FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Club Discussion > Single guys in clubs
Single guys in clubs
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Well said indeed 
I stopped going to certain clubs simply because they had a ridiculous number of couples which I don’t meet, so it was pointless having a membership with so many couples and a tiny amount of men! |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. "
I started this lifestyle as a single guy and on occasion still go to clubs solo. It's disheartening, patronising and dam insulting when you hear such comments. It irks me, as I'm sure it does for a lot of me out there. However with my couples head on it is surprising how many men don't get this.
But as guy and acouple I love the premise of this thread. There are some great single guys out there. There are plenty of threads on this site bashing guys. It's just nice to see some appreciation, respect and love for single guys. Guys are a huge part of the scene for many on here and it's nice to know we're valued and not just as a necessary nuance until we're wanted as someone's sex toy.
Loving this thread.
Mr |
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We don't think it is worth going to a sex club or party unless there are plenty of single guys. My wife is a very greedy girl and likes the full-blown attention of lots of men. When there are just couples it becomes more like a vicar's tea party with everyone just chatting vacuously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. "
This also works both ways, just because some of us single guys are quite sociable and will happily chat to anyone it didn't mean we will necessarily have sex with them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Be careful, though, not to let a single man realise that you're only being nice to him because of reading this thread... "
Not sure what this means?
The thread and the sentiment are genuine.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't think it is worth going to a sex club or party unless there are plenty of single guys. My wife is a very greedy girl and likes the full-blown attention of lots of men. When there are just couples it becomes more like a vicar's tea party with everyone just chatting vacuously."
Vicars tea party lol. Love it  |
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By *pank the MonkeyCouple
over a year ago
Down the Rabbit Hole and Round the Corner |
I think it has to be said that there is a big difference between how single guys act in person apposed to how the do online. Most single guys we have met in person are generally polite and friendly. Of course you sometimes get the the pack mentally or individual who wouldn't know respect if it bit them on the arse, these guys are easily avoided to told No.
Online we block all single guys because the general attitude is awful and we have no interest in cock picture after cock picture.
So we agree, be nice when you can. Not all single guys are fuck monkeys! |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. "
I don't expect that but it would be nice to he treated like a human instead of dome kind if pariah. I have pretty much given up on clubs these days |
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We love plenty of single guys in fact we avoid the couples and single lady only nights as she likes lots of c**k. However the downside is that you always get the ones that cant take a hint and follow you around like we are gonna give in. Well let me tell you guys that we do not give in if you follow us around in fact if you leave us be we may talk to you later and then who knows but trail us like a little duckling and you have no hope! We have even had single guys arguing over who's cock she's gonna suck. So if you see a single guy getting over exuberant it may be we leave the situation and walk away. What else can one do? Just dont take it personally its the creeps that give you all a bad name |
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"Be careful, though, not to let a single man realise that you're only being nice to him because of reading this thread...
Not sure what this means?
The thread and the sentiment are genuine.
"
It was tongue-in-cheek... |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you.
I started this lifestyle as a single guy and on occasion still go to clubs solo. It's disheartening, patronising and dam insulting when you hear such comments. It irks me, as I'm sure it does for a lot of me out there. However with my couples head on it is surprising how many men don't get this.
But as guy and acouple I love the premise of this thread. There are some great single guys out there. There are plenty of threads on this site bashing guys. It's just nice to see some appreciation, respect and love for single guys. Guys are a huge part of the scene for many on here and it's nice to know we're valued and not just as a necessary nuance until we're wanted as someone's sex toy.
Loving this thread.
Mr"
I wasn't meant to be patronising at all - but with my own experience. I have had a guy who I met at a club and chatted to. I then mentioned I was going to be at said club on a certain time and he turned up - fully expecting something because he had 'come for me'. Completely ruined my night and caused me issues with other people I was with. |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you.
This also works both ways, just because some of us single guys are quite sociable and will happily chat to anyone it didn't mean we will necessarily have sex with them."
Oh, of course! I actually think clubs are a great way to socially meet people and have had many great times just chatting to single guys with zero expectations from both sides. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. "
Important, well said |
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I go to clubs and spa's on my own and as a couple,
Never pushy or follow people around and not always up for playing either, just the environment and facilities are enough sometimes.
I have experienced the pushy follow around types though |
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I’ve been pretty sexually adventurous in my life but I’ve never been to a swingers club as a single male.
