving mixed nights, relaxed, mischievous fun | |||
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"It just seems a lot less hassle to go to a club for me than trying to arrange anything in advance. Doesn't matter if I play or not, I still have a good night out and if anything develops it's a bonus x" I find the exact oposite. Arranging stuff isn't very hard nor are short notice meets. But a club is turn up get gouged for a 100+ membership then probably 50+ for the night, maybe not fancy anyone and if you do fancy them they may not be playing. They're fun with a partner as a change but going as a single bloke is expensive and a lot of hassle. | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.." I completely disagree - I have had some great fun in clubs with some very attractive women that I would be punching well above my weight to have fun with I even dated a couple | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" I wouldn't say I was scared, apprehensive would be a better word. All I see on the forums is "go to a club to meet people". Usually followed by horror stories around people's experiences with the staff or members. As a single man I'm not sure i'd be wholly comfortable walking in to a strange venue, full of strangers on my own. I feel the same way around pubs and bars too. Having read a few horror stories I'd hate to be pigeonholed or viewed as "one of those guys". On the flip side, clubs are on my "to do" list. | |||
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"Some people just feel nervous, what if they feel they be a wallflower, standing around nobody talking to them some have expectations they have to play and there be sex going on in every corner Scared of the embarrassment of getting rejected thinking clubs maybe clicky and they won't be accepted Etc ect All I say to these is go with the attitude your going to a club to meet likeminded people, with no expectations of play and see how things go. check out the club website to be familiar with rules and surroundings and choose to go on a fab social, an event to your taste like mine as you have the support of someone to show you around and go over rules and some little hints how to connect with people, what you may think is people being clicky is usually people that only just met that night so for those who haven't tried go for it as the social side is great let alone if you play " These...... Some people just feel nervous, what if they feel they be a wallflower, standing around nobody talking to them some have expectations they have to play and there be sex going on in every corner Scared of the embarrassment of getting rejected thinking clubs maybe clicky and they won't be accepted. I'd say these are pretty common "conditions". | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting." me too, . The social aspect is brill! .. | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting." me too, . The social aspect is brill! .. | |||
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"Some people just feel nervous, what if they feel they be a wallflower, standing around nobody talking to them some have expectations they have to play and there be sex going on in every corner Scared of the embarrassment of getting rejected thinking clubs maybe clicky and they won't be accepted Etc ect All I say to these is go with the attitude your going to a club to meet likeminded people, with no expectations of play and see how things go. check out the club website to be familiar with rules and surroundings and choose to go on a fab social, an event to your taste like mine as you have the support of someone to show you around and go over rules and some little hints how to connect with people, what you may think is people being clicky is usually people that only just met that night so for those who haven't tried go for it as the social side is great let alone if you play These...... Some people just feel nervous, what if they feel they be a wallflower, standing around nobody talking to them some have expectations they have to play and there be sex going on in every corner Scared of the embarrassment of getting rejected thinking clubs maybe clicky and they won't be accepted. I'd say these are pretty common "conditions". " There was quite a few people like this at the club I went to. There was one guy there himself and he stayed out the playrooms just walking about from room to room. He would try jump into open conversations but it never came to much. So we started chatting to him one thing lead to another and I ended up playing with him. It's always worth going along at least once to see for yourself what it's like. Might not be for everyone but at least you will know if it's for you or not xxxx | |||
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"I don't go simply because get nervous and suffer anxiety in groups of people and trust me panic attacks aren't fun or fun to watch . Debs x" My son used to have this problem, thankfully he's doing ok now but I can totally understand how you must feel regarding these k8nd of situations xxxx | |||
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"I don't go simply because get nervous and suffer anxiety in groups of people and trust me panic attacks aren't fun or fun to watch . Debs x My son used to have this problem, thankfully he's doing ok now but I can totally understand how you must feel regarding these k8nd of situations xxxx" Thank you ,glad your son's okay now .have been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and social anxiety, learning to cope xx | |||
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"I I get really shy n nervous around groups of people I don't know I hate crowds I get all panicky " Your not alone feeling like that .hope your ok x | |||
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"I don't go simply because get nervous and suffer anxiety in groups of people and trust me panic attacks aren't fun or fun to watch . Debs x My son used to have this problem, thankfully he's doing ok now but I can totally understand how you must feel regarding these k8nd of situations xxxx Thank you ,glad your son's okay now .have been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and social anxiety, learning to cope xx" G.A.D is what he was diagnosed with. But by putting him in the right social circumstances and taekwando has really brought him out his shell. To early to say if he's over it yet but he's faced all his fears I'm very proud of him. Hope you find something that helps you soon xxxxx | |||
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"I don't go simply because get nervous and suffer anxiety in groups of people and trust me panic attacks aren't fun or fun to watch . Debs x My son used to have this problem, thankfully he's doing ok now but I can totally understand how you must feel regarding these k8nd of situations xxxx Thank you ,glad your son's okay now .have been diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and social anxiety, learning to cope xx G.A.D is what he was diagnosed with. But by putting him in the right social circumstances and taekwando has really brought him out his shell. To early to say if he's over it yet but he's faced all his fears I'm very proud of him. Hope you find something that helps you soon xxxxx" Thank you xx | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " Maybe you should try Liberty Elite as it only allows the most aesthetically pleasing entrance as you obviously are | |||
