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single men in clubs
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C |
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By *ivnwcplCouple
over a year ago
liverpool |
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C"
Most clubs are open to make money, they get that money from Single Guys, the only club I know that are very selective on who they admit are Townhouse, they even have a special social/meet for these guys before the club opens just to vet them, but any system is fallible and you always get the wrong ones slipping through the net  |
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By *teed99Man
over a year ago
Kettering |
At The Vanilla Alternative on Friday nights, single guys are limited to a maximum of 10 and must book in before attending. Most are regular VA visitors so the club knows they are respectful and know how to behave. When other guys visit, the regulars lead by example and this usually results in a good evening for everyone. With the open play format at VA's, everyone can see everything that is going on so there is no need to follow anyone about in the hope to be invited into a locked room.
Having personally visited on most Friday nights over the past four years, I can honestly say I cannot recall any hostile arguments taking place and, on the odd occasion that a single guy has got a little bit too close, a gentle word has produced the right results. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When I was working, the people who caused us the most issues and would therefore warrant a pre application vetting process are couples"
Yeah i bet there are some nightmare couples too. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?"
I rest my case lol ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C"
just go on the nights where its couples only. that's the simple solution instead of trying to tarnish single men.
from what i hear the couples are the ones dick teasing in the clubs and then turn men away for the thrill. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C
just go on the nights where its couples only. that's the simple solution instead of trying to tarnish single men.
from what i hear the couples are the ones dick teasing in the clubs and then turn men away for the thrill. "
Dick teasing?? Lol did you really put that lol
Why should we stay clear of a night out just because some men cant behave like normal adults lol.
Like i stated we have never had an issue ...but others have. And had there night ruined...is that fair?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ..."
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
"
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jaydees allows limited single guys on a Saturday night, however they have to book in advance I believe, have verifications on here or be recommended by someone they know who goes there. Not had a single issue with any single guy there, they are all pleasant and respectful  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are many clubs that do have couples/single fems only, where single men are not allowed, if couples find single men a problem then why not just go to these nights (I am a couple now when I go clubbing and will be trying these nights myself next year)
As a organiser/host of events at clubs(experience of 5 partys I've hosted now)
Single men are always welcome and have to put up with me showing them around, going through rules/etiquette is very important, shut door policy's so no banging on doors or barging in, chatting/flirting rather than groping, no means no etc etc I find this does work very well and single men do behave respectfully
Single men are very important too in the club scene and that's from a lady that was in the club scene 3years as a single lady.Any men behaving inappropriately you must report to hosts or club staff.A minority of single men don't know good ettiquite,the majority of men I see in clubs do, vetting single males would be hard to do as they may be new to the club scene, what would the criteria of clubs be? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I am absolutely astounded at the lack of etiquette sometimes - good manners is not difficult surely?????
If we chose not to play with a single man we are not dick teasing - just looking for something different to what they are offering.
Some club visits have been great - in fact the majority of our experiences have been very positive - otherwise we wouldn't keep visiting the clubs!
Recently we did have a very uncomfortable club experience- partly our fault because we should have been more outspoken right from the start when a crowd of blokes came too near us - but surely they also should have acted more considerately?
Anyway, we won't let that happen again so we have learnt something valuable about that particular club. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It is a hard one to think about ...as there are guys that do know manners etc...
Some though think because they have paid to get in £20/£30 that they expect to behave how they please.
Ruins it for the good guys out there. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I am absolutely astounded at the lack of etiquette sometimes - good manners is not difficult surely?????
If we chose not to play with a single man we are not dick teasing - just looking for something different to what they are offering.
Some club visits have been great - in fact the majority of our experiences have been very positive - otherwise we wouldn't keep visiting the clubs!
Recently we did have a very uncomfortable club experience- partly our fault because we should have been more outspoken right from the start when a crowd of blokes came too near us - but surely they also should have acted more considerately?
Anyway, we won't let that happen again so we have learnt something valuable about that particular club. "
I agree ...we have seen this...its so off pointing to couples...
Manners cost nothing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
"
Yeah so we prob agree on your main point!
But they are the ones who keep the club going- if wasn't for them, would cost everyone else a lot more no? And let's face it, females don't like spending their own money - so if fems had to spend what guys currently do - wouldn't be long before we're living in a land with no sex/spunk clubs lol.
