The Vanilla Alternative

Rating: Fabulous
	Fab needs an extra review rating as this club is SUPER FUCKING FABULOUS!!! Attended Spicyminx's bi night again last night and once again she totally smashed it with a fantastic mix of hot and horny people. This club has it all and is my favourite club by far. Always a great night and can I just thank the wonderful new lady manager for going above and beyond and keeping the club open an extra hour so we could all finish enjoying ourselves....now THAT is a grest way to make an already awesome night just that little bit more awesomer. See you again next month x Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous

Fab needs an extra review rating as this club is SUPER FUCKING FABULOUS!!! Attended Spicyminx's bi night again last night and once again she totally smashed it with a fantastic mix of hot and horny people. This club has it all and is my favourite club by far. Always a great night and can I just thank the wonderful new lady manager for going above and beyond and keeping the club open an extra hour so we could all finish enjoying ourselves....now THAT is a grest way to make an already awesome night just that little bit more awesomer. See you again next month x

Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Another fab time at the VA for bi night. Spicy is the most amazing hostess and the manager is an absolute bleeming angel. The club was packed with swingers and kinksters and there was literally something for everybody. Till the next time! X Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: OK
	Attended spicyminx's bi night last... it was AMAZINGLY GOOD...The lady walking around in the nurses outfit, please get in touch. Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Spicey’s Bi night was once again Epic! She never falls to get it just right with the mix of people. Always welcoming, this is one of the best club nights going. I try to be there every month. VA is such a fantastic venue too. Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Last night was fantastic . Spicy does a fantastic job organising the bi night .. well done to her . I can't wait to go again xx Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Me and jade attended last night and had a fantastic night. Our first club night and it was everything we wanted it to be... please say hi if we spoke or played :)jade and Joe x Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Fantastic club ! Bloody awesome place ! Staff friendly & helpful are proper sweeties too. Club is clean and well maintained - plenty of play areas - we spent this evening at the Bi night - and it was well busy ! This is our local now - We have only been 6 times in the last 4 weeks - try and keep us away - yum ! Defo recommend - A* FABULOUS ! Date: 7 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Our first time at the VA and we were very impressed. We stayed in the hotel over night (room 4) and were really happy with the size of room/facilities/comfy bed and pillows. The staff there were great with constant friendly happy faces and couldn't do enough to help you! The size of the club had plenty of room in the play areas, hot tub was a tight squeeze though obviously not a problem! ; ) and the bar area had enough seating/space to socialise. It looked clean and classy! Will defiantly visit again! Really enjoyed the whole experience in this club/hotel! Date: 3 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous

Our first time at the VA and we were very impressed. We stayed in the hotel over night (room 4) and were really happy with the size of room/facilities/comfy bed and pillows. The staff there were great with constant friendly happy faces and couldn't do enough to help you! The size of the club had plenty of room in the play areas, hot tub was a tight squeeze though obviously not a problem! ; ) and the bar area had enough seating/space to socialise. It looked clean and classy! Will defiantly visit again! Really enjoyed the whole experience in this club/hotel!

Date: 3 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	When we started this “swinging” thing we always thought there was more to the club seen than we were experiencing, and we were right. The VA is a notch above the rest, the gold standard, the bench mark that the others should aspire to. We’ve been looking for something that little bit classier, and we’ve found it (can you tell already that we had a great time?) We stayed in room 9, all clean and presentable, it serves a purpose on the night, nice bath, tea, coffee, comfy bed and acceptable pillows. The club itself is well equipped, plenty of areas to play or just sit and watch. The hot tub is the best (it’s actually an endless swim pool that doubles up). The bar is run well, and reasonably priced. The atmosphere was great, relaxed and friendly. If your looking for a great hedonistic night out, swing by the VA. Date: 1 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous

When we started this “swinging” thing we always thought there was more to the club seen than we were experiencing, and we were right. The VA is a notch above the rest, the gold standard, the bench mark that the others should aspire to. We’ve been looking for something that little bit classier, and we’ve found it (can you tell already that we had a great time?) We stayed in room 9, all clean and

presentable, it serves a purpose on the night, nice bath, tea, coffee, comfy bed and acceptable pillows. The club itself is well equipped, plenty of areas to play or just sit and watch. The hot tub is the best (it’s actually an endless swim pool that doubles up). The bar is run well, and reasonably priced. The atmosphere was great, relaxed and friendly. If your looking for a great hedonistic night out, swing by the VA.