I’ve been contemplating it lately and I have to say this thread has put a few of my doubts to rest.
Thanks! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’ve been pretty sexually adventurous in my life but I’ve never been to a swingers club as a single male.
I’ve been contemplating it lately and I have to say this thread has put a few of my doubts to rest.
Thanks! "
They’re not for everyone but if you’re the sort of guy that can walk into a pub on his own, are confident enough make conversation with strangers and dress well then it can be a great night out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Certainly refreshing to see some of these posts. I’m a member of xtasia & still haven’t had the nerve to go yet. But I am definitely taking the plunge soon, believe me. |
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"I’ve been pretty sexually adventurous in my life but I’ve never been to a swingers club as a single male.
I’ve been contemplating it lately and I have to say this thread has put a few of my doubts to rest.
Thanks!
They’re not for everyone but if you’re the sort of guy that can walk into a pub on his own, are confident enough make conversation with strangers and dress well then it can be a great night out. "
Sounds like I’m in for some good times soon then  |
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Can remember my first club visit I sat in my car for 20 minutes before plucking up the courage to go in lol
Then got out car then got back in car then got out car before i eventually made it through the club door,
And one of the best things I done meet someone amazingly friendly people that I’m still friends with now
I go to clubs quite often and just be myself enjoy the social side chat about every day life
If it happens it happens
Just love being in the company of like-minded people that you find you can talk about absolutely anything
But yes there is some bad single blokes with no respect iv seen it myself
So it’s not the couples fault for putting up their guard
Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was welcomed amazingly to my 1st (currently only) club meet. Really enjoyed it. Helped settle the nervous straight away. Everyone was so friendly. (Amigos club) |
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One and only club I went to in Surrey was fine, yearssss ago went with 2 girls I knew so that helped calm the nerves otherwise no way go alone, what I noticed was such a array of different ages different sizes I didn't get upto anything but felt so welcome a lot of people chatting to me. Would I go to another yes? would I go alone? no haha still to shy to do that. |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Great sentiment. I would also say perhaps say hello to any couples that might be alone and struggling at a club as well. It's not all sweetness and roses for them either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One and only club I went to in Surrey was fine, yearssss ago went with 2 girls I knew so that helped calm the nerves otherwise no way go alone, what I noticed was such a array of different ages different sizes I didn't get upto anything but felt so welcome a lot of people chatting to me. Would I go to another yes? would I go alone? no haha still to shy to do that. "
I'd have never thought I a million years I'd be able to go to a club alone but after going a couple of times with my wife then once with a friend, I soon made friends with a couple of regards now I go all the time on my own, not so keen on going to any other clubs on my own though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A great post. Ive been to loads of clubs over the years as a single guy, and have chatted to loads of couples and singles; but thats because I'll find someone to talk to anywhere.
But their are single blokes who do feel a bit isolated. The caveat is that we guys need to be on our best behaviour (don't think that because someone chats to you that its going to end in play) and to realise that chat don't have to be about play
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Well, we had another little club visit at the weekend and we can honestly say that we were delighted to meet and chat with several single guys who were, as well as being interesting, extremely complimentary to Dora.
She came away feeling like a respected and highly desirable woman.
Cheers all |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
This is a great post D&D, and genuinely well-intentioned too, it seems. I personally gave up on the club scene as a single guy, but would have welcomed more friendly people like yourselves helping me feel included |
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As a single male,in clubs. I don't want to have sex with all. I just like the voyeur side of things. I try to talk to all. Have had couples completely blank me when I say hello. Thinking all single men want to fuck them. But I do understand that some male's follow couples around and make a bad name for us all. I think first and upmost all people need to be polite and well mannered. At the end of the day. We are all there for a good time. |
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I'm ok when I'm with friends but on my own, I'm always struggling. I'm terrible at making first moves and scared of introducing myself to new faces. Makes me feel invisible and unwanted and I'd leave the club when I get too overwhelmed by the thoughts in my head and would feel even worse by the thought that no one would have noticed I had gone and forget I was even there. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm ok when I'm with friends but on my own, I'm always struggling. I'm terrible at making first moves and scared of introducing myself to new faces. Makes me feel invisible and unwanted and I'd leave the club when I get too overwhelmed by the thoughts in my head and would feel even worse by the thought that no one would have noticed I had gone and forget I was even there."