Guess the cost and real live women is prob why they go a bit robotic inside - but yeah not my scene.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
Yeah so we prob agree on your main point!
But they are the ones who keep the club going- if wasn't for them, would cost everyone else a lot more no? And let's face it, females don't like spending their own money - so if fems had to spend what guys currently do - wouldn't be long before we're living in a land with no sex/spunk clubs lol.
Guess the cost and real live women is prob why they go a bit robotic inside - but yeah not my scene.
"
Bit of a generalisation there 
I'd happily pay to go to a decent club if I went alone and not with my partner. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
Yeah so we prob agree on your main point!
But they are the ones who keep the club going- if wasn't for them, would cost everyone else a lot more no? And let's face it, females don't like spending their own money - so if fems had to spend what guys currently do - wouldn't be long before we're living in a land with no sex/spunk clubs lol.
Guess the cost and real live women is prob why they go a bit robotic inside - but yeah not my scene.
"
I agree ...not your scene |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
Yeah so we prob agree on your main point!
But they are the ones who keep the club going- if wasn't for them, would cost everyone else a lot more no? And let's face it, females don't like spending their own money - so if fems had to spend what guys currently do - wouldn't be long before we're living in a land with no sex/spunk clubs lol.
Guess the cost and real live women is prob why they go a bit robotic inside - but yeah not my scene.
"
it sounds to me that u have never been to a club as you call it a sex/spunk club.They are swingers clubs for likeminded adults
Single fems did not choose the pricing levels so it is not about them not wanting to pay the higher prices. The demand at clubs chose the prices.men pay the prices and still there are more single men not more single ladies.if clubs had more single ladies it would be equal pricing and turning them away like they do single men if too many |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?
I rest my case lol ...
I've never been to a sex club - but feel free to address the actual points made?
Sex club or spunk club ... Im confussed lol.
Single men dont "support" your local club...they go with a view to meeting like minded people.
Some men dont know how to act durring there time at a sex club...hense my opening questions.
"
Some couples don't know how to behave during their time at a sex club.
Some women don't know how to behave during their time at a sex club.
It's not just single men. |
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By *not69Man
over a year ago
PDI until the 18th Nov |
"On the one hand - it's single guys supporting your club- so leave them alone.
On the other hand, it's hard enough going to a pub on your own - so anyone going to a sex club on their own is prob a bit strange.
What else would you expect in spunk clubs?"
Well for a start, a bit of respect |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C"
I don't think single guys should be vetted unless single fems and couples are vetted too. They can cause trouble aswell. Many single guys often behave better than the couples and single fems ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C
I don't think single guys should be vetted unless single fems and couples are vetted too. They can cause trouble aswell. Many single guys often behave better than the couples and single fems !"
Ive never seen packs of couples or women bothering people lol....
Now i know there are bad couples and women too...but some single men seem to excel at losing there manners |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C"
hey look try and be a little more sympathetic to the plight of the single male in a club because if they wernt there you wouldn't have one ,you can be critical when you pay an equal share of the entry fee and NO means NO just say it and mean it          |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C hey look try and be a little more sympathetic to the plight of the single male in a club because if they wernt there you wouldn't have one ,you can be critical when you pay an equal share of the entry fee and NO means NO just say it and mean it "
We can be critical when ever we like ...if single men find the price to high...well... |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
Every time this subject matter comes up, my blood boils.
There is a dedicated couples night in most clubs where single men can't attend. If you don't like single men, go on couples night.
As a fair few people have said on the thread, couples or single women misbehave often!
In my experience couples behave worse than single men, I've been grabbed by the male and female in couples before and they got really pissed off when I told them that i wasn't interested.
Personally I think people need to give single men a break, it's no surprise they are concerned about attending clubs when they all get tarred with this brush.
Again I'm going to say to you couples, YOU get a dedicated night, if you don't like single men, stick to couples night!
It's not rocket science |
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So far we've visited 3 different clubs on about ten occasions.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly single guys and pushy, creepy guys.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly couples and pushy, creepy couples.