Date: 1 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	First visit on Friday with my FWB. Great venue. Bloody great staff. Amazing sex. Can't wait to go again!!!! Date: 1 September 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Our 3rd time back and we stayed this time. K&j had the best time incredible club so freindly no pressure and we had so much fun several times. Date: 1 September 2019

Rating: Fun
	First time back to VA in over a year, still a great venue. Slightly quiet though but no more than usual for a Friday night. Will continue to return but on special event nights. Would recommend the Date: 31 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Nice clean club - lots of potential here. Friendly staff, large social & bar area area with several play areas. We have visited several times now and will continue to do so. Date: 26 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Our first time at VA last saturday for a couple and single ladies night and it didn't disappoint! We felt very welcomed and met several lovely and sexy couples. The Club has a lots of room to socialise and ‘play’ and everywhere was full of hot couples having fun! We look forward to visiting it again. Date: 26 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Lovely Club, lovely staff, lovely people .. lovely time xx Great Club, friendly and well run .. A++++ Date: 25 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Thanks guys for a fab eve with you guys. Our first visit was truly amazing. Thank you. Everything from the wonderful welcome to the huge hot tub to the wonderful couples we met, chatted and played with to the fab pizza too! All in all it’s a great club for us to return to and meet wonderful friends at. Can’t wait to return.....very very soon. Thanks again all xx Date: 25 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Never disappointed when we pay a visit to VA. One of our favourite club. Reasonably priced, Helpful friendly staff, great music & vibe, amazing jacuzzi, clean modern play areas, plenty of fun and sexy clientele. Well worth a visit. Xxx S&J Date: 22 August 2019

Rating: Fun
	We attended last night for our first time to V.A. Lovely clean and inviting club with lots of places to play. The hot tub was just amazing..so much fun. Bit quieter than expected for a Saturday but none the less we enjoyed our time and will be back from more. Thanks guys xxx Date: 18 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Another evening for us in the club. Although a little quieter due to being nearly payday, was still plenty going on. And the pizzas were a nice addition. As always the club is spotless and we made full use of the mirrored couples room. A good mix of ages to appeal to everyone’s taste, and clientele are always respectful. Can’t complain at all. Date: 18 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	We attended the VA for a couple and singles ladies night and wow it was fantastic. As our first time there we were shown around and given a free drink which is great for calming any nerves. This friendliness from the staff continued throughout the night! The facilities within the club were great, now we know what they have we will definitely be making use of their more bdsm facilities. Tub was fantastic and clever glory hole which was not at all intimidating. As for the other guests it was fantastic especially as a younger couple seeing lots of other young couples there. It was a fantastic hedonistic night. The music was eclectic (but then cant please everyone) bar was fantastic too. Only constructive criticism would be the hotelrooms onsite could perhaps do with a touch up but definitely stayed in more expensive places that weren’t that nice and of course the important thing being didn’t have to worry about taxi or driving or hotel in the early hours of the morning. Overall loved it and worried nowhere else will compare now - Can’t wait to go back as soon as real life lets us! If you’re considering going just go well worth it. Date: 11 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous

We attended the VA for a couple and singles ladies night and wow it was fantastic.

As our first time there we were shown around and given a free drink which is great for calming any nerves. This friendliness from the staff continued throughout the night!

The facilities within the club were great, now we know what they have we will definitely be making use of their more bdsm facilities. Tub was fantastic and clever glory hole which was not at all intimidating.

As for the other guests it was fantastic especially as a younger couple seeing lots of other young couples there. It was a fantastic hedonistic night.

The music was eclectic (but then cant please everyone) bar was fantastic too.

Only constructive criticism would be the hotelrooms onsite could perhaps do with a touch up but definitely stayed in more expensive places that weren’t that nice and of course the important thing being didn’t have to worry about taxi or driving or hotel in the early hours of the morning.

Overall loved it and worried nowhere else will compare now - Can’t wait to go back as soon as real life lets us! If you’re considering going just go well worth it.