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"its great when you go and a neighbour off the same street you live on is there. even better when a family member attends them. " Never happened to me my nearest club is 45 min drive in stanley Durham so I've never seen anyone I know in there lol | |||
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"its great when you go and a neighbour off the same street you live on is there. even better when a family member attends them. Never happened to me my nearest club is 45 min drive in stanley Durham so I've never seen anyone I know in there lol" i went to a club and all fun in the orgy room. went to sayers few days later and the woman i fucked served me a pasty | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " See you there on Saturday then? | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.." We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox. | |||
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"I get that everyone is different, and has thier own expectations etc, each to their own. I was scared as I didn't have any idea of what to expect and I was really shy lol. " Same....not into the whole group thing either..too many expectations even though so many will argue otherwise ( read forums for expectations arguments). If I want to socialise I'll go to a nice pub. I went to one was shocked at the single male entrance fee £45 (I hadn't realised)...I didn't entre as a result and never bothered since. It's an expensive night with drinks and travel. Have found organising fab meets easier and less intimidating. Just not for me. | |||
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"I'm not scared of clubs but after one visit to one i realised the men who go there just aren't my type. I should have figured out that any man who can afford an entrance fee isn't really a great filter system but hey ho! Lesson learned! " | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.." Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? | |||
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"I really enjoy clubs, although it took a massive amount of courage when I first went to one without my partner in crime. They are now by far and away my preferred place to meet, chat, flirt and who knows. Hoping to be going to one of my absolute faves on Saturday night. " Hopefully your favourite club begins with an A :p | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " Where are you snatching these prices from oh knowledgeable one? Times I've been to a club have always been cheaper than the average night out. You been to one or you going on hearsay? If it's hearsay...your opinion means squat all | |||
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"I'm not scared of going! I want to go and I'm a fairly confident person but just reading some of the comments in this thread and other threads similar puts me off ....... And probably a lot of other single females, which might explain the ratio of men to women? I don't know who to believe and what clubs are more suited to a single female first timer ???? # I don't need a chaperone or advice from someone whose never been to a club or went once 10yrs ago lol BUT genuine advice from regulars would be great X. " Clubs are fine, go in, make yourself known as a newbie to the staff and they tend to watch out for you... Maybe buddy up with a fellow lady on there. There's no pressure to fuck, just be there and enjoy.. I quite like hanging about the bar/social spaces and having a natter. Once your in the nerves soon settle | |||
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"I'm not scared of going! I want to go and I'm a fairly confident person but just reading some of the comments in this thread and other threads similar puts me off ....... And probably a lot of other single females, which might explain the ratio of men to women? I don't know who to believe and what clubs are more suited to a single female first timer ???? # I don't need a chaperone or advice from someone whose never been to a club or went once 10yrs ago lol BUT genuine advice from regulars would be great X. Clubs are fine, go in, make yourself known as a newbie to the staff and they tend to watch out for you... Maybe buddy up with a fellow lady on there. There's no pressure to fuck, just be there and enjoy.. I quite like hanging about the bar/social spaces and having a natter. Once your in the nerves soon settle " Thanks | |||
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"Agree with this entirely. Xtasia is our club of choice and have always felt it to be a very safe and relaxed place to explore our boundaries. The club and social vibe appeals as much to us as the prospect of 'play' but often one leads to another! " Thanks I'm going to have a look at website xx | |||
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"i went to a club and all fun in the orgy room. went to sayers few days later and the woman i fucked served me a pasty " Fucked and Fed, that constitutes marriage in many cultures | |||
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"I'm not scared of going! I want to go and I'm a fairly confident person but just reading some of the comments in this thread and other threads similar puts me off ....... And probably a lot of other single females, which might explain the ratio of men to women? I don't know who to believe and what clubs are more suited to a single female first timer ???? # I don't need a chaperone or advice from someone whose never been to a club or went once 10yrs ago lol BUT genuine advice from regulars would be great X. Clubs are fine, go in, make yourself known as a newbie to the staff and they tend to watch out for you... Maybe buddy up with a fellow lady on there. There's no pressure to fuck, just be there and enjoy.. I quite like hanging about the bar/social spaces and having a natter. Once your in the nerves soon settle Thanks " No worries, don't listen to the haters, half of them haven't got the gall to go figure it out for themselves and tend just to recycle some crap they once heard off a mate who went one time... Might be worth chatting to some folk locally who go and get more advice specific to the clubs in your area. Ask but there's no substitute for actually going | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox." | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? " have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... " Same, I've spent far more in towns pubs and restaurants etc than at a club....they're a relatively cheap night I always thought. I think people who already have the notion that they don't like something tend to cling onto the negative reinforcement that they hear and like repeating it as part of their own argument...again, just recycled rumour and hearsay with no actual experience :/ that's how it strikes me anyhow | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " club groupie yep thats me as I was a single woman who ventured clubs alone for 3yrs and no I'm not on the payroll . I actually enjoy bringing people together and clubs are alot about the social aspect too surprisingly, alot of single fems like to dance, flirt and chat before going off for sex single fems dont sit in a row for a man to go up to them and say want to fuck a slight exagiration of the fees and I have to pay the same as a single man, as a couple now at my club if I go to a different night as a couple | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox." Hi.. I was not for one minute suggesting that everyone who attends clubs is a con artist/on the payroll/have ulterior motives. That would be ridiculous. I am sure there are plenty of people who go for whatever reasons. I am unclear as to what the reasons might be but it isnt any of my business. I do stand by what i say though in that all is not what it seems when it comes to the enticement of single males to clubs by secret employees. | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... " Cupids 75 quid 12 month membership plus 25 quid on the door each visit for single males. Ab fab only 10 quid membership but 60 quid on the door each visit. Chams doesn't display fees for single males so guessing it's couples only. Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently) They're just the club's I could remember the names of off the top of my head :p. It's a fair amount of faff. This is why I tend to only go to kage at partners, simple 10 quid entry packed and a bit more interesting than the normal nights. | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " Sorry - not an employee or paid by the club. Just love shagging with a big audience but on a bed rather than the backseat of a car. FWIW the good clubs I've been to, I'd happily pay £50 a night if they charged me that. Never been to one that charges guys £100 though. | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort." #NotAllClubs I can think of one that certainly does, I can't think of any others. | |||
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"I have a friend whos former partner was an escort. She worked at several clubs." Course you did. Did she tell you that herself or did he tell you that? | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort." so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox." nearest club to me £70 to get in and chams is over £100 | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox.nearest club to me £70 to get in and chams is over £100 " No... it doesn't cost that much to get it. It costs that much the first time to pay for your membership AND your entrance fee. The second time, it doesn't cost that much. | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting." | |||
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" FWIW the good clubs I've been to, I'd happily pay £50 a night if they charged me that." Of course you would...you'd be getting your money's worth and you don't have to pay that.....but most guys wouldn't get the same attention as you would. That's the reality and that's why many don't see the same as you on the value aspect. Some don't liked being watched while shagging. If they charged the same for everyone I think there would be less people go...also there wouldn't be near as many females which in turn would have a knock on effect over a few weeks and months. | |||
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"Most single guys prefer to wank at home to free porn. No need to spend 25 - 100 dollars for something you can get for free " there 100s of guys go to clubs | |||
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"Most single guys prefer to wank at home to free porn. No need to spend 25 - 100 dollars for something you can get for free there 100s of guys go to clubs " Yes , and I suppose some men do better than others in these clubs. But from reading numerous post about single men just standing around or following couples wanking in clubs. I made my comment | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... Cupids 75 quid 12 month membership plus 25 quid on the door each visit for single males. Ab fab only 10 quid membership but 60 quid on the door each visit. Chams doesn't display fees for single males so guessing it's couples only. Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently) They're just the club's I could remember the names of off the top of my head :p. It's a fair amount of faff. This is why I tend to only go to kage at partners, simple 10 quid entry packed and a bit more interesting than the normal nights." The first time I went to Cupids was a Thursday afternoon, £40 for none members, member rate was £15. Before I left I made myself a member for 6 months which was £50. On making myself a member my admission fee for that day was then dropped to £15. So £50 + £15 = £65, id already paid £40 so membership was only an extra £25. I returned to the club on Saturday night, £25 instead of the non member price of £50 saving me the £25 extra that if paid for membership. 2 nights in a club for £90. Really can't understand why guys don't make themselves members if they are going to go more than twice in 6 months DISCLAIMER. The prices quoted were May 2014 and as such may be different now | |||
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"Most single guys prefer to wank at home to free porn. No need to spend 25 - 100 dollars for something you can get for free there 100s of guys go to clubs Yes , and I suppose some men do better than others in these clubs. But from reading numerous post about single men just standing around or following couples wanking in clubs. I made my comment " yes your right there most guys wait to you go in the room then tyre jumping in lol but you do get some where they will come and chat with you you just have to take the good and the bad lol | |||
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"Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently)." Well at least you managed to get some of the info in that part of you post correct. Townhouse don't charge anyone membership fees though yes single guys do have to go on a Wednesday evening for an induction the£20 is for their entry that night, not membership. No it isn't £30 entry for single males every night after that either. Weds nights are £20 , some other eve and daytime events are as little as £10 and only Sat nights are £30 and the reason single males have to book on a Sat night is single male places are limited to 8. There are plenty of clubs all over the country that don't charge membership or are reasonably priced for single males. There are also loads of socials and parties in clubs where you don't need to be a member just be on the guest list. These are great ways to check out clubs to see if they are worth a repeat visit. The main thing is to check out club wrbsites and also posts in the events section on here to find the cheapest ways to attend clubs. Do you research and you can find plenty of bargain nights in clubs, I know I do | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort." remeber 1 which was cpls only but opened for a cpl of friday nights as mixed and had escorts (who worked there thru day) stop over cpl of hours the friday only lasted cpl of weeks then went back to normal | |||
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"Just for balance: La Chambre in Sheffield charges £25 per year for membership and £25 entry. The Attic in Derby has no annual Membership and Charges £20 to get in. The brand spanking new Quest in Leeds is £20 to get in, I'm not sure about membership but I think it's free. And... Club F Durham is £20 for membership plus £20 entry on Friday or £35 on Saturday All of these prices, the membership is the same as couples and the entry is within £10 of what couples pay. Cal I been told lachambre is closing in the near future it been sold to Sheffield council Sad loss " . NO | |||