There are people who are swingers and there are people who are jerks. The two groups are not mutually exclusive and they do overlap. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the term sex club is not an apt term and this wording is half the problem. Swingers clubs are where like minded adults go to interact with those they choose to. But I think some single guys (not all) think of it more as a sex club not a swingers club and seem to expect sex because they have paid for admission. Regardless of what you may or may not have paid to get in no one should expect sex because of it. More that they have paid to enter a club where like minded adults will be and they then have the opportunity to meet, chat and maybe ultimately play with said people. The comments that single guys make about them keeping the clubs going because they pay a higher entrance fee is laughable at best and deluded at worst. Guys like that may be better visiting a brothel, for it seems they enter these clubs with that mindset. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So far we've visited 3 different clubs on about ten occasions.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly single guys and pushy, creepy guys.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly couples and pushy, creepy couples.
There are people who are swingers and there are people who are jerks. The two groups are not mutually exclusive and they do overlap. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So far we've visited 3 different clubs on about ten occasions.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly single guys and pushy, creepy guys.
In each one, there have been nice, friendly couples and pushy, creepy couples.
There are people who are swingers and there are people who are jerks. The two groups are not mutually exclusive and they do overlap.
"
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I went to a club in Tampa Florida, the club had two distinct halves, one with alcohol and dance floor, pool table etc Where everyone was dressed. The other half was a naked play area with several rooms and no alcohol allowed.
Single guys were only allowed in the naked area if invited by a couple, who had to take responsibility for the single and he had to leave if they did.
It worked well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Just a thought. Would it be helpful in these threads if people stuck to what behaviours they found to be an issue rather than discussing demographics or labelling genders, as tempting as that might be.
Such threads always end up with the comments of 'not all .... Are like that'. Surely the debate is about behaviours and what could be done to dress them? Most of us don't want any specific group banning from clubs so is it not about working out what promotes great swinging and trying to perpetuate that?
Bx |
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"The comments that single guys make about them keeping the clubs going because they pay a higher entrance fee is laughable at best and deluded at worst. Guys like that may be better visiting a brothel, for it seems they enter these clubs with that mindset."
You mostly find the guys who say single guys keep clubs going preface their statement with ... "I haven't been to a club but ..."
It's surprising that two of the best and most successful Dutch clubs are couples and single women only. They seem to manage without single guys and are always busy.
As to the original post, the only person we have reported to the staff of a club in 15 years of weekly visits was a single woman.
Single guys get much maligned and often it is hearsay. We have had to 'deal' with probably less than 10 single guys in the years we have been going to more than 40 clubs and probably a similar number of male halves of couples.
The vast majority of guys in clubs behave decently, the few that don't are easily avoided. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"...
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C"
The club staff could explain the club rules to everyone that attends, whether they are new to the club or not, and to all genders. As other posters have pointed out, some people think they are 'sex clubs' and don't understand the rules.
I think it would also help to point out that if there are any issues then that person will be asked to leave. |
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"...
The club staff could explain the club rules to everyone that attends, whether they are new to the club or not, and to all genders. "
Townhouse is great for this! Everyone who's new gets the full tour and talk through of the rules. Some rooms are for couples only and singles can watch from the door unless they're invited in, vampire style. Anyone breaking these rules gets a pretty well instant ban. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
The club staff could explain the club rules to everyone that attends, whether they are new to the club or not, and to all genders.
Townhouse is great for this! Everyone who's new gets the full tour and talk through of the rules. Some rooms are for couples only and singles can watch from the door unless they're invited in, vampire style. Anyone breaking these rules gets a pretty well instant ban."
Most of the clubs I've been to as a couple but I can't remember ever being told club rules. Only things like where the lockers were and about alcohol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well thats put me off attending my first club as a single man.
Why?"
It would seem single men aren't that welcome in them, according to what's being written here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well thats put me off attending my first club as a single man.
Why?
It would seem single men aren't that welcome in them, according to what's being written here."
I can't see how you have come to that conclusion. Single men are welcome in clubs, especially polite, respectful and those that understand the lifestyle. Pushy, rude, obnoxious idiots that have no social skills are not. However that goes for single fems and couples as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not just sex clubs, try the local pub or nightclub and see the behaviour by some of the patrons. It's also not just single men causing trouble in whatever kind of club you choose, watch any police fly on the wall type tv show, women and couples behave just as badly. Seems some folk have never learned how to interact in a social setting and believe that no matter what they do or say, it's acceptable. |
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"Well thats put me off attending my first club as a single man.
