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Single male nervous about attending a club
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Hey everyone, id love to go to a club but being a single lad im abit nervous about everything and what to expect, does anyone have any tips or advice? Or even better anyone in nottingham looking for a buddy to tag along lol  |
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"Hey everyone, id love to go to a club but being a single lad im abit nervous about everything and what to expect, does anyone have any tips or advice? Or even better anyone in nottingham looking for a buddy to tag along lol "
I’m the same mate never been to a club but wanting to try one, but very anxious about it |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"Hey everyone, id love to go to a club but being a single lad im abit nervous about everything and what to expect, does anyone have any tips or advice? Or even better anyone in nottingham looking for a buddy to tag along lol "
It's not much different to going to a night club or pub really. If your a sociable person and go there with no expectations then you'll be ok. If don't like communicating with people then, you may not like it. There's a club in Nottingham (purple mamba) that does workshops for couples and single guys that are new to clubbing, you can try attending one of those. |
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I starting on the scene as a single male (Mr here ovbs). I know how hard it is to make your first visit. My advice would be just to get stuck in and go. I was really nervous. I'm not the most socially outgoing and can be a little socially awkward. But I figured if I don't go, I won't. What's the worse that can happen? So I decided that afternoon and went. Was myself and it went great. So much so I never looked back. I would probably recommend going alone (unless your taking a play partner). Because I think sometimes when guys go together it can be a bit off putting. If a guy is confident alone I think that comes across as a lot more attractive than a guy hiding in the pack. Also best try your first club visit where there is no paid membership needed. Most of all dont go with expectations, just be friendly, chatty and enjoy your the evening as you would any other night out.
Granted this whole virus thing has changed the game as clubs aren't the same at the moment. So up to you if you want to try the current format or wait till back to normal. |
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Essentially you get out what you put in.
Be social, polite & make good eye contact. Try not to be too shy & definitely not too bold.
Go with no explanation beyond meeting new people and you will be absolutely fine.
The guys who struggle are those that confuse a swingers club with a brothel, the ladies & couples are there for the same as you but normal rules of attraction will still apply.
Rember to most the mind is the sexiest part of a man's body. |
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"Essentially you get out what you put in.
Be social, polite & make good eye contact. Try not to be too shy & definitely not too bold.
Go with no explanation beyond meeting new people and you will be absolutely fine.
The guys who struggle are those that confuse a swingers club with a brothel, the ladies & couples are there for the same as you but normal rules of attraction will still apply.
Rember to most the mind is the sexiest part of a man's body. "
Is there not a club in the midlands that is both  |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"There’s lots of single men making threads like this. I often wonder why they don’t just go in together?"
You could be their tour guide . Just grab a bus and roundem all up .
Once we're back to normal of course. |
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"There’s lots of single men making threads like this. I often wonder why they don’t just go in together?
You could be their tour guide . Just grab a bus and roundem all up .
Once we're back to normal of course. "
That’s actually some shit I’d do isn’t it?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Essentially you get out what you put in.
Be social, polite & make good eye contact. Try not to be too shy & definitely not too bold.
Go with no explanation beyond meeting new people and you will be absolutely fine.
The guys who struggle are those that confuse a swingers club with a brothel, the ladies & couples are there for the same as you but normal rules of attraction will still apply.
Rember to most the mind is the sexiest part of a man's body. "
Absolutely best advice! Wish this could be displayed on swingers club doors!!! |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"There’s lots of single men making threads like this. I often wonder why they don’t just go in together?
You could be their tour guide . Just grab a bus and roundem all up .
Once we're back to normal of course.
That’s actually some shit I’d do isn’t it? "
That's because your the Mother Teresa of the swing world
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"There’s lots of single men making threads like this. I often wonder why they don’t just go in together?
You could be their tour guide . Just grab a bus and roundem all up .
Once we're back to normal of course.
That’s actually some shit I’d do isn’t it?
That's because your the Mother Teresa of the swing world
"
Oh god. I am. #Nun |
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"There’s lots of single men making threads like this. I often wonder why they don’t just go in together?
You could be their tour guide . Just grab a bus and roundem all up .