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"Just for balance: La Chambre in Sheffield charges £25 per year for membership and £25 entry. The Attic in Derby has no annual Membership and Charges £20 to get in. The brand spanking new Quest in Leeds is £20 to get in, I'm not sure about membership but I think it's free. And... Club F Durham is £20 for membership plus £20 entry on Friday or £35 on Saturday All of these prices, the membership is the same as couples and the entry is within £10 of what couples pay. Cal I been told lachambre is closing in the near future it been sold to Sheffield council Sad loss " Yay, one club in the whole of Yorkshire after that then. | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort.remeber 1 which was cpls only but opened for a cpl of friday nights as mixed and had escorts (who worked there thru day) stop over cpl of hours the friday only lasted cpl of weeks then went back to normal" I have to say, we've now been to 8 or 9 clubs and have never seen any evidence of escorts of prostitutes. On the contrary, the management make it quite clear that there are NEVER any guarantees of sex. Cal | |||
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"This started off by asking why single guys don't go and kinda got hijacked by the pro clubbers correcting them. Maybe a post should be started for the pro clubbers asking why do you go to socials...some only exclusively to and will not meet outside a social. Those who want to tell others their reasuggesting ein really valid can still go. The fact remains single men pay over the odds for the privaledge to get to go and quite often sit/stand and watch or chat maybe engage in sexual activity where as a single female or couple are 99% guaranteed to. So im suggesting those pro socials listen and start another pro social post where those who don't go for many reasons can read what you guys say about it.... what about that? I think you might persuade more to venture that way." Nope, I the Op was just asking why in general people (any people, single or couples were scared of going to clubs). x | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" Some people are the exact opposite tho | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ? Some people are the exact opposite tho" I respect that, just not something that I am comfy with - my hubby isn't into the lifestyle - but I like him under the same roof - he doesn't want to watch, but is ok socialising whilst i'm away playing x | |||
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"Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently). Well at least you managed to get some of the info in that part of you post correct. Townhouse don't charge anyone membership fees though yes single guys do have to go on a Wednesday evening for an induction the£20 is for their entry that night, not membership. No it isn't £30 entry for single males every night after that either. Weds nights are £20 , some other eve and daytime events are as little as £10 and only Sat nights are £30 and the reason single males have to book on a Sat night is single male places are limited to 8. There are plenty of clubs all over the country that don't charge membership or are reasonably priced for single males. There are also loads of socials and parties in clubs where you don't need to be a member just be on the guest list. These are great ways to check out clubs to see if they are worth a repeat visit. The main thing is to check out club wrbsites and also posts in the events section on here to find the cheapest ways to attend clubs. Do you research and you can find plenty of bargain nights in clubs, I know I do " This is a perfect example of bending what you read to suit your own jaded argument. Townhouse DO NOT CHARGE MEMBERSHP FEES!!!!! If you had looked at the website like we ask everyone to do, it states this very clearly in big letters. Entry for guys is as little as £5 on some Thursdays, £10 for others great events and as Lee has said only £30 on a saturday. Yes, we do not allow guys in together for a bloody good reason and it works. The guys who get why, read the website and turn up for the intro to get their free membership don't seem to have a problem with this. This is exactly why we do the intro evening...to out those who don't 'get it' and we like guys who do their homework on the club and show some initiative. Guys need to invest time and effort into meeting ladies/couples in clubs and this starts before they even step through the door. Love Townhouse xx | |||
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"This thread has been a great read, thanks OP for starting it and for those who have been honest. It's good for us to know who our potential guests are and why some steer clear of clubs, which I totally get. It helps us direct our events and marketing towards those who are nervous about clubs, to reassure them that most clubs have a night for everyone. xxxx PS I can't bloody believe the BBW comment further up by the way!!!! WTF?!!! " | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs." Not all clubs are like that. As a club owner I would never permit that to happen (we have BBW, Bountiful Beautiful Ladies). Our club reviews and personal messages all confirm that. Please do not let that put you off clubs, one person does not speak for the many, at all. | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. See you there on Saturday then? " haha | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... Cupids 75 quid 12 month membership plus 25 quid on the door each visit for single males. Ab fab only 10 quid membership but 60 quid on the door each visit. Chams doesn't display fees for single males so guessing it's couples only. Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently) They're just the club's I could remember the names of off the top of my head :p. It's a fair amount of faff. This is why I tend to only go to kage at partners, simple 10 quid entry packed and a bit more interesting than the normal nights." WOW So much information seeming designed to 'dis' clubs (I now fully understand dis-information... Club owners (like myself @ The GateHouse), club staff and their patrons are rightly correcting some outrageous claims of costs. As has been highly recommended go the the club websites for information, simples. We have a brand new website, nigh on all the clubs have a website. We are all in the business of facilitating like minded consenting adults, who enjoy the pleasures of pleasure, safe havens to be able to do that in different social surroundings. The prices some have quoted as minimum spends are !!! There is no membership fee @ The GateHouse. Confirmed and Verified Membership on Fabswingers is however one of our checks and balances. At The GateHouse over half our events are only £ 10 for a male. Friday/Saturday for 'event' nights it 'jumps' to £ 20. You bring your own alcohol (we charge for mixers and tea and coffee), towels/shower gel/condoms/lube are free and a returnable £ 5 deposit for a locker. So for £ 15 - £20 that is entry and the drinks you bought and brought in for over half our events. £25 - £30 for the Friday/Saturday night 'events for the same. We also pay your taxi back to the local hotel (a Travelodge). Not quite £ 100... Check out my new website, it's all there. Check out the club websites in your locality. Get yourselves correctly informed and then happily get on with enjoying the pleasures of pleasure. The GateHouse Dee x | |||