Ah that’s very sad.
All we can say is try to overcome your negative inner thought processes.
There are lots of couples that want you there.
It’s no mistake when coupes attend specifically in the nights that single guys are welcome. |
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"I'm ok when I'm with friends but on my own, I'm always struggling. I'm terrible at making first moves and scared of introducing myself to new faces. Makes me feel invisible and unwanted and I'd leave the club when I get too overwhelmed by the thoughts in my head and would feel even worse by the thought that no one would have noticed I had gone and forget I was even there.
Ah that’s very sad.
All we can say is try to overcome your negative inner thought processes.
There are lots of couples that want you there.
It’s no mistake when coupes attend specifically in the nights that single guys are welcome. "
Yeah. I'm sure they do want me there. Getting rid of these negative thoughts and feelings is like performing an exorcism on myself sometimes. I would feel fine for a while but the demons just keep coming back. |
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The problem I have found is a very small amount k on f single guys have left a bad name so as a single guy it’s hard to go to a club and be accepted by couples that you are a decent guy and not there to be a nuisance. I only go to Adam Ans eves in Manchester sadly don’t see that many couples but I usually have to go afternoon and early evening as I have to be home to sort my daughter out as she is struggling with life. But that another story not for here. |
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Chat to loads of single guys in clubs, takes a lot for them to come in , we don’t arrange to go with a single guy though as then for us it feels like your babysitting and feel they need to stay with you never want to feel like somebody’s expecting something (tombs that can happen with meeting couples in clubs too) |
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I'm a single guy but only go to clubs now if I'm going with some fab friends. Never sure if I approach some one whether I'm imposing, some clubs let too many single guys in I get why and I'm not keen where you see lines of guys following couples around. I do really enjoy the clubs but will only go if I'm meeting friends now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thanks for this thread.
I'm struggling with veris 
As a single guy who is new to the lifestyle, I'm not able to find a meet and veris "
When you visit a club you can’t have your phone out but..
Write your Fab name in some small slips of paper or have some cards printed and hand one to people that you chat with and ask them to verify you.
We always verify nice guys if asked. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm a single guy but only go to clubs now if I'm going with some fab friends. Never sure if I approach some one whether I'm imposing, some clubs let too many single guys in I get why and I'm not keen where you see lines of guys following couples around. I do really enjoy the clubs but will only go if I'm meeting friends now "
That’s nice that you have friends willing to go with you.
We don’t specifically take anyone along with us because we’d be worried about expectations but we’ve made several friends along the way that we always like to chat with.
I think if couples see a guy chatting with other couples then the guy may be perceived as a friendly and approachable sort. |
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By *ashMan
over a year ago
Westhoughton |
"Thanks for this thread.
I'm struggling with veris
As a single guy who is new to the lifestyle, I'm not able to find a meet and veris
When you visit a club you can’t have your phone out but..
Write your Fab name in some small slips of paper or have some cards printed and hand one to people that you chat with and ask them to verify you.
We always verify nice guys if asked. "
Thanks. That's helpful |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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" I’m pretty sure I saw Diego and Dora in a club Saturday sat in reception area wish I had said hello now she’s as fit as her photos "
We did chat with quite a few people but it was a rather quiet night.
Yes you should have said hello and thanks for the compliment. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I norm go with a friend but she then goes of and I’m left on my own all night "
Is that the way that you two play or is that a disappointment?
You should always try to chat with new people though. |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Lovely thought xxx |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
awww a really nice thought, thank you  |
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Great post OP. We find going to Clubs on single friendly nights is our favourite. We are always happy to say hi. It is much more fun talking to people than standing around wondering if anyone is interested. We have yet to fuck someone we haven’t talked to!  |
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By *agic12Man
over a year ago
Durham |
I've been having those same thoughts of going to a club on my own, even though I'm a genuine confident guy the bottle just seems to totally escape me. If i sit and think about it the worse it becomes. |
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"I've been having those same thoughts of going to a club on my own, even though I'm a genuine confident guy the bottle just seems to totally escape me. If i sit and think about it the worse it becomes. "
Just do it. At end of day if your out ya depth then you can just leave. I doubt that. Just walk in as if it's a local pub. Get a drink a sit a bar and talk say hi. Don't sit at back waiting for folk to come to you. As it's said.. "if ypu build it, they will come" |
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"I've been having those same thoughts of going to a club on my own, even though I'm a genuine confident guy the bottle just seems to totally escape me. If i sit and think about it the worse it becomes. "
Give it a go. And know that there are lovely people there who could be interested in your mind, your body, or your tongue. You never know. And if you are solo, just enjoy the view.