Why?
It would seem single men aren't that welcome in them, according to what's being written here.
I can't see how you have come to that conclusion. Single men are welcome in clubs, especially polite, respectful and those that understand the lifestyle. Pushy, rude, obnoxious idiots that have no social skills are not. However that goes for single fems and couples as well."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have been to a few clubs this year and found some to be great and others really disappointing.
During this year we have also attended nights where single men are allowed to attend clubs.
We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate. Which for us is really off putting.
We have never had any "bad" experiences regarding single men in clubs but having read lots of reviews on here. About couples having to really tell these guys there not interested..and then getting into arguments. Its sad that some men are like this.
We visited a club in Blackpool a few months ago. And there was a nasty confrontation between a single male and a guy from a couple.
There was no door staff at all and i had to go over and sort it out.
What could clubs do about "vetting" single males upon entry to a club?
Should the rules be more strict for single men?
C
I don't think single guys should be vetted unless single fems and couples are vetted too. They can cause trouble aswell. Many single guys often behave better than the couples and single fems !
Ive never seen packs of couples or women bothering people lol....
Now i know there are bad couples and women too...but some single men seem to excel at losing there manners"
I have been hassled by single fems and couples as much as i have by single guys. Hence my first comment ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Every time this subject matter comes up, my blood boils.
There is a dedicated couples night in most clubs where single men can't attend. If you don't like single men, go on couples night.
As a fair few people have said on the thread, couples or single women misbehave often!
In my experience couples behave worse than single men, I've been grabbed by the male and female in couples before and they got really pissed off when I told them that i wasn't interested.
Personally I think people need to give single men a break, it's no surprise they are concerned about attending clubs when they all get tarred with this brush.
Again I'm going to say to you couples, YOU get a dedicated night, if you don't like single men, stick to couples night!
It's not rocket science"
Well said |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Im not saying all single men are bad or behave badly..as i stated we never had a problem.
But reading a lot of reviews in the club section. Showed that single men were a bit issue being rude or just generally following couples around...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Every time this subject matter comes up, my blood boils.
There is a dedicated couples night in most clubs where single men can't attend. If you don't like single men, go on couples night.
As a fair few people have said on the thread, couples or single women misbehave often!
In my experience couples behave worse than single men, I've been grabbed by the male and female in couples before and they got really pissed off when I told them that i wasn't interested.
Personally I think people need to give single men a break, it's no surprise they are concerned about attending clubs when they all get tarred with this brush.
Again I'm going to say to you couples, YOU get a dedicated night, if you don't like single men, stick to couples night!
It's not rocket science
Well said "
Do you know how many "couples" show up where there not actully a couple and the guy wonders off!
We have seen this countless times.
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Im not saying all single men are bad or behave badly..as i stated we never had a problem.
But reading a lot of reviews in the club section. Showed that single men were a bit issue being rude or just generally following couples around...
"
you seem to be putting all the bad things down to the single men...
in most of the times i have been to clubs... most of the problems have been down to couples.... be that the man of the couple... or the woman... or both being d*unk!!!!
so when you want to just vet the single guys.....
why are we not vetting couples or heaven forbid single women to the same extent? |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Well thats put me off attending my first club as a single man.
Why?
It would seem single men aren't that welcome in them, according to what's being written here."
Why would you allow the views of a tiny portion of the Fab membership to dictate what YOU wish to do? I won't go to a club on couples only nights, or go to couples only clubs, because I go to play with men. I don't even mind the 'man-train' that sometimes occurs - I feel like I'm in a Benny Hill sketch.
There are a considerable amount of people who go to clubs who are not on Fab, so you are not getting the whole story with regards to club attitude s toward single men. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol."
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
"
Go on couples night then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
"
I see yes, so some do it some don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
Go on couples night then "
I don't normally go as its abit expensive, but yeah I know what you mean. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
Go on couples night then "
We have attended clubs on both mixed nights and couples night's and found that the single guys have been well behaved and not too pushy, they engage in conversation and generally show an interest, on the other hand couples nights have tended to have cliques of regulars that will hardly engage others apart from their immediate circle especially newbies who may be nervous! |
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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago
Dudley |
"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
Go on couples night then
We have attended clubs on both mixed nights and couples night's and found that the single guys have been well behaved and not too pushy, they engage in conversation and generally show an interest, on the other hand couples nights have tended to have cliques of regulars that will hardly engage others apart from their immediate circle especially newbies who may be nervous!"