Date: 11 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Had our first club experience at VA last night and it didn't disappoint, all the play areas were amazing, especially the hot tub room. We look forward to visiting again soon. Date: 11 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	We took a 2 hour trip down to VA to meet a couple we had been talking to on fab !!! And it was so worth it there was sooo many hot fun people around!! Certainly got steamy in the play rooms . We also started the night in one of the rooms upstairs which was so worth the money ! We would definitely return .. if we see you please say hi xx Date: 11 August 2019

Rating: Fun
	Really enjoyed our visit last night, wasn’t sure what to expect but it was a fabulous evening, jasmine had plenty of fun in all the rooms! Stayed over night which made it very easy at the end of the night. We will be back Date: 10 August 2019

Rating: Fun
	My first time at VA and was made to feel very welcome. Lovely place and very nice. Lots of room to socialise and ‘play’. Stayed overnight, the room was nice and clean ... but a little dark for applying make up! Would definately go again and look forward to my next visit, hopefully not before too long. Thx to all xx Date: 10 August 2019

Rating: Fun
	Went Sat 3rd Aug all day n evening to the FOF. My third visit. I had an amazing time with friends old and new and treated quite a few to a free cock n pussy health check with my dear friend Doctor Sylvester!! And had a wonderful check myself with a delicious strap on! Keep up the good work. Brilliant fun thank you. If you remember me come n say hi x x Date: 8 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Another fun filled Festival of Fun run by the hard-working Vanilla Alternative team. Such a beautiful clean club, with gorgeous grounds, it's always a highlight of my year to attend the festival. I particularly enjoyed the new permanent seating area near the back of the club, where there were DJs playing under the stars and we were all dancing and having having a great time. That foam party was also a highlight, and I loved that it was in the afternoon like last year as it was warm and I had time to change into something more sexy for the evening entertainment. I can't even start to imagine the amount of hard work and planning it must take to put on anything like this. Thank you so much for providing it for us all and roll on next year. Date: 8 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous

Another fun filled Festival of Fun run by the hard-working Vanilla Alternative team. Such a beautiful clean club, with gorgeous grounds, it's always a highlight of my year to attend the festival.

I particularly enjoyed the new permanent seating area near the back of the club, where there were DJs playing under the stars and we were all dancing and having having a great time.

That foam party was also a highlight, and I loved that it was in the afternoon like last year as it was warm and I had time to change into something more sexy for the evening entertainment.

I can't even start to imagine the amount of hard work and planning it must take to put on anything like this. Thank you so much for providing it for us all and roll on next year.

Date: 8 August 2019

Rating: OK
	We booked and attended the VA festival of fun last weekend. The amount we paid for two nights to attend the club and pay for camping was not great value given the facilities available, in the main two toilets for the amount of people attending was without doubt not sufficient. Also the tents were pushed together quite close and with a contained fire left unattended one evening was quite dangerous. The music on site either by the club or personal guests went on far to long, 4am so sufficient sleep to be able to enjoy the festival was impossible. We have been to this festival at least 4 times previously and this was by far the worst. That said we did ha e a good time due to the people we knew and met. Date: 7 August 2019

Rating: OK

We booked and attended the VA festival of fun last weekend. The amount we paid for two nights to attend the club and pay for camping was not great value given the facilities available, in the main two toilets for the amount of people attending was without doubt not sufficient. Also the tents were pushed together quite close and with a contained fire left unattended one evening was quite dangerous. The music on site either by the club or personal guests went on far to long, 4am so sufficient sleep to be able to enjoy the festival was impossible. We have been to this festival at least 4 times previously and this was by far the worst. That said we did ha e a good time due to the people we knew and met.

Date: 7 August 2019

Rating: OK
	We have been to many festivals of fun, and have noticed over the years the prices have increased and entertainment less.. Bring back the days of the inflatable marquee and the burlesque dancers and pods for playing in, such a waste of space for one band or deflate for extra space for campers... As a camper for 3 years now I felt more unsafe than previous years, dreaded going out to the bar in the dark for drinks as there were no lights in the camping area and so many guide wires overlapping each other, it was so dangerous and unsafe a real trip hazard. The closness of the tent also raised the issue of fire and the apparent absence of any fire fighting equipment should the worse happen Shame the club doesn’t open Friday and Saturday daytime for a private Lap dancing club, obviously at extra price per couple.. And please more toilets and showers, in this lifestyle it’s important to have good cleanliness. I do appreciate the club tries to get people away from their tents and into the club area and this can be a difficult task, so maybe bring the party to the tents. We are all arm chair experts at running a club, but please take this as constructive criticism as we wish the Fof to be nothing more than a huge success. Date: 5 August 2019

Rating: OK

We have been to many festivals of fun, and have noticed over the years the prices have increased and entertainment less.. Bring back the days of the inflatable marquee and the burlesque dancers and pods for playing in, such a waste of space for one band or deflate for extra space for campers... As a camper for 3 years now I felt more unsafe than previous years, dreaded going out to the bar in the dark for drinks as there were no lights in the camping area and so many guide wires overlapping each other, it was so dangerous and unsafe a real trip hazard.