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"I've tried two clubs. Both were unpleasant, seedy experiences. I recall the manager of one of them saying to my partner (who was a BBW) 'We have Big Girls parties every Wednesday' and turning to me and saying 'but don't worry, normal people come as well'. Put me right off clubs." What a dick! | |||
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"We prefer clubs to private meets too. For us it's a good night out, interesting people to talk to, fun things to see, you never quite know what you're going to see. Some people seem to think that of you go to clubs, you always have sex with loads of people. We don't play with others all the time, we go to have fun with each other but in public. Other times we do play with others but it's not necessary. We treat it like a sexy club / spa, it has music, but also Jacuzzis, steam rooms, saunas and a fun mix of people. I like private parties too, I just prefer to be in a busier environment " I'm very much the same P.s. Sorry to not give more to this thread OP, its got such long comments I've given up reading it all haha | |||
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"We were complete novices to the swinging scene and after chickening out a few times decided to join a local club. We had no idea what to expect, but kicked ourselves after our first visit. Each visit was a totally different experience and a huge learning curve. Baby steps were the way to go. My (Kez - John doesn't swing - he just socialises) confidence has grown and i'm very comfortable in the club environment and feel very safe. I'm not comfortable with home meets as it make me anxious - why don't more people try clubs too ?" A bit like you two - we are a couple with one of us being active playing, the other mainly socialising and watching - swingers clubs over us a safe place, sexy atmosphere and we find there is always something interesting to join in with, watch or interesting people to talk to. Once through the club door we can leave our daily responsibilities and concerns aside for a short time - perfect escapism! Meeting at home or hotel has turned out to be far less interesting in our experience. Of course in clubs we see people we don't want to play with but we just decline politely. We have only had one experience of poor etiquette in 9 months of visiting swinging clubs. You are wondering why more people don't try clubs? I think they some might be married and not have permission so worried about being recognised, some might be nervous of going on their own and might not have anyone to arrive with, some might have a poor impression of what a club will actually be like. Before we actually went we thought it would be seedy and we thought we would be too embarrassed to enjoy ourselves - the reality was totally different thank goodness. Thanks to the friendliness and open-mindex attitudes of the staff and the attendees I can recommend swingers clubs to anyone on fabs. Happy to answer a polite private message too about any clubs I have visited if any newbie wants more details. | |||
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"The reason why im scared is because im young and i feel like ill be judged if i go in" Well the reason I was scared to go in first time was - I am old! And scared I would be judged! But the people were friendly, not judgemenal at all - some people play with younger or older swingers, some people have a particular body type preference, some people like to chat or watch - every club visit is different because of different people and different play. If you never try you are missing out on a very liberating experience. M x | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort." I have seen that once only - but there are lots of genuine swinging men and ladies and couples - by sitting and talking to people and also arranging meets through fab friends you can avoid escorts so why let their presence bother you? | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " You are entitled to your own opinion. My experience is very different to yours therefore my opinion is very different. Human nature is such that if we like something alot we want others to know about it and like it too.....it is very cynical and inaccurate of you to suggest that someone sharing their positive experiences on here would be a paid employee of the club. | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox.nearest club to me £70 to get in and chams is over £100 No... it doesn't cost that much to get it. It costs that much the first time to pay for your membership AND your entrance fee. The second time, it doesn't cost that much." So yes it costs that much to get in. The fact it's cheaper the second time does not change the cost of that first time (and assumes there's going to be a second time) | |||
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"No... it doesn't cost that much to get it. It costs that much the first time to pay for your membership AND your entrance fee. The second time, it doesn't cost that much. So yes it costs that much to get in. The fact it's cheaper the second time does not change the cost of that first time (and assumes there's going to be a second time)" Depends how you see it really. I've paid £100 the first time for a couple of fetish clubs (membership and entrance fee) and then I've been a couple more times over the year, so I see it as costing £50 each time, rather than £40 entry + £60 membership the first time. Sure, if you don't think it's going to be your kind of thing then it seems like alot of money up front. However on the other hand, it does put off the 'sex tourists' who are just having a go to see if they fancy it and haven't spent any time socialising on the scene yet. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. I still don't feel like £50 a night is too much to pay for a great club night. Because I *do* pay that kind of money, as a single woman, for fetish clubs. | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. Funny that is... Club nights for me have always been a comparatively cheap night out, never seen this hundred pound membership of which you speak? More fool anyone who pays that What club are you talking about specifically or are you just snatching numbers out of thin air? Never know such an environment on one either...they've never been like that when I've been there? Are you talking from experience or just hear say through one friends experience? have to say i have never heard the 100 pound figure either... I think people use this perceived cost in their heads as an excuse I would probably spend more on a saturday night in a city centre than i would on a saturday night going to a club...... Cupids 75 quid 12 month membership plus 25 quid on the door each visit for single males. Ab fab only 10 quid membership but 60 quid on the door each visit. Chams doesn't display fees for single males so guessing it's couples only. Townhouse, you must book and attend an interview on a Wednesday social night and remain in the club from 8:30pm till midnight, then 20 quid for membership followed by 30 quid entrance each visit (but must book places in advance) oh and you are not slowed to join with a friend or attend with another male friend (2 guys together who know each other are a "pack apprently) They're just the club's I could remember the names of off the top of my head :p. It's a fair amount of faff. This is why I tend to only go to kage at partners, simple 10 quid entry packed and a bit more interesting than the normal nights." Thanks for the info. Why would i have to pay an entrance fee/membership at all? There are lots of clubs/bars/societies in big cities such as manchester where i can go in totally free of charge or certainly for much less. | |||