That's my point, couples bitch about single men all the time but usually they are the ones that misbehave |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see what is it, it is a typical generalisation that men walk around and follow couples lol.
Not at all ...like we said some men act normal...
Its just the packs of desperate men are very off puting to some
Go on couples night then
We have attended clubs on both mixed nights and couples night's and found that the single guys have been well behaved and not too pushy, they engage in conversation and generally show an interest, on the other hand couples nights have tended to have cliques of regulars that will hardly engage others apart from their immediate circle especially newbies who may be nervous!
That's my point, couples bitch about single men all the time but usually they are the ones that misbehave "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Every time this subject matter comes up, my blood boils.
There is a dedicated couples night in most clubs where single men can't attend. If you don't like single men, go on couples night.
As a fair few people have said on the thread, couples or single women misbehave often!
In my experience couples behave worse than single men, I've been grabbed by the male and female in couples before and they got really pissed off when I told them that i wasn't interested.
Personally I think people need to give single men a break, it's no surprise they are concerned about attending clubs when they all get tarred with this brush.
Again I'm going to say to you couples, YOU get a dedicated night, if you don't like single men, stick to couples night!
It's not rocket science
Well said
Do you know how many "couples" show up where there not actully a couple and the guy wonders off!
We have seen this countless times.
"
I am well aware of that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im not saying all single men are bad or behave badly..as i stated we never had a problem.
But reading a lot of reviews in the club section. Showed that single men were a bit issue being rude or just generally following couples around...
you seem to be putting all the bad things down to the single men...
in most of the times i have been to clubs... most of the problems have been down to couples.... be that the man of the couple... or the woman... or both being d*unk!!!!
so when you want to just vet the single guys.....
why are we not vetting couples or heaven forbid single women to the same extent? "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Every time this subject matter comes up, my blood boils.
There is a dedicated couples night in most clubs where single men can't attend. If you don't like single men, go on couples night.
As a fair few people have said on the thread, couples or single women misbehave often!
In my experience couples behave worse than single men, I've been grabbed by the male and female in couples before and they got really pissed off when I told them that i wasn't interested.
Personally I think people need to give single men a break, it's no surprise they are concerned about attending clubs when they all get tarred with this brush.
Again I'm going to say to you couples, YOU get a dedicated night, if you don't like single men, stick to couples night!
It's not rocket science
Well said
Do you know how many "couples" show up where there not actully a couple and the guy wonders off!
We have seen this countless times.
I am well aware of that "
So then sticking to couples and single female nights wouldnt help would it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We like clubs. We think some of them could be improved. We don't want to stop going.
Doesn't it seem like a forum would be a good place to sensibly try and address the issues? Seems like the collective experience could be put to good use? Instead it seems like a constant round of 'it's not all .....' Or 'well .... Are just as bad in my view'.
For most of us, clubs are something of a symbiotic thing. Couples often want single guys around. Some couples want other couples to feel comfortable to attend. Single guys will want single women and couples in attendance. That's even before you get onto the more subtle preferences and sub groups.
Poor behaviour is poor behaviour. Surely the answer is to improve it? Not to tell people to stay out of the kitchen if they can't stand the heat from rude or obnoxious people. Just as it's important for people who are hoping for something, to understand that others will be there for their own needs to be fulfilled. Having your own limits and sticking to them is not the same as being elitist and selfish. Expecting that others will help fulfil your needs and fantasies surely must come with a willingness to trade something. Yet so often we see and hear people thinking that they are doing another group a favour. I wonder if it's a mindset like that we should be working to change?
Bx |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"We like clubs. We think some of them could be improved. We don't want to stop going.
Doesn't it seem like a forum would be a good place to sensibly try and address the issues? Seems like the collective experience could be put to good use? Instead it seems like a constant round of 'it's not all .....' Or 'well .... Are just as bad in my view'.