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Just to challenge the single guy lurker stereotype some of us get. I've just been to Kestrels today, was more focussed on chatting a bit and switching off. I opted not to play today (though I did get hard at some of the hot sights!) While part of me regrets not playing with a particularly hot couple, my head wasn't in the right place and I'm a firm believer that if you're not feeling it, don't try to power through.
Moral of the story: sometimes it works the other way and the single guy can say no, we're not all gagging to cum.
Talking to a couple/likeminded people gives me loads of enjoyment rather than always physical hands on stuff. I love the sentiment of the post ??
Or maybe I'm Sapiosexual |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Absolutely love this post. Fab needs more couples like you guys ! Xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
Absolutely love this post. Fab needs more couples like you guys ! Xx "
All the best.
Keep the faith! |
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By *anasGodMan
over a year ago
everywhere |
"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
Absolutely love this post. Fab needs more couples like you guys ! Xx
All the best.
Keep the faith! "
Yeah lovely post…best option is to take some with you…try to introduce them to the clubs…to go alone feels weird especially as a single guy…share the love |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
Absolutely love this post. Fab needs more couples like you guys ! Xx
All the best.
Keep the faith!
Yeah lovely post…best option is to take some with you…try to introduce them to the clubs…to go alone feels weird especially as a single guy…share the love "
Yeah we won’t do that again unfortunately.
Very bad experience we had with that once. |
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We have found that posting a meeting saying that we will be at XYZ Club on a particular date has been the most effective.
We often end up chatting with guys and couples and some we arrange to meet. We never expect any of them to turn up, but when they have we have found that we connect a lot better & quicker |
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"We have found that posting a meeting saying that we will be at XYZ Club on a particular date has been the most effective.
We often end up chatting with guys and couples and some we arrange to meet. We never expect any of them to turn up, but when they have we have found that we connect a lot better & quicker "
Here here. And also when I'm going solo sometimes it is lively to pre connect with a couple or bi solo and just hello. They can know a fraction about me before mtg. Xx |
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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago
shropshire |
"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Arrrr that's a lovely message..spoke to a few that want to go but are terrified |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
If you are a socialable person.. and can just chat to people for the sake of chatting you will be absolutely fine….
The issue is that for a lot of people, because they are an a sexual atmosphere they feel they have to talk about sex, and everything has to be sex related!
It’s a mentality thing… at the beginning don’t talk to people any differently than you would in a pub or social setting!
Too many people just stand in a club like a lost lamb…. Just go round and say hello… all conversations start with it and if people give you the skunk eye for just a hello then that’s a them issue and not you!
A hello isn’t a I want to jump into your knickers.. a hello is just a hello and too many people want to make inferences from it! |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
Absolutely love this post. Fab needs more couples like you guys ! Xx
All the best.
Keep the faith!
Yeah lovely post…best option is to take some with you…try to introduce them to the clubs…to go alone feels weird especially as a single guy…share the love
Yeah we won’t do that again unfortunately.
Very bad experience we had with that once. "
I would not do that too, I’m afraid. Some guys, especially when going to the club for the first time, behave like a kid in a sweet shop. I usually end up looking after them or, even worse, feel ashamed.
No thanks, not for me, I’d rather go alone and meet guys already there. |
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I shall be visiting a couple of clubs this weekend where I am likely to know no one. It's daunting approaching somewhere new but hopefully there will be individuals like you OP and some others like the lots of fab folk I've met in clubs over the years  |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Is it ok if i just wonder around naked with a hardon  "
Erm… in most clubs you want round in some sort of dress.. even if it’s just a towel!
I think the kinda outlines the problem… it’s the projection that some people have of what clubs are actually like |
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"I shall be visiting a couple of clubs this weekend where I am likely to know no one. It's daunting approaching somewhere new but hopefully there will be individuals like you OP and some others like the lots of fab folk I've met in clubs over the years "
Knowing you personally I’m somehow sure you will be more than okay, and everyone will be lucky to enjoy your company. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I shall be visiting a couple of clubs this weekend where I am likely to know no one. It's daunting approaching somewhere new but hopefully there will be individuals like you OP and some others like the lots of fab folk I've met in clubs over the years "
Hope it turns out to be a great weekend for you.