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"Thanks for the info. Why would i have to pay an entrance fee/membership at all? There are lots of clubs/bars/societies in big cities such as manchester where i can go in totally free of charge or certainly for much less." Are they swingers clubs? | |||
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"Thanks for the info. Why would i have to pay an entrance fee/membership at all? There are lots of clubs/bars/societies in big cities such as manchester where i can go in totally free of charge or certainly for much less. Are they swingers clubs?" Well i guess we are getting to the crux of the matter here. Perhaps i really dont understand the club/swinging scene and thats why i dont go to clubs. We have read a lot on this thread about prices but we know that most clubs let females in for free or cheap as they do with couples. They are the honey for the wasps. Without them there would be no wasps. If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. In a club, the reason why many males are there i suspect is the chance of impromptu sexual liasons and thats why they are willing to pay. They are being sold a myth which comes true only for the chosen few. The rest are merely frustrated bystanders and spectators who probably leave feeling frustrated and with slightly dented self esteem. Even worse if they tried their luck and were rebuffed. Someone else noted that the thread is full of club owners/females and couples springing to defend them. Who can blame them for it is all to their advantage. Some make good money out of it, some benefit greatly with all the admiration, positive strokes and general feeling of being desired that they get there., A kind of power trip and a great confidence boost..who wouldnt want that? But as i say, ive never been to one so im probably talking carp. | |||
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"If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. " There are swingers in swingers clubs. I don't know about you, but I think randomly walking up to women and couples in mainstream bars and saying 'Are you into gangbangs and moresomes?' would quite quickly get you punched. If you're just looking for wining and dining and single women then yeah, maybe clubs are better for you. But if you're into anything other than just one to one, casual sex then you might find what you're looking for in a swingers clubs. Because there are swingers there. | |||
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"If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. There are swingers in swingers clubs. I don't know about you, but I think randomly walking up to women and couples in mainstream bars and saying 'Are you into gangbangs and moresomes?' would quite quickly get you punched. If you're just looking for wining and dining and single women then yeah, maybe clubs are better for you. But if you're into anything other than just one to one, casual sex then you might find what you're looking for in a swingers clubs. Because there are swingers there." Also, shagging in the middle of a nightclub is likely to get you thrown out, or possibly arrested. You can do that in a swingers club. | |||
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"If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. There are swingers in swingers clubs. I don't know about you, but I think randomly walking up to women and couples in mainstream bars and saying 'Are you into gangbangs and moresomes?' would quite quickly get you punched. If you're just looking for wining and dining and single women then yeah, maybe clubs are better for you. But if you're into anything other than just one to one, casual sex then you might find what you're looking for in a swingers clubs. Because there are swingers there." I agree and of course such approaches in normal social settings would be totally inappropriate. So what are we left with? A male potentially paying a membership/entrance fee to a swingers club which is more than is charged to females/couples. They then hang around in the hope of being invited to engage in a sexual d'alliance. Take the same money, look up and escort and you definitely will have a sexual liason, it will happen when you want it and without the hanging around for hours making small talk and perhaps feeling disappointed and demeaned as you make your way home in the early hours. | |||
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"If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. There are swingers in swingers clubs. I don't know about you, but I think randomly walking up to women and couples in mainstream bars and saying 'Are you into gangbangs and moresomes?' would quite quickly get you punched. If you're just looking for wining and dining and single women then yeah, maybe clubs are better for you. But if you're into anything other than just one to one, casual sex then you might find what you're looking for in a swingers clubs. Because there are swingers there. I agree and of course such approaches in normal social settings would be totally inappropriate. So what are we left with? A male potentially paying a membership/entrance fee to a swingers club which is more than is charged to females/couples. They then hang around in the hope of being invited to engage in a sexual d'alliance. Take the same money, look up and escort and you definitely will have a sexual liason, it will happen when you want it and without the hanging around for hours making small talk and perhaps feeling disappointed and demeaned as you make your way home in the early hours." You know, I pay for sex sometimes with men (and have paid for women before). But I will confidently say to you that it's an entirely different dynamic to what you find in a swingers club. I sometimes go to clubs (mostly fetish/swing crossovers) presenting as male, so I get a bit what it's like to be on both sides. In my experience, it's not about single men sitting around and waiting for a woman to chat to them. People hang out, chat, socialise. It's nice. And then someone might say 'would you like to play?' and then you either say yes or no, or you chat a bit more. Paying for sex with a hooker is different. It's much more clinical. Even the guys who offer 'boyfriend type experiences' that I've been with aren't anything like being at a swingers club. A swingers/fet club is much more like a house party when you were a teenager and you were basically horny and wanted to shag all your mates. Lots more opportunity for group interaction, different experiences, etc. But from your posts and your profile it *does* look like you're more interested just in one on ones, so it's completely understandable that swingers clubs might not be your thing. FWIW I don't agree with men being charged so much more because I think some men do see that as paying for sex, and I don't like that personally. But it's the way things are and it's hard to change that (although the fetish/swing crossover clubs tend to be equal pay for both men and women). | |||