Once we're back to normal of course.
That’s actually some shit I’d do isn’t it?
That's because your the Mother Teresa of the swing world
Oh god. I am. #Nun"
#bighearted
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"If you don't have the balls to walk into a club by yourself then how do you think you will be able to strip naked and fuck strangers in a group setting?"
Haha gives a whole new meaning to grow a pair ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When they reopen again just bite the bully and go. The only rules I would say that will help you have a great night are
1. Go with no expectations of playing
2. Treat the night as a social event and go talk to people
3. THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE. Don’t follow couples or single ladies around; it’s creepy and it won’t make you any friends. Also don’t stand around doorways with your hand under your towel.
So to reiterate; talk to people, make friends and you MAY get invited to play |
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Best advice I can give is go to an organised social near the club you want to attend first and get known. That way you will know at least some people in the club to talk to and hopefully get introduced to others. It's all about networking. |
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"Best advice I can give is go to an organised social near the club you want to attend first and get known. That way you will know at least some people in the club to talk to and hopefully get introduced to others. It's all about networking."
I agree. For your first visit to any club, I would recommend you have at least one friendly face to meet inside, and help introduce you to others. Never go in ‘cold’ by yourself, not knowing anyone inside, and do contact the club beforehand to ask which times/events single guys are ACTIVELY SOUGHT. Use this time now, when the clubs are closed, to get to know people through the forums, and make a few contacts ready for when they reopen.
My message filters are open to all, and I’m happy to chat about my experiences as a single guy in the club scene  |
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By *JohnMan
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"For your first visit to any club, I would recommend you have at least one friendly face to meet inside, and help introduce you to others."
My advice is the opposite. It depends on the personality of the individual, really.
In my case, I am very shy and introverted. Having someone I knew there would have made it too easy to stick with them, when my whole purpose in going was to meet new people.
I went on my own, and was forced to talk with people I didn't know. It was either that or sit in the corner and have a very boring night. But I made the effort, and over the following weeks started to get to know a few people. I have proper friends there now. |
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"Hey everyone, id love to go to a club but being a single lad im abit nervous about everything and what to expect, does anyone have any tips or advice? Or even better anyone in nottingham looking for a buddy to tag along lol "
Nothing wrong with being a bit nervous. As and when this health crisis ends - just do it. Based on my club visits, I’ve met some lovely people and had great times. |
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"Essentially you get out what you put in.
Be social, polite & make good eye contact. Try not to be too shy & definitely not too bold.
Go with no explanation beyond meeting new people and you will be absolutely fine.
The guys who struggle are those that confuse a swingers club with a brothel, the ladies & couples are there for the same as you but normal rules of attraction will still apply.
Rember to most the mind is the sexiest part of a man's body.
Absolutely best advice! Wish this could be displayed on swingers club doors!!!"
Maybe I should stand outside Dare 2 when they reopen & do my best town cryer impersonation  |
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"For your first visit to any club, I would recommend you have at least one friendly face to meet inside, and help introduce you to others.
My advice is the opposite. It depends on the personality of the individual, really.
In my case, I am very shy and introverted. Having someone I knew there would have made it too easy to stick with them, when my whole purpose in going was to meet new people.
I went on my own, and was forced to talk with people I didn't know. It was either that or sit in the corner and have a very boring night. But I made the effort, and over the following weeks started to get to know a few people. I have proper friends there now."
If I ever get the opportunity to revisit Club f, I'll be sure to let you know when I'm going. I'm sure we would have an interesting chat at the bar |
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By *JohnMan
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
"It's not the best times for a newbie to have the club experiences lol"
But it is! Well, it was. The rules seem to be changing every 30 minutes and I don't know what they are right now. But being able to go to a club to socialise, without any possibility of anyone playing, is perfect for a nervous newbie. It's a chance to get to know the regulars without all the added pressure. You know what to expect, and they know what you're expecting (and not expecting).
I've had some good conversations with people I wouldn't normally have dared to approach (thinking them 'out of my league' and there's no way they'd be interested in me). But we happened to be sitting near to each other in the bar. It's too easy to judge by appearance, and surprisingly common for that judgement to be completely wrong.