The closness of the tent also raised the issue of fire and the apparent absence of any fire fighting equipment should the worse happen

Shame the club doesn’t open Friday and Saturday daytime for a private Lap dancing club, obviously at extra price per couple..

And please more toilets and showers, in this lifestyle it’s important to have good cleanliness.

I do appreciate the club tries to get people away from their tents and into the club area and this can be a difficult task, so maybe bring the party to the tents.

We are all arm chair experts at running a club, but please take this as constructive criticism as we wish the Fof to be nothing more than a huge success.

Date: 5 August 2019

Rating: OK
	(posted on the VA F of F forum post too) Have attended F of F for the last 4 years and it is a great club, and certainly one of our favourites in the UK, but we did have some concerns/reservations about this year's festival which we hope will be taken as constructive criticism. None of these concerns have arisen in our previous attendances there. The positives.........the club (as previously mentioned), the live music, the foam party, hot tubs and above all else the other guests. What we were less happy about this year.......... 1. On arrival with our friends (in a separate and similar small tent which was set up near to us) we put up a shared small gazebo. It was just large enough to cover seating and a table for the 4 of us and measured just over 2.5m square. We were approached by a member of staff and told that we had not pre-booked a gazebo so it had to be taken down. We pointed out that the gazebo was no bigger than the seating area for 4 people. He agreed that the seating area was a modest size for 4 (and our tents were much smaller than many there) but that according to rules it could not be covered. We didn't think this was logical or reasonable but dismantled it anyway. 2. Toilets/showers - Maybe 150 people there as a conservative estimate perhaps? In previous years we've had the use of the 2 showers inside the club adjacent to the jacuzzi. Not so this year. The door was locked so just 2 indoor and 2 outdoor showers. Maybe not too important as we took the attitude that we would just wait and get one later in the day. More importantly the door to access the inside male / female toilets inside the club (through the BDSM area) was locked at times through the weekend leaving just the 2 toilets to cope with demand from 150+ guests. It's ok to wait for a shower but often the need to go to the toilet is rather more urgent & this isn't really good enough when you've paid £170 for the weekend. 3. Noise - We understand the need for entertainment as an important part of what you pay for but blasting out over the campsite till 4am in the morning surely isn't catering for the majority? It was particularly an issue on the Saturday night when we had a 4 hour drive back home and needed to leave as early as possible on Sunday morning. One of our friends on both nights went to sleep in her car in the car park for some peace. Surely a 1am or even 2am limit isn't unreasonable? Swingfields have a midnight curfew on noise and organise a silent disco for party goers that want to party into the night. 4. Safety - As a fire officer of 27 years experience I did express a concern about cramming the tents/caravans/motorhomes so close together (to the same staff member who was unsympathetic about our joint gazebo). He was completely unmoved by my professional concerns. Whilst we can appreciate that profits have to be maximised at these weekends, perhaps there are other considerations to take into account? Recommended UK Gov guidelines concerning Fire Safety on campsites and published by the Ministry of Housing, Communities & Local Government in 2008 (updated 2015) points out that “A fire can destroy a tent in less than 60 seconds” “On average 360 fires per year occur in caravans” and recommends that `'caravans and tents are at least 6 metres apart and away from parked cars to reduce the risk of fire spreading" Many tents at VA this year were no more than 12 inches apart. Apart from the obvious problem of not being able to move freely between them (or escape easily?) due to guy lines, if a fire happened in one it would very easily and quickly spread to a adjacent one and there's not many tents that don't have gas cylinders within or vehicles that don't have fuel in. If you accept the fact that fire can destroy a tent within 60 seconds, and the possibility that alcohol is to be factored into the equation, the risks perhaps outweigh the considerations for maximising profits by fitting in as many persons as possible into the available area? Fire recommendations also state that the maximum distance between a fire point and a tent should be 30m and that fire points should be easily accessible and conspicuously marked ''FIRE POINT''. There were none. There were also personal BBQ's that were left unattended and with burning embers into the early hours of the morning. Not too difficult to imagine a scenario where a breeze would spread sparks into a nearby tent/motorhome/caravan perhaps? We hope the event continues and wish VA every success but we don't feel comfortable or safe attending next year. Date: 5 August 2019

Rating: OK

(posted on the VA F of F forum post too)

Have attended F of F for the last 4 years and it is a great club, and certainly one of our favourites in the UK, but we did have some concerns/reservations about this year's festival which we hope will be taken as constructive criticism. None of these concerns have arisen in our previous attendances there.