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"Meat market springs to mind. Couldn't be doing with being approached and pestered all the time by guys " Yes..i could see how some women.couples could get a kind of power trip thrill though by being sexually provocative but then denying the horny males all around them and making them watch but not touch. Its almost like a form of psychological BDSM. | |||
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"Meat market springs to mind. Couldn't be doing with being approached and pestered all the time by guys Yes..i could see how some women.couples could get a kind of power trip thrill though by being sexually provocative but then denying the horny males all around them and making them watch but not touch. Its almost like a form of psychological BDSM." I think, to be honest, it sounds like you have a very poor opinion of women who are sexually open. It also sounds from your postings like you believe that paying for entry means you're somehow entitled to sex. Perhaps, all that considered, swingers clubs aren't the best place for you. As you say, it's easier to hire a hooker. | |||
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"We prefer clubs to private meets too. For us it's a good night out, interesting people to talk to, fun things to see, you never quite know what you're going to see. Some people seem to think that of you go to clubs, you always have sex with loads of people. We don't play with others all the time, we go to have fun with each other but in public. Other times we do play with others but it's not necessary. We treat it like a sexy club / spa, it has music, but also Jacuzzis, steam rooms, saunas and a fun mix of people. I like private parties too, I just prefer to be in a busier environment " Spot on, although we are yet to try the private parties! Nervous going to a new club, but always have a great time | |||
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"If i wanted to socialise i could do that anywhere for free so i am struggling to understand why i would pay to socialise in something called a swingers club. What is there that isnt anywhere else? In a social setting i could just as easily meet females. There are swingers in swingers clubs. I don't know about you, but I think randomly walking up to women and couples in mainstream bars and saying 'Are you into gangbangs and moresomes?' would quite quickly get you punched. If you're just looking for wining and dining and single women then yeah, maybe clubs are better for you. But if you're into anything other than just one to one, casual sex then you might find what you're looking for in a swingers clubs. Because there are swingers there. I agree and of course such approaches in normal social settings would be totally inappropriate. So what are we left with? A male potentially paying a membership/entrance fee to a swingers club which is more than is charged to females/couples. They then hang around in the hope of being invited to engage in a sexual d'alliance. Take the same money, look up and escort and you definitely will have a sexual liason, it will happen when you want it and without the hanging around for hours making small talk and perhaps feeling disappointed and demeaned as you make your way home in the early hours. You know, I pay for sex sometimes with men (and have paid for women before). But I will confidently say to you that it's an entirely different dynamic to what you find in a swingers club. I sometimes go to clubs (mostly fetish/swing crossovers) presenting as male, so I get a bit what it's like to be on both sides. In my experience, it's not about single men sitting around and waiting for a woman to chat to them. People hang out, chat, socialise. It's nice. And then someone might say 'would you like to play?' and then you either say yes or no, or you chat a bit more. Paying for sex with a hooker is different. It's much more clinical. Even the guys who offer 'boyfriend type experiences' that I've been with aren't anything like being at a swingers club. A swingers/fet club is much more like a house party when you were a teenager and you were basically horny and wanted to shag all your mates. Lots more opportunity for group interaction, different experiences, etc. But from your posts and your profile it *does* look like you're more interested just in one on ones, so it's completely understandable that swingers clubs might not be your thing. FWIW I don't agree with men being charged so much more because I think some men do see that as paying for sex, and I don't like that personally. But it's the way things are and it's hard to change that (although the fetish/swing crossover clubs tend to be equal pay for both men and women)." Well thank you for the further explanation and i shall give it some further thought. I guess though that you may be right in that im probably a bit more of a one to one kind of guy or at most a couples swap/mmf type. I guess im a bit traditional. | |||
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"Meat market springs to mind. Couldn't be doing with being approached and pestered all the time by guys Yes..i could see how some women.couples could get a kind of power trip thrill though by being sexually provocative but then denying the horny males all around them and making them watch but not touch. Its almost like a form of psychological BDSM. I think, to be honest, it sounds like you have a very poor opinion of women who are sexually open. It also sounds from your postings like you believe that paying for entry means you're somehow entitled to sex. Perhaps, all that considered, swingers clubs aren't the best place for you. As you say, it's easier to hire a hooker." (The "meat market" comment isnt mine) I wouldnt say i have a poor view of women. I think women should feel no shame or stigma in pursuing and satisfying their desires and i agree, swinging clubs are not for me,neither are prostitutes. I have had my fair share of sexual encounters in my life and it isnt something thats big on my hit list any more. | |||
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"I have a friend whos former partner was an escort. She worked at several clubs. Course you did. Did she tell you that herself or did he tell you that?" Both of them as a matter of fact since you asked. | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort. so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! " They frequented several clubs to the best of my knowledge. The question was asked and for me this is why I do not go.Appologies if you don't like the answers. | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort. so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! They frequented several clubs to the best of my knowledge. The question was asked and for me this is why I do not go.Appologies if you don't like the answers." Certainly doesn't apply to all clubs and we've not seen it at any we've been to. There are people on this and escort sites, but one seems to be paid work, the other pleasure! I think you actually need to go to clubs to see what they are like. | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort. so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! They frequented several clubs to the best of my knowledge. The question was asked and for me this is why I do not go.Appologies if you don't like the answers." The club I go to doesn't have escorts working in them you seem to be getting your information from 3 parties. Go to a swingers club yourself and see it for yourself not all clubs have escorts in them | |||