Dora will be sporting short pink hair so if you see us say Hi. |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you.
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you. "
But can i just add, that just because a guy is chatting to a single female, don't automatically assume he wants to have sex with you.
Wanted to try Chams for quite some time now (i live fairly local) but what's always put me off is, am i going to sit/stand there all night twiddling my thumbs on my own? If i approach somebody to chat, will i just get cold shouldered? How friendly are folk to single guys?
And no, just because someones chatting to me would i assume they want sex with me and neither am i trying to hit on someone else if i start chatting to them.
Got almost a week off work with a busy social weekend but might give it a go tonight or early next week to find my answers. |
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"I’ve been to parties as a single guy and not felt welcome.
Likewise mate. It's very easy to feel like a gatecrasher isn't it? At least you have the bmfc events you'll feel welcome in "
It’s who organises the party and getting the amounts of participants right ? I went to my first ever social or meet at a party was like a rabbit in headlights until the door opened?
I got given a massive hug and kiss before I even knew who they were ! Invited into a room where everyone else was chatting and having a laugh this made the whole experience flow really well and I fondly remember the people I met that night |
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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago
Nr Leicester |
"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
But can I also add, that just because a female is chatting with a single guy, don’t automatically assume they’ll have sex with you.
I started this lifestyle as a single guy and on occasion still go to clubs solo. It's disheartening, patronising and dam insulting when you hear such comments. It irks me, as I'm sure it does for a lot of me out there. However with my couples head on it is surprising how many men don't get this.
But as guy and acouple I love the premise of this thread. There are some great single guys out there. There are plenty of threads on this site bashing guys. It's just nice to see some appreciation, respect and love for single guys. Guys are a huge part of the scene for many on here and it's nice to know we're valued and not just as a necessary nuance until we're wanted as someone's sex toy.
Loving this thread.
Mr"
This!! Mr was a single guy on his initial exploration before we met. So utterly sympathetic to the fine line guys have to tread.
We appreciate respectful approach from guys at clubs, less so the serreptitious attempts to touch uninvited. But these are few and far between.. |
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"I shall be visiting a couple of clubs this weekend where I am likely to know no one. It's daunting approaching somewhere new but hopefully there will be individuals like you OP and some others like the lots of fab folk I've met in clubs over the years
Knowing you personally I’m somehow sure you will be more than okay, and everyone will be lucky to enjoy your company. "
That's very kind of you to say. Hopefully it won't be too long before we venture out to a club again |
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"I shall be visiting a couple of clubs this weekend where I am likely to know no one. It's daunting approaching somewhere new but hopefully there will be individuals like you OP and some others like the lots of fab folk I've met in clubs over the years
Hope it turns out to be a great weekend for you.
Dora will be sporting short pink hair so if you see us say Hi. "
I would very much like to meet you both. Unlikely I'll bump into you this weekend though unless you are travelling to the North West of England |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As a single guy who's been to clubs before and would like to attend again, I'd never dream of assuming sex is on the cards just because a woman approaches me. The default me is to just be chatty flirty and not pushy at all. In fact I resist a fair bit tbh .. just my inbuilt shyness.. I enjoy the chat and flirt and to me it lays the seeds for the next time you bump into each other.. chemistry needs time to fizz away with me but it's always worth the wait and eye contact and later encounter.. the anticipation makes the sex much more intense if it were to happen.
Just my thoughts. |
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx"
Been curious for a while now but wouldnt want to stand out like a sore thumb. Not pushy or expectant in the slightest. Though not shy going solo not knowing the etiquette either takes balls or complete arrogance. Those who ive spoke too and most of the comments on this thread ease most of the doubts i had thankyou |
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We always welcome single guys in clubs and often looking to involve them, we appreciate being approached and having a chat rather than waiting till we’re having sex and standing by the bed. It can be daunting as a couple do fair play to those that make the effort x |
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By *yreGuy99Man
over a year ago
Doesn't matter |
I'll probably never go to a club.
First off, there's none close to me that i can travel too.
Secondly i won't spend money to stand in the corner and talk to myself.