For most of us, clubs are something of a symbiotic thing. Couples often want single guys around. Some couples want other couples to feel comfortable to attend. Single guys will want single women and couples in attendance. That's even before you get onto the more subtle preferences and sub groups.
Poor behaviour is poor behaviour. Surely the answer is to improve it? Not to tell people to stay out of the kitchen if they can't stand the heat from rude or obnoxious people. Just as it's important for people who are hoping for something, to understand that others will be there for their own needs to be fulfilled. Having your own limits and sticking to them is not the same as being elitist and selfish. Expecting that others will help fulfil your needs and fantasies surely must come with a willingness to trade something. Yet so often we see and hear people thinking that they are doing another group a favour. I wonder if it's a mindset like that we should be working to change?
Bx"
the one thing i would absolutely agree with is that poor behaviour is poor behaviour...
the one thing that seems to have been forgotten is that poor behaviour isn't just the domain of one group of people...
and yet it is single guys who get tarred with this, whereas in my 10 years ish of going to clubs... it is as likely to actually come from couples.... but that doesn't suit the narrative of bashing the one group...
again guys get accused of going round in packs... and yes i have seen it happen..... I have also seen groups of couples going around in packs.... and actually they tend to be larger... and noiser... and you can hear giggling and laughing when they watch
ones okay apparently... the other isn't.....
an arse is an arse is an arse.... I think that some couples believe they are bulletproof because they come as a couple, and get away with far more than a single couple because they come as a couple.....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We like clubs. We think some of them could be improved. We don't want to stop going.
Doesn't it seem like a forum would be a good place to sensibly try and address the issues? Seems like the collective experience could be put to good use? Instead it seems like a constant round of 'it's not all .....' Or 'well .... Are just as bad in my view'.
For most of us, clubs are something of a symbiotic thing. Couples often want single guys around. Some couples want other couples to feel comfortable to attend. Single guys will want single women and couples in attendance. That's even before you get onto the more subtle preferences and sub groups.
Poor behaviour is poor behaviour. Surely the answer is to improve it? Not to tell people to stay out of the kitchen if they can't stand the heat from rude or obnoxious people. Just as it's important for people who are hoping for something, to understand that others will be there for their own needs to be fulfilled. Having your own limits and sticking to them is not the same as being elitist and selfish. Expecting that others will help fulfil your needs and fantasies surely must come with a willingness to trade something. Yet so often we see and hear people thinking that they are doing another group a favour. I wonder if it's a mindset like that we should be working to change?
Bx
the one thing i would absolutely agree with is that poor behaviour is poor behaviour...
the one thing that seems to have been forgotten is that poor behaviour isn't just the domain of one group of people...
and yet it is single guys who get tarred with this, whereas in my 10 years ish of going to clubs... it is as likely to actually come from couples.... but that doesn't suit the narrative of bashing the one group...
again guys get accused of going round in packs... and yes i have seen it happen..... I have also seen groups of couples going around in packs.... and actually they tend to be larger... and noiser... and you can hear giggling and laughing when they watch
ones okay apparently... the other isn't.....
an arse is an arse is an arse.... I think that some couples believe they are bulletproof because they come as a couple, and get away with far more than a single couple because they come as a couple.....
"
I think you're agreeing with far more than one thing there.
But, to suggest that no one acknowledges that it's not just single guys rather ignores hundreds of posts on this and previous threads. It's a point that's been made over and over though your example of loud chatting and giggling amongst groups of couples is a good one. In fact we complained of just that to a group of couples and I got threatened with violence from one of the guys for our trouble. The club were magnificent about it though and made it clear where they stood.
I guess that's my point. Rather than banging on about it here let's be constructive about raising standards of behaviour and rooting out those who'll just never get it, whoever they are.
Bx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think being badly behaved has more to do with how much alcohol someone has d*unk rather then what sex they are."
This is true. Was at a club in a locked room. Next thing you know there's an almighty bang on the door. A d*unk guy who I had, had a run in on a previous visit to the same club had tried to get in the room. He hit the door so hard he bent the lock so then we had to break the door to get out. Wasn't a pleasant experience and now I'm weary when I'm at a club. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh wow just read all those comments!!