The club scene, at least in the clubs I've experienced, is very much NOT just about sex. The social aspect is hugely important. We've still got that. |
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By *r NeilMan
over a year ago
Lancs Mancs |
"It's not the best times for a newbie to have the club experiences lol
But it is! Well, it was. The rules seem to be changing every 30 minutes and I don't know what they are right now. But being able to go to a club to socialise, without any possibility of anyone playing, is perfect for a nervous newbie. It's a chance to get to know the regulars without all the added pressure. You know what to expect, and they know what you're expecting (and not expecting).
I've had some good conversations with people I wouldn't normally have dared to approach (thinking them 'out of my league' and there's no way they'd be interested in me). But we happened to be sitting near to each other in the bar. It's too easy to judge by appearance, and surprisingly common for that judgement to be completely wrong.
The club scene, at least in the clubs I've experienced, is very much NOT just about sex. The social aspect is hugely important. We've still got that."
yes it is important but the 99% go for the reason that's why there are called swinging clubs to swing lol |
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"It's not the best times for a newbie to have the club experiences lol
But it is! Well, it was. The rules seem to be changing every 30 minutes and I don't know what they are right now. But being able to go to a club to socialise, without any possibility of anyone playing, is perfect for a nervous newbie. It's a chance to get to know the regulars without all the added pressure. You know what to expect, and they know what you're expecting (and not expecting).
I've had some good conversations with people I wouldn't normally have dared to approach (thinking them 'out of my league' and there's no way they'd be interested in me). But we happened to be sitting near to each other in the bar. It's too easy to judge by appearance, and surprisingly common for that judgement to be completely wrong.
The club scene, at least in the clubs I've experienced, is very much NOT just about sex. The social aspect is hugely important. We've still got that."
Except you can’t even socialise now, you have to remain at your table & not socialise with people at other tables!! |
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"When they reopen again just bite the bully and go. The only rules I would say that will help you have a great night are
1. Go with no expectations of playing
2. Treat the night as a social event and go talk to people
3. THE MOST IMPORTANT RULE. Don’t follow couples or single ladies around; it’s creepy and it won’t make you any friends. Also don’t stand around doorways with your hand under your towel.
So to reiterate; talk to people, make friends and you MAY get invited to play"
This is great advice - plus what Rhino said also.
Wait til the clubs are fully open again, restrictions now really limit socialising, so it’s likely to feel quite unwelcoming to a single newbie as no one can really chat to you 
Good luck! |
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"Hey everyone, id love to go to a club but being a single lad im abit nervous about everything and what to expect, does anyone have any tips or advice? Or even better anyone in nottingham looking for a buddy to tag along lol "
I jumped straight in at deep end went to a club as a single male within 2 weeks of joining fab it was great the people were lovely and could see i was bit nervous as there were about 120 in and i didnt know a single person lol . Just rememeber if you dont talk to people and make the effort then you are likely to have a wasted evening you get out what you put it if you know what i mean lol. Dont be pushy or cocky cus people wont like that but be confident and just hope you get invitied to join in with the fun ...Good luck |
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By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
Ask a woman friend ( swinger or otherwise) that you already know to go with you OP. It's much easier going with a woman as a couple. Don't expect to recruit one on fab just for that purpose though . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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most clubs now during covid 19 are just for social times. They are not open to have and get fuxxked. Best read the local blurb on nottinghams clubs.
This is covid 19 that we are all in.
Some are open some are not. Some are open for a table of 6 but that is not for anything of the sexual
some clubs say you get booted if seen to be having sex in a swinging club. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you go by yourself in the present Covid circumstances you will l have to sit at a table by yourself and not socialise with anyone else.
But if you really want to do that then just man up and go; you won't get eaten
Otherwise a find a woman to take with you; at least you will have someone to talk to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Although I'm not new to the swinging scene, I've never been to a club, all my meetings have been through forums and chatrooms, though not necessarily on this site.
The main reason for not visiting a club is that I work nights.
I would like to know what clubs are like during the daytime; the easiest one for me is Club29 in Leicester. Does anyone have any experience of Club 29? |
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