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"I've been to clubs, quite like them but by far and away prefer the freedom of arranging my own meets away from the restrictions of a club...they're just an odd little extra for me " I think clubs make meets less restricting and far more fun than any other kind of meet. Plus if the meet turns out to be crap or dont turn up then theres others there instead | |||
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"I love going to clubs. Sometimes I don't even shag at them, I just love going and chatting." Same here with bells on (nearly Christmas after all! ) | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.." I disagree. | |||
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"These threads are always interesting, just to see the club groupies (paid employees ?) pop up and try convince. Social aspect? Fuck off. And then you get the women who say is great fun- sure mate, cos it's free or dirt cheap for you. Unlike mugs paying 50-100 bucks for a sniff of poonanny. Not only this, but really who wants to have sex in some sweat soaked pimp hole? Surrounded by the aesthetically challenged . Hmm, tres romantique. " I have never been to a club like what you describe. Plus most arnt looking for romance there, just sex, fun and some socialising. | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox." | |||
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"As a male, i wouldnt dream of visiting a club. Why? Because it is my belief that most of them are nothing more than thinly disguised clip joints/brothels. You only have to look on here. The same people regularly post club meets. Why? Because they actually work there/have business relationships with the club. They pitch up on here asking for meets, hook the mug punter in, he has to pay a membership fee/entrance fee so can be £100 lighter before he even gets in the door. He could go pay a decent escort £100 and be sure of an hours worth of good sex rather than winging it in a shared club where he may/may not get some tlc from someone whos escorting days are over or never arrived. A misguided friend of mine went to a club after responding to a meet and ended up sat with a load of middle aged guys. A few of them were wanking to a porno on the telly whilst some fat old girl teased them a bit.. We regularly post club meets. We do not work at, or receive anything from the club, the price for single guys when we go is £10 with no membership. I'm afraid that you, along with many of the guys on this thread that by their own admission don't go to clubs, are talking bollox.nearest club to me £70 to get in and chams is over £100 No... it doesn't cost that much to get it. It costs that much the first time to pay for your membership AND your entrance fee. The second time, it doesn't cost that much." | |||
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"This thread has been a great read, thanks OP for starting it and for those who have been honest. It's good for us to know who our potential guests are and why some steer clear of clubs, which I totally get. It helps us direct our events and marketing towards those who are nervous about clubs, to reassure them that most clubs have a night for everyone. xxxx PS I can't bloody believe the BBW comment further up by the way!!!! WTF?!!! " what exactly was wrong with the comment I made? No swear words in my comments it's my only profile now so I make comments as an ex-single lady who went to clubs alone for 3yrs and also have experience of organising events and have helped people to venture to clubs for there first time and realise problems with nerves etc | |||
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"I've been to clubs, quite like them but by far and away prefer the freedom of arranging my own meets away from the restrictions of a club...they're just an odd little extra for me I think clubs make meets less restricting and far more fun than any other kind of meet. Plus if the meet turns out to be crap or dont turn up then theres others there instead " | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort. so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! They frequented several clubs to the best of my knowledge. The question was asked and for me this is why I do not go.Appologies if you don't like the answers." but you based your answer on not your own experience... but on someone elses... how many clubs do you reckon there are across the country.... lets be conservative and say 50.... so you based your experience on the 3 club who you say do have escorts... me..... I am going to base it on the 47 who don't...... you know.... the vast majority!!!! yes I didn't like your answer because it paint hard working and developed clubs with the same broad brush stroke....... so lets say i want to say all 51 year old men are past it and shit shags.... oh that was based on a sample size of 3..... how would you like that broad brush stroke? | |||
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"I know for a fact that clubs pay escorts to work at them. Probably better to cut out the middle man and go direct to the escort. so name them rather than just implicating all of then with a general statement!!!! They frequented several clubs to the best of my knowledge. The question was asked and for me this is why I do not go.Appologies if you don't like the answers. but you based your answer on not your own experience... but on someone elses... how many clubs do you reckon there are across the country.... lets be conservative and say 50.... so you based your experience on the 3 club who you say do have escorts... me..... I am going to base it on the 47 who don't...... you know.... the vast majority!!!! yes I didn't like your answer because it paint hard working and developed clubs with the same broad brush stroke....... so lets say i want to say all 51 year old men are past it and shit shags.... oh that was based on a sample size of 3..... how would you like that broad brush stroke? " . | |||
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"Clearly I need to stop listening to people who I know personally and have actually worked in and been paid by clubs and instead get my info from randoms on the internet." No one has suggested your information about the clubs you know of is wrong, it's your original suggestion that most, if not all, clubs do this. They certainly don't in our considerable experience so it would be interesting to see which clubs in the UK employ this practice. So which clubs are they, that might help the discussion. Out of 40+ clubs we've been to only 2 in Holland had working girls paid for by the club. I believe there are 2 in the Birmingham area that are known for employing girls but since we haven't been and so it's only hearsay for us we won't name them. Since you are certain of your facts surely you can tell us all which clubs they are. | |||
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"Clearly I need to stop listening to people who I know personally and have actually worked in and been paid by clubs and instead get my info from randoms on the internet." . Yes name and shame them | |||
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