I really want to go to a club as a single female but I'm really hesitant, speaking from their own personal experiences can any single females give me an idea which clubs are more single female friendly ? Xx |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
Here is my advice
If a couple are playing maybe watch and either ask do you mind if I join in or slowly move towards them and ensure they are happy if there not they will say
Try to talk to people before hand to see if they are intreasted
Don't grope, and putting fingers or cock in bum
Are no no
Make sure you have condoms at hand if invited to have sex
Always say thank you after, it helps
Anyway that's my bit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Without single guys at clubs, the whole lifestyle would be poorer...just as in life we all out the idiots and wannabees, be it socially or in business, its one of the skill sets we all have in the vanilla world. So why should it be any different in clubs etc... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have only been to a few clubs and have not had an issue at any of them from single guys. All have been perfectly pleasant and polite.
Couples we have noticed seem to have groups that have obviously become friends over time and do stay together. Which is in our opinion to be expected if you go out and meet friends in vanilla land why would it be any different in a club
We go to clubs not to play generally but to chat and network with others and if we get on then hopefully another play date can be set. If we feel comfortable and decide to play on the night we will but that has only happened once when we went to meet a specific couple. I do think people assume everyone is there specifically to play. No all are some are there as purely a social thing.
As for guys keeping a club going?? Seriously? Well how many single guys would go if couples and simple ladies didn't go? Clubs keep going because every group generally needs the other groups to keep everyone interested.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Without single guys at clubs, the whole lifestyle would be poorer...just as in life we all out the idiots and wannabees, be it socially or in business, its one of the skill sets we all have in the vanilla world. So why should it be any different in clubs etc... "
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We've been to both mixed and couples only nights and while we prefer couples only nights for the most part, we have enjoyed many a mixed night as well.
The clubs we go to where single men are allowed are the ones who actively enforce their rules and policy and where the staff are pro-active at sorting out any problems with individuals who over step the mark, (this comment is in reference to both couples and singles) second to this the clubs concerned have been careful not to just fling the doors open and allow an endless trail of single men to enter.
One of these clubs is Ourplace4fun, where an emphasis is put on letting people in who are actually capable of a conversation and won't just sit down, whack their fella out and expect you to be impressed, though clearly some people are just up for that. But your far more likely to get lucky with someone by actually talking to them, taking a polite no with good grace, and being generally friendly, than following people run like a herd of sheep waiting to jump in for a grope when some action kicks off. This type of approach is extremely off putting. Someone mentioned earlier about an argument they witnessed between a couple and a man who wouldn't take no for an answer - God we must have seen several dozen of these. But its unfair to put all the bad behavior of this nature on single men. Often couples will try it on with you where the only person they're actually interested in is the female of the other party - seen that all the time too. The list goes on, but that's another topic entirely.
At the end of the day, a club is only as good as the people who go there, how they behave and the atmosphere both the club and those attending create. So if you're at a club which is known for letting in endless single men who seem to think they can behave any way they like, your going to attract more like minded people to that sort of club, the reverse is true if the club goes for quality over cash on the door and makes sure the right kind of people come in for that club. Those couples and single ladies will vote with their feet (and wallets) accordingly.
We've enjoyed mixed nights at Ourplace4fun, Atlantis, Club F in Stanley, La Chambre and Sunday on Chameleons had a very chilled vibe too. The worst mixed club we have been to has been Rios. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We've been to both mixed and couples only nights and while we prefer couples only nights for the most part, we have enjoyed many a mixed night as well.
The clubs we go to where single men are allowed are the ones who actively enforce their rules and policy and where the staff are pro-active at sorting out any problems with individuals who over step the mark, (this comment is in reference to both couples and singles) second to this the clubs concerned have been careful not to just fling the doors open and allow an endless trail of single men to enter.
One of these clubs is Ourplace4fun, where an emphasis is put on letting people in who are actually capable of a conversation and won't just sit down, whack their fella out and expect you to be impressed, though clearly some people are just up for that. But your far more likely to get lucky with someone by actually talking to them, taking a polite no with good grace, and being generally friendly, than following people run like a herd of sheep waiting to jump in for a grope when some action kicks off. This type of approach is extremely off putting. Someone mentioned earlier about an argument they witnessed between a couple and a man who wouldn't take no for an answer - God we must have seen several dozen of these. But its unfair to put all the bad behavior of this nature on single men. Often couples will try it on with you where the only person they're actually interested in is the female of the other party - seen that all the time too. The list goes on, but that's another topic entirely.