The positives.........the club (as previously mentioned), the live music, the foam party, hot tubs and above all else the other guests.

What we were less happy about this year..........

1. On arrival with our friends (in a separate and similar small tent which was set up near to us) we put up a shared small gazebo. It was just large enough to cover seating and a table for the 4 of us and measured just over 2.5m square. We were approached by a member of staff and told that we had not pre-booked a gazebo so it had to be taken down. We pointed out that the gazebo was no bigger than the seating area for 4 people. He agreed that the seating area was a modest size for 4 (and our tents were much smaller than many there) but that according to rules it could not be covered.

We didn't think this was logical or reasonable but dismantled it anyway.

2. Toilets/showers - Maybe 150 people there as a conservative estimate perhaps? In previous years we've had the use of the 2 showers inside the club adjacent to the jacuzzi. Not so this year. The door was locked so just 2 indoor and 2 outdoor showers. Maybe not too important as we took the attitude that we would just wait and get one later in the day.

More importantly the door to access the inside male / female toilets inside the club (through the BDSM area) was locked at times through the weekend leaving just the 2 toilets to cope with demand from 150+ guests. It's ok to wait for a shower but often the need to go to the toilet is rather more urgent & this isn't really good enough when you've paid £170 for the weekend.

3. Noise - We understand the need for entertainment as an important part of what you pay for but blasting out over the campsite till 4am in the morning surely isn't catering for the majority? It was particularly an issue on the Saturday night when we had a 4 hour drive back home and needed to leave as early as possible on Sunday morning. One of our friends on both nights went to sleep in her car in the car park for some peace. Surely a 1am or even 2am limit isn't unreasonable? Swingfields have a midnight curfew on noise and organise a silent disco for party goers that want to party into the night.

4. Safety - As a fire officer of 27 years experience I did express a concern about cramming the tents/caravans/motorhomes so close together (to the same staff member who was unsympathetic about our joint gazebo). He was completely unmoved by my professional concerns.

Whilst we can appreciate that profits have to be maximised at these weekends, perhaps there are other considerations to take into account?

Recommended UK Gov guidelines concerning Fire Safety on campsites and published by the Ministry of Housing, Communities & Local Government

in 2008 (updated 2015) points out that

“A fire can destroy a tent in less than 60 seconds”

“On average 360 fires per year occur in caravans”

and recommends that

`'caravans and tents are at least 6 metres apart and away from parked cars to reduce the risk of fire spreading"

Many tents at VA this year were no more than 12 inches apart.

Apart from the obvious problem of not being able to move freely between them (or escape easily?) due to guy lines, if a fire happened in one it would very easily and quickly spread to a adjacent one and there's not many tents that don't have gas cylinders within or vehicles that don't have fuel in.

If you accept the fact that fire can destroy a tent within 60 seconds, and the possibility that alcohol is to be factored into the equation, the risks perhaps outweigh the considerations for maximising profits by fitting in as many persons as possible into the available area?

Fire recommendations also state that the maximum distance between a fire point and a tent should be 30m and that fire points should be easily accessible and conspicuously marked ''FIRE POINT''.

There were none.

There were also personal BBQ's that were left unattended and with burning embers into the early hours of the morning. Not too difficult to imagine a scenario where a breeze would spread sparks into a nearby tent/motorhome/caravan perhaps?

We hope the event continues and wish VA every success but we don't feel comfortable or safe attending next year.

Date: 5 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Just got back from va festival of fun had a brilliant time definitely coming back next year.meet some great new friends feel free to message us if we spoke to us Date: 4 August 2019

Rating: Fabulous
	Another great night on Friday 2nd August at VA. So relaxed and a really busy night. We so love this club. No locked rooms, all the fun out of display to be watched or to watch. If your the guy we had a t 3sum with please leave some feedback on our page. We will do likewise. Date: 4 August 2019

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