I'll never get naked in front of another guy so it would be a bit pointless.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'll always want single guys in clubs. I do try to be nice and approachable, it's always nice to be nice like you said op. "
Exactly.
Why be an arse?
Win win. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'll probably never go to a club.
First off, there's none close to me that i can travel too.
Secondly i won't spend money to stand in the corner and talk to myself.
I'll never get naked in front of another guy so it would be a bit pointless.
"
No it doesn’t sound like it would be your thing at all
Clubs are supposed to be fun and are best filled with people open to trying new things. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We enjoy your company and we appreciate the effort that it sometimes takes for you to just walk in the door let alone approach a couple.
Let’s make an effort this weekend to chat and get to know a single guy that might be struggling at your local club.
You don’t have to fuck him but it’s nice to be nice.
Have a great weekend everyone. Xx
Been curious for a while now but wouldnt want to stand out like a sore thumb. Not pushy or expectant in the slightest. Though not shy going solo not knowing the etiquette either takes balls or complete arrogance. Those who ive spoke too and most of the comments on this thread ease most of the doubts i had thankyou"
Sounds as though you’ll be fine buddy.
Give it a go.
Have a chat and a flirt at the very least you should get a few verifications. |
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"I’ve been pretty sexually adventurous in my life but I’ve never been to a swingers club as a single male.
I’ve been contemplating it lately and I have to say this thread has put a few of my doubts to rest.
Thanks! "
I always go on my own, people are very welcoming though and always want to talk without necessarily having intentions.
Bonus point I’ve even made friends surprisingly |
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Always been curious about going to a club as a single guy, but equally have always been a bit apprehensive about the whole experience, as someone who is not exactly ripped, my imagination of how it would go tends to persuade me against going! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s pretty much why I go to clubs.
I’m not sure why there is so much negativity towards single guys. Yeah some can be a pain but just tell them. "
I think because some single guys on here make it hard for others and it tends to wear you down...
I'd really like to go to a club but given how the majority of single guys on here have approached me via inbox I'd be terrified to have that in person ..
so when I envision a club with single guys I tend to think that I will be treated /approached the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We love plenty of single guys in fact we avoid the couples and single lady only nights as she likes lots of c**k. However the downside is that you always get the ones that cant take a hint and follow you around like we are gonna give in. Well let me tell you guys that we do not give in if you follow us around in fact if you leave us be we may talk to you later and then who knows but trail us like a little duckling and you have no hope! We have even had single guys arguing over who's cock she's gonna suck. So if you see a single guy getting over exuberant it may be we leave the situation and walk away. What else can one do? Just dont take it personally its the creeps that give you all a bad name"
recently had this 'problem' with our first time. 'Trailing us like little ducklings' is exactly what it is like! its just creepy! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We love plenty of single guys in fact we avoid the couples and single lady only nights as she likes lots of c**k. However the downside is that you always get the ones that cant take a hint and follow you around like we are gonna give in. Well let me tell you guys that we do not give in if you follow us around in fact if you leave us be we may talk to you later and then who knows but trail us like a little duckling and you have no hope! We have even had single guys arguing over who's cock she's gonna suck. So if you see a single guy getting over exuberant it may be we leave the situation and walk away. What else can one do? Just dont take it personally its the creeps that give you all a bad name
recently had this 'problem' with our first time. 'Trailing us like little ducklings' is exactly what it is like! its just creepy!"
I would be mortified ! this is my exact fear of going as a single woman ...the ones that can't take a no or try to wear you down ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Always been curious about going to a club as a single guy, but equally have always been a bit apprehensive about the whole experience, as someone who is not exactly ripped, my imagination of how it would go tends to persuade me against going!"
It takes all sorts buddy.
We’ve seen some really fit and ripped guys who had no idea how to make basic conversation so we passed them by
Confidence and the ability to chat and flirt will get you much further! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thinking of maybe heading tona club tonight but never been on an evening and worried will be sat on my tod haha "
Well you know that’s going to be down to you mate.
Have some conversation pieces lined up in your head, smile, dress smartly, smell great and make the effort to approach or at least look approachable.
Go for it! |
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Some guys can be a little annoying and follow you round like they've lost their mother.
I just ignore them or ask if they are lost haha.
They soon understand I don't want the shadowing
That said I prefer clubs that allow single guys and enjoy getting what I want in fun
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