At the end of the day, a club is only as good as the people who go there, how they behave and the atmosphere both the club and those attending create. So if you're at a club which is known for letting in endless single men who seem to think they can behave any way they like, your going to attract more like minded people to that sort of club, the reverse is true if the club goes for quality over cash on the door and makes sure the right kind of people come in for that club. Those couples and single ladies will vote with their feet (and wallets) accordingly.
We've enjoyed mixed nights at Ourplace4fun, Atlantis, Club F in Stanley, La Chambre and Sunday on Chameleons had a very chilled vibe too. The worst mixed club we have been to has been Rios. "
Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unwanted attention can be a problem at gay saunas. Usually a 'no thanks'works well but the persistent ones can ruin your stride when you are fucking. Never seen any real aggression except when someone left a steam room door open...whoops! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have only been to a few clubs and have not had an issue at any of them from single guys. All have been perfectly pleasant and polite.
Couples we have noticed seem to have groups that have obviously become friends over time and do stay together. Which is in our opinion to be expected if you go out and meet friends in vanilla land why would it be any different in a club
We go to clubs not to play generally but to chat and network with others and if we get on then hopefully another play date can be set. If we feel comfortable and decide to play on the night we will but that has only happened once when we went to meet a specific couple. I do think people assume everyone is there specifically to play. No all are some are there as purely a social thing.
As for guys keeping a club going?? Seriously? Well how many single guys would go if couples and simple ladies didn't go? Clubs keep going because every group generally needs the other groups to keep everyone interested.
"
This is such a well-balanced post I feel it should be printed out and handed out to those single men or any awkward couples even who attend a club then stand about complaining when they don't get what they want!
m x |
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Its quite simple - its all about behaviour - not gender or if single or couple.
Plenty of "couples" in clubs, that aren't actually couples - and so may be perceived to be, but if they behave wrongly would be tarred as a couple, when actually its likely the behaviour of one of the singles making up that couple(as FB's they less concerned with upsetting their other half probably)
Plenty of decent respectable single guys we've played with in clubs and made it a great night.
Some couples - that were not disrespectful, but still found it amazing they were let into the club, with way they were dressed, their D*unk state etc - and resulting bad behaviour.
Single men are not financing Swinging clubs - lets face it if its a club with a licensed bar a couple are going to spend more money on drinks than a single guy!
Peoples behaviours in clubs is what needs to be controlled, anyone behaving wrongly, should be ejected, anyone that arrives at a club that looks like they are not in a fit state, don't understand what the club is about(i.e they think its a sex/spunk club) should not be allowed in.
There is a set of club reviews on this site, with postings both by single men,women and couple, all stating that a Singles night on a particular night of the week, felt wrong, and the behaviours were bad - yes they were generally pointing out it was the behaviours of several single men(other single men were stating this to) and they all said they were going to switch to another singles night at the same club - those reviews clearly show how it the behaviour of certain people, who obviously only attend that night that causing the problem, its that behaviour that needs to be dealt with regardless of who it is, because both single guys and couples were complaining and had their night spoilt.
For the record we have played on couples and single nights, and in general had amazing times at both. Whoever the few issues we have had - have always been certain single guys - and the thing thats shocked me, is even before the issue happened, having seen these individuals in the club, I've always been amazed they even in the club - as they stood out a mile that they were going to be trouble, how/why the door staff hadnt seen the same already i don't know, we even had another single guy point one out the once and said look at him, he's what gives us a bad name!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have mixed feelings about these nights as it seems to be just men roaming and wondering round looking utterly desperate.
Its sad that some men are like this.
"
A man with a raging boner in great need on an 'empty', is highly likely not too bothered about his perceived level of social grace!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jaydees allows limited single guys on a Saturday night, however they have to book in advance I believe, have verifications on here or be recommended by someone they know who goes there. Not had a single issue with any single guy there, they are all pleasant and respectful "
The better clubs like this one have a system to approve and monitor the single men. So long as they continue doing the good word of mouth between the couples and reviews keeps the clubs busy and hence in business. |
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